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\ 






























MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


BY CAPTAIN MARRYATT. 

AUTHOR OF “PETER SIMPLE,” “JACOB FAITHFUL,” “ JAPHET IN SEARCH OF A FATHER,” ETC. 







NEW YORK . 

D. APPLETON & CO., 443 & 445 BROADWAY. 
1866. 


* 


9 


W 







































V 








































MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY 


CHAPTER I. 

WHICH THE READER WILL FIND VERY EASY TO READ. 

Hr. Nicodemus Easy was a gentleman who lived down in 
Hampshire ; he was a married man, and in very easy circum- 
stances. Most couples find it very easy to have a family, but 
not always quite so easy to maintain them. Mr. Easy was not 
at all uneasy on the latter score, as he had no children ; but 
he was anxious to have them, as most people covet what they 
cannot obtain. After ten years, Mr. Easy gave it up as a bad 
job Philosophy is said to console a man under disappoint- 
ment, although Shakspeare asserts that it is no remedy for 
tooth-ache ; so Mr. Easy turned philosopher, the very best pro- 
fession a man can take up, when he is fit /or nothing else ; he 
must be a very incapable person indeed who cannot talk non- 
sense. For some time, Mr. Easy could not decide upon what 
description his nonsense should consist of ; at last he fixed 
upon the rights of man, equality, and all that ; how every 
person was born to inherit his share of the earth, a right at 
present only admitted to a certain length ; that is, about six 
feet, for we all inherit our graves, and are allowed to take pos- 
session without dispute. But no one would listen to Mr. Easy’s 

0 


6 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


philosophy. The women would not acknowledge the rights of 
men, whom they declared always to be in the wrong ; and, as 
the gentlemen who visited Mr. Easy were all men of property, 
they could not perceive the advantages of sharing with those 
who had none. However, they allowed him to discuss the 
question, while they discussed bis port wine. The wine was 
good, if the arguments were not, and we must take things as 
we find them in this world. 

While Mr. Easy talked philosophy, Mrs Easy played 
patience, and they were a very happy couple, riding side by 
side on their hobbies, and never interfering with each other. 
Mr. Easy knew his wife could not understand him, and there- 
fore did not expect her to listen very attentively ; and Mrs. 
Easy did not care how much her husband talked, provided she 
was not put out in her game. Mutual forbearance will always 
ensure domestic felicity. 

There was another cause for their agreeing so well. Upon 
any disputed question, Mr. Easy invariably gave it up to Mrs. 
Easy, telling her that she should have her own way — and this 
pleased his wife ; but, as Mr. Easy always took care, when it 
came to the point, to have his way, he Fas pleased as well. It 
is true that Mrs. Easy had long found out that she did not 
have her own way long ; but she was of an easy disposition, 
and as, in nine cases out of ten, i^was of very little conse- 
quence how things were done, she was quite satisfied with his 
submission during the heat of the argument. Mr. Easy had 
admitted that she was right, and if, like all men, he would do 
wrong, why what could a poor woman do ? With a lady of 
such a quiet disposition, it is easy to imagine that the domestic 
felicity of Mr. Easy was not easily disturbed. But, as people 
have observed before, there is a mutability in human affairs. 
It was at the finale of the eleventh year of their marriage, that 
Mrs. Easy at first complained that she could not enjoy her 
breakfast. Mrs. Easy had her own suspicions, everybody else 
considered it past doubt, all except Mr. Easy ; he little 
“ thought, good easy man, that his greatness was ripening 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 7 

lie had decided that to have an heir was no easy task, and it 
never came into his calculations that there could be a change 
in his wife’s figure. You might have added to it, subtracted 
from it, divided it, or multiplied it, but as it was a zero, the 
result would be always the same. Mrs. Easy also was not 
quite sure — she believed it might be the case, there was no 
saying ; it might be a mistake, like that of Mrs. Trunnion’s 
in the novel, and, therefore, she said nothing to her husband 
about the matter. At last Mr. Easy opened his eyes, and 
when, upon interrogating his wife, he found out the astonishing 
truth, he opened his eyes still wider, and then he snapped his 
fingers, and danced, like a bear upon hot plates, with delight, 
thereby proving that different causes may produce similar 
effects in two instances at one and the same time. The bear 
dances from pain, Mr. Easy from pleasure ; and again, when 
we are indifferent, or do not care for anything, we snap our 
fingers at it, and when we are overjoyed, and obtain what we 
most care for, we also snap our fingers. Two months after 
Mr. Easy snapped his fingers, Mrs. Easy felt no inclination to 
snap hers, either from indifference or pleasure. The fact was, 
that Mrs. Easy’s time was come, to undergo what Shakspeare 
pronounces “ the pleasing punishment that women bear but 
Mrs. Easy, like the rest of her sex, declared, “ that all men 
were liars,” and most particularly poets. 

But while Mrs. Easy was suffering, Mr. Easy was in ecsta- 
sies. He laughed at pain, as all philosophers do when it is 
suffered by other people, and not by themselves. 

In due course of time, Mrs. Easy presented her husband 
with a fine boy, whom we present to the public as our hero. 


8 


£R. MIDSHIPMAN EAST. 


CHAPTER II. 

IN WHICH MRS. EASY, AS USUAL,, HAS HER OWN WAY. 

It was the fourth day after Mrs. Easy’s confinement, that Mr. 
Easy, who was sitting by her bedside in an easy chair, com- 
menced as follows : “ I have been thinking, my dear Mrs. 
Easy, about the name I shall give this child.” 

“Name, Mr. Easy ! why what name should you give it. but 
your own ?” 

“ Not so, my dear,” replied Mr. Easy ; “ they call all names 
proper names, but I think that mine is not. It is the very 
worst name in the calendar.” 

“Why, what’s the matter with it, Mr. Easy ?” 

“ The matter affects me as well as the boy. Nicodemus is a 
long name to write at full length, and Nick is vulgar. Besides, 
as there will be two Nicks, they will naturally call my boy 
young Nick, and of course I shall be styled old Nick, which 
will be diabolical.” 

“ Well, Mr. Easy, at all events then let me choose the 
name.” 

“ That you shall, my dear, and it was with this view that I 
have mentioned the subject so early.” 

“ I think, Mr. Easy, I will call the boy after my poor father 
— his name shall be Robert.” 

“Very well, my dear, if you wish it, it shall be Robert. You 
shall have your own way. But I think, my dear, upon a little 
consideration, you will acknowledge that there is a decided 
objection.” 

“ An objection, Mr. Easy ?” 

“ Yes, my dear ; Robert may be very well, but you must 
reflect upon the consequences ; he is certain to be called 
Bob.” 

“ Well, my dear, and suppose they do call him Bob ?” 

“ I cannot bear even the supposition, my dear. You forget 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


9 


the county in which you are residing, the downs covered with 
sheep.” 

“ Why, Mr. Easy, what can sheep have to do with a Chris- 
tian name ?” 

“ There it is ; women never look to consequences. My dear, 
they have a great deal to do with the name of Bob. I will 
appeal to any farmer in the. country, if ninety-nine shepherds’ 
dogs out of one hundred are not called Bob. Now observe, your 
child is out of doors somewhere in the fields or plantations ; 
you want, and you call him. Instead of your child, what do 
you find ? Why, a dozen curs, at least, who come running up 
to you, all answering to the name of Bob, and wagging their 
stumps of tails. You see, Mrs. Easy, it is a dilemma not to be 
got over. You level your only son to the brute creation by 
giving him a Christian name which, from its peculiar brevity, 
has been monopolized by all the dogs in the county. Any 
other name you please, my dear, but in this one instance you 
must allow me to lay my positive veto.” 

“ Well, then, let me see — but I’ll think of it, Mr. Easy ; my 
head aches very much just now.” 

“ I will think for you, my dear. What do you say to John ?” 

“ 0 no, Mr. Easy, such a common name ?” 

“ A proof of its popularity, my dear. It is scriptural — we 
have the apostle and the baptist — we have a dozen popes who 
were all Johns. It is royal — we have plenty of kings who 
were Johns — and, moreover, it is short, and sounds honest and 
manly.” 

“ Yes, very true, my dear ; but they will call him J ack.” 

“ Well, we have had several celebrated characters who were 
Jacks. There was — let me see — Jack the Giant Killer, and 
Jack of the Bean Stalk — and Jack — Jack — — ” 

“ Jack Spratt,” replied Mrs. Easy. 

“ And Jack Cade, Mrs. Easy, the great rebel — and Three- 
fingered Jack, Mrs. Easy, the celebrated negro — and, above all, 
Jack Falstaff, ma’am, Jack Falstaff — honest Jack Falstaff,— 
witty Jack Falstaff ” 


1 * 


10 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


“ I thought, Mr. Easy, that I was to be permitted to choos3 
the name.” 

“ Well, so you shall, my dear ; I give it up to you. Do just 
as you please ; but depend upon it that John is the right name. 
Is it not now, my dear ?” 

“ It’s the way you always treat me, Mr. Easy ; you say that 
you give it up, and that I shall have my own way, but I never 
do have it. I am sure that the child will be christened 
John.” 

" Nay my dear, it shall be just what you please. Now I 
recollect it, there were several Greek emperors who were Johns; 
but decide for yourself, my dear.” 

“ No, no,” replied Mrs. Easy, who was ill, and unable to* 
contend any longer, “ I give it up Mr. Easy. I know how it 
will be, as it always is : you give me my own way as people 
give pieces of gold to children, it’s their own money, but they 
must not spend it. Pray call him John.” 

“ There, my dear, did not I tell you, you would be of my 
opinion upon reflection ? I knew you would. I have given 
you your own way, and you tell me to call him John ; so now 
we’re both of the same mind, and that point is settled.” 

“ I should like to go to sleep, Mr. Easy ; I feel far from 
well.” 

“ You shall always do just as you like, my dear,” replied the 
husband, “ and have your own way in everything. It is the 
greatest pleasure I have when I yield to your wishes. I will 
walk in the garden. Good-bye, my dear.” 

Mrs. Easy made no reply, and the philosopher quitted the 
room. As may easily be imagined, on the following day the 
boy was christened John. 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


11 


CHAPTER III. 

iN WHICH OUR HERO HAS TO WAIT THE ISSUE* OF AN ARGUMENT 

The reader may observe that, in general, all my first chapters 
are very short, and increase in length as the work advances 
I mention this as a proof of my modesty and diffidence. At 
first, I am like a young bird just out of its mother’s nest, 
uluming my little feathers and taking short flights. By degrees 
I obtain more confidence, and wing my course over hill and 
dale. 

It is very difficult to throw any interest into a chapter on 
childhood. There is the same uniformity in all children until 
they develope. We cannot, therefore, say much relative to 
Jack Easy’s earliest days ; he sucked and threw up his milk, 
while the nurse blessed it for a pretty dear, slept, and sucked 
again. He crowed in the morning like a cock, screamed when 
he was washed, stared at the candle, and made wry faces with 
the wind. Six months passed in these innocent amusements, 
and then he was put into shorts. But I ought here to have 
remarked, that Mrs. Easy did not find herself equal to nursing 
her own infant, and it was necessary to look out for a substitute. 

Now a common-place person would have been satisfied with 
the recommendation of the medical man, who looks but to the 
one thing needful, which is a sufficient and wholesome supply 
of nourishment for the child ; but Mr. Easy was a philosopher, 
and had latterly taken to craniology, and he descanted very 
learnedly with the Doctor upon the effect of his only son 
obtaining his nutriment from an unknown source. “ Who 
knows,” observed Mr. Easy, “ but that my son may not imbibe 
with his milk the very worst passions of human nature ?” 

“ I have examined her,” replied the Doctor, “ and can safely 
recommend her.” 

“ That examination is only preliminary to one more impor- 
tant,” replied Mr. Easy. “ I must examine her ” 


12 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


“ Examine who, Mr. Easy ?” exclaimed his wife, who had 
lain down again on the bed. 

“ The nurse, my dear.” 

“ Examine what, Mr. Easy ?” continued the lady. 

“ Her head my dear,” replied her husband. “ I must ascer- 
tain what her propensities are.” 

“ I think you had better leave her alone, Mr. Easy. She 
comes this evening, and I shall question her pretty severely. 
Doctor Middleton, what do you know of this young per- 
son ?” 

11 1 know, madam, that she is very healthy and strong, or I 
should not have selected her.” 

“ But is her character good ?” 

“ Beally, madam, I know little about her character ; but 
you can make any inquiries you please. But at the same time 
I ought to observe, that if you are too particular in that point, 
you will have some difficulty in providing yourself.” 

u Well, I shall see,” replied Mrs. Easy. 

“ And I shall feel,” rejoined the husband. 

This parleying was interrupted by the arrival of the very 
person in question, who was announced by the housemaid, and 
was ushered in. She was a handsome, florid, healthy-looking 
girl, awkward and naive in her manner, and apparently not 
over wise ; there was more of the dove than of the serpent in 
her composition. 

a Mr. Easy, who was very anxious to make his own dis- 
coveries, was the first who spoke. “ Young woman, come this 
way, I wish to examine your head.” 

“ Oh ! dear me, sir, it’s quite clean, I assure you,” cried the 
girl, dropping a curtsey. 

Doctor Middleton, who sat between the bed and Mr. Easy’s 
chair, rubbed his hands and laughed. 

In the mean time, Mr. Easy had untied the string and taken 
off the cap of the young woman, and was very busy putting his 
fingers through her hair, during which the face of the young 
woman expressed fear and astonishment 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


13 


I am glad to perceive that you have a large portion of 
Benevolence.” 

“ Yes,” replied the young womam, dropping a curtsey. 

“ And veneration, also. 

“ Thanky, sir.” 

u And the organ of modesty is strongly developed.” 

“ Yes, sir,” replied the girl, with a smile. 

“ That’s quite a new organ,” thought Dr. Middleton. 

“ Philo-progenitiveness very powerful.” 

“If you please, sir, I don’t know what that is,” answered 
Sarah with a curtsey. 

“Nevertheless you have given us a practical illustration. 
Mrs. Easy, 1 am satisfied. Have you any questions to ask ? 
But it is quite unnecessary.” 

“ To be sure I have, Mr. Easy. Pray, young woman, what 
is your name ?” 

“ Sarah, if you please, ma’am.” 

“ How long have you been married ?” 

“ Married, ma’am ?” 

“Yes, married.” 

“ If you please, ma’am, I had a misfortune, ma’am,” replied 
the girl, casting down her eyes. 

“ What, have you not been married ?” 

“No, ma’am, not yet.” 

“ Good Heavens 1 Dr. Middleton, what can you mean by 
bringing this person here ?” exclaimed Mrs. Easy. “Not a 
married woman, and she has a child !” 

“ If you please, ma’am,” interrupted the young woman, drop- 
ping a curtsey, “ it was a very little one.” 

“ A very little one !” exclaimed Mrs. Easy. 

“Yes, ma’am, very small indeed, and died soon after it was 
oorn.” 

“ Oh, Doctor Middleton ! — what could you mean, Dr. Mid. 
dleton ?” 

“ My dear madam,” exclaimed the Doctor, rising from his 
chair, “this is the only person I could find suited to the wants 


14 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


of your child, and if you do not take her, I cannot answer 
for its life. It is true, that a married woman might be pro- 
cured; but married women who have a proper feeling, will not 
desert their own children ; and, as Mr. Easy asserts, and you 
appear to imagine, the temper and disposition of your child 
may be affected by the nourishment it receives, I think it more 
likely to be injured by the milk of a married woman who will 
desert her own child for the sake of gain. The misfortune 
which has happened to this young woman is not always a 
proof of a bad heart, but of strong attachment, and the over- 
weening confidence of simplicity.” 

“ You are correct, Doctor,” replied Mr. Easy, “ and her head 
proves that she is a modest young woman, with strong religious 
feeling, kindness of disposition, and every other requisite.” 

“The head may prove it all for what I know, Mr. Easy, but 
her conduct tells another tale.” 

“ She is well fitted for the situation, ma’am,” continued the 
Doctor. 

“And if you please, ma’am,” rejoined Sarah, “it was such a 
little one.” 

“ Shall I try the baby, ma’am ?” said the monthly nurse, who 
had listened in silence. “ It is fretting so, poor thing, and has 
its dear little fist right down its throat.” 

Dr. Middleton gave the signal of assent, and in a few seconds 
Master John Easy was fixed to Sarah as tight as a leech. 

“ Lord love it, how hungry it is ! — there, there, stop it a 
moment, it’s choking, poor thing.” 

Mrs. Easy, who was lying on her bed, rose up, and went to 
the child. Her first feeling was that of envy, that another 
should have such a pleasure which was denied to herself, the 
next that of delight, at the satisfaction expressed by the infant. 
In a few minutes the child fell back in a deep sleep. Mrs. 
Easy was satisfied; maternal feelings conquered all others, and 
Sarah was duly installed. 

To make short work of it, we have said that Jack Easy in six 
months was in shorts. He soon afterwards began to crawl and 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


15 


show his legs ; indeed, so indecorously, that it was evident he 
had imbibed no modesty with Sarah’s milk, neither did he appear 
to have gained veneration or benevolence, for he snatched at 
every thing, squeezed the kitten to death, scratched his mother, 
and pulled his father by the hair ; notwithstanding all which, 
both his father and mother and the whole household declared 
him to be the finest and sweetest child in the universe. But if 
we were to narrate all the wonderful events of Jack’s child- 
hood from the time of his birth up to the age of seven years, 
as chronicled by Sarah, who continued his dry nurse after he 
had been weaned, it would take at least three volumes folio. 
J ack was brought up in the way that every only child usually 
is — that is, he was allowed to have his own way. 


CHAPTER IV. 

IN WHICH THE DOCTOR PRESCRIBES" GOING TO SCHOOL AS A REMEDY 
FOR A CUT FINGER. 

" Have you no idea of putting the boy to school, Mr. Easy ?” 
said Hr. Middleton, who had been summoned by a groom with 
his horse in a foam to attend immediately at Forest Hill, the 
name of Mr. Easy’s mansion, and who, upon his arrival, had 
found that Master Easy had cut his thumb. One would have 
thought that he had cut his head off by the agitation pervad- 
ing the whole household — Mr. Easy walking up and down very 
uneasy, Mrs. Easy with great difficulty prevented from syncope, 
and all the maids bustling and passing round Mrs. Easy’s chair. 
Every body appeared excited except Master Jack Easy himself, 
who, with a rag round his finger, and his pinafore spotted with 
blood, was playing at bob-cherry, and cared nothing about the 
matter. 

“ Well, what’s the matter, my little man ?” said Hr. Middle- 


16 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


ton, on entering, addressing himself to Jack, as the most sensi 
ble of the whole party ?” 

“ Oh, Dr. Middleton,” interrupted Mrs. Easy, “ he has cut 
his hand ; I’m sure that a nerve is divided, and then the lock- 
jaw ” 

The Doctor made no reply, but examined the finger : Jack 
Easy continued to play bob-cherry with his right hand. 

“ Have you such a thing as a piece of sticking-plaster in the 
house, madam ?” observed the Doctor, after examination. 

“ 0 yes : — run, Mary — run, Sarah ?” In a few seconds the 
maids appeared, Sarah bringing the sticking-plaster, and Mary 
following with the scissors. 

“ Make yourself quite easy, madam,” said Dr. Middleton, 
after he put on the plaster, “ I will answer for no evil conse- 
quences.” 

“ Had I not better take him up stairs, and let him lie down 
a little ?” replied Mrs. Easy, slipping a guinea into the doctor’s 
hand. 

“It is not absolutely requisite, madam,” said the doctor ; 

“ but at all events he will be kept out of more mischief.” 

“ Come, my dear, you hear what Dr. Middleton says.” 

“Yes, I heard,” replied Jack ; “ but I sha’nt go.” # 

“ My dear Johnny — come, love — now do, my dear Johnny.” 

Johnny played bob-cherry, and made no answer. 

“ Come, Master Johnny,” said Sarah. 

“ Go away, Sarah,” said Johnny, with a backhander. 

“ Oh, fie ! Master Johnny,” said Mary. 

“ Johnny, my love,” said Mrs. Easy in a coaxing tone, “ coma 
now — will you go ?” 

“ I’ll go in the garden and get some more cherries,” replied 
Master Johnny. 

“ Come, then, love, we will go into the garden.” 

Master Johnny jumped off his chair, and took his mamma by 
the hand. 

' “ What a dear, good, obedient child it is 1” exclaimed Mra 
Easy : “ you may lead him with a thread.” 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


n 


“ Yes, to pick cherries,” thought Dr. Middleton. 

Mrs. Easy, and J ohnny, and Sarah, and Mary, went into the 
garden, leaving Dr. Middleton alone with Mr. Easy, who had 
been silent during this scene. Now Dr. Middleton was a clever, 
sensible man, who had no wish to impose upon any one. As 
for his taking a guinea for putting on a piece of sticking-plaster, 
his conscience was very easy on that score. His time was 
equally valuable, whether he were employed for something or 
nothing ; and moreover, he attended the poor gratis. Con- 
stantly in the house, he had seen much of Mr. John Easy, and 
perceived that he was a courageous, decided boy, of a naturally 
good disposition ; but from the idiosyncrasy of the father, and 
the doating folly of the mother, in a sure way of being spoiled. 
As soon, therefore, as the lady was out of hearing, he took a 
chair, and made* the query at the commencement of the chapter, 
which we shall now repeat.” 

“ Have you no idea of putting the boy to school, Mr. Easy?” 

Mr. Easy crossed his legs, and clasped his hands together 
over his knees, as he always did when he was about to com- 
mence an argument. 

“ The great objection that I have of sending a boy to school, 
Dr. Middleton, is, that I conceive that the discipline enforced 
is, not only contrary to the rights of man, but also in opposi- 
tion to all sound sense and common judgment. Not content 
with punishment, which is in itself erroneous, and an infringe- 
ment of social justice, they even degrade the minds of the boys 
still more by applying punishment to the most degraded part, 
adding contumely to tyranny. Of course, it is intended that a 
boy who is sent to school should gain by precept and example ; 
but is he to learn benevolence by the angry look and the flourish 
of the vindictive birch, — or forbearance by the cruelty of the 
ushers, — or patience, when the masters over him are out of all 
patience, — of modesty, when his nether parts are exposed to 
general examination ? Is he not daily reading a lesson at 
variance with that equality which we all possess, but of which 
we are unjustly deprived ? Why should there be a distinction 


18 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


between the flogger and floggee ? 'Are they not both fashioned 
alike after God’s image, endowed with the same reason, having 
an equal right to what the world offers, and which was in- 
tended by Providence to be equally distributed ? Is it not that 
the sacred inheritance of all, which has tyrannously and im- 
piously been ravished from the many for the benefit of the few, 
and which ravishment, from long custom of iniquity and incul- 
cation of false precepts, has too long been basely submitted to ? 
Is it not the duty of a father to preserve his only son from im- 
bibing these dangerous and debasing errors, which will render 
him only one of the vile herd who are content to suffer, pro- 
vided that they live ? And yet are not these very errors incul- 
cated at school, and impressed upon their mind inversely by 
the birch ? Do not they receive their first lesson in slavery 
with the first lesson in A B C ; and are not their minds thereby 
prostrated, so as never to rise again, but ever to bow to des- 
potism, to cringe to rank, to think and act by the precepts of 
others, and to tacitly disavow that sacred equality which is 
our birthright ? No, sir, without they can teach without re- 
sorting to such a fundamental error as flogging, my boy shall 
never go to school.” 

And Mr. Easy threw himself back in his chair, imagining, 
like all philosophers, that he had said something very clever. 

Dr. Middleton knew his man, and therefore patiently waited 
until he had exhausted his oratory. 

“ I will grant,” said the doctor at last, “ that all you say 
may have great truth in it ; but, Mr. Easy, do you not think 
that by not permitting a boy to be educated, you allow him to 
remain more open to that very error of which you speak ? It 
is only education which will conquer prejudice, and enable a 
man to break through the trammels of custom. Now, allow- 
ing that the birch is used, yet it is at a period when the young 
mind is so elastic as to soon become indifferent ; and after he 
has attained the usual rudiments of education, you will then 
find him prepared to receive those lessons which you can your- 
self instil ” 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


19 


u I will teach him everything myself,” replied Mr. Easy, 
folding his arms consequentially and determinedly. 

“ I do not doubt your capability, Mr. Easy ; but unfortu- 
nately you will always have a difficulty which you never can 
get over. Excuse me, I know what you are capable of, and 
the boy would, indeed, be happy with such a preceptor, but — 
if I must speak plain — you must be aware as well as I am, 
that the maternal fondness of Mrs. Easy will always be a bar 
to your intention. He is already so spoiled by her, that he 
will not obey : and without obedience you cannot inculcate.” 

“I grant, my dear sir, that there is a difficulty on that 
point ; but maternal weakness must then be overcome by 
paternal severity.” 

“May I ask how, Mr. Easy? for it appears to me impossi- 
ble.” 

“ Impossible ! By heavens, Pll make him obey, or I’ll ” 

■ — Here Mr. Easy stopped before the word flog was fairly out 
of his mouth, — “ I’ll know the reason why, Hr. Middleton.” 

Hr. Middleton checked his inclination to laugh, and replied, 
“ That you would hit upon some scheme, by which you would 
obtain the necessary power over him, I have no doubt ; but 
what will be the consequence ? The boy will consider • his 
mother as a protector, and you as a tyrant. He will have an 
aversion to you, and with that aversion he will never pay 
respect and attention to your valuable precepts when he arrives 
at an age to understand them. Now it appears to me that 
this difficulty which you have raised may be got over. I know 
a very worthy clergyman who does not use the birch ; but I 
will write, and put the direct question to him ; and then if 
your boy is removed from the danger arising from Mrs. Easy’s 
over-indulgence, in a short time he will be ready for your more 
important tuition.” 

“ I think,” replied Mr. Easy, after a pause, “ that what you 
say merits consideration. I acknowledge that in consequence 
of Mrs. Easy’s nonsensical indulgence,' the boy is unruiy, and 
will not obey me at present ; and if your friend does not apply 


20 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


the rod, I will think seriously of sending my son J ohn to him 
to learn the elements.” 

The doctor had gained his point by flattering the philoso- 
pher. 

In a day he returned with a letter from the pedagogue in 
answer to one supposed to be sent to him, in which the use of 
the birch was indignantly disclaimed, and Mr. Easy announced 
to his wife, when they met that day at tea-time, his intentions 
with regard to his son John. 

“ To school, Mr. Easy ? what, send Johnny to school ! a 
mere infant to school 1” 

“ Surely, my dear, you must be aware that at nine years it 
is high time that he learned to read.” 

“ Why, he almost reads already, Mr. Easy ; surely I can 
teach him that. Does he not, Sarah ?” 

“ Lord bless him, yes, ma’am, he was saying his letters yes- 
terday.” 

“ Oh, Mr. Easy, what can have put this in your head ? 
Johnny, dear, come here — tell me now what’s the letter A ? 
You were singing it in the garden this morning.” 

“I want some sugar,” replied Johnny, stretching his arm 
over the table to the sugar-basin, which was out of his reach. 

“Well, my love, you shall have a great lump if you will tell 
me what’s the letter A.” 

“A wa,s an archer, and shot at a frog,” replied Johnny, in a 
surly tone. 

“ There, now, Mr. Easy ; and he can go through the whole 
alphabet — can’t he, Sarah ?” 

“ That he can, the dear — can’t you, Johnny dear ?” 

“ No,” replied Johnny. 

“Yes, you can, my love ; you know what’s the letter B. 
Now, don’t you?” 

“Yes,” replied Johnny. 

“ There, Mr. Easy, you see what the boy knows, and how 
obedient he is, too. Come, Johnny dear, tell us what was 

B?” 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


21 


“No, I won’t,” replied Johnny, “ I want some more sugar f 
and Johnny, who had climbed on a chair, spread himself over 
the table to reach it. 

“ Mercy ! Sarah, pull him off — he’ll upset the urn,” screamed 
Mrs. Easy. Sarah caught hold of J ohnny by the loins to pull 
him back, but Johnny, resisting the interference, turned round 
on his back as he lay on the table, and kicked Sarah in the 
face, just as she made another desperate grasp at him. The 
rebound from the kick, given as he lay on a smooth mahogany 
table, brought Johnny’s head in contact with the urn, which 
was upset in the opposite direction, and, notwithstanding a 
rapid movement on the part of Mr. Easy, he received a suffi- 
cient portion of boiling liquid on his legs to scald him severely, 
and induce him to stamp and swear in a very unphilosophical 
way. In the mean time Sarah and Mrs. Easy had caught up 
Johnny, and were both holding him at the same time, exclaim- 
ing and lamenting. The pain of the scald, and the indifference 
shown towards him, were too much for Mr. Easy’s temper to 
put up with. He snatched Johnny out of their arms, and, 
quite forgetting his equality and rights of man, belaboured him 
without mercy. Sarah flew in to interfere, and received a 
blow which not only made her see a thousand stars, but sent 
her reeling on the floor. Mrs. Easy went off into hysterics, 
and Johnny howled so as to be heard at a quarter of a mile. 

How long Mr. Easy would have continued it is impossible to 
say ; but the door opened, and Mr. Easy looked up while still 
administering the punishment, and perceived Dr. Middleton in 
mute astonishment. He had promised to come in to tea, and 
enforce Mr. Easy’s arguments, if it were necessary ; but it 
certainly appeared to him, that in the argument which Mr. 
Easy was then enforcing, he required no assistance. However, 
at the entrance of Dr. Middleton, Johnny was dropped, and 
lay roaring on the floor ; Sarah, too, remained where she had 
been floored, Mrs. Easy had rolled on the floor, the urn was 
also on the floor, and Mr. Easy, although not floored, had not 
a leg to stand upon. 


22 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


Never did a medical man look in more opportunely. Mr. 
Easy at first was not certainly of that opinion, but his legs 
became so painful that he soon became a convert. 

Dr. Middleton, as in duty bound, first picked up Mrs. Easy, 
and laid her on the sofa. Sarah rose, picked up Johnny, and 
carried him kicking and roaring out of the room ; in return for 
which attention she received sundry bites. The footman, who 
had announced the doctor, picked up the urn, that being all 
that was in his department. Mr. Easy threw himself panting 
and in agony on the other sofa, and Dr. Middleton was exces- 
sively embarrassed how to act : he perceived that Mr. Easy 
required his assistance, and that Mrs. Easy could do without it ; 
but how to leave a lady who was half really and half pretendedly 
in hysterics, was difficult ; for if he attempted to leave her, she 
kicked and flounced, and burst out the more. At last Dr. 
Middleton rang the bell, which brought the footman, who sum- 
moned all the maids, who carried Mrs. Easy up stairs, and then 
the Doctor was able to attend to the only patient who really 
required his assistance. Mr. Easy explained the affair in few 
words, broken into ejaculations from pain, as the Doctor 
removed his stockings. From the applications of Dr. Middle- 
ton, Mr. Easy soon obtained bodily relief ; but what annoyed 
him ^till more than his scalded legs, was the Doctor having 
been a witness to his infringement of the equality and rights 
of man. Dr. Middleton perceived this, and he knew also how 
to pour balm into that wound. 

“ My dear Mr. Easy, I am very sorry that you have had this 
accident, for which you are indebted to Mrs. Easy’s foolish 
indulgence of the boy ; but I am glad to perceive that you 
have taken up those parental duties which are inculcated by 
the Scriptures. Solomon says, ‘ that he who spares the rod, 
spoils the child/ thereby implying that it is the duty of a father 
to correct his children, and in a father, the so doing does not 
interfere with the rights of man, or any natural equality, for the 
son being a part or portion of the father, he is only correcting 
his own self ; and the proof of it is, that a father, in punishing 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


23 


his own son, feels as much pain in so doing as if he were him 
self punished. It is, therefore, nothing but self-discipline, 
which is strictly enjoined us by the Scriptures.” 

“ That is exactly my opinion,” replied Mr. Easy, comforted 
at the Doctor having so logically got him out of the scrape. 
“ But — he shall go to school to-morrow, that I’m determined 
on.” 

“ He will have to thank Mrs. Easy for that,” replied the 
Doctor. 

“ Exactly,” replied Mr. Easy. “ Doctor, my legs are getting 
very hot again.” 

“ Continue to bathe them with the vinegar and water, Mr. 
Easy, until I send you an embrocation, which will give you im- 
mediate relief. I will call to-morrow. By-the-bye, I am to see 
a little patient at Mr. Bonnycastle’s : if it is any accommoda- 
tion, I will take your son with me.” 

“ It will be a great accommodation, Doctor,” replied Mr. 
Easy. 

“ Then, my dear sir, I will just go up and see how Mrs. 
Easy is, and to-morrow I will call at ten. I can wait an hour. 
Good night. 

“ Good night, Doctor.” 

The Doctor had his game to play with Mrs. Easy. He mag- 
nified her husband’s accident — he magnified his wrath, and 
advised her by no means to say one word, until he was well, 
and more pacified. The next day he repeated this dose, and, in 
spite of the ejaculations of Sarah, and the tears of Mrs. Easy, 
who dared not venture to plead her cause, and the violent 
resistance of Master Johnny, who appeared to have a presenti- 
ment of what was to come, our hero was put into Dr. Middle- 
ton’s chariot, and with the exception of one plate of glass, 
which he kicked out of the window with his feet, and for which 
feat, the Doctor, now that he had him all to himself, boxed 
his ears till he was nearly blind, he was, without any further 
eventful occurrence, carried by the Doctor’s footman into the 
parlour of Mr. Bonnycastle. 


24 


MB. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


CHAPTER V. 

JACK EASY IS SENT TO A SCHOOL AT WHICH THERE IS NO FLOGGING. 

Master Jack had been plumped down in a chair by the Hoc- 
tops servant, who, as he quitted him, first looked at his own 
hands, from which the blood was drawn in several parts, and 
then at Master Jack, with his teeth closed and lips compressed, 
as much as to say, “ If I only dared, would not I, that’s all ?” 
and then walked out of the room, repaired to the carriage at 
the front door, when he showed his hands to the coachman, 
who looked down from his box in great commiseration, at the 
same time fully sharing his fellow-servant’s indignation. But 
we must repair to the parlor. Dr. Middleton ran over a news- 
paper, while J ohnny sat on the chair all of a heap, looking 
like a lump of sulks, with his feet on the upper front bar, and 
his knees almost up to his nose. He was a promising pupil, 
Jack. 

Mr. Bonnycastle made his appearance — a tall, well-built, 
handsome, fair man, with a fine powdered head, dressed in 
solemn black, and knee buckles; his linen beautifully clean, and 
with a peculiar bland expression of countenance. When he 
smiled he showed a row of teeth white as ivory, and his mild 
blue eye was the ne plus ultra of beneficence. He was the 
beau-ideal of a preceptor, and it was impossible to see him and 
hear his mild pleasing voice, without wishing that all your sons 
were under his protection. He was a ripe scholar, and a good 
one, and at the time we speak of had the care of upwards o A 
one hundred boys. He was celebrated for turning them out 
well, and many of his pupils were rising fast in the senate, as 
well as distinguishing themselves in the higher professions. 

Dr. Middleton, who was on intimate terms with Bonnycastle, 
rose as he entered the room, and they shook hands. Middleton 
then turned to where Jack sat, and pointing to him, said, 
“ Look there ” 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


25 


Bonnycastle smiled. “ I cannot say that I have had worse, 
but I have almost as bad. I will apply the Promethean torch, 
and soon vivify that rude mass. Come, sit down, Middleton ” 

“ But,” said the Doctor, as he resumed his chair, “ tell me, 
Bonnycastle, how you will possibly manage to lick such a cub 
into shape, when you do not resort to flogging ?” 

“ I have no opinion of flogging, and therefore I do not resort 
to it. The fact is, I was at Harrow myself, and was rather a 
pickle. I was called up as often as most boys in school, and I 
perfectly recollect that eventually I cared nothing for a flog- 
ging. I had become case-hardened. It is the least effective 
part you can touch a boy upon. It leaves nothing behind to 
refresh their memory.” 

“ I should have thought otherwise.” 

“ My dear Middleton, I can produce more effect by one can- 
ing than twenty floggings. Observe, you flog upon a part for 
the most part quiescent; but you cane upon all parts, from the 
head to the heels. Now, when once the first sting of the birch 
is over, then a dull semsation comes over the part, and the pain 
after that is nothing; whereas a good sound caning leaves sores 
and bruises in every part, and on all the parts which are re- 
quired for muscular action. After a flogging, a boy may run 
out in the hours of recreation and join his playmates as well as 
ever, but a good caning tells a very different tale; he cannot 
move one part of his body without being reminded for days by 
the pain of the punishment he has undergone, and he is very 
careful how he is called up again.” 

“ My dear sir, I really had an idea that you were excessively 
lenient,” replied Middleton, laughing; “I am glad that I am 
under a mistake.” 

“ Look at that cub, Doctor, sitting there more like a brute 
than a reasonable being; do you imagine that I could ever lick 
it into shape without strong measures ? At the same time, 
allow me to say that I consider my system by far the best. At 
the public schools, punishment is no check; it is so trifling that 
it is derided: with me punishment is punishment in the true 

9 


26 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EAST. 


sense of the word, and the consequence is, that it is much more 
seldom resorted to.” 

“ You are a terrorist, Bonnycastle.” 

tl The two strongest impulses in our nature are fear and love. 
In theory, acting upon the latter is very beautiful; but in prac- 
tice I never found it to answer — and for the best of reasons, our 
self-love is stronger than our love for others. Now I never 
yet found fear to fail, for the very same reason that the other 
does, because with fear we act upon self-love, and nothing 
else.” 

11 And yet we have many now who would introduce a system 
of schooling without correction; and who maintain 'that the 
present system is degrading.” 

“ There are a great many fools in this world, Doctor.” 

“ That reminds me of this boy’s father,” replied Dr. Middle- 
ton; who then detailed to the pedagogue the idiosyncrasy of 
Mr. Easy, and all the circumstances attending Jack being sent 
to his school. 

“ There is no time to be lost then, Doctor. I must conquer 
this young gentleman before his parents call to see him. De- 
pend upon it, in a week I will have him obedient and well broke 
in.” 

Dr. Middleton wished J ack good-bye, and told him to be a 
good boy. Jack did not vouchsafe to answer. “ Nevermind, 
Doctor, he will be more polished next time you call here, de- 
pend upon it.” And the Doctor departed. 

Although Mr. Bonnycastle was severe, he was very judicious 
Mischief of all kinds was visited but by slender punishment, 
such as being kept in at play hours, &c. ; and he seldom inter- 
fered with the boys for fighting, although he checked decided 
oppression. The great sine qua non with him was attention to 
their studies. He soon discovered the capabilities of his pupils, 
and he forced them accordingly; but the idl6 boy, the bird who 
“ could sing and wouldn’t sing,” received no mercy. The con- 
sequence was, that he turned out the cleverest boys, and his 
conduct was so uniform and unvarying in its tenor, that if h/ 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


27 


was feared when they were under his control, he was invariably 
liked by those whom he had instructed, and they continued his 
friends in after life. 

Mr. Bonnycastle at once perceived that it was no use coaxing 
our hero, and that fear was the only attribute by which he 
could be controlled. So as soon as Doctor Middleton had 
quitted the room, he addressed him in a commanding tone, 
11 Now, boy, what is your name ?” 

Jack started; he looked up at his master, perceived his eye 
fixed upon him, and a countenance not to be played with. 
Jack was no fool, and somehow or another the discipline he had 
received from his father had given him some intimation of what 
was to come. All this put together induced Jack to con- 
descend to answer, with his fore finger between his teeth, 
“ Johnny.” 

“ And what is your other name, sir ?” 

Jack, who appeared to repent his condescension, did not 
at first answer, but he looked again in Mr. Bonnycastle’s face, 
and then round the room: there was no one to help him, and 
he could not help himself, so he replied, “ Easy.” 

“ Do you know why you are sent to school ?” 

“ Scalding father.” 

“ No; you are sent to learn to read and write.” 

“ But I won’t read and write,” replied Jack sulkily. 

“ Yes, you will; and you are going to read your letters now 
directly.” x 

Jack made no answer. Mr. Bonnycastle opened a sort of 
book-case, and displayed to John’s astonished view a series of 
canes, ranged up and down like billiard cues, and continued, 
‘ Do you know what those are for ?” 

Jack eyed them wistfully; he had some faint idea that he 
was sure to be better acquainted with them, but he made no 
answer. 

“ They are to teach little boys to read and write, and now I 
am going to teach you. You’ll soon learn. Look now here,” 
continued Mr. Bonnycastle, opening a book with large type, 


28 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


and taking a capital at the head of a chapter, about half an 
inch long. “ Do you see that letter ?” 

“ Yes,” replied Johnny, turning his eyes away, and picking 
his fingers. 

“Well, that is the letter B. Do you see it ? look at it, so 
that you may know it again. That’s the letter B. Now tell 
me what letter that is.” 

Jack now determined to resist, so he made no answer. 

“ So you cannot tell; well, then, we will try what one of 
these little fellows will do,” said Mr. Bonnycastle, taking down 
a cane. “ Observe, Johnny, that’s the letter B. Now, what 
letter is that ? Answer me directly.” 

“ I won’t learn to read and write.” 

Whack came the cane on Johnny’s shoulders, who burst out 
into a roar as he writhed with pain. 

Mr. Bonnycastle waited a few seconds. “ That’s the letter 
B. Now tell me, sir, directly, what that letter is ?” 

“ I’ll tell my mar” Whack! “ 0 law! 0 law!” 

“ What letter is that ?” 

Johnny, with his mouth open, panting, and the tears on his 
cheeks, answered indignantly, “ Stop till I tell Sarah.” 

Whack came the cane again, and a fresh burst from Johnny. 

“ What letter’s that ?” 

“ I won’t tell,” roared Johnny ; “ I won’t tell — that I 
won’t.” 

Whack — whack — whack, and a pause. “ I told you before, 
that’s the letter B. What letter is that ? Tell me directly.” 

Johnny, by way of reply, made a snatch at the cane. 
Whack — he caught it, certainly, but not exactly as he would 
have wished. Johnny then snatched up the book, and dashed 
it to the corner of the room. Whack, whack. Johnny 
attempted to seize Mr. Bonnycastle with his teeth. Whack, 
whack, whack, whack ; and Johnny fell on the carpet, and 
roared with pain. Mr. Bonnycastle then left him for a little 
While, to recover himself, and sat down. 

At last Johnny’s exclamation settled down in deep sobs, 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


29 


and then Mr. Bonnycastle said to him, “ Now, Johnny, you 
perceive that you must do as you are bid, or else you will 
have more beating. Get up immediately. Do you hear, sir ?” 

Somehow or another, Johnny, without intending it, stood 
upon his feet. 

lt That’s a good boy ; now you see, by getting up as you 
were bid, you have not been beaten. Now, Johnny, you must 
go and bring the book from where you threw it down. Do 
you hear, sir ? Bring it directly 1” 

Johnny looked at Mr. Bonnycastle and the cane. With 
every intention to refuse, Johnny picked up the book and 
laid it on the table. * 

“ That’s a good boy ; now we will find the letter B. Here 
it is : now, Johnny, tell me what that letter is ?” 

Johnny made no answer. 

“ Tell me directly, sir,” said Mr. Bonnycastle, raising his cane 
up in the air. The appeal was too powerful. Johnny eyed 
the cane ; it moved, it was coming. Breathlessly he shrieked 
out, “ B !” 

“ Very well indeed, Johnny — very well. Now your first les- 
son is over, and you shall go to bed. You have learnt more 
than you think for. To-morrow we will begin again. Now 
we’ll put the cane by.” 

Mr. Bonnycastle rang the bell, and desired Master Johnny 
to be put to bed, in a room by himself, and not to give him 
any supper, as hunger would the next morning, much facilitate 
his studies. Pain and hunger alone will tame brutes, and the 
same remedy must be applied to conquer those passions in man 
which assimilate him with brutes. Johnny was conducted to 
bed, although it was but six o’clock. He was not only in pain, 
but his ideas were confused ; and no wonder, after all his life 
having been humoured and indulged — never punished until the 
day before. After all the caresses of his mother and Sarah, 
which he never knew the value of — after stuffing himself all 
day long, and being tempted to eat till he turned away in 
satiety, to find himself without his mother, without Sarah, with- 


30 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EAST. 


out supper — covered with wheals, and, what was worse than 
all, without his own way. No wonder Johnny was confused ; 
at the same time that he was subdued ; and, as Mr. Bonny- 
castle had truly told him, he had learnt more than he had any 
idea of. And what would Mrs. Easy have said, had she known 
all this — and Sarah too ? And Mr. Easy, with his rights of 
man ? At the very time that Johnny was having the devil 
driven out of him, they were consoling themselves with the 
idea, that, at all events, there was no birch used at Mr. Bon- 
nycastle’s, quite losing sight of the fact, that as there are 
more ways of killing a dog besides hanging him, so are there 
more ways of teaching than a posteriori. Happy in their 
ignorance, they all went fast asleep, little dreaming that 
Johnny was already so far advanced in knowledge, as to have 
a tolerable comprehension of the mystery of cane. As for 
Johnny, he had cried himself to sleep, at least six hours 
before them. 


CHAPTER VI. 

IN WHICH JACK MAKES ESSAY OF HIS FATHER^ SUBLIME PHILOSOPHY, 
AND ARRIVES VERY NEAR TO TRUTH AT LAST. 

The next morning Master Jack Easy was not only very sore 
but very hungry, and as Mr. Bonnycastle informed him, that he 
would not only have plenty of cane, but also no breakfast, if 
he did not learn his letters, Johnny had wisdom enough to say 
the whole alphabet, for which he received a great deal of 
praise, the which, if he did not duly appreciate, he at all events 
infinitely preferred to beating. Mr. Bonnycastle perceived that 
he had conquered the boy by one hour’s well-timed severity. 
He therefore handed him over to the ushers in the school, and 
as they were equally empowered to administer the needful 
impulse, J ohnny very soon became a very tractable boy. 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EAST. 


31 


It may be imagined that the absence of Johnny was severely 
felt at home, but such was not the case. In the first place, Dr. 
Middleton had pointed out to Mrs. Easy that there was no flog- 
ging at the school, and that the punishment received by 
Johnny from his father would very likely be repeated — and in 
the next, although Mrs. Easy thought that she never could 
have survived the parting with her own son, she soon found out 
that she was much happier without him. A spoilt child is 
always a source of anxiety and worry, and after Johnny’s de- 
parture, Mrs. Easy found a quiet and repose much more suited 
to her disposition. Gradually she weaned herself from him, 
and, satisfied with seeing him occasionally, and hearing the 
rtports of Dr. Middleton, she, at last, was quite reconciled to 
his being at school, and not coming back except during the 
holidays. John Easy made great progress ; he had good 
natural abilities, and Mr. Easy rubbed his hands when he saw 
the doctor, saying, “Yes, let them have him for a year or two 
longer, and then I’ll finish him myself.” Each vacation he had 
attempted to instil into Johnny’s mind the equal rights of man. 
Johnny appeared to pay but little attention to his father’s dis- 
courses, but evidently showed that they were not altogether 
thrown away, as he helped himself to every thing he wanted, 
without asking leave. And thus was our hero educated until 
he arrived at the age of sixteen, when he was a stout, good- 
looking boy, with plenty to say for himself, — indeed, when it 
suited his purpose, he could out-talk his father. 

Nothing pleased Mr. Easy so much as Jack’s loquacity. 
“ That’s right ; argue the point, Jack— argue the point, boy,” 
would he say, as Jack disputed with his mother. And then he 
would turn to the doctor, rubbing his hands, and observe, 
“ Depend upon it, Jack will be a great, a very great man.” 
And then he would call Jack, and give him a guinea for his 
cleverness ; and at last Jack thought it a very clever thing to 
argue. He never would attempt to argue with Mr. Bonnycastle, 
because he was aware that Mr. Bonnycastle’s arguments were 
too strong for him, but he argued with all the boys until it 


32 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


ended in a fight, which decided the point ; and he sometimes 
argued with the ushers. In short, at the time we now speak 
of, which was at the breaking up of the Midsummer holidays, 
Jack was as full of argument as he was fond of it. He would 
argue the point to the point of a needle, and he would divide 
that point into as many as there were days of the year, and 
argue upon each. In short, there was no end to Jack's arguing 
the point, although there seldom was point to his argument. 

Jack had been fishing in the river, without any success, for a 
whole morning, and observed a large pond which had the 
appearance of being well stocked — he cleared the park palings, 
and threw in his line. He had pulled up several fine fish, when 
he was accosted by the proprietor, accompanied by a couple of 
keepers. 

“ May I request the pleasure of your name, young gentle- 
man ?” said the proprietor to Jack. 

Now Jack was always urbane and polite. 

“ Certainly, sir ; my name is Easy, very much at your ser- 
vice.” 

“ And you appear to me to be taking it very easy,” replied 
the gentleman. “ Pray, sir, may I inquire whether you are 
aware that you are trespassing ?” 

“ The word trespass, my dear sir,” replied Jack, “ will admit 
of much argument, and I will divide it into three heads. It 
implies, according to the conventional meaning, coming with- 
out permission upon the land or property of another. Now, 
sir, the question may all be resolved in the following : Was 
not the world made for all ? and has any one, or any por 
tion of its inhabitants, an exclusive right to claim any part of 
Jt, as his property ? If you please, I have laid down the pro- 
position, and we will now argue the point.” 

The gentleman who accosted Jack had heard of Mr. Easy 
and his arguments ; he was a humorist, and more inclined to 
laugh than to be angry ; at the same time, that he considered 
it necessary to show Jack that, under existing circumstances, 
they were not tenable. 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


33 


“ But, Mr. Easy, allowing the trespass on the property to be 
venial, surely you do not mean to say that you are justified in 
taking my fish ; I bought the fish, and stocked the pond, and 
have fed them ever since. You cannot deny but that they are 
private property, and that to take them is a theft ?” 

“ That will again admit of much ratiocination, my dear sir,” 
replied Jack; “but — I beg your pardon, I have a fish.” Jack 
pulled up a large carp, much to the indignation of the keepers 
and to the amusement of their master, unhooked it, placed it 
in his basket, renewed his bait with the greatest sang froid, 
and then throwing in his line, resumed his discourse. “ As I 
was observing, my dear sir,” continued Jack. “ that will admit 
of much ratiocination. All the creatures of the earth were 
given to man for his use — man means mankind — they were 
never intended to be made a monopoly of. Water is also the 
gift of heaven, and meant for the use of all. We now come to 
the question how far the fish are your property. If the fish only 
bred on purpose to please you, and make you a present of their 
stock, it might then require a different line of argument ; but 
as in breeding they only acted in obedience to an instinct with 
which they are endowed on purpose that they may supply man, 
I submit to you that you cannot prove these fish to be yours 
more than mine. As for feeding with the idea that they were 
your own, that is not an unusual case in this world, even when 
a man is giving bread and butter to his children. Further — 
but I have another bite — I beg your pardon, my dear sir — All I 
he’s off again ” » 

“ Then, Mr. Easy, you mean to say that the world and its 
contents are made for all.” 

“ Exactly, sir, that is my father’s opinion, who is a very 
great philosopher.” 

“ How, then, does your father account for some possessing 
property and others being without it ?” 

“ Because those who are the strongest have deprived those 
who are weaker.” 

“ But would not that be always the case, even if we were 

2 * 


34 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


in that state of general inheritance which you have supposed 
For instance, allowing two men to chase the same animal, and 
both to come up to it at the same time, would not the strong- 
est bear it off ?” 

“ I grant that, sir.” 

“ Well, then, where is your equality ?” 

“ That does not disprove that men were not intended to be 
equal ; it only proves that they are not so. Neither does it 
disprove that everything was not made for the benefit of all ; 
it only proves that the strong will take advantage of the weak, 
which is very natural.” 

“ Oh ! you grant that to be very natural. Well, Mr. Easy, 
I am glad to perceive that we are of one mind, and I trust we 
shall continue so. You’ll observe that I and my keepers being 
three, we are the strong party in this instance, and admitting 
your argument, that the fish are as much yours as mine, still I 
take advantage of my strength to repossess myself of them, 
which is, as you say, very natural — James take those fish.” 

“If you please,” interrupted Jack, “we will argue that 
point ” 

“ Not at all ; I will act according to your own arguments — 
I have the fish, but I now mean to have more — that fishing-rod 
is as much mine as yours, and being the stronger party, I will 
take possession of it — James, William, take that fishing-rod — 
it is ours.” 

“ I presume you will first allow me to observe,” replied Jack, 
“ that although I have expressed my opinion that the earth 
and the animals on it were made for us all, that I never yet 
have asserted, that what man creates by himself, or has crea- 
ted for him for a consideration, is not his own property.” 

“ I beg your pardon ; the trees that that rod was made from 
were made for us all, and if you, or any one for you, have 
thought proper to make it into a rod, it is no more my fault 
than it is that I have been feeding the fish, with the supposi- 
tion that they were my own. Every thing being common, and 
t being but natural that the strong should take advantage of 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EAST. 


dO 

the weak, I must take that rod as my property, until I am dis- 
possessed by one more powerful. Moreover, being the stronger 
party, and having possession of this land, which you say does 
not belong to me more than to you — I also shall direct my 
keepers to see you off this property. James, take the rod, — 
see Mr. Easy over the park palings. Mr. Easy, I wish you a 
good morning.” 

“ Sir, I beg your pardon, you have not yet heard all my 
arguments,” replied Jack, who did not approve of the conclu- 
sions drawn. 

“ I have no time to hear more, Mr. Easy ; I wish you a good 
morning.” And the proprietor departed, leaving Jack in com- 
pany with the keepers. 

“ I’ll trouble you for that rod, master,” said William. James 
was very busy stringing the fish through the gills upon a piece 
of osier. 

“ At all events you will hear reason,” said Jack : “I have 
arguments ” 

“ I never heard no good arguments in favour of poaching,” 
interrupted the keeper. 

“ You’re an insolent fellow,” replied Jack. “ It is by paying 
such vagabonds as you that people are able to be guilty of 
injustice.” 

“ It’s by paying us that the land an’t poached — and if there 
be some excuse for a poor devil who is out of work, there be 
none for you, who call yourself a gentleman.” 

“ According to his ’count, as we be all equal, he be no more 
a gentleman than we be.” 

“ Silence, you blackguard, I shall not condescend to argue 
with such as you : if I did I could prove that you are a set of 
base slaves, who have just as much right to this property as 
your master or I have.” 

“ As you have, I dare say, master.” 

“ As I have, you scoundrel ; this pond is as much my pro- 
perty, and so are the fish in it, as they are of your master, who 
has usurped the right.” 


36 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


“ I say, James, what do yon say, shall we put the young 
gentleman in possession of his property ?” said William, wink- 
ing to the other. 

James took the hint, they seized Jack by the arms and legs, 
and soused him into the pond. Jack arose after a deep sub- 
mersion, and floundered on shore blowing and spluttering. But 
in the mean time the keepers had walked away, carrying with 
them the rod and line, fish, and tin-can of bait, laughing loudly 
at the practical joke which they had played our hero. 

“ Well,” thought Jack, “ either here must be some mistake 
in my father’s philosophy, or else this is a very wicked world. 
I shall submit this case to my father.” 

And Jack received this reply — “ I have told you before, 
Jack, that these important truths will not at present be admit- 
ted — but it does not the less follow that they are true. This 
is the age of iron, in which might has become right— but the 
time will come when these truths will be admitted, and your 
father’s name will be more celebrated that than of any philoso- 
pher of ancient days. Kecollect, Jack, that although in preach- 
ing against wrong and advocating the rights of man, you will 
be treated as a martyr, it is still your duty to persevere ; and 
if you are dragged through all the horse-ponds in the kingdom, 
never give up your argument.” 

“ That I never will, sir,” replied Jack ; “ but the next time 
I argue it shall be, if possible, with power on my side, and, at 
all events, not quite so near a pond.” 

“ 1 think,” said Mrs. Easy, who had been a silent listener, 
“ that Jack had better fish in the river, and then, if he catches 
no fish, at all events he will not be soused in the water, and 
spoil his clothes.” 

But Mrs. Easy was no philosopher. 

A few days afterwards, Jack discovered, one fine morning, 
on the other side of a hedge, a summer apple-tree bearing 
tempting fruit, and he immediately broke through the hedge, 
and climbing the tree, as our first mother did before him, he 
2 ulled the fairest and did eat. 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


31 


“ I say, you sir, what are you doing there ?” cried a rough 
voice. 

Jack looked down, and perceived a stout, thickset personage 
in grey coat and red waistcoat, standing underneath him, 

“ Don’t you see what I’m about,” replied Jack, “ I’m eating 
apples,— shall I throw you down a few ?” 

“ Thank you kindly — the fewer that are pulled the better ; 
perhaps, as you are so free to give them to others as well 
as to help yourself, you may think that they are your own 
property !” 

“Not a bit more my property than they are yours, my good 
man.” 

“ I guess that’s something like the truth ; but you are not 
quite at the truth yet, my lad ; those apples are mine, and I’ll 
trouble you to come down as fast as you please ; when you’re 
down we can then settle our accounts ; and,” continued the 
man, shaking his cudgel, “ depend upon it, you shall have your 
receipt in full.” 

Jack did not much like the appearance of things. 

“ My good man,” said he, “it is quite a prejudice on your 
part to imagine that apples were not given, as well as all other 
fruit, for the benefit of us all — they are common property, 
believe me.” 

“ That’s a matter of opinion, my lad, and I may be allowed 
to have my own.” 

“ You’ll find it in the Bible,” says Jack. 

“ I never did yet, and I’ve read it through and through all, 
bating the ’Pocryfar.” 

“ Then,” said Jack, “ go home and fetch the Bible, and I’ll 
- prove it to you.” 

“ I suspect you’ll not wait till I come back again. No, no ; 
I have lost plenty of apples, and have long wanted to find tho 
robbers out ; now I’ve caught one I’ll take care that he don’t 
*scape without apple-sauce, at all events — so come down, you 
young thief, come down directly — or it will be all the worse for 
vou ” 


88 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


“ Thank you,” said Jack, “ but I am very well here. I will, 
if you please, argue the point from where I am.” 

“ I’ve no time to argue the point, my lad ; I’ve plenty to do, 
but do not think I’ll let you off. If you don’t choose to come 
down, why then you may stay there, and I’ll answer for it, as 
soon as work is done I shall find you safe enough.” 

“ What can be done,” thought Jack, “ with a man who 
will not listen to argument ? What a world is this 1 — 
however, he’ll not find me here when he comes back, I’ve 
a notion.” 

But in this Jack was mistaken. The farmer walked to the 
hedge, and called to a boy, who took his orders and ran to the 
farm house. In a minute or two a large bulldog was seen 
bounding along the orchard to his master. “ Mark him, 
Caesar,” said the farmer to the dog, “mark him.” The dog 
crouched down on the grass, with his head up, and eyes glaring 
at Jack, showing a range of teeth, that drove all our hero’s 
philosophy out of his head. 

“ I can’t wait here, but Caesar can, and I will tell you, as a 
friend, that if he gets hold of you, he’ll not leave a limb of you 
together, — when work’s done I’ll come back so saying, the 
farmer walked off, leaving Jack and the dog to argue the point, 
if so inclined. What a sad jade must philosophy be, to put her 
votaries in such predicaments ! 

After a while the dog laid his head down and closed his eyes, 
as if asleep, but Jack observed, that at the least movement on 
his part one eye was seen to partially unclose ; so Jack, like a 
prudent man, resolved to remain where he was. He picked a 
few more apples, for it was his dinner-time, and as he chewed 
he ruminated. 

Jack had been but a few minutes ruminating before he was 
interrupted by another ruminating animal, no less a personage 
than a bull, who had been turned out with full possession of the 
orchard, and who now advanced, bellowing occasionally, and 
tossing his head at the sight of Caesar, whom he considered as 
much a trespasser as his master had our hero. Caesar started 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


39 


on his legs and faced the bull, who advanced pawing, with his 
tail up in the air. When within a few yards the bull made a 
rush at the dog, who evaded him and attacked him in return, 
and thus did the warfare continue until the opponents were 
already at some distance from the apple tree. Jack prepared 
for immediate flight, but unfortunately the combat was carried 
on by the side of the hedge at which Jack had gained admis- 
sion. Never mind, thought Jack, there are two sides to every 
field, and although the other hedge joined on to the garden 
near to the farm house, there was no option. “At all events,” 
said Jack, “ Pll try it.” Jack was slipping down the trunk, 
when he beard a tremendous roar ; the bull-dog had been tossed 
by the bull ; he was then high in the air, and Jack saw him 
fall on the other side of the hedge ; and the bull was thus 
celebrating his victory with a flourish of trumpets. Upon 
which Jack, perceiving that he was relieved from his sentry, 
slipped down the rest of the tree and took to his heels. Unfor- 
tunately for J ack, the bull saw hiip, and, flushed with victory, 
he immediately set up another roar, and bounded after Jack. 
Jack perceived his danger, and fear gave him wings ; he not 
only flew over the orchard, but he flew over the hedge, which 
■was about five feet high, just as the bull drove his head into it. 
Look before you leap, is an old proverb. Had Jack done so, 
he would have done better ; but as there were cogent reasons 
to be offered in extenuation of our philosopher, we shall say no 
more, but merely state that Jack, when he got on the other 
side of the hedge, found that he had pitched into a small 
apiary, and had upset two hives of bees, who resented the 
intrusion ; and Jack had hardly time to get upon his legs 
before he found them very busy stinging him in all quarters. 
All that Jack could do, was to run for it, but the bees flew 
faster than he could run, and Jack was mad with pain, when 
he stumbled, half-blinded, over the brick work of a well. Jack 
could not stop his pitching into the well, but he seized the iron 
chain as it struck him across the face. Down went Jack, and 
round went the windlass, and after a rapid descent of forty 


40 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


feet our hero found himself under water, and no longer troubled 
with the bees, who, whether they had lost scent of their prey 
from his rapid descent, or being notoriously clever insects, 
acknowledged the truth of the adage, “ leave well alone,” had 
certainly left Jack with no other companion than Truth. Jack 
rose from his immersion, and seized the rope to which the chain 
of the bucket was made fast — it had all of it been unwound 
from the windlass, and therefore it enabled Jack to keep his 
head above water. After a few seconds Jack felt something 
against his legs, it was the bucket, about two feet under the 
water ; Jack put his feet into it and found himself pretty com- 
fortable, for the water, after the sting of the bees and the heat 
he had been put into by the race with the bull, was quite cool 
and refreshing. 

“At all events,” thought Jack, “if it had not been for the 
bull, I should have been watched by the dog, and then thrash- 
ed by the farmer ; but then again, if it had not been for the 
bull, I should not have tumbled among the bees ; and if it had 
not been for the bees, I should not have tumbled into the well; 
and if it had not been for the chain, I should have been 
drowned. Such has been the chain of events, all because I 
wanted to eat an apple. 

“ However, I have got rid of the farmer, and the dog, and 
the bull, and the bees — all’s well that ends well ; but how the 
devil am I to get out of the well ? — All creation appear to have 
conspired against the rights of man. As my father said, this 
is an iron age, and here I am swinging to an iron chain.” 

We have given the whole of Jack’s soliloquy, as it will prove 
that Jack was no fool, although he was a bit of a philosopher; 
and a man who could reason so well upon cause and effect, at 
the bottom of a well, up to his neck in water, showed a good 
deal of presence of mind. But if Jack’s mind had been a little 
twisted by his father’s philosophy, it had still sufficient strength 
and elasticity to recover itself in due time. Had Jack been a 
common personage, we should never have selected him for our 
hero. 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EAST. 


41 


CHAPTER VII. 

IN WHICH JACK MAKES SOME VERY SAGE REFLECTIONS, AND COMES 
TO A VERY UNWISE DECISION. 

After all, it must be acknowledged that although there are 
cases of distress in which a well may become a place of refuge, 
a well is not at all calculated for a prolonged residence — so 
thought Jack. After he had been there some fifteen minutes, 
his teeth chattered, and his limbs trembled ; he felt a numb* 
ness all over, and he thought it high time to call for assistance, 
which at first he would not, as he was afraid he should be 
pulled up to encounter the indignation of the farmer and his 
family. J ack was arranging his jaws for a halloo, when he 
felt the chain pulled up, and he slowly emerged from the 
water. At first he heard complaints of the weight of the 
bucket, at which Jack was not surprised, then he heard a 
tittering and laughing between two parties, and soon after- 
wards he mounted up gaily. At last his head appeared above 
the low wall, and he was about to extend his arms so as to 
secure a position on it, when those who were working at the 
windlass beheld him. It was a heavy farming man and a maid 
servant. 

“ Thank you,” said J ack. 

One never should be too quick in returning thanks j the girl 
screamed and let go the winch, the man, frightened, did not 
hold it fast ; it slipped from his grasp, whirled round, struck 
him under the chin and threw him over it headlong, and before 
the “Thank you” was fairly out of Jack’s lips, down he went 
again like lightning to the bottom. Fortunately for Jack, he 
had not yet let go the chain, or he might have struck the 
sides and have been killed ; as it was, he was merely soused a 
second time, and in a minute or two regained his former posi- 
tion. 

“This is mighty pleasant,” thought Jack, as he clapped his 


42 


MB. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


wet hat once more on his head ; “at all events, they can’t 
now plead ignorance, they must know that I’m here.” 

In the mean time the girl ran into the kitchen, threw herself 
down on a stool, from which she reeled off in a fit upon sundry 
heaps of dough waiting to be baked in the oven, which were 
laid to rise on the floor before the fire. 

“ Mercy on me, what is the matter with Susan ?” exclaimed 
the farmer’s wife. “ Here — where’s Mary — where’s John ? — 
Deary me, if the bread won’t all be turned to pancakes.” 

John soon followed, holding his under-jaw in his hand, look- 
ing very dismal and very frightened, for two reasons ; one, 
because he thought that his jaw was broken, and the other 
because he thought that he had seen the devil. 

“ Mercy on us, what is the matter ?” exclaimed the farmer’s 
wife again. “ Mary, Mary, Mary !” screamed she, beginning 
to be frightened herself, for with all her efforts she could not 
remove Susan from the bed of dough, where she lay senseless 
and heavy as lead. Mary answered to her mistress’s loud 
appeal, and with her assistance they raised up Susan ; but as 
for the bread, there was no hopes of it ever rising again. 
“ Why don’t you come here and help Susan, John ?” cried Mary. 

“Aw-yaw-aw!” was all the reply of John, who had had 
enough quite of helping Susan, and who continued to hold his 
head, as it were, in his hand. 

“What’s the matter here, missus ?” exclaimed the farmer, 
coming in. “ Highty-tighty, what ails Susan, and what ails 
you ?” continued the farmer, turning to John. “ Dang it, but 
everything seems to go wrong this blessed day. First there be 
all the apples stolen — then there be all the hives turned topsy- 
turvy in the garden, — then there be Caesar with his flank 
opened by the bull, — then there be the bull broken through 
the hedge and tumbled into the saw-pit, — and now I come to 
get more help to drag him out, I find one woman dead like, 
and John looks as if he had seen the devil.” 

“ Aw-yaw-aw !” replied John, nodding his head very signifi 
cantly. 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


43 


. “ One would think that the devil had broke loose to-day. 

What is it, John ? Have you seen him, and has Susan seen 
him ?” 

“ Aw-yaw.” 

“ He’s stopped your jaw, then, at all events, and I thought 
the devil himself wouldn’t have done that — we shall get nothing 
of you. Is that wench coming to her senses ?” 

“ Yes, yes, she’s better now. Susan what’s the matter ?” 

“ Oh, oh, ma’am ! the well, the well ” 

“ The well ! Something wrong there, I suppose : well, I 
will go and see.” 

The farmer trotted off to the well ; he perceived the bucket 
was at the bottom and all the rope out ; he looked about him, 
and then he looked into the well. Jack, who had become very 
impatient, had been looking up some time for the assistance 
which he expected would have come sooner ; the round face of 
the farmer occasioned a partial eclipse of the round disk which 
bounded his view, just as one of the satellites of Jupiter 
sometimes obscures the face of the planet round which he 
revoives. 

“ Here I am,” cried Jack, “ get me up quick, or I shall be 
dead and what Jack said was true, for he was quite done 
up by having been so long down, although his courage had not 
failed him. 

“Dang it, but there be somebody fallen into the well,” cried 
the farmer ; “no end to mishaps this day. Well, we must 
get a Christian out of a well afore we get a bull out of a saw- 
jut, so I’ll go call the men.” 

In a very short time, the men who were assembled round the 
sawpit were brought to the well. 

“ Down below there, hold on now.” 

“ Never fear,” cried Jack. 

Away went the winch, and once more Jack had an extended 
horizon to survey. As soon as he was at the top, the men 
hauled him over the bricks and laid him down upon the ground, 
for Jack’s strength had failed him. 


44 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


“ Dang it,, if it bean’t that chap who was on my apple-tree,” , 
cried the farmer — “ howsomever, he must not die for stealing 
a few apples ; lift him up, lads, and take him in — he is dead 
with cold — no wonder.” 

The farmer led the way, and the men carried Jack into the 
house, when the farmer gave him a glass of brandy ; this 
restored Jack’s circulation, and in a short time he was all right 
again. 

After some previous conversation, in which Jack narrated 
all that had happened, “ What may be your name ?” inquired 
the farmer. 

“ My name is Easy,” replied Jack. 

“ What, be you the son of Mr. Easy, of Forest Hill ?” 

“ Yes.” 

“ Dang it, he be my landlord, and a right good landlord 
too — why didn’t you say so when you were up in the apple- 
tree ? You might have picked the whole orchard and 
welcome.” 

“ My dear sir,” replied Jack, who had taken a second glass 
of brandy, and was quite talkative again, “let this be a 
warning to you, and when a man proposes to argue the point, 
always, in future, listen. Had you waited, I would have 
proved to you most incontestably that you had no more right 
to the apples than I had ; but you would not listen to argu- 
ment, and without discussion we can never arrive at truth. 
You send for your dog, who is ripped up by the bull — the bull 
breaks his leg in a sawpit — the beehives are overturned and 
you lose all your honey — your man John breaks his jaw — your 
maid Susan spoils the bread — and why? because you would not 
allow me to argue the point.” 

“ Well, Mr. Easy, it be all true that all these mishaps have 
happened because I would not allow you to argue the point, 
perhaps, although, as I rent the orchard from your father, I 
cannot imagine how you could have proved to me that the 
apples were not mine ; but now, let’s take your side of the 
question, and I don’t see how you be much better off — you get 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


45 


up in a tree for a few apples, with plenty of money to buy 
them if you like — you are kept there by a dog — you are nearly 
gored by a bull — you are stung by the bees, and you tumble 
souse into a well, and are nearly killed a dozen times, and all 
for a few apples not worth two-pence.” 

“All very true, my good man,” replied Jack ; “but you 
forget that I, as a philosopher, was defending the rights of man.” 

“ Well, I never knew before that a lad who stole apples was 
called a philosopher— we calls it petty larceny in the indict- 
ments ; and as for your rights of man, I cannot see how they 
can be defended by doing what’s wrong.” 

“ You do not comprehend the matter, farmer.” 

“ No, I don’t — and I be too old to learn, Master Easy. All 
I have to say is this, you are welcome to all the apples in the 
orchard, if you- please, and if you prefers, as it seems you do, 
to steal them, instead of asking for them, which I only can 
account for by the reason that they say that 1 stolen fruit be 
sweetest,’ I’ve only to say that I shall give orders that you be 
not interfered with. My chaise be at the door, Master Easy, 
and the man will drive you to your father’s — make my com- 
pliments to him, and say, that I’m very sorry that you tumbled 
into our well.” 

As Jack was much more inclined for bed than argument, 
he wished the farmer good night, and allowed himself to be 
driven home. 

The pain from the sting of the bees, now that his circulation 
had fully returned, was so great, that he was not sorry to find 
Dr. Middleton taking his tea with his father and mother. 
Jack merely said that he had been so unfortunate as to upset 
a hive, and had been severely stung. He deferred the whole 
story till another opportunity. Dr. Middleton prescribed for 
Jack, but on taking his hand, found that he was in a high 
fever, which, after the events of the day, was not to be 
wondered at. Jack was bled, and kept his bed for a week, by 
which time he was restored ; but during that time, Jack had 
been thinking very seriously, and had made up his mind. 


46 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


But we must explain a circumstance which had occurred 
which was probably the cause of Jack’s decision. When Jack 
returned on the evening in question, he found seated with his 
father and Dr. Middleton, a Captain Wilson, a sort of cousin 
to the family, who but occasionally paid them a visit, for he 
lived at some distance ; and having a wife and large family, 
with nothing but his half-pay for their support, he could not 
afford to expend even shoe-leather in compliments. The object 
of this visit on the part of Captain Wilson was to request the 
aid of Mr. Easy. He had succeeded in obtaining his appoint- 
ment to a sloop-of-war (for he was in the king’s service), but 
was without the means of fitting himself out, without leaving 
his wife and family pennyless. He therefore came to request 
Mr. Easy to lend him a few hundred pounds, until he should be 
able, by his prize-money, to repay them. Mr. Easy was not a 
man to refuse such a request, and, always having plenty of 
spare cash at his banker’s, he drew a check for a thousand 
pounds, which he gave to Captain Wilson, requesting that he 
would only repay it at his convenience. Captain Wilson wrote 
an acknowledgment of the debt, promising to pay upon his first 
prize-money, which receipt, however binding it may be to a 
man of honour, was, in point of law, about as valuable as if he 
had agreed to pay as soon “ as the cows came home.” The 
affair had been just concluded, and Captain Wilson had 
returned into the parlour with Mr. Easy, when Jack returned 
from his expedition. 

Jack greeted Captain Wilson, whom he had long known ; 
but, as we before observed, he suffered so much pain, that he 
soon retired with Dr. Middleton, and went to bed. 

During a week, there is room for much reflection, even, in a 
lad of fourteen, although at that age we are not much inclined 
to think. But Jack was in bed ; his eyes were so swollen with 
the stings of the bees that he could neither read nor otherwise 
amuse himself ; and he preferred his own thoughts to the gabble 
of Sarah, who attended him ; so Jack thought, and the result 
of his cogitations we shall soon bring forward. 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


47 


It was on the eighth day that Jack left his bed, and came 
down into the drawing-room. He then detailed to his father 
the adventures which had taken place, which had obliged him 
to take to his bed. 

“ You see, Jack,” replied his father, “it’s just what I told 
you : the world is so utterly demoralised by what is called 
social compact, and the phalanx supporting it by contributing 
a portion of their unjust possessions for the security of the 
remainder, is so powerful, that any one who opposes it, must 
expect to pass the life of a martyr ; but martyrs are always 
required previous to any truth, hQwever sublime, being received, 
and, like Abraham, whom I have always considered as a great 
philosopher, I am willing to sacrifice my only son in so noble a 
cause.” 

“ That’s all very good on your part, father, but we must 
argue the point a little. If you are as great a philosopher as 
Abraham, I am not quite so dutiful a son as Isaac, whose 
blind obedience, in my opinion, is very contrary to your rights 
of man ; but the fact, in few words, is simply this : in promul- 
gating your philosophy, in the short space of two days, I have 
been robbed of the fish I caught, and my rod and line — I 
have been soused into a fish-pond — I have been frightened out 
of my wits by a bull-dog — been nearly killed by a bull — been 
stung to death by bees, and twice tumbled into a well. Now, 
if all that happens in two days, what must I expect to suffer 
in a whole year ? It appears to be very unwise to attempt 
making further converts, for people on shore seem determined 
not to listen to reason or argument. But it has occurred to 
me, that although the whole earth has been so nefariously 
divided among the few, that the waters at least are the pro- 
perty of all. No man claims his share of the sea — every one 
may there plough as he pleases, without being taken up as a 
trespasser. Even war makes no difference ; every one may go 
on as he pleases, and if they meet, it is nothing but a neutral 
ground, on which the parties contend. It is, then, only upon 
the ocean that I am likely to find thgt equality and rights of 


48 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


man, which we are so anxious to establish on shore; and there- 
fore I have resolved not to go to school again, which I detest, 
but to go to sea, and propagate our opinions as much as I 
can.” 

“ I cannot listen to that, J ack. In the first place, you 
must return to school ; in the next place, you shall not go to 
sea.” * 

“ Then, father, all I have to say is, that I swear by the 
rights of man, I will not go back to school, and that I will go 
to sea. Who and what is to prevent me ? Was not I born 
my own master ? — has any one a right to dictate to me as if I 
were not his equal ? Have I not as much right to my share 
of the sea as any other mortal ? I stand upon perfect 
equality,” continued Jack, stamping his right foot on the 
floor. 

What had Mr. Easy to offer in reply ? He must either, as 
a philosopher, have sacrificed his hypothesis, or, as a father, 
have sacrificed his son. Like all philosophers, he preferred 
what he considered as the less important of the two, ho 
sacrificed his son ; but — we will do him justice — he did it with 
a sigh. 

“ Jack, you shall, if you wish it, go to sea.” 

“ That, of course,” replied Jack, with the air of a conqueror, 
“ but the question is, with whom ? Now it has occurred to me, 
that Captain Wilson has just been appointed to a ship, and I 
should like to sail with him.” 

“ I will write to him,” said Mr. Easy, mournfully ; “ but I 
should have liked to have felt his head first;” and thus was the 
matter arranged. 

The answer from Captain Wilson was, of course, in the 
affirmative, and he promised that he would treat Jack as his 
own son. 

Our hero mounted his fathers horse, and rode off to Mr. 
Bonnycastle. 

“Iam going to sea, Mr. Bonnycastle.” 

“ The very best thing for you,” replied Mr. Bonnycastle. 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


49 


Our hero met Dr. Middleton. 

“ I am going to sea, Dr. Middleton.” 

“ The very best thing for you,” replied the doctor. 

“Iam going to sea, mother,” said John. 

“ To sea, John, to sea? no, no, dear John, you are not 
going to sea,” replied Mrs. Easy, with horror. 

“Yes, I am ; father has agreed, and says he will obtain 
your consent.” 

“ My consent ! Oh, my dear, dear boy !”• — and Mrs. Easy 
wept bitterly, as Rachel mourning for her children. 


CHAPTER VIII. 

IN WHICH MR. EASY HAS HIS FIRST LESSON AS TO ZEAL IN HIS 

majesty’s service. 

As there was no time to lose, our hero very soon bade adieu to 
his paternal roof, as the phrase is, and found his way down to 
Portsmouth As Jack had plenty of money, and was very 
much pleased at finding himself his own master, he was in no 
hurry to join his ship, and five or six companions not very cred- 
itable, whom either Jack had picked up, or had picked up 
Jack, and who lived upon him, strongly advised him to put it 
off until the very last moment. As this advice happened to coin- 
cide with Jack’s opinion, our hero was three weeks at Ports- 
mouth before any one knew of his arrival; but at last Captain 
Wilson received a letter from Mr. Easy, by which he found that 
Jack had left home at the period we have mentioned, and he 
desired the first lieutenant to make inquiries, as he was afraid 
that some accident might have happened to him. As Mr. 
Sawbridge, the first lieutenant, happened to be going on shore 
on the same evening for the last time previous to the ship’s 
sailing, he looked into the Blue Posts, George, and Fountain 

3 


50 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


Inns, to inquire if there was such a person arrived as Mr. Easy. 
“ 0 yes,” replied the waiter at the Fountain, “ Mr. Easy has 
been here these three weeks.” 

“The devil he has,” roared Mr. Sawbridge, with all the in-, 
dignation of a first lieutenant defrauded three weeks of a mid- 
shipman; “ where is he; in the coffee-room *” 

0 “ Oh dear no sir,” replied the waiter, “ Mr. Easy has the 
front apartments on the first floor.” 

“Well, then, show me up to the first floor.” 

“ May I request the pleasure of your name, Sir ?” said the 
waiter. 

“First lieutenants don’t send up their names to midship- 
men,” replied Mr. Sawbridge; “ he shall soon know who I am.” 

At this reply, the waiter walked up stairs, followed by Mr. 
Sawbridge, and threw open the door. 

“ A gentleman wishes to see you,” said the waiter. 

“ Desire him to walk in,” said Jack : “ and, waiter, mind 
that the punch is a little better than it was yesterday; I have 
asked two more gentlemen to dine here.” 

In the meantime Mr. Sawbridge, who was not in his uniform, 
had entered, and perceived Jack alone, with the dinner table 
laid out in the best style for eight, a considerable show of plate 
for even the Fountain Inn, and everything, as well as the apart- 
ment itself, according to Mr. Sawbridge’s opinion, much more 
fit for a commander-in-chief than a midshipman cf r sloop of 
war. 

Now, Mr. Sawbridge was a good officer, one who had really 
worked his way up to the present rank, that is to say, that he 
had served seven-and-twenty years, and had nothing but his 
pay. He was a little soured in the service, and certainly had 
an aversion to the young men of family who were now fast 
crowding into it — and with some grounds, as he perceived his 
own chance of promotion decrease in the same ratio as the num- 
bers increased. He considered that in proportion as midship- 
men assumed a cleaner and more gentlemanly appearance, so 
did they become more useless, and it may therefore be easil)' 


MR MIDSHIPMAN EASY, 


51 


imagined that his bile was raised by this parade and display in 
a lad, who was very shortly to be, and ought three weeks be- 
fore to have been, shrinking from his frown. Nevertheless, 
Sawbridge was a good-hearted man, although a little envious 
of luxury, which he could not pretend to indulge in himself. 

“ May I beg to ask,” said Jack, who was always remarkably 
polite and gentlemanly in his address, “ in what manner I may 
be of service to you ?” 

“ Yes, sir, you may — by joining your ship immediately. 
And may I beg to ask in return, sir, what is the reason you 
have staid on shore three weeks without joining her ?” 

Hereupon Jack, who did not much* admire the peremptory 
tone of Mr. Sawbridge, and who, during the answer, had taken 
a seat, crossed his legs, and played with the gold chain to 
which his watch was secured, after a pause very coolly re- 
plied, — 

“ And pray, who are you ?” 

“ Who am I, sir ?” replied Sawbridge, jumping out of hia 
chair; “ my name is Sawbridge, sir, and I am the first lieutenant 
of the Harpy. Now, sir, you have your answer.” 

Mr. Sawbridge, who imagined that the name of the first 
lieutenant would strike terror to a culprit midshipman, threw 
himself back in the chair, and assumed an air of importance. 

“ Really, sir,” replied Jack, “ what may be your exact situa- 
tion on board, my ignorance of the service will not allow me 
to guess, but if I may judge from your behaviour, you have no 
small opinion of yourself.” 

“ Look ye, young man, you may not know what a first lieu- 
tenant is, and I take it for granted that you do not, by your 
behaviour; but depend upon it, Til let you know very soon. In 
the mean time, sir, I insist upon it that you go immediately 01 
board.” 

“ l’ m sorry that I cannot comply with your very moderate 
request,” replied Jack coolly. “ I shall go on board when it 
suits my convenience, and I beg that you will give yourself no 
further trouble on my account.” 


52 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


Jack then rang the bell; the waiter, who had been listening 
outside, immediately entered, and before Mr. Sawbridge, who 
was dumb with astonishment at Jack’s impertinence, could have 
time to reply, 

“ Waiter,” said Jack, “ show this gentleman down stairs.” 

“ By the god of war 1” exclaimed the first lieutenant, “ but 
I’ll soon show you down to the boat, my young bantam; and 
when once I get you safe on board, I’ll make you know the 
difference between a midshipman and a first lieutenant. 

“ I can only admit of equality, sir,” replied Jack; “ we are all 
born equal, — I trust you’ll allow that.” 

“ Equality — damn it, I suppose you’ll take the command of 
the ship. However, sir, your ignorance will be a little en- 
lightened by-and-bye. I shall now go and report your conduct 
to Captair; Wilson; and I tell you plainly, that if you are not 
on board this evening, to-morrow morning, at daylight, I shall 
send a sergeant and a file of marines to fetch you.” 

“You may depend upon it, sir,” replied Jack, “ that I also 
shall not fail to mention to Captain Wilson that I consider you 

very quarrelsome, impertinent fellow, and recommend him 
not to allow you to remain on board. It will be quite uncom- 
fortable to be in the same ship with such an ungentlemanly 
bear.” 

“He must be mad — quite mad,” exclaimed Sawbridge, 
whose astonishment even mastered his indignation. “ Mad as 
a March hare — by God.” 

“No, sir,” replied Jack, “I am not mad, but I am a philo- 
sopher.” 

“A whatV exclaimed Sawbridge, “ damme, what next ? — 
well, my joker, all the better for you, I shall put your philoso- 
phy to the proof.” 

“ It is for that very reason, sir,” replied Jack, “ that I have 
decided upon going to sea; and if you do remain on board, I 
hope to argue the point with you, and make you a convert to 
the truths of equality and the rights of man.” 

“ By the Lord that made us both, I’ll soon make you a con- 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY 


58 


vert to the thirty-six articles of war — that is, if you remain on 
board; but I shall now go to the captain and report your con- 
duct, sir, and leave you to your dinner with what appetite you 
may.” 

“ Sir, I am infinitely obliged to you ; but you need not be 
afraid of my appetite; I am only sorry, as you happen to be- 
long to the same ship, that I cannot, in justice to the gentle- 
manly young men whom I expect, ask you to join them. I 
wish you a very good morning, sir.” # 

“ Twenty years have I been in the service,” roared Saw- 

bridge, “and, damme but he’s mad — downright, stark, 

staring mad.” And the first lieutenant bounced out of the 
room. 

Jack was a little astonished himself. Had Mr. Sawbridge 
made his appearance in uniform it might have been different, 
but that a. plain-looking man, with black whiskers, shaggy 
hair, and old blue frock coat and yellow cassimere waistcoat, 
should venture to address him in such a manner, was quite in- 
comprehensible. He calls me mad, thought Jack, I shall tell 
Captain Wilson what is my opinion about his lieutenant. 
Shortly afterwards the company arrived, and Jack soon forgot 
all about it. 

In the mean time, Sawbridge called at the captain’s lodgings, 
and found him at home: he made a very faithful report of all 
that had happened, and concluded his request by demanding, in 
great wrath, either an instant dismissal or a court-martial on 
our hero, Jack. 

“ Stop, Sawbridge,” replied Captain Wilson, “ take a chair: 
as Mr. Easy says, we must argue the point, and then I will 
leave it to your better feelings. As for the court-martial, it 
will not hold good, for Mr. Easy, in the first place, has not yet 
joined the ship, and in the next place, could not be supposed 
to know that you w^re the first-lieutenant, or even an officer, 
for you went to him out of uniform.” 

“ Very true, sir,” replied Sawbridge, “ I had forgotten that.” 

“ Then, as foi his dismissal, or rather, not allowing him to 


54 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


join, Mr. Easy has been brought up in the country, and has 
never seen anything aquatic larger than a fish pond, perhaps, in 
his life; and as for the service, or the nature of it* I believe he is 
as ignorant of it-as a child not a year old — I doubt whether he 
knows the rank of a lieutenant ; certainly, he can have no idea 
of the power of a first-lieutenant, by his treatment of you.” 

“ I should think not,” replied Sawbridge, dryly. 

“ I do not think, therefore, that conduct which must have 
proceed from s^eer ignorance, should be so severely punished — 
I appeal to you, Sawbridge.” 

“ Well, sir, perhaps you are right — but still he told me he 
was a philosopher, and talked about equality and rights of 
man. Told me that he could only admit of equality between 
us, and begged to argue the point. Now, sir, if a midshipman 
is to argue the point every time that an order is given, the 
service will come to a pretty pass.” 

“ That is all very true, Sawbridge ; and now you remind 
me of what never occurred to me at the time that I promised 
to take Mr. Easy in the ship. I now recollect that his father, 
who is a distant relation of mine, has some very wild notions 
injiis head, just like what have been repeated by his son on 
your interview with him. I have occasionally dined there, and 
Mr. Easy has always been unholding the principles of natural 
equality and of the rights of man, much to the amusement of 
his guests, and I confess, at the time, of mine also. I recollect 
telling him that I trusted he would never be able to dissemi- 
nate his opinions in the service to which I belonged, as we 
should have an end of all discipline. I little thought, at the 
time, that his only son, who has no more occasion to go to sea 
than the archbishop of Canterbury, for his father has a very 
handsome property — I believe seven or eight thousand a year 
— would ever have sailed with me, and have brought these 
opinions with him into any ship that I commanded. It is a 
pity, a great pity ” 

“ He never could have brought his pigs to a worse market,” 
observed Sawbridge. 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


55 


“ I agree with you, and, as a father myself, I cannot but 
help feeling how careful we should be, how we inculcate anj 
thing like abstract and philosophical ideas to youth. Allowing 
them to be in themselves correct, still they are dangerous as 
sharp instruments aro in the hands of a child : allowing them 
to be erroneous, they are seized upon with an avidity by young 
and ardent minds, and are not to be eradicated without the 
greatest difficulty, and very often not until they have accom- 
plished their ruin.” 

“ Then you think, sir, that these ideas have taken deep root 
in this young man, and we shall not easily rid him of them.” 

“ I do not say so ; but still, recollect they have been in- 
stilled, perhaps, from the earliest period, by one from whom 
they must have been received with all confidence — from a fa- 
ther to a" son ; and that son has never yet been sufficiently in 
the world to have proved their fallacy.” 

“ Well, sir,” replied Sawbridge, “if I may venture to offer 
an opinion on the subject — and in so doing I assure you that I 
only shall from a feeling for the service, — if, as you say, these 
opinions will not easily be eradicated, as the young man is 
independent, would it not be both better for himself, as well as 
for the service, that he is sent home again ? As an officer he will 
never do any good for himself, and he may do much harm to 
others. I submit this to you, Captain Wilson, with all respect; 
but as your first-lieutenant, I feel very jealous at any chance of 
the discipline of the ship being interfered with by the introduc- 
tion of this young man, to whom it appears that a profession is 
no object.” 

“ My dear Sawbridge,” replied Captain Wilson, after taking 
one or two turns up and down the* room, “we entered the ser- 
vice together, we were messmates for many years, and you 
must be aware that it is not only long friendship but an inti- 
mate knowledge of your unrewarded merit, which has induced 
me to request you to come with me as my first-lieutenant. 
Now, I will put a case to you, and you shall Ahen decide the 
question — and moreover, I will abide by your decision. 


56 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY". 


“ Suppose that you were a commander like myself, with a 
wife and seven children, and that, struggling for many years to 
support them, you found yourself, notwithstanding the utmost 
parsimony, gradually running into debt. That, after many 
long applications, you had at last succeeded in obtaining em- 
ployment by an appointment to a fine sloop, and there was 
every prospect, by prize-money and increased pay, of recovering 
yourself from your difficulties, if not realising a sufficient provi- 
sion for your family. Then suppose that all this prospect and 
all these hopes were likely to be dashed to the ground by the 
fact of having no means of fitting yourself out, no credit, no 
means of paying debts you have contracted, for which you 
would have been arrested, or any thing sufficient to leave for 
the support of your family during your absence, your agent onl) 
consenting to advance one half of what you require. Now, 
suppose, in this awkward dilemma, without* any one in this 
world upon whom you have any legitimate claim, as a last 
resource you were to apply to one with whom you have but a dis- 
tant connection, and but an occasional acquaintance — and that 
when you had made your request for the loan of two or three 
hundred pounds, fully anticipating a refusal (from the feeling 
that he who goes a borrowing goes a sorrowing) — I say, sup- 
pose, to your astonishment, that this generous person was to 
present you with a cheque on his banker for one thousand 
pounds, demanding no interest, no legal security, and requests 
you only to pay it at your convenience, — I ask you, Sawbridge, 
what would be your feelings towards such a man ?” 

a I would die for him,” replied Sawbridge, with emotion. 

“ And suppose, that, by the merest chance, or from a whim 
of the moment, the son of that man was to be placed under 
your protection ?” 

“ I would be a father to him,” replied Sawbridge. 

“ But we must proceed a little further : suppose that you 
were to find the lad was not all that you could wish, — that he 
nad imbibed erroneous doctrines, which would probably, if not 
eradicated, be attended with consequences fatal to his welfare 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


51 

and happiness, would you therefore, on that account, withdraw 
your protection, and leave him to the mercy of others, who had 
no claims of gratitude to sway them in his favour ?” 

“ Most certainly not, sir,” replied Sawbridge : “on the con- 
trary, I would nevei part with the son until, by precept or 
otherwise, I had set him right again, and thus had, as far as 
it was possible, paid the debt of gratitude due to the generous 
father.” 

“ I hardly need say to you, Sawbridge, after what has passed, 
that this lad you have just come from, is the son, and that Mr, 
Easy of Forest Hill is the father.” 

“ Then, sir, I can only say, that not only to please you, but 
also from respect to a man who has shown such goodwill 
towards one of our cloth, I shall most cheerfully forgive all 
that has passed between the lad and me, and all that may pro- 
babjy take place before we make him what he ought to be.” 

“ Thank you, Sawbridge ; I expected as much, and am not 
disappointed in my opinion of you.” 

“ And now, Captain Wilson, pray what is to be done ?” 

“We must get him on board, but not with a file of marines, 
— that will do more harm than good. I will send a note, 
requesting him to breakfast with me to-morrow morning, and 
have a little conversation with him. I do not wish to frighten 
him ; he would not scruple to run back to Forest Hill — now I 
wish to keep him if I possibly can.” 

“You are right, sir ; his father appears his greatest enemy. 
What a pity that a man with so good a heart should be so 
weak in the head ! Then, sir, I shall take no notice of this at 
present, but leave the whole affair in your hands.” 

“ Ho, Sawbridge ; you have obliged me very much by your 
‘kindness in this business.” 

Mr. Sawbridge then took his leave, and Captain Wilson des 
patched a note to our hero, requesting the pleasure of his com- 
pany to breakfast at nine o’clock the ensuing morning. The 
answer was in the affirmative, but verbal, for Jack had drunk 
too much champagne to trust his pen to paper. 

3 * 


58 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


CHAPTER IX. 

IN WHICH MR. EASY FINDS HIMSELF ON THE OTHER SIDE C? 'TT.'Jf S '1 
OF BISCAY. 

The next morning Jack Easy would have forgotten all aoui 
his engagement with the captain, had it not been for the 
waiter, who thought that, after the reception which our hero 
had given the first-lieutenant, it would be just as well that he 
should not be disrespectful to the captain. Now Jack had not, 
hitherto, put on his uniform, and he thought this a fitting 
occasion, particularly as the waiter suggested the propriety of 
his appearance in it. Whether it was from a presentiment of 
what he was to suffer, Jack was not at all pleased, as most 
lads are, with the change in his dress. It appeared to him fhat 
he was sacrificing his independence ; however, he did not follow 
his first impulse, which was, to take it off again, but took his 
hat, which the waiter had brushed and handed to him, and 
then set off for the captain’s lodgings. Captain Wilson received 
him as if he had not been aware of his delay in joining his ship, 
or his interview with his first-lieutenant, but before breakfast 
was over, Jack himself narrated the affair in a few words. Cap- 
tain Wilson then entered into a detail of the duties and rank 
of every person on board of the ship, pointing out to Jack, 
that where discipline was required, it was impossible, when 
duty was carried on, that more than one could command ; and 
that that one was the captain, who represented the king in per- 
son, who represented the country ; and that, as the orders were 
transmitted from the captain through the lieutenant, and from 
the lieutenant to the midshipmen, who, in their turn, commu-* 
nicated them to the whole ship’s company, in fact, it was the 
captain alone who gave the orders, and that every one was 
equally obliged to obey. Indeed, as the captain himself had to 
obey the orders of his superiors, the admiral and the admiralty j 
all on board might be said to be equally obliged to obey. Cap- 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


59 


tain Wilson laid a strong emphasis on the word equally, a$> he 
cautiously administered his first dose ; indeed, in the whole of 
his address, he made use of special pleading, which would have 
done credit to the bar ; for at the same time that he was 
explaining to Jack that he was entering a service in which 
equality could never for a moment exist, if the service was to 
exist, he contrived to show that all the grades were levelled, by 
all being equally bound to do their duty to their country, and 
that, in fact, whether a seaman obeyed his orders, or he obeyed 
the orders of his superior officer, they were in reality only obey- 
ing the orders of the country, which were administered through 
their channels. 

Jack did not altogether dislike this view of the subject, and 
the captain took care not to dwell too long upon it. He then 
entered upon other details, which he was aware would be more 
agreeable to Jack. He pointed out that the articles of war 
were the rules by which the service was to be guided, and that 
every body, from the captain to the least boy in the ship, was 
equally bound to adhere to them — that a certain allowance of 
pro-visions and wine were allowed to each person on board, and 
that this allowance was the same to all ; the same to the cap- 
tain as to the boy ; the same in quantity as in quality ; every 
one equally entitled to his allowance ; — that, although there 
were, of necessity, various grades necessary in the service, and 
the captain’s orders were obliged to be passed and obeyed by 
all, yet still, whatever was the grade of the officer, they were 
equally considered as gentlemen. In short, Captain Wilson, 
who told the truth, and nothing but the truth, without telling 
the whole truth, actually made Jr.ck fancy that he had at last 
found out that equality he had been seeking for in vain on 
shore, when, at last, he. recollected the language used by Mr 
Sawbridge the evening before, and asked the captain why that 
personage had so conducted himself. Now, as the language of 
Mr. Sawbridge was very much at variance with equality, Cap- 
tain Wilson was not a little puzzled. However, he first pointed 
out that the first-lieutenant was, at the time being, the captain. 


60 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


as he was the senior officer on board, as would J ack himself be 
if he were the senior officer on board ; and that, as he before 
observed, the captain or senior officer represented the country. 
That in the articles of war, every body who absented himself 
from the ship, committed an error, or breach of those articles ; 
and if any error or breach of those articles was committed by 
any one belonging to the ship, if the senior officer did not take 
notice of it, he then himself committed a breach of those 
articles, and was liable himself to be punished, if he could not 
prove that he had noticed it ; it was therefore to save himself 
that he was obliged to point out the error ; and if he did it in 
strong language, it only proved his zeal for his country. 

“ Upon my honour, then,” replied Jack, “ there can be no 
doubt of his zeal ; for if the whole country had been at stake, 
he could not have put himself in a greater passion.” 

“ Then he did his duty ; but depend upon it, it was not a 
pleasant one to him : and Pll answer for it, when you meet him 
on board, he will be as friendly with you as if nothing had hap- 
pened.” 

“ He told me that he'd soon make me know what a first- 
lieutenant was : what did he mean by that ?” inquired Jack. 

“ All zeal.” ' 

“ Yes, but he said, that as soon as he got on board, he'd 
show me the different between a first-lieutenant and a mid- 
shipman.” 

“ All zeal.” 

“ He said my ignorance should be a little enlightened T y-and. 
bye.” 

“ All zeal.” 

“ And that he’d send a sergeant and marines to fetch me.” 

“ All zeal.” 

“ That he would put my philosophy to the proof.” 

“ All zeal, Mr. Easy. Zeal will break out in this way ; but 
we should do nothing in the service without it. Recollect that 
I hope and trust one day to see you also a zealous officer.” 

Here Jack cogitated considerably, and give no answer. 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


61 


“ Yon will, I am sure,” continued Captain Wilson, “ find Mr 
Sawbridge one of your best friends.” 

“ Perhaps so,” replied Jack ^ 1 ‘ but I did not much admire 
our first acquaintance.” 

“ It will perhaps be your unpleasant duty to find as much 
fault yourself ; we are all equally bound to do our duty to our 
country. But, Mr. Easy, I sent for you to say that we shall 
sail to-morrow ; and, as I shall send my things off this after- 
noon by the launch, you had better send yours off also. At 
eight o’clock I shall go on board, and we can both go in the 
same boat.” 

To this Jack made no sort of ODjection, and having paid his 
bill at the Fountain, he sent his chest down to the boat by 
some of the crew who came up for it, and attended the sum- 
mons of the captain +o embark. By nine o’clock that evening, 
Mr. Jack Easy was safe on board his Majesty’s sloop Harpy. 

When Jack arrived on board, it was dark, and he did not 
know what to do with himself. The captain was received by 
the officers on deck, who took off their hats to salute him. The 
captain returned the salute, and so did Jack very politely, after 
which, the captain entered into conversation with the first- 
lieutenant, and for a while J ack was left to himself. It was too 
dark to distinguish faces, and to one who had never been on 
board of a ship, too dark to move, so Jack stood where he 
was, which was not far from the main bitts ; but he did not 
stay long ; the boat had been hooked on to the quarter davits, 
and the boat-swain had called out, — 

“ Set taut, my lads 1” 

And then w T ith the shrill whistle, and “ Away with her I” 
forward came galloping and bounding along, the men with the 
tackles ; and in the dark Jack was upset, and half a dozen 
marines fell upon him ; the men, who had no idea that an 
officer was floored among the others, were pleased at the joke, 
and continued to dance over those who were down, until they 
rolled themselves out of the way. Jack, who did not under- 
stand this, fared badly, and it was not till the calls piped belay, 


62 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


that he could recover his legs, after having been trampled up or 
by half the starboard watch, and the breath completely js.mtz.eu 
out of his body. Jack reeled to a carronade slide, > T hen the 
officers, who had been laughing at the lark as well as the mai, 
perceived his situation — among others, Mr. Sawbridge, the first- 
lieutenant. 

“ Are you hurt, Mr. Easy ?” said he kindly. 

“ A little,” replied Jack, catching his breath. 

“ You’ve had but a rough welcome,” replied the first- 
lieutenant, “but at certain times, on board ship, it is every 
man for himself, and God for us all. Harpur,” continued the 
first-lieutenant to the doctor, “ take Mr. Easy down in the gun- 
room with you, and I will be down myself as soon as I can. 
Where is Mr. Jolliffe ?” 

“ Here, sir,” replied Mr. Jolliffe, a . master’s mate, coming aft 
from the booms. 

“ There is a youngster come on board with the captain. 
Order one of the quarter-masters to get a hammock slung.” 

In the mean time Jack went down into the gun-room, where 
a glass of wine somewhat recovered him. He did not stay 
there long, nor did he venture to talk much. As soon as his 
hammock was ready, J ack was glad to go to bed — and as he 
was much bruised he was not disturbed the next morning till 
past nine o’clock. He then dressed himself, went on deck, 
found that the sloop was just clear of the Needles, that he felt 
very queer, then very sick, and was conducted by a marine 
down below, put into his hammock, where he remained during 
a gale of wind of three days, bewildered, confused, puzzled, and 
every minute knocking his head against the beams with the 
pitching and tossiDg of the sloop. 

“ And this is going to sea,” thought Jack; “ no wonder that 
no one interferes with another here, or talks about a trespass ; 
for I’m sure any one is welcome to my share of the ocean ; and 
if I once get on shore again, the devil may have my portion if 
tie chooses.” 

Captain Wilson and Mr. Sawbridge had both allowed Jack 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


63 


more leisure than most midshipmen, during his illness. By the 
time that the gale was over, the sloop was off Cape Finisterre. 
The next morning the sea was nearly down, and there was but 
a slight breeze on the waters? The comparative quiet of the 
night before had very much recovered our hero, and when the 
hammocks were piped up, he was accosted by Mr. Jolliffe, the 
master’s mate, who asked, “ whether he intended to rouse and 
bit, or whether he intended to sail to Gibraltar between his 
blankets.” 

Jack, who felt himself quite another person, turned out 
of his hammock and dressed himself. A marine had, by the 
captain’s orders, attended Jack during his illness, and this 
man came to his assistance, opened his chest, and brought him all 
which he required, or Jack would have been in a sad dilemma. 

Jack then inquired where he was to go, for he had not yet 
been in the midshipmen’s berth, although five days on board. 
The marine pointed it out to him, and Jack, who felt excessively 
nangry, crawled over and between chests, until he found him- 
self fairly in a hole infinitely inferior to the dog-kennels which 
received his father’s pointers. 

“ I’d not only give up the ocean,” thought Jack, “ and my 
share of it, but also my share of the Harpy, unto any one who 
fancies it. Equality enough here ! for every one appears equally 
miserably off.” 

As he thus gave vent to his thoughts, he perceived that 
there was another person in the berth — Mr. Jolliffe, the master’s 
mate, who had fixed his eye upon Jack, and to whom Jack 
returned the compliment. The first thing that J ack observed 
was, that Mr. Jolliffe was very deeply pockmarked, and that he 
had but one eye, and that was a piercer ; it appeared like a 
little ball of fire, and as if it reflected more light from the soli- 
tary candle than the candle gave. 

“ I don’t like your looks,” thought Jack, — “ we shall never 
be friends.” 

Bat here Jack Tell into the common error of judging by 
appearances, as will be proved hereafter. 


64 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


‘‘Pm glad to see you up again, youngster,” said JolliAe . 
“ you’ve been on your beam ends longer than usual, but those 
who are strongest suffer most — you made your mind up 
but late to come to sea. However, they say, 1 Better late 
than never.’ ” 

“ I feel very much inclined to argue the truth of that saying,” 
replied Jack ; “but it’s no use just now Pm terribly hungry 
— when shall I get some breakfast ?” 

“ To-morrow morning at half past eight,” replied Mr. Jolliffe. 
“ Breakfast for to-day has been over these two hours.” 

“ But must I then go without ?” 

“ No, I do not say that, as we must make allowances for 
your illness ; but it will not be breakfast.” 

“ Call it what you please,” replied Jack, “ only pray desire 
the servants to give me something to eat. Dry toast or muf- 
fins — any thing will do, but I should prefer coffee.” 

“You forget that you are off Finisterre, in a midshipman’s 
berth : coffee we have none — muffins we never see — dry toast 
cannot be made, as we have no soft bread ; but a cup cf tea, 
and ship’s biscuit and butter, I can desire the steward to get 
ready for you.” 

“ Well then,” replied Jack, “ I will thank you to procure o.e 
that.” 

“ Marine,” cried Jolliffe, “ call Mesty.” 

“ Pass the word for Mesty,” cried the marine — and the two 
syllables were handed forward until lost in the fore part of the 
vessel. 

The person so named must be introduced to the reader. He 
was a curious anomaly — a black man who had been brought to 
America as a slave, and there sold. 

He was a very tall, spare-built, yet muscular form, and had a 
face by no means common with his race. His head was long 
and narrow, high cheek-bones from whence his face descended 
down to almost a point at the chin ; his nose was very small, 
but it was straight and almost Koman ; his mouth aw was 
unusually small ; and his lips thin for an African ; lib* teeth 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


65 


very white, and filed to sharp points. He claimed the rank of 
prince in his own country, with what truth could not of course 
be substantiated. His master had settled at New York, and 
there Mesty had learned English, if it could be so called : the 
fact is, that all the emigrant labourers at New York being 
Irishmen, he had learned English with the strong brogue and 
peculiar phraseology of the sister kingdom dashed with a little 
Yankeeism. 

Having been told that there was no slavery in England, 
Mesty had concealed himself on board an English merchant 
vessel, and escaped. On his arrival in England he had entered 
on board of a man-of-war. Having no name, it was necessary 
to christen him on the ship’s books, and the first-lieutenant, who 
had entered, him, struck with his remarkable expression of 
countenance, and being a German scholar, had named him 
Mephistopheles Faust, from whence his Christian name had been 
razeed to Mesty. Mesty in other points was an eccentric 
character ; at one moment, when he remembered his lineage, 
he was proud to excess, at others he was grave and almost 
sullen — but when nothing either in daily occurrences or in his 
mind ran contrary, he exhibited the drollery so often found in 
his nation, with a spice of Irish humour, as if he had caught up 
the Utter with his Irish brogue. 

Mesty was soon seen coming aft, but almost double as he 
couched under the beams, and taking large strides with his 
naked feet. 

“ By the powers, Massa Yolliffe, but it is not seasonable at 
all to send for me just now, any how, seeing how the praters 
are in the copper, and so many blackguard ’palpeens all ready 
to change net for net, and better themselves by the same mis- 
take, ‘ dam urn.’ ” 

“ Mesty, you know I never send for you myself, or allow 
others to do so, unless it is necessary,” replied Jolliffe ; “but 
this poor lad has eaten nothing since he has been on board, and 
Is very hungry — you must get him a little tea.” 

n Is it tay you mane, sir ? — I guess, to make tay in the first 


66 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


place I must ab water, and in the next must ab room in the 
galley to put the kettle on — and ’pose you wanted to burn the 
tip of your little finger just now, it’s not in the galley that you 
find a berth for it — and den the water before seven bells. I’ve 
a notion it’s just impassible.” 

“ But he must have something, Mesty.” 

“ Never mind the tea, then,” replied Jack ; “ I’ll take some 
milk.” 

“ Is it milk massa means, and the bumboat woman on the 
Oder side of the bay ?” 

“ We have no milk, Mr. Easy ; you forget that we are on 
blue water,” replied Jolliffe, “ and I really am afraid that 
you’ll have to wait till dinner-time. Mesty tells the truth.” 

“ I tell you what, Massa Yolliffe, it just seven bells, and if 
the young gentleman would, instead of tay, try a little out of 
the coppar, it might keep him asy. It but a little difference, 
tay soup and $ay soup. Now a bowl of that, with some nuts 
and a flourish of pepper, will do him good, anyhow.” 

“ Perhaps the best thing he can take, Mesty ; get it as fast 
as you can.” 

In a few minutes the black brought down a bowl of soup 
and whole peas swimming in it, put before our hero a tin 
bread-basket full of small biscuit, called midshipmen’s nuts, 
and the pepper-caster. Jack’s visions of tea, coffee, muffins, 
dry toast, and milk, vanished as he perceived the mess ; but 
he was very hungry, and he found it much better than he 
expected : and he moreover found himself much the better 
after he had swallowed it. It struck seven bells, aid he 
accompanied Mr. Jolliffe on deck. 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


67 


CHAPTER X. 

SHOWING HOW JACK TRANSGRESSES AGAINST HIS OWN PHILOSOPHY, 

When Jack Easy had gained the deck, he fopnd the sun shining 
gaily, a soft air blowing from the snore, and the whole of the 
rigging and every part of the ship loaded with the shirts, 
trowsers, and jackets of the seamen, which had been wetted 
during the heavy gale, and were now hanging up to dry ; all 
the wet sails were also spread on the booms or triced up in the 
rigging, and the ship was slowly forging through the blue 
water. The Captain and first-lieutenant were standing on the 
gangway in converse, and the majority of the officers were 
with their quadrants and sextants ascertaining the latitude at 
noon. The decks were white and clean, the sweepers had just 
laid by their brooms, and the men were busy coiling down the 
ropes. It was a scene of cheerfulness, activity, and order, 
which lightened his heart after the four days of suffering, close 
air, and confinement, from which he had just emerged. 

The captain, who perceived him, beckoned to him, asked him 
kindly how he felt : the first-lieutenant also smiled upon him, 
and many of the officers, as well as his messmates, congratu” 
lated him upon his recovery. 

The captain’s steward came up to him, touched his hat, and 
requested the pleasure of his company to dinner in the cabin. 
Jack was the essence of politeness, took off his hat, and 
accepted the invitation. Jack was standing on a rope which a 
seaman was coiling down ; the man touched his hat, and 
requested he would be so kind as to take his foot off. J ack 
took his hat off his head in return, and his foot off the rope. 
The master touched his hat, and reported twelve o’clock to the 
first-lieutenant — the first-lieutenant touched his hat, and 
reported twelve o’clock to the captain — the captain touched 
his hat, and told the first-lieutenant to make it so. The officer 
of the watch touched his hat, and asked the captain whether 


68 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


they should pipe to dinner — the captain touched his hat and 
said, “ if you please.” 

The midshipman received his orders, and touched his hat, 
which he gave to the head boatswain’s mate, who touched his 
hat, and then the calls whistled cheerily. 

“ Well,” thought Jack* u politeness seems to be the order 
of the day, and every one has an equal respect for the other.” 
Jack stayed on deck ; he peeped through the ports, which 
were open, and looked down into the deep blue wave ; he cast 
his eyes aloft, and watched the tall spars sweeping and tracing 
with their points, as it were, a small portion of the clear sky, 
as they acted in obedience to the motion of the vessel ; he 
looked forward at the range of carronades whch lined the sides 
of the deck, and then he proceeded to climb one of the carro- 
nades, and lean over the hammocks to gaze on the distant land. 

“ Young gentleman, get off those hammocks,” cried the 
master, who was officer of the watch, in a surly tone. 

Jack looked round. 

“ Do you hear me, sir ? I’m speaking to you,” said the 
master again. 

J ack felt very indignant, and he thought that politeness was 
not quite so general as he supposed. 

It happened that Captain Wilson was upon deck. 

“ Come here, Mr. Easy,” said the captain ; “ it is a rule in 
the service, that no one gets on the hammocks, unless in case 
of emergency — I never do — nor the first-lieutenant — nor any 
of the officers or men — therefore upon the principles of equa- 
lity, you must not do it either.” 

“ Certainly not, sir,” replied Jack ; “ but still I do not 
see why that officer in the shining hat should be so angry, 
and not speak to me as if I were a gentleman, as well as 
himself.” 

“ I have already explained that to you, Mr. Easy.” 

“ Oh yes, I recollect now, it’s zeal ; but this zeal appears to 
me to be the only unpleasant thing in the service. It’s a pity, 
as you said, that the service cannot do without it.” 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


69 


Captain Wilson laughed, and walked away ; and shortly 
afterwards, as he turned up and down the deck with the 
master, he hinted to him, that he should not speak so sharply 
to a lad who had committed such a trifling error through igno- 
rance. Now, Mr. Smallsole, the master, who was a surly sort 
of a personage, and did not like even a hint of disapprobation 
of his conduct, although very regardless of the feeling of 
others, determined to pay this off on Jack, the very first con- 
venient opportunity. Jack dined in the cabin, and was very 
much pleased to find that every one drank wine with him, and 
that every body at the captain’s table appeared to be on an 
equality. Before the dessert had been on the table five minutes, 
Jack became loquacious on his favourite topic ; all the com- 
pany stared with surprise at such an unheard-of doctrine being 
broached on board of a man-of-war ; the captain argued the 
point, so as to controvert, without too much offending, Jack’s 
notions, laughing the whole time that the conversation was 
carried on. 

It will be observed, that this day may be considered as the 
first in which Jack really made his appearance on board, and it 
also was on the first day that Jack made known, at the cap- 
tain’s table, his very peculiar notions. If the company at the 
captain’s table, which consisted of the second-lieutenant, 
purser, Mr. Jolliffe, and one of the midshipmen, were asto- 
nished at such heterodox opinions being started in the presence 
of the captain, they were equally astonished at the cool, good- 
humoured ridicule with which they were received by Captain 
Wilson. The report of Jack’s boldness, and every word and 
opinion that he had uttered (of course much magnified), was 
circulated that evening through the whole ship ; it was can- 
vassed in the gun-room by the officers, it was descanted upon 
by the midshipmen as they walked the deck ; the captain’s 
steward held a levee abreast of the ship’s funnel, in which he 
narrated this new doctrine. The sergeant of marines gave his 
opinion in his berth, that it was damnable. The boatswain 
talked over the matter with the other warrant officers, till the 


70 


SIR. MIDSHIPSIAN EASY. 


grog was all gone, and then dismissed it as too dry a subject 
and it -was the general opinion- of the ship’s company, that as 
soon as they arrived at Gibraltar Bay, our hero would bid 
adieu to the service, either by being sentenced to death by a 
court-martial, or by being dismissed, and towed on shore on a 
grating. Others, who had more of the wisdom of the serpent, 
and who had been informed by Mr. Sawbridge that our hero 
was a lad who would inherit a large property, argued diffe- 
rently, and considered that Captain Wilson had very good 
reason for being so lenient — and among them was the second- 
lieutenant. There were but four who were well inclined 
towards Jack — to wit, the captain, the first-lieutenant, Mr. 
Jolliffe, the one-eyed master’s mate, and Mephistopheles, the 
black, who* having heard that Jack had uttered such senti- 
ments, loved him with all his heart and soul. 

We have referred to the second-lieutenant, Mr. Asper. This 
young man had a very high respect for birth, and particularly 
for money, of which he had very little. He was the son of an 
eminent merchant who, during the time that he was a midship- 
man, had allowed him a much larger sum for his expenses than 
was necessary or proper ; and, during his career, he found that 
his full pocket procured him consequence, not only among his 
own messmates, but also with many of the officers of the ships 
that he sailed in. A man who is able and willing to pay a 
large tavern bill, will always find followers — that is, to the 
tavern ; and lieutenants did not disdain to dine, walk arm-in- 
arm, and be “hail fellow well met” with a midshipman, at 
whose expense they lived during the time they were on shore. 
Mr. Asper had just received his commission and appointment, 
when his father became a bankrupt, and the fountain was dried 
up from which he had drawn such liberal supplies. Since that, 
Mr. Asper had felt that his consequence was gone : lie could 
no longer talk about the service being a bore, or that he should 
give it up ; he could no longer obtain that deference paid to 
nis purse, and not' to himself ; and he had contracted very 
expensive habits, without having any longer the means ot 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EAST. 


11 


gratifying them. It was therefore no wonder that he imbibed 
a great respect for money ; and, as he could no longer find the 
means himself, he was glad to pick up any body else at whose 
cost he could indulge in that extravagance and expense to 
which he had been so long accustomed, and still sighed for. 
Now, Mr. Asper knew that our hero was well supplied with 
money, as he had obtained from the waiter the amount of the 
bill paid at the Fountain, and he had been waiting for Jack’s 
appearance on deck to become his very dearest and most 
intimate friend. The conversation in the cabin made him feel 
assured that Jack would require and be grateful for support, 
and he had taken the opportunity of a walk with Mr. Sawbridge 
to offer to take Jack in his watch. Whether it was that Mr. 
Sawbridge saw through the design of Mr. Asper, or whether he 
imagined that our hero would be better pleased with him than 
with the master, considering his harshness of deportment ; or 
with himself, who could not, as first-lieutenant, overlook any 
remission of duty, the offer was accepted, and Jack Easy was 
ordered, as he now entered upon his duties, to keep watch 
under Lieutenant Asper. 

But not only was this the first day that Jack may be said to 
have appeared in the service, but it was the first day in which 
he had entered the midshipman’s berth, and was made 
acquainted with his messmates. 

We have already mentioned Mr. Jollifife, the master’s mate, 
but we must introduce him more particularly. Nature is some- 
times extremely arbitrary, and never did she show herself more 
so than in insisting that Mr. Jollifife should have the most sinis- 
ter expression of countenance that ever had been looked upon. 

He had suffered martyrdom with the small-pox, which pro- 
bably had contracted his lineaments : his face was not only 
deeply pitted, but scarred, with this cruel disorder. One eye 
had been lost, and all eyebrows had disappeared — and the con- 
trast between the dull, sightless opaque orb on one side of his 
face, and the brilliant, piercing little ball on the other, was 
almost terrifying. His nose had been eaten away by the 


72 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


disease till it formed a sharp but irregular point ; part of the 
muscles of the chin were contracted, and it was drawn in with 
unnatural seams and puckers. He was tall, gaunt, and thin, 
seldom smiled, and when he did, the smile produced a still 
further distortion. 

Mr.'Jolliffe was the son- of a warrant officer. He did not 
contract this disease until he had been sent out to the West 
Indies, where it swept away hundreds. He had now been long 
in the service, with little or no chance of promotion. He had 
suffered from indigence, from reflections upon his humble birth, 
from sarcasms on his appearance. Every contumely had been 
heaped upon him at one time or another, in the ships in which 
he served ; among a crowd he had found himself desolate — 
and now, although no one dared treat him to his face with 
disrespect, he was only respected in the service from a know- 
ledge of his utility and exemplary performance of his duties — 
he had no friends or even companions. For many years he 
had retired within himself, he had improved by reading and 
study, had felt all the philanthropy of a Christian, and extend- 
ed it towards others. Silent and reserved, he seldom spoke in 
the berth, unlsss his authority, as caterer, was called for ; all 
respected Mr. Jolliffe, but no one liked, as a companion, one 
at whose appearance the very dogs would bark. At the same 
time every one acknowledged his correct behaviour in every 
point, his sense of justice, his forbearance, his kindness, and 
his good sense. With him life was indeed a pilgrimage, and he 
wended his way in all Christian charity, and all Christian zeal. 

In all societies, however small they may be, provided that 
they do but amount to half-a-dozen, you will invariably meet 
with a bully. And it is also generally the case that you will 
find one of that society who is more or less the butt. You will 
discover this even in occasional meetings, such as a dinner 
party, the major part of which have never met before. 

Previous to the removal of the cloth, the bully will have 
shown himself by his dictatorial manner, and will also have 
selected the one upon whom he imagines that he can best prac- 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


13 


tise. In a midshipman’s berth, this fact has become almost 
proverbial, although now perhaps it is not attended with that 
disagreeable despotism which was permitted at the time that 
our hero entered the service. 

The bully of the midshipman’s berth of H. M. sloop Harpy 
was a young man about seventeen, with light, curly hair, and 
florid countenance, the son of the clerk in the dockyard at 
Plymouth, and his name was Vigors. 

The butt was a pudding-faced Tartar-physiognomied boy of 
fifteen, whose intellects, with fostering, if not great, might at 
:east have been respectable, had he not lost all confidence in 
his own powers from the constant jeers and mockeries of those 
who had a greater fluency of speech without perhaps so much 
real power of mind. Although slow, what he learnt he inva- 
riably retained. This lad’s name was Gossett. His father was 
a wealthy yeoman of Lynn, in Norfolk. There were at the 
time but three other midshipmen in the ship, of whom it can 
only be said that they were like midshipmen in general, with 
little appetite for learning, but good appetites for dinner, 
hating everything like work, fond of everything like fun, fight- 
ing a Vouirana one minute, and sworn friends the next — with 
general principles of honour and justice, but which were occa- 
sionally warped according to circumstances ; with all the 
virtues and vices so heterogeneously jumbled and heaped to- 
gether, that it was almost impossible to ascribe any action to 
its true motive, and to ascertain to what point their vice was 
softened down into almost a virtue, and their virtues from mere 
excess degenerated into vice. Their names were O’Connor, 
Mills, and Gascoigne. The other shipmates of our hero it will 
be better to introduce as they appear on the stage. 

After Jack had dined ux the cabin, he followed his mess- 
mates Jolliffe and Gascoigne down into the midshipmen’s 
berth. 

“ I say, Easy,” observed Gascoigne, “you are a devilish free 
and easy sort of a fellow, to tell the captain that you consider- 
ed yourself as great a man as he was.” 

4 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EAST. 


u 


“ I beg your pardon,” replied Jack, “ I did not argue indivi- 
dually, but generally, upon the principles of the rights of 
man.” 

“Well,” replied Gascoigne, “it’s the first time I ever heard 
a middy do such a bold thing ; take care your rights of man 
don’t get you in the wrong box — there’s no arguing on board 
of & man-of-war. The captain took it amazingly easy, but 
you’d better not broach that subject too often.” 

“ Gascoigne gives you very good advice, Mr. Easy,” observed 
Jolliffe ; “ allowing that your ideas are correct, which it 
appears to me they are not, or at least impossible to be acted 
upon, there is such a thing as prudence, and however much 
this question may be canvassed on shore, in his majesty’s ser- 
vice it is not only dangerous in itself, but will be very prejudi- 
cial to you.” 

“ Man is a free agent,” replied Easy. 

“ I’ll be shot if a midshipman is,” replied Gascoigne, laugh- 
ing, “ and that you’ll soon find.” 

“ And yet it was the expectation of finding that equality 
that I was induced to come to sea.” 

“ On the first of April, I presume,” replied Gascoigne. 
“ But are you really serious ?” 

Hereupon Jack entered into a long argument, to which 
Jolliffe and Gascoigne listened without interruption, and Mesty 
with admiration : at the end of it, Gascoigne laughed heartily, 
and Jolliffe sighed. 

“ From whence did you learn all this ?” inquired Jolliffe. 

“ From my father, who is a great philosopher, and has coc- 
stantly upheld these opinions.” 

“ And did your father wish you to go to sea ?” 

“No, he was opposed to it,” replied Jack, “but of course 
he could not combat my rights and free-will.” 

“ Mr. Easy, as a friend,” replied Jolliffe, “ I request that 
you would as much as possible keep your opinions to yourself ; 
I shall have an opportunity of talking to you on the subject, 
and will then explain to you my reason.” 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


75 


As soon as Mr. Jolliffe had ceased, down came Mr. Vigors 
and O’Connor, who had heard the news of Jack’s heresy. 

“You do not know Mr. Vigors and Mr. O’Connor,” said 
Jolliffe to Easy. 

Jack, who was the essence of politeness, rose and bowed, at 
which the others took their seats, without returning the salu 
tation. Vigors had, from what he had heard and now seen of 
Easy, thought he had somebody else to play upon, and without 
ceremony he commenced. 

“ So, my chap, you are come on board to raise a mutiny 
here with your equality — you came off scott free at the cap- 
tain’s table ; but it won’t do, I can tell you, even in the mid- 
shipman’s berth : some must knock under, and you are one of 
them.” 

“ If, sir,” replied Easy, “ you mean by knock under, that I 
must submit, I can assure you that you are mistaken. Upon 
the same principle that I would never play the tyrant to those 
weaker than myself, so will I resent oppression if attempted.” 

“ Damme, but he’s a regular sea lawyer already : however, 
my boy, we’ll soon put your metal to the proof.” 

“ Am I then to infer that I am not on an equality with my 
messmates ?” replied Jack, looking at Jolliffe. The latter was 
about to answer him, but Vigors interrupted. 

“Yes, you are on an equality as far as this, — that you have 
an equal right to the berth, if you are not knocked out of it for 
insolence to your masters ; that you have an equal share to 
pay for the things purchased for the mess, and an equal right 
to have your share, provided you can get it ; you have an 
equal right to talk, provided you are not told to hold your 
tongue. The fact is, you have an equal right with every one 
else to do as you can, get what you can, and say what you can, 
always provided that you can do it ; for here the weakest goes 
to the wall, and that is midshipman’s berth equality. Now, 
do you understand all that ; or will you wait for a practical 
illustration ?” 

“ I am, then, to infer that the equality here is as much 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


16 

destroyed as it even will be among savages, where the strong 
oppress the weak, and the only law is club law — in fact, much 
the same as it is at a public or large school on shore ?” 

“ I suspect you are right for once. You were at a public 
school : how did they treat you there V ’ 

“ As you propose treating people here, — ‘ the weakest went 
to the wall.’ ” 

“Well, then, a nod’s as good as a wink to a blind horse, 
that’s all, my hearty,” said Vigors. 

But the hands being turned up, “ Shorten sail ” put an end 
to the altercation for the present. 

As our hero had not yet received orders to go to his duty, 
he remained below with Mesty. , 

“By de powers, Massa Easy, but I lub you with my hole 
soul,” said Mesty. “By Jasus, you really tark fine, Massa 
Easy ; dat Mr. Vigors — nebber care for him, wouldn’t you lik 
him — and sure you would,” continued the Black, feeling the 
muscle of Jack’s arm. “By the soul of my fader, I’d bet my 
week’s allowance on -you any how. Nebber be ’fraid, Massa 
Easy.” 

“Iam not afraid,” replied Jack; “I’ve thrashed bigger 
fellows than he and Jack’s assertion was true. Mr. Bonny- 
castle never interfered in a fair fight, and took no notice of 
black eyes, provided the lessons were well said. Jack had 
fought and fought again, until he was a very good bruiser, and 
although not so tall as Vigors, he was much better built for 
fighting. A knowing Westminster boy would have bet his 
half-crown upon Jack, had he seen him and his anticipated 
adversary. 

The constant battles which Jack was obliged to fight at 
school had been brought forward by Jack against his father’s 
arguments in favour of equality, but they had been overruled 
by Mr. Easy’s pointing out that the combats of boys had no- 
thing to do with the rights of man. 

As soon as the watch was called, Vigors, O’Connor, Gossett, 
and Gascoigne, came down into the berth. Vigors, who was 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


in 

sVougest in the berth, except Jolliffe, had successively had 
his si-periority acknowledged, and, when on deck, he had 
talked of Easy’s impertinence, and his intention of bringing him 
tv> his senses. The others, therefore, came down to see the 
fun. 

'Well, Mr. Easy,” observed Vigors, as he came into the 
berth, “ you take after your name, at all events ; I suppose 
you intend to eat the king’s provisions, and do nothing.” 

Jack’s mettle was already up. 

“You will oblige me, sir, by minding your own business,” 
replied Jack. 

“You impudent blackguard, if you say another word, I’ll 
give you a good thrashing, and knock some of your equality 
out of you.” 

“ Iftdeed,” replied Jack, who almost fancied himself back at 
Mr. Bonnycastle’s ; “ we’ll try that.” 

Whereupon Jack very coolly divested himself of his upper 
garments, neckkerchief, and shirt, much to the surprise of Mr. 
Vigors, who little contemplated such a proof of decision and 
confidence, and still more to the delight of the other midship- 
men, who would have forfeited a week’s allowance to see Vigors 
well thrashed. Vigors, however, knew that he had gone too 
far to retreat ; he, therefore, prepared for action ; and, when 
ready, the whole party went out into the steerage to settle the 
business 

Vigors had gained his assumed authority more by bullying 
than fighting ; others had submitted to him without a sufficient 
trial ; Jack, on the contrary, had won his way up in school by 
hard and scientific combat : the result, therefore, may easily 
be imagined. In less than a quarter of an hour Vigors, beaten 
dead, with his eyes closed, and three teeth out, gave in ; while 
Jack, after a basin of water, looked as fresh as ever, with the 
exception of a few trifling scratches. 

The news of this victory was soon through the ship ; and 
before Jack had resumed his clothes, it had been told confi 
dentially by Sawbridge to the captain. 


78 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


“ So soon !” said Captain Wilson, laughing : “ I expected 
that a midshipman’s berth would do wonders ; but I did not 
expect this, yet awhile. This victory is the first severe blow 
to Mr. Easy’s equality, and will be more valuable than twenty 
defeats. Let him now go to his duty, he will soon find his 
level.” 


CHAPTER XI. 

IN WHICH OUR HERO PROVES THAT ALL ON BOARD SHOULD EQUALLY 
SACRIFICE DECENCY TO DUTY. 

The success of any young man in a profession very much 
depends upon the occurrences at the commencement of his 
career, as from those is his character judged, and he is treated 
accordingly. Jack had chosen to enter the service at a much 
later period than most lads ; he was tall and manly for his 
age, and his countenance, if not strictly handsome, wore that 
expression of honesty and boldness which is sure to please. 
His spirit in not submitting to, and meeting Vigors when he 
had hardly recovered from his severe prostration of sea-sickness, 
had gained him with the many respect, and with all, except 
his antagonist and Mr. Smallsole, goodwill. Instead of being 
laughed at by his messmates, he was played with ; for Jolliffe 
smiled at his absurdities, and attempted to reason him out of 
them, and the others liked Jack for himself and his generosity, 
and moreover, because they looked up to him as a protector 
against Vigors, who had persecuted them all ; for Jack had 
declared that as might was right in a midshipman’s berth, he 
would so far restore equality, that if he could not put down 
those who w'ere the strongest, at all events he would protect 
the weak, and, let who would come into the berth, they must 
be his master before they should tyrannise over those weakci 
than he 


MK. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


79 


Thus did J ack Easy make the best use that he could of his 
strength, and become, as it were, the champion and security 
of those who, although much longer at sea and more expe- 
rienced than he was, were glad to shelter themselves under his 
courage and skill, the latter of which had excited the admira- 
tion of the* butcher of the ship, who had been a pugilist by pro- 
fession. Thus did Jack at once take the rank of an oldster, 
and soon became the leader of all the mischief. We particu- 
larly observe this, because, had it so happened that our hero 
had succumbed to Vigors, the case would have been the very 
reverse. He then would have had to go through the ordeal to 
which most who enter the naval service are exposed, which 
cannot be better explained than by comparing it to the fagging 
carried to such an iniquitous extent in public schools. 

Mr. Asper, for his own reasons, made him his companion : 
they walked the night watch together, and he listened to all 
Jack’s nonsense about the rights of man. And here Mr. Asper 
did good without intending it, for, at the same time that he 
appeared to agree with Jack, to secure his favour, he cautioned 
him, and pointed out why this equality could not exist alto- 
gether on board of a man-of-war. 

As for himself, he said, he saw no difference between a lieu- 
tenant, or even a captain, and a midshipman, provided they 
were gentlemen : he should choose his friends where he liked, 
and despised that power of annoyance which the service per- 
mitted. Of course, Jack and Mr. Asper were good friends, 
especially as, when half the watch was over, to conciliate his 
good will, and to get rid of his eternal arguing, Mr. Asper 
would send Jack down to bed. 

They were now entering the Straits, and expected to anchor 
the next day at Gibraltar, and Jack was forward on the fore- 
castle, talking with Mesty, with whom he had contracted a 
great friendship, for there was nothing that Mesty would not 
have done for Jack, although he had not been three weeks in 
the ship 5 but a little reflection will show that it was natural. 

Mesty had been a great man in his own country ; he had 


80 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


suffered all the horrors of a passage in a slave ship ; \e had 
been sold as a slave twice ; he had escaped — but he four.d that 
the universal feeling was strong against his colour, and that on 
board of a man-of-war he was condemned, although free, to the 
humblest of offices. 

He had never heard any one utter the sentiments, which now 
beat in his own heart, of liberty and equality — we say now, for 
when he was in his own country before his captivity, he had no 
idea of equality ; no one has who is in power : but he had been 
schooled ; and although people talked of liberty and equality 
at New York, he found that what they preached for themselves, 
they did not practise towards others, and that, in the midst of 
liberty and equality, he and thousands more were enslaved and 
degraded beings. 

Escaping to England, he had regained his liberty, but not his 
equality ; his colour had prevented the latter, and in that feel- 
ing all the world appeared to conspire together against him, 
until, to his astonishment, he heard those sentiments boldly 
expressed from the lips of Jack, and that in a service where 
it was almost tantamount to mutiny. Mesty, whose character 
is not yet developed, immediately took a fondness for our hero, 
and in a hundred "ways showed his attachment. Jack also liked 
Mesty, and was fond of talking with him, and every evening, 
since the combat with Vigors, they had generally met in the 
forecastle to discuss the principles of equality and the rights of 
man. 

The boatswain, whose name was Biggs, was a slight, dapper, 
active little man, who, as captain of the foretop, had shown an 
uncommon degree of courage in a hurricane, so much so, as to 
recommend him to the admiral for promotion. It was g^ven to 
him ; and after the ship to which he had been appointed was 
paid off, he had been ordered to join H. M. sloop Harpy. 
Jack’s conversation with Mesty was interrupted by the voico 
of the boatswain, who was haranguing his boy. “ It’s now 
ten minutes, sir, by my repeater,” said the boatswain, that I 
have sent for you and Mr. Biggs pulled out a huge silvei 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


81 


watch, almost as big as a Norfolk turnip. A Jew had sold 
him the watch ; the boatswain had heard of repeaters, and 
wished to have one. Moses had only showed him watches with 
the hour and minute hands ; he now produced one with a second 
hand, telling him it was a repeater. 

“ What makes it a repeater ?” inquired the boatswain. 

“ Common watches,” said the cunning Jew, “only tell the 
minutes and hours ; but all repeaters tell the seconds.” 

The boatswain was satisfied — bought the watch, and, 
although many had told him it was no repeater, he insisted 
that it was, and would call it so. 

“I swear,” continued the boatswain, “it's ten minutes and 
twenty seconds by my repeater.” 

“ If you please sir,” said the boy, “ I was changing my 
trousers when you sent for me, and then I had to stow away 
my bag again.” 

“ Silence, sir ; I’d have you to know that when you are sent 
for by your officer, trousers or no trousers, it is your duty to 
come up directly.” 

“ Without trousers, sir 1” replied the boy. 

“Yes, sir, without trousers ; if the captain required me, I 
should come without my shirt. Duty before decency.” So 
saying, the boatswain lays hold of the boy. 

“Surely, Mr. Biggs,” said Jack, “you are not going to 
punish that boy for not coming up without his trousers !” 

“ Yes, Mr. Easy, I am — I must teach him a lesson. We are 
bound, now that new-fangled ideas are brought into the ship, 
to uphold the dignity of the service ; and the orders of an 
officer are not to be delayed ten minutes and twenty seconds 
because a boy has no trousers on. Whereupon the boatswain 
administered several smart cuts with his rattan upon the boy, 
proving that it was quite as well that he had put on his trousers 
before he came on deck. “ There,” said Mr. Biggs, “ is a lesson 
for you, you scamp — and, Mr. Easy, it is a lesson for you also,” 
continued the boatswain, walking away with a most consequen- 
tial air. 


4* 


82 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


“Murder Irish!” said Mesty — “how him cut caper. De 
Oder day he haul out the weather ear-ring, and touch him hat 
to a midshipman. Sure enough, make um cat laugh.” 

The next day, the Harpy was at anchor in Gibraltar Pay * 
the captain went on shore, directing the gig to be sent for him 
before nine o’clock ; after which hour the sally-port is only 
opened by special permission. There happened to be a ball 
given by the officers of the garrison on that evening, and a 
polite invitation was sent to the officers of his H. M. sloop 
Harpy. As those who accepted the invitation would be de- 
tained late, it was not possible for them to come off that night. 
And as their services were required for the next day, Captain 
Wilson allowed them to remain on shore until seven o’clock the 
next morning, at which hour, as there was a large party, there 
would be two boats sent for them. 

Mr. Asper obtained leave, and asked permission to take our 
hero with him ; to which Mr. Sawbridge consented. Many 
other officers obtained leave, and among others, the boatswain, 
who, aware that his services would be in .request as soon as the 
equipment commenced, asked permission for this evening. And 
Mr. Sawbiidge, Reeling that he could be better spared at this 
than at any other time, consented. Asper and Jack went to 
an inn, dined, bespoke beds, and then dressed themselves for 
the ball, which was very brilliant, and, from the company of 
the officers, very pleasant. Captain Wilson looked on at the 
commencement, and then returned on board. Jack behaved 
with his usual politeness, danced till two o’clock, and then, as 
the ball thinned, Asper proposed that they should retire. Hav- 
ing once more applied to the refreshment-room, they had pro- 
cured their hats, and were about to depart, when one of the 
officers of the garrison asked Jack if he would like to see a 
baboon, which had just been brought down from the rock ; and, 
taking some of the cakes, they repaired to the court where the 
animal was chained down to a small tank. Jack fed the brute 
till all the cakes were gone, and then, because he had no more 
to give him, the baboon flew at Jack, who' in making his retreat, 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


83 


fell back into the tank, which was about two feet deep. This 
was a Joke ; and having laughed heartily, they wished the 
officer good night, and went to the inn. 

Now, what with the number of officers of the Harpy on shore, 
who had all put up at the same inn, and other occupants, the 
landlord was obliged to put his company into double and 
treble-bedded rooms ; but this was of little consequence. Jack 
was shown into a double-bedded room, and proceeded to un- 
dress ; the other was evidently occupied, by the heavy breathing 
which saluted Jack’s ear. 

As Jack undressed, he recollected that his trousers were wet 
through, and to dry them he opened the window, hung them 
out, and then jammed down the window upon them, to hold 
them in their position, after which he turned in and fell fast 
asleep. At six o’clock he was called, as he had requested, 
and proceeded to dress, but to his astonishment found the win- 
* dow thrown open and his trousers missing. It was evident, 
that his partner in the room had thrown the window open 
during the night, and that his trousers, having fallen down into 
street, had been walked off with by somebody or another. Jack 
looked out of the window once more, and perceived that who- 
ever had thrown open the window had been unwell during the 
night. A nice drunken companion I have had, thought Jack ; 
but what’s to be done ? And in saying this, he walked up to 
the other bed, and perceived that it was tenanted by the boat- 
swain. Well, thought Jack, as Mr. Biggs has thought proper 
to lose my trousers, I think I have a-right to take his, or at least 
the wear of them to go on board. It was but last night he 
declared that decency must give way to duty, and that the 
orders of a superior officer were to be obeyed, with or without 
garments. I know he is obliged to be on board, and now he 
shall try how he likes to obey orders in his shirt tails. So 
cogitating, Jack took the trousers of his boatswain, who still 
snored, although he had been called, and, putting them on, 
completed the rest of his dress, and quitted the room. He 
went to that of Mr. Asper, where he found him just ready, and. 


84 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASf. 


having paid the hill — for Asper had forgotten his purse — ihej* 
proceeded down to the sally-port, where they found other 
officers waiting, sufficient to load the first boat, which shoved 
off, and they went on board. As soon as he was down below, 
Jack hastened to change his trousers, and, unobserved by any 
one, threw those belonging to Mr. Biggs on a chair in his 
cabin, and, having made a confidant of Mesty, who was 
delighted, he went on deck, and waited the issue of the 
affair. 

Before J ack left the hotel, he had told the waiter that there 
was the boatswain still fast asleep, and that he must be roused 
up immediately ; and this injunction was obeyed. The boat- 
swain, who had drunk too much the night before, and, as Jack 
had truly imagined, had opened the window because he was un- 
well, was wakened up, and, hearing how late it was, hastened to 
dress himself. Not finding his trousers, he rang the bell, sup- 
posing that they had been taken down to be brushed, and, in 
the mean time, put on every thing else, that he might lose no 
time : the waiter who answered the bell, denied having taken 
the trousers out of the room, and poor Mr. Biggs was in a sad 
quandary. What had become of them, he could not tell ; he 
had no recollection of having gone to bed the night before ; he 
inquired of the waiter, who said that he knew nothing about 
them — that he was very tipsy when he came home, and that 
when he called him, he had found the window open, and it ap- 
peared that he had been mrwell — he supposed that he had 
thrown his trousers out of -the window. Time flew, and the 
boatswain was in despair. “ Could they lend him a pair ?” 

“ He w'ould call his master.” 

The master of the inn knew very well the difference of rani 
between officers, and those whom he could trust and those whom 
he could not. He sent up the bill by the waiter, and staged 
that, for a deposit, the gentleman might have a pair of trousers. 
The boatswain felt in his pockets and remembered that all his 
money was in his trousers’ pocket. He could not o r .ly not 
leave a deposit, but could not pay his bill. The landWrd was 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


85 


inexorable. It was bad enough to lose his money, but he could 
not lose more. 

“ I shall be tried by a court-martial, by heavens!” exclaimed 
the boatswain. “ It’s not far from the sally-port : I will make 
a run for it, and I can slip into one of the boats and get an- 
other pair of trousers before I report myself as having come on 
beard ;” so making up his mind, the boatswain took to his 
heels, and with his check shirt tails streaming in the wind, ran as 
hard as he could to where the boat was waiting to receive him. 
He was encountered by many, but he only ran the faster the 
more they jeered, and, at last, arrived breathless at his goal, 
flew down the steps, jumped into the boat, and squatted on the 
stern sheets, much to the surprise of the officers and men, who 
thought him mad. He stated in a few words tfcat somebody 
had stolen his trousers during the night; and as it was already 
late, the boat shoved off, the men as well as the officers con- 
vulsed with laughter. 

“Have any of you a pea-jacket?” inquired the boatswain of 
one of the men — but the weather was so warm that none of 
them had brought a pea-jacket. The boatswain looked round; 
he perceived that the officers were sitting on a boat-cloak. 

“ Whose boat-cloak is that ?” inquired the boatswain. 

“ Mine,” replied Gascoigne. 

“ I trust Mr. Gascoigne you will have the kindness to lend 
it to me to go up the side with.” 

“ Indeed I will not,” replied Gascoigne, who would sooner 
have thrown it overboard and have lost it, than not beheld the 
anticipated fun : “ recollect I asked you for a fishing line, when 
we were becalmed off Cape St. Vincent, and you sent word that 
you’d see me d— d first. Now I’ll just see you the same before 
you have my boat-cloak.” 

“ Oh, Mr. Gascoigne, I’ll give you three lines directly I get 
on board.” 

“ I dare say you will, but that won’t do now. * Tit for tat,’ 
Mr. Boatswain, and hang all favours,” replied Gascoigne, who 
was steering the boat, having been sent on shore for the otners. 


86 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


“ In bow — rowed of all.” The boat was laid alongside— the 
relentless Gascoigne caught up his boat cloak as the other 
officers rose to go on board, and rolling it up, in spite of the 
earnest entreaties of Mr. Biggs, tossed it into the main chains, 
to the man who had thrown the stern-fast,, and to make the 
situation of Mr. Biggs still more deplorable, the first-lieutenant 
was standing looking into the boat, and Captain Wilson walk- 
ing the quarter deck. 

“ Come, Mr. Biggs, I expected you off in the first boat,” 
cried Mr. Sawbridge ; “be as smart as you please, for the yards 
are not yet squared.” 

“ Shall I go a-head in this boat, and square them, sir ?” 

“ That boat, no; let her drop astern, jump up here and lower 
the dingey. What the devil do you sit down there for, Mr. 
Biggs ? — you’ll oblige me by showing a little more activity, or, 
by Jove, you may save yourself the trouble of asking to go on 
shore again. Are you sober, sir ?” 

The last observation decided Mr. Biggs. He sprang up from 
the boat just as he was, and touched his hat as he passed the 
first-lieutenant. 

“ Perfectly sober, sir, but I’ve lost my trousers.” 

“ So it appears, sir,” replied Mr. Sawbridge, as Mr. Biggs 
stood on the planeshear of the sloop where the hammock netting 
divides for an entrance, with his shirt-tails fluttering in the sea 
breeze ; but Mr. Sawbridge could not contain himself any lon- 
ger ; he ran down the ship ladder which led on the quarter 
deck, choked with laughter. Mr. Biggs could not descend until 
after Mr. Sawbridge, and the conversation had attracted the 
notice of all, and every eye in the ship was on him. 

“ What’s all this ?” said Captain Wilson, coming to the 
gangway. 

“ Duty before decency,” replied Jack, who stood by enjoying 
the joke. 

Mr. Biggs recollected the day before — he cast a furious look 
at Jack, as he touched his hat to the captain, and then dived 
down to the lower deck. 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


87 


If any thing could add to the indignation of the boatswain, 
it was to find that his trousers had come on board before him. 
He now felt that a trick had been played him, and also that 
our hero must have been the party, but he could prove nothing; 
he could not say who slept in the same room, for he was fast 
asleep when Jack went to bed, and fast asleep when Jack 
quitted the room. 

The truth of the story soon became known to all the ship, 
and “ duty before decency ” became a bye-word. All that the 
boatswain could do he did, which was to revenge himself upon 
the poor boy — and Gascoigne and Jack never got any fishing 
tackle. The boatswain was as obnoxious to the men as Vigors, 
and in consequence of Jack’s known opinions upon the rights 
of man, and his having floored their two greatest enemies, he 
became a great favourite with the seamen, and as all favourites 
are honoured by them with a sobriquet, our hero obtained that 
cf Equality Jack. 


CHAPTER XII. 

IN WHICH OUR HERO PREFERS GOING DOWN TO GOING UP ; A CHOICE, 
IT IS TO BE HOPED, HE WILL REVERSE UPON A MORE IMPORTANT 
OCCASION. 

The next day being Sunday, the hands were turned up to 
divisions, and the weather not being favourable, instead of 
the service, the articles of war were read with all due respect 
shown to the same, the captain, officers and crew, with their 
hats off in a mizzling rain. Jack, who had been told by the 
captain that these articles of war were the rules and regu- 
lations of the service, by which the captain, officers, and men, 
were equally bound, listened to them as they were read by 
the clerk with the greatest attention. He little thought that 


88 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


there were about five hundred orders from the admiralty 
tacked on to them, which, like the numerous codicils of some 
wills, contained the most important matter, and to a certain 
degree made the will nugatory. 

Jack listened very attentively, and, as each article was 
propounded, felt that he was not likely to commit himself 
in that point, and, although he was rather astonished to find 
such a positive injunction against swearing, considered quite 
a dead letter in the ship, he thought that, altogether, he saw 
his way very clear. But to make certain of it, as soon as 
the hands had been piped down be begged the clerk to let 
him have a copy of the articles. 

Now tbe clerk had three, being the allowance of the ship, or 
at least all that he had in his -possession, and made some demur 
at parting with one ; but at last he proposed — “ some rascal, 
as he said, having stolen his tooth-brush,” — that if Jack would 
give him one he would give him one of the copies of the articles 
of war. Jack replied that the one he had in use was very much 
worn, and that unfortunately he had but one new one, which 
he could not spare. Thereupon the clerk, wjio was a very clean 
personage, and pould not bear that his teeth should be dirty, 
agreed to accept the one in use, as Jack could not part with 
the other. The exchange was made, and Jack read the articles 
of war over and over again, till he thought he was fully master 
of them. 

“ Now,” says Jack, “ I know what I am to do, and what I 
am to expect, and these articles of war I will carry in my 
pocket as long as I’m in the service ; that is to say, if they last 
so long ; and provided they do not, I am able to replace them 
with another old tooth brush, which appears to be the value 
attached to them.” 

The Harpy remained a fortnight in Gibraltar Bay, and Jack 
had occasionally a run on shore, and Mr. Asper invariably went 
with him to keep him out of mischief ; that is to say, he 
allowed him to throw his money away on nobody more worth 
less than himself* 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


89 


One morning Jack went down in the berth, and found young 
Gossett blubbering. 

“ What’s the matter, my dear Mr. Gossett ?” inquired Jack, 
who was just as polite to the youngster as he was to any body 
else, 

“ Vigors has been thrashing me with a rope’s end,” replied 
Gossett, rubbing his arm and shoulders. 

“ What for ?” inquired Jack. 

“ Because he says the service is going to hell — (I’m sure it’s 
no fault of mine) — and that now all subordination is destroyed, 
and that upstarts join the ship who, because they have a five- 
pound note in their pocket, are allowed to do just as they 
please. He said he was determined to uphold the service, and 
then he knocked me down — and when 1 got up again he told 
me that I could stand a little more — and then he took out his 
colt, and said he was determined to ride the high horse — and 
that there should be no Equality Jack in future.” 

“ Well,” replied Jack. 

“ And then he colted me for half an hour, and that’s all.” 

“By de soul of my fader, but it all for true, Massa Easy — 
he larrup urn, sure enough — all for noteing, bad luck to him — 
I tink,” continued Mesty, “ he hab debelish bad memory — and 
he want a little more of Equality Jack.” 

“ And he shall have it too,” replied our hero ; “ why it’s 
against the articles of war, ‘ all quarrelling, fighting, &c.’ I 
say, Mr. Gossett, have you got the spirit of a louse ?” 

“ Yes,” replied Gossett. 

“ Well, then, will you do what I tell you next time, and trust 
to me for protection ?” 

“ I don’t care what I do,” replied the boy, “ if you will back 
me against the cowardly tyrant.” 

“ Do you refer to me ?” cried Vigors, who had stopped at 
the door of the berth. 

“ Say yes,” said Jack. 

“ Yes, I do,” cried Gossett. 

“You do, do you ? — well, then, my chick, I must trouble 


90 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY 


you with a little more of this,” said Vigors, drawing out his 
colt. 

“ I think that you had better not, Mr. Vigors,” observed 
Jack. 

“ Mind your own business, if you please,” returned Vigors, 
not much liking the interference. “I am not addressing my 
conversation to you, and I will thank you never to interfere 
with me. I presume I have a right to choose my own acquaint- 
ance, and, depend upon it, it will not be that of a leveller.” 

“All that is at your pleasure, Mr. Vigors,” replied Jack, 
“ you have a right to choose your own acquaintance, and so 
have I a right to choose my own friends, and further, to sup- 
port them. That lad is my friend, Mr. Vigors.” 

“ Then,” replied Vigors, who could not help bullying even 
at the risk of another combat -which he probably intended to 
stand, “ I shall take the liberty of giving your friend a thrash 
ing ;” and he suited the action to the word. 

“ Then I shall take the liberty to defend my friend,” replied 
Jack ; “and as you call me a leveller, I’ll try if I may not 
deserve the name ” — whereupon Jack placed a blow so well 
under the ear, that Mr. Vigors dropped on the deck, and was 
not in condition to come to the scratch, even if he had been 
inclined. “ And now, youngster,” said Jack, wresting the colt 
out of Vigors’ hand, “ do as I bid you — give him a good colt- 
ing — if you don’t I’ll thrash you.” 

Gossett required no second threat ; — the pleasure of thrash- 
ing his enemy, if only for once, was quite enough — and he laid 
well on. J ack with his fists doubled ready to protect him if 
there was a show of resistance, but Vigors was half stupefied 
with the blow under the ear, and quite cowed ; he took his 
thrashing in the most passive manner. 

“ That will do,” said Jack ; “ and now do not be afraid, 
Gossett ; the very first time he offers to strike you when I am 
not present, I will pay him off for it as soon as you tell me. I 
won’t be called Equality Jack for nothing.” 

When Jolliffe, who heard of this, met our hero alone, he 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


91 


said to him, “ Take my advice, boy, and do not in future fight 
th.i battles of others, you’ll find very soon that you will have 
enough to do to fight your own.” 

Whereupon Jack argued the point for half an hour, and then 
they separated. But Mr. Jolliffe was right. Jack began to 
find himself constantly in hot water, and the captain and first- 
lieutenant, although they did not really withdraw their protec- 
tion, thought it high time that Jack should find out that, on 
board a man-of-war, every body and every thing must find its 
level. 

There was on board of his majesty’s sloop Harpy, a man of 
the name of Easthupp, who did the duty of purser’s steward ; 
this was the second ship that he had served in ; in the former 
he had been sent with a draft of men from the Tender lying off 
the Tower. How he had come into the service was not known 
in the present ship, but the fact was, that he had been one of 
the swell mob — and had been sent on board the Tender with a 
letter of recommendation from the magistrates to Captain 
Crouch. He was a cockney by birth, for he had been left at 
the workhouse of St. Mary Axe, where he had been taught to 
read and write, and had afterwards made his escape. He joined 
the juvenile thieves of the metropolis, had been sent to Bride- 
well, obtained his liberty, and by degrees had risen from petty 
thieving of goods exposed outside of the shops and market-stalls, 
to the higher class of gentlemen pickpockets. His appearance 
was somewhat genteel, with a bullying sort of an impudent air, 
which is mistaken for fashion by those who know no better. 
A remarkable neat dresser, for that was part of his profession ; 
a very plausible manner and address ; a great fluency of lan- 
guage, although he clipped the king’s English ; and, as he had 
suffered more than once by the law, it is not to be wondered at, 
that he was, as he called himself, a ko:it-and-hout radical. 
During the latter part of his service, in his last ship, he had 
been employed under the purser’s steward, and having offered 
himself in this capacity to the purser of H. M. sloop Harpy, 
with one or two forged certificates, he had been accepted. 


92 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


Now, when Mr. Easthupp heard of Jack’s opinions, he wished 
to cultivate his acquaintance, and with a bow and a flourish, 
introduced himself before they arrived at Gibraltar, but our 
hero took an immediate dislike to this fellow from his excessive 
and impertinent familiarity. 

Jack knew a gentleman when he met one, and did not choose 
to be a companion to a man beneath him in every way, but 
who, upon the strength of Jack’s liberal opinions, presumed to 
be his equal. Jack’s equality did not go so far as that ; in 
theory it was all very well, but in practice it was only when it 
suited his own purpose. 

But the purser’s steward was not to be checked — a man who 
has belonged to the swell mob is not easily repulsed ; and, 
although Jack would plainly show him that his company was 
not agreeable, Easthupp would constantly accost him familiarly 
on the forecastle and lower deck, with his arms folded, and 
with an air almost amounting to superiority. At last, Jack 
told him to go about his business, and not to presume to talk 
to him, whereupon Easthupp rejoined, and after an exchange 
of hard words, it ended by Jack’s kicking Mr. Easthupp, as he 
called himself, down the after-lower-deck hatchway. This was 
but a sorry specimen of Jack’s equality — and Mr. Easthupp, 
who considered that his honour had been compromised, went 
up to the captain on the quarter deck, and lodged his com- 
plaint — whereupon Captain Wilson desired that Mr. Easy 
might be summoned. 

As soon as Jack made his appearance, Captain Wilson 
called to Easthupp. “ Now, purser’s steward, what is tliis you 
have to say ?” 

“ If you please, Captain Yilson, I am wery sorry to be 
obliged to make hany complaint of hany hofficer, but this Mr. 
Heasy thought proper to make use of language quite hunbe- 
coming of a gentleman, and then to kick me as I vent down the 
atchvay.” 

“Well, Mr. Easy, is this true?’' 

“Yes, sir,” replied Jack ; “I have several times told the 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


93 


fellow not to address himself to me, and he will. I did tell 
him he was a radical blackguard, and I did kick him down the 
hatchway.” 

“You told him he was a radical blackguard, Mr. Easy !” 

“ Yes, sir : he comes bothering me about his republic, 
and asserting that we have no want of a king and aristoc- 
racy.” 

Captain Wilson looked significantly at Mr. Sawbridge. 

il I certainly did hoffer my political opinions, Captain Yilson; 
but you must be avare that ve hall ave an hequal stake in the 
country — and it’s a Hinglishman’s birthright.” 

“ I’m not aware what your stake in the country may be, Mr. 
Easthupp,” observed Captain Wilson, “ but I think that if you 
used such expressions, Mr. Easy was fully warranted in telling 
you his opinion.” 

“ I ham villing, Captain Yilson, to make hany hallowance for 
the eat of political discussion — but that is not hall that I ave 
to complain hof. Mr. Heasy thought proper to say that I was 
a swindler and a liar.” 

“ Did you make use of those expressions, Mr. Easy ?” 

“Yes, sir, he did,” continued the steward, “ and, moreover, 
told me not to cheat the men, and not to cheat my master, the 
purser. Now, Captain Yilson, is it not true that I am in a 
wery hostensible sitevation ? but I flatter myself that I ave 
been veil educated, and vas wonce moving in a wery different 
society — misfortains vill appin to us hall, and I feel my charac- 
ter has been severely injured by such impertations whereupon 
Mr. Easthupp took out his handkerchief, flourished, and blew 
his nose. “ I told Mr. Heasy, that I considered myself quite 
as much of a gentleman as himself, and at hall hewents did not 
keep company with a black feller, (Mr. Heasy will understand 
the insinevation,) vereupon Mr. Heasy, as I before said, your 
vorship, I mean you, Captain Yilson, thought proper to kick 
me down the atchvay.” 

“ Yery well, steward, I have heard your complaint, and now 
vou may go.” 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


94 

Mr. Easthupp took Iris hat off with an air, made his bow, 
and went down the main ladder. 

“ Mr. Easy,” said Captain Wilson, “you must be aware, that 
by the regulations of the service by which we are all equally 
bound, it is not permitted that any officer shall take the law 
into his own hands. Now, although I do not consider it neces- 
sary to make any remark as to your calling the man a radical 
blackguard, for I consider his impertinent intrusion of his opin- 
ions deserved it, still you have no right to attack any man's 
character without grounds — and as that man is in an office of 
trust, you were not at all warranted in asserting that he was a 
cheat. Will you explain to me why you made use of such lan- 
guage ?” 

Now our hero had no proofs against the man ; he had no- 
thing to offer in extenuation, until he recollected, all at once, 
the reason assigned by the captain for the language used by 
Mr. Sawbridge. Jack had the wit to perceive that it would 
hit home, so he replied, very quietly and respectfully, — 

“ If you please, Captain Wilson, that was all zeal.” 

“ Zeal,- Mr. Easy ? I think it but a bad excuse. But pray, 
then, why did you kick the man down the hatclrway — you 
must have known that that was contrary to the rules of the 
service.” 

“Yes sir,” replied Jack, demurely, “but that was all zeal, 
too.” 

“ Then allow me to say,” replied Captain Wilson, biting his 
lips, “that I think that your zeal has in this instance been 
very much misplaced, and I trust you will not show so much 
again.” 

“ And yet, sir,” replied Jack, aw T are that he was giving the 
captain a hard hit, and therefore looked proportionally humble, 
“ we should do nothing in the service without it — and I trust 
one day, as you told me, to become a very zealous officer.” 

“ I trust so too, Mr. Easy,” replied the captain. “ There 
you may go now, and let me hear no more of kicking people 
clown the hatchway. That sort of zeal is misplaced.” 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


95 


“ More than my foot was, at all events,” muttered Jack, as 
he walked off. 

Captain Wilson, as soon as onr kero disappeared, laughed 
heartily, and told Mr. Sawbridge “ he had ascribed his lan- 
guage to our hero as all zeal. — He has very cleverly given me it 
all back again ; and really, Sawbridge, as it proves how weak 
was my defence of you, you may gain from this lesson.” 

Sawbridge thought so too — but both agreed that Jack’s 
rights of man were in considerable danger. 

The day before the ship sailed, the captain and Mr. Asper 
dined with the governor, and as there was little more to do, 
Mr. Sawbridge, who had not quitted the ship since she had 
been in port, and had some few purchases to make, left her iu 
the afternoon in the charge of Mr. Smallsole, the master. Now, 
as we have observed, he was Jack’s inveterate enemy — indeed 
Jack had already made three, Mr. Smallsole, Mr. Biggs, the 
boatswain, and Eastkupp, the purser’s steward. Mr. Smallsole 
was glad to be left in command, as he hoped to have an oppor- 
tunity of punishing our hero, who certainly laid himself not a 
little open to it. 

Like all those who are seldom in command, the master was 
proportionally tyrannical and abusive; he swore at the men, 
made them do the duty twice and thrice over, on the pretence 
that it was not smartly done, and found fault with every offi- 
cer remaining on board. 

“Mr. Biggs — by God, sir, you seem to be all asleep for- 
ward; I suppose you think that you are to do nothing, now the 
first lieutenant is out of the ship ? How long will it be, sir, 
before you are ready to sway away ?” 

“By de holy poker, I tink he sway away finely, Massa 
Easy,” observed Mesty, who was in converse with our hero on 
the forecastle. 

Mr. Smallsole’s violence made Mr. Biggs violent, which 
made the boatswain’s mate violent — and the captain of the 
forecastle violent also; all which is practically exemplified by 
philosophy in the laws of motion, communicated from one body 


96 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


to another : and as Mr. Smallsole swore, so did the boatswain 
swear — also the boatswain’s mate, the captain of the forecastle, 
and all the men; showing the force of example. 

Mr. Smallsole came forward — “ Damnation, Mr. Biggs, what 
the devil are you about ? Can’t you move here ?” 

“ As much as we can, sir,” replied the boatswain, “lumbered 
as the forecastle is with idlers;” — and here Mr. Biggs looked 
at our hero and Mesty, who were standing against the bulwark. 

“ What are you doing here, sir ?” cried Mr. Smallsole to our 
hero. 

“ Nothing at all, sir,” replied Jack. 

“Then I’ll give you something to do, sir. Go up to the 
mast-head, and wait there till I call you down. Come, sir, I’ll 
show you the way,” continued the master, walking aft. Jack 
followed till they were on the quarter-deck. 

“Now, sir, up to the main-top gallant mast-head; perch 
yourself upon the cross trees — up with you.” 

“ What am I to go up there for, sir ?” inquired Jack. 

“ For punishment, sir,” replied the master. 

“ What have I done, sir ?” 

“No reply, sir — up with you.” 

“ If you please, sir,” replied Jack, “ I should wish to argue 
this point a little.” 

“Argue the point,” roared Mr. Smallsole. “By Jove, I’ll 
teach you to argue the point — away with you, sir.” 

“ If you please, sir,” continued Jack, “ The Captain told me 
that the articles of war were the rules and regulations by which 
every one in the service was to be guided. Now, sir,” said 
Jack, “ I have read them over till I know them by heart, and 
there is not one word of mastheading in the whole of them.” 
Here Jack took the articles out of his pocket, and unfolded 
them. 

“Will you go to the mast-head, sir, or will you not ?” said 
Mr. Smallsole. 

“ Will you show me the mast-head in the articles of war, sir,” 
replied Jack; “here they are.” 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 9 1 

“ 1 tell you, sir, to go tc the mast-head: if not, PU be d — d 
if I don’t hoist you up in a bread-bag.” 

“ There’s nothing about bread-bags in the articles of war,” 
replied Jack; “but I’ll tell you what there is, sir,” and Jack 
commenced reading — 

“All flag officers, and all persons in or belonging to his 
majesty’s ships or vessels of war, being guilty of profane oaths, 
execrations, drunkenness, uncleanness, or other scandalous ac- 
tions, in derogation of God’s honor, and corruption of good 
manners, shall incur such punishment as ” 

“ Damnation !” cried the master, who was mad with rage, 
hearing that the whole ship’s company were laughing. 

“No, sir, not damnation,” replied Jack; “that’s when he’s 
tried above; but according to the nature and degree of the of- 
fence.” 

“ Will you go to the mast-head, sir, or will you not ?” 

“ If you please,” replied Jack, “ I’d rather not.” 

“Then, sir, consider yourself under an arrest. I’ll try you 
by a court martial, by God. Go down below, sir.” 

“ With the greatest pleasure, sir,” replied Jack; “that’s all 
right, and according to the articles of war, which are to guide 
us all.” Jack folded up his articles of war, put them into his 
pocket, and went down into the berth. 

Soon after Jack had gone down, Jolliffe, who had heard the 
whole of the altercation, followed him: “ My lad,” said Jolliffe, 
“ I’m sorry for all this; you should have gone to the mast-head.” 

“ I should like to argue that point a little,” replied Jack. 

“Yes, so would everybody; but if that were permitted, the 
service would be at a stand still — that would not do. You 
must obey an order first, and then complain afterwards, if the 
order is unjust.” 

“ It is not so in the articles of war.” 

“ But it is so in the service.” 

“ Tfie captain told me that the articles of war were the 
guides of the service, and we were all equallv bound to obey 
them.” 


5 


98 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


“ Well, but allowing that, I do not think your articles of 
war will bear you out. You observe, they say any officer, 
marine, &c., guilty of disobedience to any lawful command. 
Now are you not guilty under that article ?” 

“That remains to be argued still,” replied Jack. “ A law- 
ful command means an order established by law ; now where is 
that law ? — besides, the captain told me when I kicked that 
blackguard down the hatchway, that there was only the cap- 
tain who could punish, and that officers could not take the law 
into their own hands; why, then, has the master ?” 

“ His doing wrong as superior officer is no reason why you, 
as an inferior, should disobey him. If that were permitted — if 
every order were to be cavilled at and argued upon, as just or 
unjust, there would be an end of all discipline. Besides, re- 
collect that in the service there is custom, which is the same as 
xaw.” 

“ That admits of a little argument/'’ replied Jack. 

“ The service will admit of none, my dear boy: recollect, that 
even on shore we have two laws, that which is written, and the 
lex non script a, which is custom; of course we have it in the ser- 
vice, for the articles of war cannot provide for everything.” 

“ They provide a court-martial for everything, though,” re- 
plied Jack. 

“ Yes, with death or dismissal from the service — neither of 
which would be very agreeable. You have got yourself into a 
scrape, and although the captain is evidently your friend, he 
cannot overlook it: fortunately, it is with the master, which is 
of less consequence than with the other officers; but still, you 
will have to submit, for the captain cannot overlook it.” 

“ I’ll tell you what, Jolliffe,” replied Jack, “ my eyes now 
begin to be opened to a great many things. The captain tells 
me, when I am astonished at bad language, that it is all zeal, 
and then I found out that what is all zeal in a superior to an 
inferior, is insolence when reversed. He tells me that the ar- 
ticles of war are made to equally guide us all — the master 
breaks what is positively mentioned in the second article twenty 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


99 • 

times over, and goes scot free, while I am to be punished be- 
cause I do not comply with what the articles do not mention. 
How was I to know that I ought to go to the mast-head for 
punishment ? particularly when the captain tells me that he 
alone is to punish in the ship. If I obey an order, in opposition 
to the captain’s order, is not that as bad as disobeying the cap- 
tain ? I think that I have made out a very strong case, and 
my arguments are not to be confuted.” 

“ I’m afraid that the master will make out a very strong case, 
and that your arguments will never be heard.” 

“ That will be contrary to all the rules of justice.” 

“ But according to all the rules of service.” 

“ I do believe that I am a great fool,” observed Jack, after 
a pause. “ What do you imagine made me come to sea, Jol- 
liffe ?” 

“ Because you did not know when you were well off,” replied 
the mate, drily. 

“ That’s true enough; but my reason was, because I thought 
I should find that equality here that I could not find on shore.” 

Jolliffe stared. 

“ My dear boy, I heard you say that you obtained those 
opinions from your father ; I mean no disrespect to him, but he 
must be either mad or foolish, if at his age he has not yet dis- 
covered that there is no such thing in existence.” 

“ I begin to think so,” replied Jack ; “ but that does not 
prove that there ought not to be.” 

“ 1 beg your pardon ; the very non-existence proves that 
it ought not to be — 1 whatever is, is right,’ — you might as well 
expect to find perfect happiness or perfection in the individual. 
Your father must be a visionary.” 

“ The best thing that I can do is to go home again.” 

“ No, my dear Easy, the best thing that you can do is, to 
stay in the service, for it will soon put an end to all such non- 
sensical ideas ; and it will make you a clever, sensible fellow. 
The service is a rough, but a good school, where every body 
finds his level— not the level of equality, but the level which 


100 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY 


his natural talent and acquirements will rise or sink him to, in 
proportion as they are plus or minus. It is a noble service, 
but has its imperfections, as every thingin this world must have. 

I have little reason to speak in its favour, as far as I am con- 
concerned, for it has been hard bread to me, but there must be 
exceptions in every rule. Do not think of quitting the service 
until you have given it a fair trial. I am aware that you are 
an only son, and your father is a man of property, and, there- 
fore, in the common parlance of the world, you are independent; 
but, believe me, no man, however rich, is independent, unless 
he has a profession, and you will find ‘no better than this, not- ' 

withstanding ” 

. “What?” 

“ That you will be, most certainly, sent to the masthead to- 
morrow.” 

“ We’ll argue that point,” replied Jack ; “at all events, I 
will go and turn in to-night.” 


CHAPTER XIII. 

IN WHICH OUR HERO BEGINS TO ACT AND THINK FOR HIMSELF. 

Whatever may have been Jack’s thoughts, at all events, they 
did not spoil his rest. He possessed in himself all the materials 
of a true philosopher, but there was a great deal of weeding 
still required. J olliffe’s arguments, sensible as they were, had 
very little effect upon him ; for, strange to say, it is much 
more easy to shake a man’s opinions when he is wrong, than 
when he is right ; proving that we are all of a very perverse 
nature. “ Well,” thought Jack, “if I am to go to the mast- 
head, I am, that’s all ; but it does not prove that my arguments 
are not good, only that they will not be listened to and then 
Jack shut his eyes, and in a few minutes was fast asleep. 

The master had reported to the first-lieutenant, and the first- 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


101 


lieutenant to the captain, when he came on board the next 
morning, the conduct of Mr. Easy, who was sent for in the 
cabin, to hear if he had any thing to offer in extenuation of his 
offence. Jack made an oration, which lasted more than half 
an hour, in which all the arguments he had brought forward 
to Jolliffe in the preceding chapter, were entered fully into. 
Mr. Jolliffe was then examined, and also Mr. Smallsole was 
interrogated : after which the captain and the first-lieutenant 
were left alone. 

“ Sawbridge,” said Captain Wilson, “ how true it is, that any 
deviation from what is right invariably leads us into a scrape. 
I have done wrong : wishing to get this boy out of his father’s 
hands, and fearful that he would not join the ship, and imagin- 
ing him to be by no means the shrewd fellow that he is in 
reality, I represented the service in a much more favourable 
light than I should have done ; all that he says I told him I 
did tell him, and it is I who really led the boy into error. Mr. 
Smallsole has behaved tyrannically and unjustly ; he punished 
the lad for no crime ; so that what between the master and me, 
I am now on the horns of a dilemma. If I punish the boy, I 
feel that I am punishing him more for my own fault and the 
fault of others, than his own. If I do not punish him, I allow 
a flagrant and open violation of discipline to pass uncensured, 
which will be injurious to the service.” 

“ He must be punished, sir,” replied Sawbridge. 

“ Send for him,” said the captain. 

Jack made his appearance, with a very polite bow. 

“ Mr. Easy, as you suppose that the articles of war contained 
all the rules and regulations of the service, I take it for granted 
that you have erred through ignorance. But recollect, that 
although you have erred through ignorance, such a violation of 
discipline, if passed unnoticed, will have a very injurious effect 
with the men, whose obedience is enforced by the example 
shown to them by the officers. I feel so convinced of your zeal, 
which you showed the other day in the case of Easthupp, that 
I am sure you will see the propriety of my proving to the men, 


102 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


by punishing you, that discipline must be enforced, and I shall 
therefore send for you on the quarter-deck, and order you to go 
to the mast-head in presence of the ship’s company, as it was in 
presence of the ship’s company that you refused.” 

“ With the greatest pleasure, Captain Wilson,” replied Jack. 

“ And in future, Mr. Easy, although I shall ever set my face 
against it, recollect that if any officer punishes you, and you 
imagine that you are unfairly treated, you will submit to the 
punishment, and then apply to me for redress.” 

“ Certainly, sir,” replied Jack, “ now that I am aware of 
your wishes.” 

“You will oblige me, Mr. Easy, by going on the quarter- 
deck, and wait there till I come up.” 

“ Jack made his best bow, and exit. 

“ Old Jolliffe told me that I should have to go,” said Jack to 
himself, “ and he was right, so far ; but hang me if I iiadn’t 
the best of the argument, and that’s all I care about.” 

Captain Wilson sent for the master, and reprimanded him 
for his oppression, as it was evident that there was no ground 
for punishment, and he forbade him ever to mast-head another 
midshipman, but to report his conduct to the first-lieutenant or 
himself. He then proceeded to the quarter-deck, and, calling 
for Mr. Easy, gave him what appeared to be a very severe 
reprimand, which Jack looked upon very quietly, because it was 
all zeal on the captain’s part to give it, and all zeal on his own 
to take it. Our hero was then ordered up to the mast-head. 

J ack took off his hat, and took three or four steps, in obedi- 
ence to the order — and then returned and made his best bow — 
inquired of Captain Wilson whether he wished him to go to the 
fore or to the main-mast head. 

“ To the main, Mr. Easy,” replied the captain, biting his lips. 

Jack ascended three spokes of the Jacob’s ladder, when he 
again stopped, and took off his hat. 

“ I beg your pardon, Captain Wilson — you have not informed 
me whether it is your wish that I should go to the topmast, or 
the top-gallant cross-trees.” 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


103 


“To the top-gallant cross-trees, Mr. Easy,” replied the cap- 
tain. 

Jack ascended, taking it very easy : he stopped at the main- 
top for breath ; at the main-topmast head, to look about him ; 
and, at last, gained the spot agreed upon, where he seated him- 
self, and, taking out the articles of war, commenced them again, 
to ascertain whether he could not have strengthened his argu- 
ments. He had not, however, read through the seventh arti- 
cle before the hands were turned up — “ up anchor !” and Mr. 
Sawbridge called, “All hands down from aloft?” Jack took 
the hint, folded up his documents, and came down as leisurely 
as he went up. Jack was a much better philosopher than his 
father. 

The Harpy was soon under way, and made all sail, steering 
for Cape de Gatte, where Captain Wilson hoped to pick up a 
Spanish vessel or two, on his way to Toulon to receive the 
orders of the admiral. 

A succession of light breezes and calms rendered the passage 
very tedious ; but the boats were constantly out, chasing the 
vessels along shore, and Jack usually asked to be employed on 
this service : indeed, although so short a time afloat, he was, 
from his age and strength, one of the most effective midshipmen, 
and to be trusted, provided a whim did not come into his head ; 
but hitherto Jack had always been under orders, and had 
always acquitted himself very well. 

When the Harpy was off Tarragona, it so happened that 
there were several cases of dysentery in the ship, and Mr. Asper 
and Mr. Jolliflfe were two of those who were suffering. This 
reduced the number of officers ; and, at the same time, they 
had received information from the men of a fishing-boat, who, 
to obtain their own release, had given the intelligence, that a 
small convoy was coming down from Rosas as soon as the wind 
was fair, under the protection of two gun-boats. 

Captain Wilson kept well off-shore until the wind changed, 
and then, allowing for the time that the vessels would take to 
run down the distance between- Tarragona and Rosas, steered 


104 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


in the night to intercept them ; but it again fell calm, and the 
boats were therefore hoisted out, with directions to proceed 
along the shore, as it was supposed that the vessels could not 
now be far distant. Mr. Sawbridge had the command of the 
expedition in the pinnace ; the first cutter was in charge of the 
gunner, Mr. Minus ; and, as the other officers were sick, Mr. Saw- 
bridge, who liked Jack more and more every day, at his particu- 
lar request, gave him the command of the second cutter. As soon 
as he heard of it, Mesty declared to our hero that he would go 
with him ; but without permission that was not possible. J ack 
obtained leave for Mesty to go in lieu of a marine : there were 
many men sick of -the dysentery, and Mr. Sawbridge was not 
sorry to take an idler out of the ship instead of a working man, 
especially as Mesty was known to be a good hand. 

It was ten o’clock at night when the boats quitted the ship ; 
and, as it was possible that they might not return till late the 
next day, one day’s biscuit and rum were put on board each, 
that the crews might not suffer from exhaustion. The boats 
pulled in shore, and then coasted for three hours, without see- 
ing anything : the night was fine overhead, but there was no 
moon. It still continued calm, and the men began to feel 
fatigued, when just as they were within a mile of a low point, 
they perceived the convoy over the land, coming down with 
their sails squared, before a light breeze. 

Mr. Sawbridge immediately ordered the boats to lie upon 
their oars, awaiting their coming, and arranging for the 
attack. * 

The white lateen sails of the gun-boat in advance were now 
plainly^Listinguishable from the rest, which were all huddled 
together in her wake. Down she came like a beautiful swan 
n the water, her sails just filled with the wind, and running 
about three knots an hour. Mr. Sawbridge kept her three 
masts in one, that they might not be perceived, and winded the 
boats with their heads the same way, so that they might dash 
on board of her with a few strokes of the oars. So favourable 
was the course of the gun-boat, that she stood right between 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


105 


the launch on one bow and the two cutters on the other ; and 
they were not perceived until they were actually alongside ; the 
resistance was trifling, but some muskets and pistols had been 
fired, and the alarm was given. Mr. Sawbridge took possession, 
with the crew of the launch, and brought the vessel to the 
wind, as he perceived that at the alarm all the convoy had 
done the same, directing the cutters to board the largest ves- 
sels, and secure as many as they could, while he would do the 
same with the launch, as he brought them to : but the other 
gun-boat, which had not yet been seen, and had been forgotten, 
now made her appearance, and came down in a gallant manner 
to the support of her comrade. 

Mr. Sawbridge threw half his men into the launch, as she 
carried a heavy carronade, and sent her to assist the cutters, 
which had made right for the gun-boat. A smart firing of 
round and grape was opened upon the boats, which continued 
to advance upon her ; but the officer commanding that gun- 
boat, finding that he had no support from his consort, and con- 
cluding that she had been captured, hauled his wind again, and 
stood out in the offing. Our hero pulled after her, although he 
could not see the other boats ; but the breeze had freshened, 
and all pursuit was useless : he therefore directed his course to 
the convoy, and, after a hard pull, contrived to get on board 
of a one-masted xebeque, of about fifty tons. Mesty, who had 
eyes as sharp as a needle, had observed that when the alarm 
was given, several of the convoy had not rounded the point, 
and he therefore proposed, as this vessel was very light, that 
they should make short tacks with her, to weather the point, 
as if they were escaping, and by that means be able, particu- 
larly if it fell calm again, to capture some others. J ack tnought 
this advice good. The convoy who had rounded the point, 
had all stood out to seaward with the gun-boat, and had 
now a fresh breeze. To chase them was therefore useless ; 
and the only chance, was to do as Mesty had proposed. He 
therefore stood out into the breeze, and, after half an hour, 
tacked in shore, and fetched well to windward of the low 

5 * 


106 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


point ; but finding no vessels, he stood out again. Thus had 
he made three or four tacks, and had gained, perhaps, six or 
seven miles, when he perceived signals of recall made to lee- 
ward, enforced with guns. 

“ Mr. Sawbridge wants us to come back, Mesty.’' 

“ Mr. Sawbridge mind him own business,” replied Mesty, 
“we nebber take all dis trubble to ply to windward for 
nothing.” 

“ But, Mesty, we must obey orders.” 

“Yes, sar, when he have him thumb upon you ; but now, 
must do what tink most proper. By de powers, he catch me 
'fore I go back.” 

“ But we shall lose the ship.” 

“ Find her again, by-and-bye, Massa Easy.” 

“ But they will think that w r e are lost.” 

“ So much the better, nebba look after us, Massa Easy ; I 
guess we have a fine cruise any how. Morrow we take large 
vessel — make sail, take more, den we go to Toulon.” 

“ But I don't know my way to Toulon ; I know it lies up 
this way, and that's all.” 

“ Dat enough, what you want more ? Massa Easy, 'pose you 
not find fleet, fleet soon find you. By God, nobody nebba lost 
here. Now, Massa Easy, let um go 'bout gain. Somebody 
else burn biscuit and boil kettle to-morrow for de gentlemen. 
Murder Irish ! only tink, Massa Easy — I boil kettle, and prince, 
in my own country !” 

Easy was very much of a mind with Mesty ; “ for,” argued 
Jack, “if I go back now, I only bring a small vessel half full 
of beans, and I shall be ashamed to show my face. Now it is 
true, that they may suppose that we have been sunk by the 
fire of the gun-boat. Well, what then ? they have a gun-boat 
to show for their night's work, and it will appear that there 
was harder fighting than there has been, and Mr. Sawbridge 
may benefit by it.” (Jack was a very knowing fellow to have 
learnt so much about the service already.) “Well, and when 
they discover that we are not lost, how glad they will be to 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


107 

find us, especially if we bring some prizes — which I will do, or 
I’ll not go back again. It’s not often that one gets a command 
before being two months at sea, and, hang me, now I’ve got it 
if I won’t keep it ; and Mr. Smallsole may mast-head whom he 
pleases. I’m sorry for poor Gossett though ; if Vigors sup- 
poses me dead how he will murder the poor little fellow — how- 
ever, it’s all for the good of the service, and I’ll revenge him 
when I come back. Hang me if I won’t take a cruise.” 

“ I talk to the men, they say they all tick to you like leech. 
Now dat job settled, I tink we better go ’bout again.” 

A short time after this decision on the part of our hero, the 
day broke : Jack first looked to leeward, and perceived the 
gun-boat and convoy standing in for the shore about ten miles 
distant, followed by the Harpy, under all sail. He could also 
perceive the captured gun-boat lying to in shore to prevent 
their escape. 

“Harpy hab urn all, by Gosh !” cried Mesty, “I ab notion 
dat she soon settle um hash.” 

They were so busy looking at the Harpy and the convoy, 
that, for some time, they quite forgot to look to windward. At 
last Mesty turned his eyes that way. 

“ Dam um, I see right last night ; look, Massa Easy — one 
chip, one brig tree lateen — deift for us. By de power, but we 
make Ion prize to-night.” 

“ The vessels found out by Mesty were not above three 
miles to windward ; they were under all sail, beating up for the 
protection of a battery, not far distant. 

“Now, Massa, suppose they see our boat, dey tink some- 
thing ; keep boat alongside, and shift her when we go ’bout 
every time : better not sail so fast now — keep further off till 
they drop anchor for de night ; and then, when it dark, we 
take ’em.” 

All Mesty’s advice was good, with the exception, perhaps, 
of advising our hero how to disobey orders and take a cruise. 
To prevent the vessel from approaching^too near the others, 
and at the same time, to let her have the appearance of doing 


108 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


her best, a sail was towed overboard under the bows, and aftei 
that, they watched the motions of the Harpy. 

The distance was too great to distinguish very clearly, but 
Mesty shinned up the mast of the vessel, and reported pro- 
gress. 

“By Jesus, dare one gun — two gun — go it Harpy. Won’t 
she ab um, sure enough. Now gun-boat fire — dat our gun- 
boat — no, dat not ours. Now, our gun-boat fire — dat pretty 
— fire away. Ah, now de Harpy cum up. All ’rnung ’em. 
Bung, bung, bung — rattle de grape, by gosh. I ab notion de 
Spaniard is very pretty considerable trouble just now, any 
how. All hove to, so help me gosh — not more firing ; Harpy 
take um all — dare gun-boat hove to, she strike um colours. By 
all powers, but suppose dey tink we no share prize-mony — they 
find it not little mistake. Now, my lads, it all over, and,” 
continued Mesty, sliding down the mast, “I tink you better 
not show yourself too much ; only two men stay on deck, and 
dem two take off um jackets.” 

Mesty’s report was correct ; the Harpy had captured the 
other gun-boat, and the whole convoy. The only drawback to 
their good fortune was the disappearance of Mr. Easy and the 
cutter; it was supposed that a shot from the gun-boat must have 
sunk her, and that the whffle*crew were drowned. Captain 
Wilson and Mr. Sawbridge seriously regretted the loss of our 
hero, as they thought that he would have turned out a shining 
character as soon as he had sown his wild oats ; so did Mr. 
Asper, because our hero’s purse went with him ; so did Jolliffe, 
because he had taken an affection for him ; so did little Gos- 
sett, because he anticipated no mercy from Vigors. On the 
other hand, there were some who were glad that he was gone ; 
and as for the ship’s company in general, they lamented the 
loss of the poor cutter’s crew for twenty-four hours, which, iu 
ft man-of-war, is a very long while, and then they thought no 
more about them. We must leave the Harpy to make the 
best of her way to Toulon, and now follow our hero. 

The cutter’s crew knew very well that Jack was acting 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


10S 

contrary to orders, but any thing was to them a change from 
the monotony of a man-of-war ; and they, as well as Mesty, 
highly approved of a holiday. 

It was, however, necessary that they should soon proceed 
to business, . for they had but their allowance of bread and 
grog for one day, and in the vessel they found nothing except 
a few heads of garlic, for the Spaniards coasting down shore 
had purchased their provisions as they required them. There 
were only three prisoners on board, and they had been put 
down in the hold among the beans ; a bag of which had been 
roused on deck, and a part put into the kettle to make soup. 
Jack did not much admire the fare of the first day — it was bean- 
soup for breakfast, bean-soup for dinner, and if you felt hungry 
during the intervals it was still bean-soup, and nothing else. 

One of the men could speak a little Lingua Franca, and the 
prisoners were interrogated as to the vessels to windward. 
The ship was stated to be valuable, and also one of the brigs. 
The ship carried guns, and that was all that they knew 
about them. As the sun went down the vessels dropped their 
anchors off the battery. The breeze continued light, and the 
vessel which contained Jack and his fortunes was about four 
miles to leeward. As for the Harpy, they had long lost sight 
of her, and it was now time to proceed to some arrangement. 
As soon as it was dark Jack turned his hands up and made a 
very long speech. He pointed out to the men that his zeal 
had induced him not to return to the ship until he had brought 
something with him worth having — that they had had nothing 
but beans to eat during the whole day, which was anything 
but agreeable, and that, therefore, it was absolutely necessary 
that they should better their condition : that there was a 
large ship not four miles off, and that he intended to take 
her ; and as soon as he had taken her he intended to take 
some more ; that he trusted to their zeal to support him on 
this occasion, and that he expected to do a great deal during 
the cruise. He pointed out to them, that they must consider 
themselves as on board of a man-of-war, and be guided by the 


110 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


articles of war, which were written for them all — and that in 
case they forget them he had a copy in his pocket, which he 
would read to them to-morrow morning, as soon as they were 
comfortably settled on board of the ship. He then appoint- 
ed Mesty as first lieutenant ; the marine as sergeant ; the 
cockswain as boatswain ; two men as midshipmen to keep 
watch ; two others as boatswain’s mates, leaving two more 
for the ship’s company, who were divided into the larboard and 
starboard watch. The cutter’s crew were perfectly content 
with Jack’s speech, and their brevet rank, and after that, they 
commenced a more important topic, which was, how they were 
to take the ship. After some discussion, Mesty’s advice was 
approved of ; which was, that they should anchor not far 
ahead of the ship, and wait till about two o’clock in the 
morning, when they would drop silently down upon her in the 
cutter, and take possession. 

About nine o’clock, the vessel was anchored as they pro- 
posed, and Jack was a little astonished to find that the ship 
was much larger than he had any idea of ; for, although 
polacca-rigged, she was nearly the same tonnage as the Harpy. 
The Spanish prisoners" were first tied hand and foot, and laid 
upon the beans, that they might give no alarm, the sails were 
furled, and all was kept quiet. 

On board of the ship, on the contrary, there was noise and 
revelry ; and about half past ten a boat was seen to leave her 
and pull for the shore ; after which the noise gradually ceased, 
the lights, one by one, disappeared, and then all was silent. 

“ What do you think, Mesty ?” said Jack, “ do you think 
we shall take her ?” 

“ It is take her you mane ; sure enough we’ll take her, stop 
a bit — wait till um all fast asleep.” 

About twelve o’clock there came on a mizzling heavy rain, 
which was very favourable for our hero’s operations. But as 
it promised soon to clear up, by Mesty’s advice, they did not 
delay any longer. They crept softly into the boat, and with 
two oars to steer her, dropped under the bows of the vessel, 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


Ill 


2limbed up the fore chains, and found the deck empty. “ Take 
care not to fire pistol,” said Mesty to the men, as they came 
up, putting his -finger to their lips to impress them with the 
necessity of silence, for Mesty had been an African warrior, and 
knew the advantage of surprise. All the men being on deck, 
and the boat made fast, Jack and Mesty led the way aft ; not 
a soul was to be seen : indeed it was too dark to see anybody 
unless they were walking the deck. The companion-hatch was 
secured, and the gratings laid on the after hatch-ways, and 
then they went aft to the binnacle again, where there was a 
light burning. Mesty ordered two of the men to go forward 
to secure the hatches, and then to remain there on guard — and 
then the rest of the men and our hero consulted at the wheel. 

“ By the power we ab the ship !” said Mesty, “ but must 
manage plenty yet. I tink der some d — n lazy rascal asleep 
Tween the guns. A lilly while it no rain, and den we see 
better. Now, keep all quiet.” 

“ There must be a great many men in this ship,” replied our 
hero ; “ she is very large, and has twelve or fourteen guns — 
how shall we manage to secure them ?” 

“All right,” replied Mesty, “manage all dat by-and-bye. 
Don’t care how soon daylight come.” 

“ It has left off raining already,” observed Easy ; “ there is 
a candle in the binnacle, — suppose we light it and look round 
the decks.” 

“ Yes,” replied Mesty, “ one man sentry over cabin-hatch, 
and another over after-hatch. Now den we light candle, and 
all the rest go round the deck. Mind you leave all your pistols 
on capstern.” 

Jack lighted the candle, and they proceeded round the 
decks : they had not walked far, when, between two of the 
guns, they discovered a heap covered with gregos. “There 
de watch” whispered Mesty ; “all fast — not ready for dem 
yet.” 

“ Mesty blew out the candle, and they all retreated to the 
binnacle, where Mesty took out a coil of the ropes about the 


112 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


mizen-mast, and cutting it into lengths, gave them to the othei 
men to unlay. In a few minutes they had prepared a great 
many seizings to tie the men with. 

“Now den we light candle again, and make sure of them 
lazy hounds,” said Mesty ; “ very much oblige to dem all de 
same ; they let us take de ship — mind now, wake one at a 
time, and shut him mouth.” 

“But suppose they get their mouths free, and cry out?” 
replied Jack. 

“Ben, Mr. Easy,” replied Mesty, changing his countenance 
to an expression almost demoniacal — “ there no help for it,” — 
and Mesty showed his knife, which he held in his right hand. 

“ Oh no ! do not let us murder them.” 

“No, massa — suppose can help it; but suppose they get 
upper hand — what become of us ? Spaniards hab knives, and 
use dem too, by de power !” 

The observation of Mesty was correct, and the expression of 
his countenance when he showed his knife proved what a relent- 
less enemy he could be, if his blood was once roused — but 
Mesty had figured in the Ashantee wars in former days, and 
after that the reader need not be surprised. They proceeded 
cautiously to where the Spaniards lay. The arrangements of 
Mesty were very good. There were two men to gag them, 
while the others were to tie their limbs. Mesty and Easy were 
to kneel by them with the candle, with raised knives to awe 
them into silence, or to strike home, if their own safety 
required it. 

The gregos were removed off the first man, who opened his 
eyes at the sight of the candle, but the coxswain’s hand was on 
his mouth — he was secured in silence. The other two men 
were awaked, and threw off their coverings, but they were*also 
secured without there being occasion to resort to bloodshed. 

“ What shall we do now, Mesty ?” 

“ Now, sar,” said Mesty, “ open the after-hatch and watch — 
suppose more men come up, we make them fast ; suppose no 
more come up, we wait till daylight — and see what take place,” 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


113 


Mesty then went forward to see if the men were watchful on 
the forecastle ; and having again gone round the whole of the 
deck to see if there were any more men on it, he blew out the 
candle, and took his station with the others at the after-hatchway. 

It was just at break of day that the Spaniards who had to 
keep the morning watch having woke up, as people generally 
do at that hour at which they expect to be called, dressed 
themselves, and came on deck, imagining, and very truly, that 
those of the middle watch had fallen asleep, but little imagin- 
ing that the deck was in possession of Englishmen. Mesty and 
the others retreated, to allow them all to come up befor’e they 
could perceive them, and fortunately this was accomplished. 
Four men came on the deck, looked round them, and tried to 
make out in the dark where their shipmates might be. The 
grating was slapped on again by Jack, and before they could 
well gain their eyesight, they were seized and secured, not, 
however, without a^scuffle and some noise. 

By the time that these men were secured and laid between 
the guns it was daylight, and they now perceived what a fine 
vessel they had fairly taken possession of — but there was much 
to be done yet. There was, of course, a number of men in the 
ship, and moreover, they were not a mile from a battery of ten 
guns. Mesty, who was foremost in everything, left four men 
abaft, and went forward on the forecastle, examined the cable, 
which was coir rope, and therefore easily divided, and then 
directed the two men forward to coil a hawser upon the fore- 
grating, the weight of which would make all safe in that quar- 
ter, and afterwards to join them on the quarter-deck. 

“Now, Mr. Easy, the great ting will be to get hold of cap- 
tain ; we must get him on deck. Open cabin-hatch now, and 
keep the after-hatch fast. Two men stay there, the others all 
come aft.” 

“ Yes,” replied Jack, “ it will be a great point to secure the 
captain — but how are we to get him up ?” 

“ You no know how to get captain up ? By de holy, I know 
very well.” 


114 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


And Mesty took up the coils of rope about the mizen-mast, 
and threw them upon deck, one after another, making all the 
noise possible. In a short time, there was a violent pull of a 
bell at the cabin-door, and in a minute afterwards a man in his 
shirt came up the cabin-hatchway, who was immediately 
secured. 

“Dis de captain’s servant,” said Mesty, “he come say no 
make such d — d noise. Stop a little — captain get in passion, 
and come up himself.” 

And Mesty renewed the noise with the ropes over the cabin. 
Mesty was right ; in a few minutes the captain himself came 
up, boiling with indignation. At the sound of the cabin-door 
opening, the seamen and our hero concealed themselves behind 
the companion-hatch, which was very high, so as to give the 
captain time to get fairly on deck. The men already secured 
had been covered over with the gregos. The captain was a 
most powerful man, and it was with difficulty that he was 
pinioned, and then not without his giving the alarm, had there 
been any one to assist him, but as yet no one had turned out of 
his hammock. 

“ Now we all right,” said Mesty, “ and soon ab de ship ; but 
I must make him ’fraid.” 

The captain was seated down on the deck against one of the 
guns, and Mesty, putting on the look of a demon, extended 
above him his long nervous arm, with the sharp knife clutched, 
as if ready every instant to strike it into his heart. The Span- 
ish captain felt his situation anything but pleasant. He was 
then interrogated as to the number of men in the ship, officers, 
&c., to all which questions he answered truly ; he cast his eyes 
at the firm and relentless countenance of Mesty, who appeared 
but to wait the signal. 

“ I tink all pretty safe now,” said Mesty. “ Mr. Easy, we 
now go down below, and beat all men into the hold.” 

Our hero approved of this suggestion. Taking their pistols 
from the capstern, they rushed down with their cutlasses, and 
leaving two men to guard the cabin-door, they were soon 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


115 


among the crew, who were all naked in their hammocks : the 
resistance, although the numbers were more than double of the 
English, was of course trifling. In a few minutes, the Spaniards 
were all thrown down into the hold of the vessel, and the 
hatches placed over them. Every part of the ship was now in 
their possession except the cabin, and to that they all repaired. 
Our hero tried the door, and found it fast ; they beat it open, 
and were received with loud screams from one side of the cabin, 
and the discharge of two pistols from the other, fortunately 
without injury : those who had fired the pistols were an elderly 
man and a lad about the age of our hero. They were thrown 
down and secured ; the cabin was searched, and nobody else 
found in it but three women ; one old and shrivelled, the other 
two, although with their countenances distorted with terror, 
were lovely as Ilouris. So thought Jack, as he took off his 
hat, and made them a very low bow with his usual politeness, 
as they crouched, half dressed, in a corner. He told them in 
English that they had nothing to fear, and begged that they 
would attend to their toilettes. The ladies made no reply, 
because, in the first place, they did not know what Jack said, 
and in the next, they could not speak English. 

Mesty interrupted Jack in his attentions, by pointing out 
that they must all go upon deck — so Jack again took off his 
hat and bowed, and then followed his men, who led away the 
two prisoners taken in the cabin. It was now five o'clock in 
the morning, and there was movement on board of the other 
vessels, which laid not far from the ship. 

“ Now, then,” said Jack, “ what shall we do with the prison- 
ers ? — could we not send the boat, and bring our own vessel 
alongside, and put them all in, tied as they are ? We should 
then get rid of them.” 

“ Massa Easy, you be one very fine officer one of these days. 
Dat d— n good idea, any how ; — but suppose we send our own 
boat, what they tink on board of de oder vessel ? Lower down 
lilly boat from stern, put in four men, and drop vessel 'longside 
• -dat it.” 


iJC) 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


This was done ; the cutter was on the seaward side of the 
ship, and, as the ship was the outermost vessel, was concealed 
from the view of the Spaniards on board of the other vessels^ 
and in the battery on shore. As soon as the lateen vessel was 
alongside, the men who had already been secured on deck, 
amounting to seven, were lowered into her, and laid upon the 
beans in the hold ; all, except the captain, the two cabin-pri- 
soners, and the captain’s servant. They then went down 
below, took off one part of the hatches, and ordered the 
Spaniards up from the hold ; as they came on deck they were 
made fast, and treated in the same manner. Mesty and the 
men went down to examine if there were any left concealed, 
and finding that they were all out, returned on deck. The men 
who had been beaten down in the. hold were twenty-two in 
number, making the whole complement of thirty. As soon as 
they had all been put into the xebeque, she was again hauled 
Off and anchored outside, and Jack found himself in possession 
of a fine ship of fourteen guns, with three prisoners male, and 
three prisoners female. 

When the men returned in the boat from the vessel, in which 
the prisoners had been confined (the hatches having been 
secured over them, by way of further precaution), by the 
advice of Mesty, they put on the jackets and caps of the 
Spanish seamen, of which there was a plentiful supply below. 

“ Now whaffs to be done, Mesty ?” inquired Jack. 

“ Now, sar, we send some of the men aloft to get sails all 
ready, and while they do that I cast loose this fellow,” pointing 
to the captain’s servant, “ and make him get some breakfast, 
for he know where to find it.” 

“ Capital idea of yours, Mesty, for I’m tired of bean- 
soup already, and I will go down and pay my respects to the 
ladies.” 

Mesty looked over the counter. 

“Yes, and be quick too, Massa Easy; d m the women, 

they toss their handkerchief in the air to people in the battery 
—quick, Massa Easv.” 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


m 

Mesty was right — the Spanish girls were waving their hand- 
kerchiefs for assistance ; it was all that they could do, poor 
things. Jack hastened into the cabin, laid hold of the two 
young ladies, very politely pulled them out of the quarter 
glallery, and begged that the^ would not give themselves so 
much trouble. The young ladies looked very much confused, 
and as they could no longer wave their handkerchiefs, they 
put them up to their eyes and began to weep, while the elderly 
lady went on her knees, and held her hands up for mercy. 
Jack raised her up, and very politely handed her to one of the 
cabin lockers. 

In the meantime Mesty, with his gleaming knife and expres- 
sive look, had done wonders with the captain’s steward, for 
such the man was : and a breakfast of chocolate, salt meat, 
hams, and sausages, white biscuit, and red wine, had been 
spread on the quarter-deck. The men had come from aloft, 
and Jack was summoned on deck. Jack offered his hand to 
the two young ladies, and beckoned the old one to follow : the 
old lady did not think it advisable to refuse his courtesy, so 
they accompanied him. 

As soon as the females came on deck, and found the two 
cabin prisoners bound, they ran to them and embraced them 
with tears. Jack’s heart melted, and as there was now no 
fear, he asked Mesty for his knife, and cut loose the two 
Spaniards, pointing to the breakfast, and requesting that they 
would join them. The Spaniards made a bow, and the ladies 
thanked Jack with a sweet smile ; and the captain of the ves- 
.sel, who still lay pinioned against the gun, looked, as much as to 
say, Why the devil don’t you ask me ? But the fact was, they 
had had such trouble to secure him, that Jack did not much 
like the idea of letting him loose again. Jack and the seamen 
commenced their breakfast, and as the ladies and prisoners did 
not appear inclined to eat they ate their share and their own 
too ; during which, the elderly man inquired of Jack if he 
?ould speak French. 

Jack, with his mouth full of sausage, replied that he could; 


118 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


and then commenced a conversation, from which Jack learnt as 
follows : 

The elderly gentleman was a passenger with the young man, 
who was his son, and the ladies, who were his wife and his two 
daughters, and they were proceeding to Tarragona. Where- 
upon Jack made a bow and thanked him; and then the gentle- 
man, whose name was Don Cordova de Kimarosa, wished to 
know what Jack intended to do with them, hoping, as a 
gentleman, he would put them on shore with their effects, as 
they were non-combatants. Jack explained all this to Mesty 
and the men, and then finished his sausage. The men, who 
were a little elevated with the wine which they had been drink- 
ing, proposed that they should take the ladies a cruise, and 
Jack at first did not dislike the idea, but he said nothing; Mesty, 
however, opposed this, saying, that ladies only made a row in 
a ship, and the coxswain sided with him, saying, that they 
should all be at daggers drawn. Whereupon Jack pulled out 
the “ articles of war,” and informed the men, that there was 
no provision in them for women, and therefore the thing was 
impossible. 

The next question was, as to the propriety of allowing them 
to take their effects ; and it was agreed, at last, that they 
might take them. J ack desired the steward to feed his master 
the captain, and then told the Spanish Don the result of the 
consultation ; further informing him, that as soon as it was 
dark, he intended to put them all on board the small vessel, 
when they could cast loose the men, and do as they pleased. 
The Don and the ladies returned thanks, and went down to 
pack up their baggage ; Mesty ordering two men to help them, 
but with a caution, that they were not to encumber themselves 
with any of the money, if there should happen to be any on 
board. 

The crew were busy during the day making preparations for 
sailing. The coxswain had examined the provender in the ship, 
and found that there was enough for at least three months, of 
water, wine, and provisions, independent of luxuries for the 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


119 


cabin. All thoughts of taking any more of the vessels were 
abandoned, for their crew was but weak to manage the one 
which they had possession of. A fine breeze sprang up, and 
they dropped their fore-topsails, just as a boat was shoving off 
from the shore ; but seeing the fore-topsails loosed, it put back 
again. This was fortunate, or all would have been discovered. 
The other vessels also loosed their sails, and the crews were 
heard weighing the anchors. 

But the Nostra Senora del Carmen, which was Jack’s prize, 
did not move. At last the sun went down, the baggage was 
placed in the cutter, the ladies and passengers went into the 
boat, thanking Jack for his kindness, who put his hand to his 
heart and bowed to the deck ; and the captain was lowered 
down after them. Four men well armed pulled them alongside 
of the xebeque, put them and their trunks on deck, and 
returned to the ship. The cutter was then hoisted up, and as 
the anchor was too heavy to weigh, they cut the cable and made 
sail. The other vessels followed their example. Mesty and 
the seamen cast longing eyes upon them, but it was of no use ; 
so they sailed in company for about an hour, and then Jack 
hauled his wind for a cruise. 


CHAPTER XIV. 

IN WHICH OUR HERO FINDS THAT DISAGREEABLE OCCURRENCES 
WILL TAKE PLACE ON A CRUISE. 

As soon as the ship had been hauled to the wind, Jack’s 
ship’s company seemed to think that there was nothing to do 
except to make merry, so they brought up some earthen jars 
full of wine, and emptied them so fast that they were soon fast 
asleep on the deck, with the exception of the man at the helm, 
who, instead of thirty-two, could clearly make out sixty-four 
points to the compass, and of course was able to steer to a 


120 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


much greater nicety. Fortunately, the weather was fine, for 
when the man at the helm had steered till he could see no 
more, and requested to be released, he found that his shipmates 
were so overpowered with fatigue, that it was impossible to 
wake them. He kicked them one by one most unmercifully in 
the ribs, but it was of no use : under these circumstances, he 
did as they did, that is, lay down with them, and in ten minutes 
it would have taken as much kicking to awake him as he gave 
his shipmates. 

In the meantime the ship had it all her own way, and not 
knowing where she was to go, she went round and round the 
compass during the best part of the night. Mesty had 
arranged the watches, Jack had made a speeech, and the men 
had promised everything, but the wine had got into their 
heads, and memory had taken that opportunity to take a stroll. 

Mesty had been down with Jack, examining the cabin, and 
in the captain’s state-room they had found fourteen thousand 
dollars in bags : of this they determined not to tell the men, 
but locked up the money and everything else of value, and took 
out the key. They then sat down at the cabin table, and after 
some conversation, it was no matter of surprise, after having 
been up all the night before, that Jack laid his head on the 
table and fell fast asleep. Mesty kept his eyes open for some 
time, but at last his head sank down upon his chest, and he 
also slumbered. Thus, about one o’clock in the morning, there 
was not a very good watch kept on board of the Nostra Senora 
del Carmen. 

About four o’clock in the morning, Mesty tumbled forward, 
and he hit his head against the table, which roused him up. 

“ By de mass, I tink I almost fall asleep,” cried he, and he 
went to the cabin window, which had been left open, and found 
that there was a strong breeze blowing in. “ By de Lord, de 
wind ab come more aft,” said Mesty, “ why they not tell me ?” 
So saying, he went on deck, where he found no one at the 
helm ; every one drunk, and the ship with her yards braced up 
running before the wind, just by way of a change. Mesty 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


121 


growled, but there was no time to lose ; the topsails only were 
set, — these he lowered down, and then put the helm-a-lea, and 
lashed it, while he went down to call our hero to his assistance. 
Jack roused up, and went on deck. 

“ This nebber do, Massa Easy ; we all go to devil together 
— dam drunken dogs — I freshen um up any how.” So Mesty 
drew some buckets of water, with which he soused the ship’s 
company, who then appeared to be recovering their senses. 

“ By heavens 1” says Jack, “ but this is contrary to the 
‘ articles of war ;’ I shall read them to them to-morrow morn- 
ing.? 

“ I tell what better ting, Massa Easy : we go lock up all de 
wine, and sarve out so much, and no more. I go do it at once, 
Tore they wake up.” 

Mesty went down, leaving Jack on deck to his meditations. 

“ I am not sure,” thought Jack, “ that I have done a very 
wise thing. Here I am with a parcel of fellows who have no 
respect for the articles of war, and who get as drunk as David’s 
sow. I have a large ship, but I have very few hands ; and if 
it comes on bad weather, what shall I do ? — for I know very 
little — hardly how to take in a sail. Then — as for where to 
steer, or how to steer, I know not — nor do any of my men ; 
but, however, as it was very narrow when we came into the 
Mediterranean, through the straits, it is hardly possible to get 
out of them without perceiving it : besides, I should know the 
rock of Gibraltar again, if I saw it. I must talk to Mesty.” 

Mesty soon returned with the keys of the provision-room tied 
to his bandana. 

“ JSTow,” says he, “ they not get drunk again in a hurry ” 

A few more buckets of water soon brought the men to their 
senses : they again stood on their legs, and gradually recovered 
themselves. Daylight broke, and thoy found that the vessel 
had made an attempt for the Spanish coast, being within a 
mile of the beach, and facing a large battery a jimr d’cau ; for- 
tunately they had tinie to square the yards, and steer the 
ship along shore under the topsails, before they were perceived. 

6 


122 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


Had they been seen at daylight in the position that they were 
in during the night, the suspicions of the Spaniards would have 
been awakened ; and had a boat been sent off, while they were 
all drunk, they must have been re-captured. 

The men, who perceived what danger they had been in, lis- 
tened very penitently to Jack’s remonstrances ; and our hero, 
to impress them more strongly on their, minds, took out the 
articles of war, and read that on drunkenness from beginning 
to end ; but the men had heard it read so often at the gang- 
»vay, that it did not make a due impression. As Mesty said, 
his plan was better, and so it proved ; for as soon as Jack had 
done, the men went down to get another jug of wine, and found, 
to their disappointment, that it was all under lock and key. 

In the mean time, Jack called Mesty aft, and asked him if 
he knew the way to Toulon. Mesty declared that he knew 
nothing about it. 

“ Then, Mesty, it appears to me that we have a better 
chance of finding our way back to Gibraltar ; for you know 
the land was on our left side all the way coming up the Medi- 
terranean ; and if we keep it, as it is now, on our right, we 
shall get back again along the coast.” 

Mesty agreed with Jack that this was the plus ultra of 
navigation ; and that old Smallsole could not do better with 
his “pig-yoke” and compasses. So they shook a reef out of 
the topsails, set top-gallant-sails, and ran directly down the 
coast from point to point, keeping about five miles distant. 
The men prepared a good dinner ; Mesty gave them their 
allowance of wine, which was just double what they had on 
board the Harpy — so they soon appeared to be content. One 
man, indeed, talked very big and very mutinously, swearing 
that if the others would join him, they would soon have liquor 
enough ; but Mesty gave him his look, opened his knife, and 
swore that he would settle him, and Jack knocked him down 
with a handspike ; so that, what with the punishment received, 
and that which was promised, the fellow thought he might as 
well say no more about it. The fact is, that had it not been 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


123 


from fear of Mesty, the whole of the men would, in all proba- 
bility, have behaved equally as bad ; nevertheless, they were a 
little staggered, it must be owned, at seeing Jack play so good 
a stick with the handspike. 

After, this night, Jack and Mesty kept watch and watch, and 
every thing went on very well until they were nearly abreast of 
Carthagena, when a gale came on from the northward, and 
drove them out of sight of land. Sail after sail was reduced 
with difficulty from their having so few hands, and the gale 
blew for three days with great fury. The men were tired out 
and discontented. It was Jack’s misfortune that he had but 
one good man with him : even the coxswain of the boat, 
although a fine-looking man, was worth nothing. Mesty was 
Jack’s sheet-anchor. The fourth day the gale moderated, but 
they had no idea where they were : they knew that they had 
been blown off, but how far they could not tell : and Jack now 
began to discover that a cruise at sea without knowledge of 
navigation was a more nervous thing than he had contemplated. 
However, there was no help for it : at night they wore the 
ship, and stood on the other tack, and at daylight they per- 
ceived that they were close to some small islands, and much 
closer to some large rocks, against which the sea beat high^ 
although the wind had subsided. Again was the helm put up, 
and they narrowly escaped. As soon as the sails were trimmed, 
the men came aft, and proposed, that if they could find anchor- 
age, they should run into it, for they were quite tired out. 
This was true ; and Jack consulted with Mesty, who thought 
it advisable to agree to the proposal. That the islands were 
not inhabited was very evident. The only point to ascertain 
vvas, if there was good anchorage. The coxswain offered to go 
in the boat and examine ; and, with four men, he set off, and 
in about an hour returned, stating that there was plenty of 
water, and that it was as smooth as a mill-pond, being land- 
locked on every side. As they could not weigh the bower- 
anchor, they bent the kedge, and, running in without accident, 
came to in a small bay, between the islands, in seven fathoms 


124 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


water. The sails were furled, and every thing put in order by 
the seamen, who then took the boat and pulled on shore 
“ They might as well have asked leave,” thought Jack. In an 
hour they returned, and, after a short discussion, came aft to 
our hero, in a body. 

The coxswain was spokesman. He said that they had* had 
hard work, and required now to have some rest, — that there 
were provisions on board for three months, so that there could 
not be any hurry, — and that they had found they could pitch a 
tent very well on shore, and live there for a short time, — and 
that as there was no harm in getting drunk on shore, they 
expected that they might be allowed to take provisions and 
plenty of wine with them ; and that the men had desired him 
to ask leave, because they were determined to go, whether or 
no. Jack was about to answer with the handspike ; but per- 
ceiving that the men had all put on their cutlasses,, and had 
their pistols at their belts, he thought proper to consult Mesty, 
who, perceiving that resistance was useless, advised Jack to 
submit, observing, that the sooner all the wine was gone the 
better, as there would be nothing done while it lasted. Jack, 
therefore, very graciously told them, that they should have 
their own way, and he would stay there as long as they pleased. 
Mesty gave them the keys of the provision-hatch, and told 
them with a grin to help themselves. The men then informed 
J ack that he and Mesty should stay on board, and take care of 
the ship for them, and that they would take the Spaniard on 
shore to cook their victuals ; but to this Jack observed, that if 
he had not two hands, he could not obey their orders, in case 
they wished him to come on shore for them. The men thought 
there was good argument in that observation, and therefore 
allowed Jack to retain the Spaniard, that he might be more 
. prompt to their call from the beach : they then wished him 
good day, and begged that he would amuse himself with the 
“ articles of war.” 

As soon as they had thrown a spare sail into the boat, with 
some spars to make a tent, and some bedding, they went down 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EAST. 


■*125 


below, lioisted up two pipes of wine out of the three, a bag or 
two of biscuit, arms and ammunition, and as much of the salt 
provisions as they thought they might require. The boat being 
full, they shoved off with three cheers of derision; Jack was 
sensible to the compliment : he stood at the gangway, took off 
his hat, and made them a polite bow. 

As soon as they were gone, Mesty grinned with his sharp-filed 
teeth, and looking at our hero, said, — 

“ I tink I make um pay for all dis — stop a little; by de piper 
as played before Moses, but our turn come by-and-bye.” 

As for Jack, he said nothing, but he thought the more. 
In about an hour the men returned in the boat : they had for- 
gotten many things they wanted — wood to make a fire, and 
several utensils ; they helped themselves freely, and having 
now every thing that they could think of, they again went on 
shore. 

“ How d — n lucky, we never tell dem about the dollars,” said 
Mesty, as Jack and he were watching the motions of the 
men. 

“It is, indeed,” replied Jack, “not that they could spend 
them here.” 

“ No, Massa Easy, but suppose they find all that money, they 
take boat and go away with it. Now, I hab them in ray 
clutch-^— stop a little.” 

A narrow piece of salt pork had been left at the gangway : 
Jack, without knowing why, tossed it overboard ; being almost 
all fat, it sank very gradually ; Jack watched it as it disap- 
peared, so did Mesty, both full of thought, when they perceived 
a dark object rising under it : it was a ground shark, who took 
it into his maw, sank down, and disappeared. 

“ What was that ?” said Jack. 

“That ground shark, Massa Easy — worst shark of all ; you 
neber see him till you feel him ;” and Mesty’s eyes sparkled 
with pleasure u By de powers, they soon stop the mutiny 3 
now I hab Vm.” 

Jack shupdered, and walked away. 


126 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY 


During the day, the men on shore were seen to work hard, 
and make all the preparations before they abandoned themselves 
to the sensual gratification of intemperance. The tent was 
pitched, the fire was lighted, and all the articles taken on shore 
rolled up and stowed away in their places ; they were seen 
to sit down and dine, for they were within hail of the ship, and 
then one of the casks of wine was spiled. In the mean time the 
Spaniard, who was a quiet lad, had prepared the dinner for 
Easy and his now only companion. The evening closed, and 
all was noise and revelry on shore ; and as they danced, and 
sung, and tossed off the cans of wine by the light of the fire, 
as they hallooed and screamed, and became more and more 
intoxicated, Mesty turned to Jack with his bitter smile, and 
only said — 

“ Stop a little.” 

At last the noise grew fainter, the fire died away, and gradu- 
ally all was silent. J ack was still hanging over the gangway, 
when Mesty came up to him. The new moon had just risen, 
and J ack’s eyes were fixed upon it. 

“Now, Massa Easy, please you come aft and lower down 
little boat ; take your pistols and then we go on shore and 
bring off the cutter ; they all asleep now.” 

“ But why should we leave them without a boat, Mesty ?” for 
Jack thought of the sharks, and the probability of the men 
attempting to swim off. 

“I tell you, sar, this night they get drunk, to-morrow 
they get drunk again, but drunken men never keep quiet, — 
suppose one man say to others, ‘Let’s go board and kill 
officer, and then we do as we please,’ they all say yes, and 
they all come and do it. No, sar — must have boat — if not 
for your sake, I must hab it, save my own life any how, for 
they hate me and kill me first ; — by de powers, stop a 
little.” 

Jack felt the truth of Mesty’s observation ; he went aft with 
him, lowered down the small boat, and they hauled it alongside. 
Jack went down with Mesty into the cabin and fetched his 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


121 


pistols. — “ And the Spaniard, Mesty, can we leave him on 
board alone ?•” 

“ Yes, sar, he no got arms, and he see dat we have — but 
suppose he find arms he never dare do any thing — I know de 
man.” 

Our hero and Mesty went down into the boat and shoved off, 
pulling gently on shore ; - the men were in a state of intoxica- 
tion, so as not to be able to move, much less hear. They cast 
off the cutter, towed her on board, and made her fast with the 
other boat astern. 

“ Now, sar, we may go to bed ; to-morrow morning you will 
see.” 

“ They have every thing they require on shore,” replied 
Easy ; “ all they could want with the cutter would be to molest 
us.” 

“ Stop a little,” replied Mesty. 

Jack and Mesty went to bed, and as a precaution against the 
Spaniard, which was hardly necessary, Mesty locked the cabin 
door — but Mesty never forgot any thing. 

Jack slept little that night — had melancholy forebodings 
which he could not shake off ; indeed, Jack had reflected so 
much since he had left the ship, he had had his eyes so much 
opened, and had felt what a responsibility he had taken by 
indulging himself in a whim of the moment, that it might be 
almost said, that in the course of one fortnight he had at once 
from a boy sprung up into a man. He was mortified and angry, 
but he was chiefly so with himself. 

Mesty was up at daylight and Jack soon followed him : they 
watched the party on shore, who had not yet left the lent. 
At last, just as Jack had finished his breakfast, one or two 
made their appearance : the men looked about them as if they 
were searching for something, and then walked down to the 
beach, to where the boat had been made fast. Jack looked at 
Mesty, who grinned, and answered with the words so often 
repeated, — 

“ Stop a little.” 


128 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


The men then walked along the rocks until they were abreast 
of the ship. 

“ Ship ahoy !” 

“ Halloo,” replied Mesty. 

“ Bring the boat ashore directly, with a beaker of water.” 

“ I knew dat,” cried Mesty, rubbing his hands with delight. 
“ Massa Easy, you must tell them No.” 

“ But why should I not give them water, Mesty ?” 

“ Because, sar, den they take boat.” 

“ Very true,” replied Easy. 

“ Do you hear on board ?” cried the coxswain, who was the 
man who hailed — “ send the boat immediately, or we’ll cut the 
throats of every mother’s son of you, by God !” 

“ I shall not send the boat,” replied Jack, who now thought 
Mesty was right. 

“You won’t — won’t you ?— then your doom’s sealed,” replied 
the man, walking up to the tent with the other. In- a short 
time all the seamen turned out of the tent, bringing with them 
four muskets, which they had taken on shore with them. 

“ Good heavens ! they are not, surely, going to fire at us, 
Mesty.” 

“ Stop a little.” 

The men then came down abreast of the ship, and the 
coxswain again hailed, and asked if they would bring the boat 
on shore. 

“You must say, No, sar,” replied Mesty. 

“ I feel I must,” replied Jack, and then he answered the cox- 
swain, “ No.” 

The plan of the mutineers had been foreseen by the wily 
negro — it was to swim off to the boats which were riding 
astern, and to fire at him or Jack, if they attempted to haul 
them up alongside and defend them. To get into the boats, espe- 
cially the smaller one, from out of the water, was easy enough. 
Some of the men examined their priming and held the muskets 
at their hips all ready, with the muzzles towards the ship, 
while the coxswain and two men were throwing off their clothes. 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


122 


“ Stop, for God’s sake, stop !” cried Jack. “ The harbour 
is full of ground sharks, — it is, upon my soul I” 

“ Do you think to frighten us with ground sharks r” replied 
the coxswain, “ keep under cover, my lad ; Jack, give him a 
shot to prove we are in earnest, and every time he or that nig- 
ger show their heads, give them another, my lads.” 

“ For God’s sake, don’t attempt to swim,” said Jack, in an 
agony ; “I will try some means to give you water.” 

“Too late now — you’re doomed j” and the coxswain sprang 
off the rock into the sea, and was followed by two other men : 
at the same moment a musket was discharged, and the bullet 
whistled close to our hero’s e'ar. 

Mesty dragged Jack from the gangway, who was now nearly 
fainting from agonising feelings. He sank on the deck for a 
moment, and then sprang up and ran to the port to look at the 
men in the water. He was just in time to see the coxswain 
raise himself with a loud yell out of the sea, and then disappear 
in a vortex, which was crimsoned with his blood. 

Mesty threw down the musket in his hand, of which he had 
several all ready loaded, in case the men should have gained 
the boats. 

“ By the powers, dat no use now !” 

Jack had covered his face with his hands. But the tragedy 
was not complete : the other men, who were in the water, had 
immediately turned and made for the shore ; but before they 
could reach it, two more of these voracious monsters, attracted 
by the blood of the coxswain, had flown to the spot, and there 
was a contention for the fragments of their bodies. 

Mesty, who had seen this catastrophe, turned towards our 
hero, who still hid his face. 

“ I’m glad he no see dat, -any how,” muttered Mesty. 

“ See what ?” exclaimed Jack. 

“ Shark eat em all.” 

“ Oh, horrid ! horrid,” groaned our hero. 

“ Yes, sar, very horrid,” replied Mesty, “ and dat bullet at 
your head very horrid. Suppose the sharks no take them, what 

6* 


130 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


then ? They kill ns and the sharks have our body. I think 
that more horrid still.” 

“ Mesty,” replied Jack, seizing the negro convulsively by the 
arm, “ it was not the sharks — it was I, — I who have murdered 
these men.” 

Mesty looked at J ack with surprise. 

“ How dat possible ?” 

“ If I had not disobeyed orders,” replied our hero, panting 
for breath, “ if I had not shown them the example of disobe- 
dience, this would not have happened. How could I expect 
submission from them ? It’s all my fault — I see it now — and, 
0 God ! when will the sight be blotted from my memory ?” 

“ Massa Easy, I not understand that,” replied Mesty : “I 
think you talk foolish — might as well say, suppose Ashantee 
men not make war, this not happen ; for suppose Ashantee not 
make war, I not slave, — I not run away, — I not come board 
Harpy— I not go in boat with you — I not hinder men from 
getting drunk — and dat why they make mutiny — and the 
mutiny why the shark take um ?” 

Jack made no reply, but he felt some consolation from the 
counter-argument of the negro. 

The dreadful death of the three mutineers appeared to have 
had a sensible effect upon their companions, who walked away 
from the beach with their heads down and with measured steps. 
They were now seen to be perambulating the island, probably 
in search of that water which they required. At noon, they 
returned to their tent, and soon afterwards were in a state of 
intoxication, hallooing and shouting as the day before. Towards 
the evening they came down to the beach abreast of the ship, 
each with a vessel in their hands, and perceiving that they had 
attracted the notice of our hero and Mesty, tossed the contents 
of the vessels up in the air to show that they had found water, 
and hooting and deriding, went back, dancing, leaping, and 
kicking up their heels, to renew their orgies, which continued 
till after midnight, when they were all stupified as before. 

The next day Jack had recovered from the first shock which 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EaSY. 


iai 


the catastrophe had given him, and he called Mesty into the 
cabin to hold a consultation. 

“ Mesty, how is this to end ?” 

“ How you mean, sar ? — end here, or end on board of the 
Harpy ?” 

“ The Harpy, — there appears little chance of our seeing her 
again — we are on a desolate island, or what is the same thing ; 
but we will hope that it will be so : but how is this mutiny 
to end ?” 

“ Massa Easy, suppose I please, I make it end very soon, 
but I not in a hurry.” 

“ How do you mean, Mesty, not in a hurry ?” 

“ Look, Massa Easy, you wish take a cruise, and I wish the 
same ting : now because mutiny you want to go back — but, by 
all the powers, you tink that I, a prince in my own country, 
feel wish to go back and boil kettle for. de young gentlemen. 
No, Massa Easy, gib me mutiny — gib me any ting — but — once 
I wa3 prince,” replied Mesty, lowering his voice at the last few 
emphatic words. 

“ You must one of these days tell me your history, Mesty,” 
replied Jack ; “ but just now let us argue the point in ques- 
tion. How could you put an end to this mutiny ?” 

“ By putting an end to all wine. Suppose I go shore after 
they all drunk, I spile the casks in three or four places, and in 
the morning all wine gone — den dey ab get sober, and beg par- 
don — we take dem on board, put away all arms ’cept yours and 
mine, and I like to see the mutiny after dat. Blood and ’ounds 
— but I settle um, any how.” 

“ The idea is very good, Mesty, — why should we not do so ?” 

“ Because I not like run de risk to go ashore — all for what ? 
to go back, boil de kettle for all gentlemans — I very happy 
here, Massa,” replied Mesty, carelessly. 

“ And I am very miserable,” replied Jack ; “ but however, 

I am completely in your power, Mesty, and I must, I suppose, 
submit.” 

“ What you say, Massa Easy — submit to me ? — no sar, when 


132 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


you are on board Harpy as officer, you talk with me as friend 
and not treat me as negro servant. Massa Easy, I feel — I feel 
what I am,” continued Mesty, striking his bosom, “ I feel it 
here — for all first time since I leave my country, I feel that I 
am something ; but, Massa Easy, I love my friend as much as 
I hate my enemy — and you neber submit to me — I too proud 
to allow dat, ’cause, Massa Easy — I am a man — and once, I was 
a prince.” 

Although Mesty did not perhaps explain by words half so 
well as he did by his countenance, the full tide of feeling which 
was overflowing in his heart, Jack fully understood and felt it 
He extended his hand to Mesty, and said : — 

“ Mesty, — that you have been a prince, I care little about, 
although I doubt it not, because you are incapable of a lie ; but 
you are a man, and I respect you, nay, I love you as a friend— 
and with my will we never part again.” 

Mesty took the hand offered by Jack. It was the first peace- 
offering ever extended to him, since he had been torn away 
from his native land — the first compliment, the first tribute, the 
first acknowledgment, perhaps, that he was not an inferior 
being ; he pressed it in silence, for he could not speak ; but 
could the feelings which were suffocating the negro but have 
been laid before sceptics, they must have acknowledged that at 
that moment they were all and only such as could do honour, 
not only to the prince, but even to the Christian. So much 
was Mesty affected with what had happened, that when he 
dropped the hand of our hero, he went down into the cabin, 
finding it impossible to continue the conversation, which was 
not renewed until the next morning. 

“What is your opinion, Mesty? — tell me, and I will be gov- 
erned by it.” 

“ Den, sar, I tell you I tink it right that they first come and 
ask to come on board before you take them — and, sar, I tink it 
also right, as we are but two and they are five, dat dey first eat 
all their provision — let em starve plenty, and den dey come oij 
board tame enough.” 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


133 


“ a U events,” replied Jack, “ the first overtures of some 
kind or another must come from them. I wish I had some- 
thing to do — I do not much like this cooping up on board 
ship.” 

“ Massa, why you no talk with Pedro ?” 

“ Because I cannot speak Spanish.” 

“I know dat, and dat why I ask de question. You very 
sorry when you meet, the two pretty women in the ship, you not 
able to talk with them — I guess that.” 

“ I was very sorry, I grant,” replied Jack. 

“Well, Massa Easy, by-and-bye we see more Spanish girl. 
Why not talk all day with • Pedro, and den you able to talk 
with dem.” 

“ Upon my word, Mesty, I never had an idea of your value. 
I will learn all the Spanish that I can,” replied Jack, who was 
glad to have employment found for him, and was quite disgusted 
with the articles of war. 

As for the men on shore, they continued the same course, if 
not as before, one day succeeded another, and without variety. 
It was, however, to be observed, that the fire was now seldomer 
lighted, which proved their fuel scarce, and the weather was 
not so warm as it had been, for it was now October. Jack 
learnt Spanish from Pedro for a month, during which there was 
no appearance of submission on the part of the mutineers, who, 
for the first fortnight, when intoxicated, used to come down and 
fire at J ack or Mesty, when they made their appearance. For- 
tunately drunken men are not good marksmen, but latterly this 
had been discontinued, because they had expended their ammu- 
nition — and they appeared to have almost forgotten that the 
ship was there, for they took no notice of her whatever. 

On the other hand, Jack had decided that if he waited there 
a year, the overtures should come from them who had mutinied ; 
and now, having an occupation, he passed his time very quietly, 
and the days flew so fast that two months had actually been 
run off the calendar, before he had an idea of it. 

One evening, as they were down in the cabin, for the even 


134 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


ings had now become very cold, J ack asked Mesty whether he 
had any objeetjon to give him a history of his life. Mesty 
replied, that if he wished he was ready to talk ; and at a nod 
from our hero, Mesty commenced as follows : 


CHAPTER XYI. 

IN WHICH MUTINY, LIKE FIRE, IS QUENCHED FOR WANT OF FUEL, 
AND NO WANT OF WATER. 

Although we have made the African negro hitherto talk in his 
own mixed jargon, yet, as we consider that, in a long narration, 
it will be tedious to the reader, we shall now translate the nar- 
rative part into good English, merely leaving the conversation 
with which it may be broken, in its peculiar dialect. 

“The first thing I recollect,” said Mesty, “is that I was car- 
ried on the shoulders of a man with my legs hanging down 
before, and holding on by his head. 

“ Every one used to look at me, and get out of the way, as I 
rode through the town and market-place, so loaded with heavy 
gold ornaments that I could not bear them, and was glad when 
the women took them off : but, as I grew older I became proud 
of them, because I knew that I was the son of a king — I lived 
happy, I did nothing but shoot my arrows, and I had a little 
sword which I was taught to handle, and the great captains 
who were about my father showed me how to kill my enemies. 
Sometimes I laid under the shady trees, sometimes I was with 
the women belonging to my father, sometimes I was with him 
and played with the skulls, and repeated the names of those to 
whom they had belonged, for in our country, when we kill our 
enemies, we keep their skulls as trophies. 

“As I grew older, I did as I pleased ; I beat the women 
and the slaves ; I think I killed some of the latter — I know I 
did one, to try whether I could strike well with my two-handed 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


135 


sword made of hard an 



wood — but that is nothing it 


our country. I longed to be a great captain, and I thought of 
nothing else but war and fighting, and how many skulls I 
should have in my possession when I had a house and wives of 
my own, and I was no longer a boy. I went out in the woods 
to hunt, and I staid for weeks. And one day I saw a panther 
basking in the sun, waving his graceful tail. I crept up softly 
till I was behind a rock within three yards of it, and drawing 
my arrow to the head I pierced him through the body. The 
animal bounded up in the air, saw me, roared and made a 
spring, but I dropped behind the rock, and he passed over me. 
He turned again to me, but I had my knife ready, and, as he 
fixed his talons into my shoulder and breast I pierced him to 
the heart. This was the happiest day of my life ; I had killed 
a panther without any assistance, and I had the wounds to 
show. Although I was severely hurt, I thought nothing of it. 
I took off the skin as my blood dropped down and mixed with 
that of the beast — but I rejoiced in it. Proudly did I go into 
the town dripping with gore and smarting with pain. Every 
one extolled the feat, called me a hero and a great captain. I 
filed my teeth, and I became a man. 

“ From that day I ranked among the warriors, and, as soon 
as my wounds were healed, I went out to battle. In three 
fights I had gained five skulls, and when I returned they 
weighed me out gold. I then had a house and wives, and my 
father appointed me a Caboceer. I wore the plume of eagle 
and ostrich feathers, my dress was covered with fetishes, I 
pulled on the boots with bells, and with my bow and arrows 
slung on my back, my spear and blunderbuss, my knives and my 
double-handed sword, I led the men to battle and brought back 
skulls and slaves. Every one trembled at my name, and, if my 
father threatened to send me out, gold-dust covered the floor of 
his hall of council. Now, I boil the kettle for the young gem 
tlemen ! 

“ There was one man I liked. He was not a warrior, or I 
should have hated him, but he was brought up with me in my 


136 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


father’s house, and was a near relative. I was grave and full 
of pride, he was gay and fond of music ; and although there 
was no music to me equal to the tom-tom, yet I did not always 
wish for excitement. I often was melancholy, and then I liked 
to lay my head in the lap of one of my wives, under the shady 
forest behind my house, and listen to his soft music. At last 
he went to a town near us where his father lived, and as he 
departed I gave him gold-dust. He had been sent to my father 
to be formed into a warrior, but he had no strength of body, 
and he had no soul ; still I loved him, because he was not like 
myself. There was a girl in the town who was beautiful ; 
many asked for her as their wife, but her father had long 
promised her to my friend ; he refused even the greatest war- 
rior of the place, who went away in wrath to the fetishman, 
and throwing him his gold armlets, asked for a fetish against 
his rival. It was given, and two days before he was to be mar- 
ried my friend died. His mother came to me, and it was 
enough. I put on my war dress, I seized my weapons, sat for 
a whole day with my skulls before me, working up my revenge, 
called out my men, and that night set off for the town where 
the warrior resided, killed two of his relatives and carried off 
ten of his slaves. When he heard what I had done, he trem- 
bled and sent gold ; but I knew that he had taken the girl 
home as his wife, and I would not listen to the old man who 
sought to pacify me. Again I collected a larger force, and 
attacked him in the night : we fought, for he was prepared with 
his men, but after a struggle he was beaten back. I fired his 
house, wasted his provision ground, and taking away more 
slaves, I returned home with my men, intending soon to assault 
him again. The next day there came more messengers, who 
knelt in vain ; so they went to my father, and many warriors 
begged him to interfere. My father sent for me, but I would 
not listen ; the warriors spoke, and I turned my back : my 
father was wroth and threatened, the warriors branc. ‘shed their 
two-handed swords — they dared to do it ; I looked over my 
shoulder with contempt, and I returned to my house. I took 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


131 


down my skulls, and I planned. It was evening, and I was 
alone, when a woman covered up to the eyes approached ; she 
fell down before me as she exposed her face. 

“ 1 1 am the girl who was promised to your relation, and I am 
now the wife of your enemy. I shall be a mother. I could not 
love your relation, for he was no warrior. It is not true that 
my husband asked for a fetish — it was I who bought it, for I 
would not wed him. Kill me and be satisfied. 7 

“ She was very beautiful, and I wondered not that my enemy 
loved her — and she was with child — it was his child, and she 
had fetished my friend to death. I raised my sword to strike, 
and she did not shrink : it saved her life. Thou art fit to be the 
mother of warriors, said I, as I dropped my sword, and thou 
shalt be my wife, but first his child shall be born, and I will 
have thy husband’s skull.” 

“ ‘ No, no/ replied she, ‘I shall be the mother of no warriors 
but my present husband, whom I love ; if you keep me as your 
slave I will die. 7 

“ I told her she, said foolish things, and sent her to the 
women’s apartment, with orders to be watched — but she hardly 
had been locked up before she drew her knife, plunged it into 
her heart, and died. 

“ When the king my father heard this he sent me a message 
. — ‘ Be satisfied with the blood that has been shed, it is enough, 
— but I turned #way, for I wished for my enemy’s skull. That 
night I attacked him again, and met him hand to hand ; I 
killed him, and carried home his skull, and I was appeased. 

“ But all the great warriors were wroth, and my father could 
not restrain them. They called out their men, and I called 
out my men, and I had a large body, for my name was ter- 
rible. But the force raised against me was twice that of mine, 
and I retreated to the bush — after awhile we met and fought, 
and I killed many, but my men were too few and were over- 
powered — the fetish had been sent out against me, and their 
hearts melted ; at last I sank down with my wounds, for I bled 
at every pore, and I told my men who were about me to take 


138 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


off my feathers, and my dress and boots, that my enemies might 
not have my skull : they did so, and I crawled into the bush to 
die. But I was not to die ; I was recovering when I was dis- 
covered by those who steal men to sell them : I was bound, 
and fastened to a chain with many more. I, a prince and a 
warrior, who could show the white skulls of his enemies — I 
offered to procure gold, but they derided me ; they dragged me 
down to the coast, and sold me to the Whites. Little did I 
think, in my pride, that I should be a slave. I knew that I 
was to die, and hoped to die in battle ; my skull would have 
been more prized than all the gold in th« earth, and my skin 
would have been stuffed and hung up in a fetish-house — instead 
of which I now boil the kettle for the young gentlemen.” 

“ Well,” replied Jack, “that’s better than being killed and 
stuffed.” 

“ Mayhap it is,” replied Mesty, “ I tink very different now 
dan I tink den — but still, it women’s work and not suit me. 

“ They put me with others into a cave until the ship came, 
and then we were sent on board, put in irons, and down in the 
hold where you could not sit upright — I wanted to die, but 
could not ; others died every day, but I lived — I was landed in 
America, all bone, and I fetched very little money — they 
laughed at me, as they bid their dollars : at last a man took 
me away, and I was on a plantation with hundreds more, but 
too ill to work, and not intending to work. %he other slaves 
asked me if I was a fetish-man ;• I said yes, and I would fetish 
any man that I did not like : one man laughed, and I held up 
my finger ; I was too weak to get up, for my blood had long 
boiled with fever, and I said to him, 1 you shall die ;’ for I meant 
to have killed him, as soon as I was well. He went away, and 
in three days he was dead. I don’t know how, but all the 
slaves feared me, and my master feared me, for he had seen the 
man die, and he, although he was a white man, believed in 
fetish, and he wished to sell me again, but no one would buy a 
fetish-man, so he made friends with me ; for I told him if I was 
beat he should die, and he believed me. He took me into his 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


133 

house, and I was his chief man, and I would not let the other 
slaves steal, and he was content. He took me with him to 
' New York, and there after two years, when I had learnt Eng- 
lish, I ran away, and got on board of an English ship — and 
they told me to cook. I left the ship as soon as I came to 
England, and offered mysSlf to another, and they said they did 
not want a cook ; and I went to another, and they asked me 
if I was a good cook : everybody seemed to think that a black 
man must be a cook, and nothing else. At last I starve, and 
I go on board man-of-war, and here I am, after having been a 
warrior and a prince,* cook, steward and every ting else, boiling 
kettle for de young gentlemen.” 

“Well,” replied Jack, “at all events that is better than 
being a slave.” 

Mesty made no reply ; any one who knows the life of a mid- 
shipman’s servant will not be surprised at his silence. 

“Now, tell me, do you think you were right in being so 
revengeful, when you were in your own country ?” inquired 
Jack. 

“ I tink so den, Massa Easy ; sometimes when my blood boil 
I tink so now — oder time, I no know what to tink — but when a 
man love very much, he hate very much.” 

“ But you are now a Christian, Mesty.” 

“ I hear all that your people say,” replied the negro, “ and it 
make me tink — I no longer believe in fetish, any how.” 

« Our religion tells us to love our enemies.” 

“ Yes, I heard parson say dat — but den what we do with 
our friends, Massa Easy ?” 

“ Love them too.” 

“ I no understand dat, Massa Easy — I love you, because you 
good, and treat me well — Mr. Vigors, he bully, and treat me 
ill — bow possible to love him ? By de power, I hate him, and 
wish I had him skull. You tink little Massa Gossett love him ?” 

“No,” replied Jack laughing, “I’m afraid that he would 
like to have his skull as well as you, Mesty— but at all events 
we must try and forgive those who injure us.” 


140 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


“ Then Massa Easy, I tink so too— too much revenge very 
bad — it very easy to hate, but not very easy to forgive — so I 
tink that if a man forgive, he hab morz soul in him, he more of 
a man .” 

“ After all,” thought Jack, “ Mesty is about as good a Chris- 
tian as most people.” 

“ What that ?” cried Mesty, looking out of the cabin window 
— “ Ah ! d — n drunken dogs — they set fire to tent.” 

Jack looked, and perceived that the tent on shore was in flames. 

“I tink these cold nights cool them courage any how,” ob- 
served Mesty— “ Massa Easy, you see they soon ask permission 
to come on board.” 

Jack thought so too, and was most anxious to be off, for, on 
looking into the lockers in the state-room, he had found a chart 
of the Mediterranean, which he had studied very attentively — 
he had found out the rock of Gibraltar, and had traced the 
Harpy’s course up to the Cape de Gatte, and thence to Tarra- 
gona — and, after a while, had summoned Mesty to a cabinet 
council. 

“ See Mesty,” said Jack, “ I begin to make it out ; here is 
Gibraltar, and Cape de Gatte, and Tarragona — it was here- 
about we were when we took the ship, and, if you recollect, we 
passed Cape de Gatte two days before we were blown off from 
the land, so that we had gone about twelve inches, and had only 
four more to go.” 

“Yes, Massa Easy, I see all dat.” 

“ Well, then, we were blown off shore by the wind, and must 
of course have come down this way ; and here you see are three 
little islands, called ^affarine Islands, and with no names of 
towns upon them, and therefore uninhabited ; and you see they 
lie just like the islands we are anchored among now — we must 
be at the Zaffarine Islands — and only six inches from Gibral- 
tar.” 

“ I see, Massa Easy, dat all right — but six debblish long 
inches.” 

“ How, Mesty, you know the compass on deck has a flourish* 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


141 


mg thing for t)ie north point — and here is a compass "with a 
north point also. Now the north point from the Zaffarine 
Islands leads out to the Spanish coast again, and Gibraltar lies 
five or six points of the compass to this side of it — if we steer 
that way we shall get to Gibraltar.” 

“ All right, Massa Easy,” replied Mesty ; and Jack was 
right, with the exception of the variation, which he knew no- 
thing about. 

To make sure, Jack brought one of the compasses down from 
deck, and compared them. He then lifted off the glass, counted 
the points of the compass to the westward, and marked the cor- 
responding one on the binnacle compass with his pen. 

“ There,” said he, “ that is the way to Gibraltar, and as 
soon as the mutiny is quelled, and the wind is fair, I’ll be off.” 


CHAPTER XYI. 

IN WHICH JACK’S CRUISE IS ENDED, AND HE REGAINS THE 
HARPY. 

A few more days passed, and, as was expected, the mutineers 
could hold out no longer. In the first place, they had put 
in the spile of the second cask of wine so loosely when they 
were tipsy, that it dropped out, and all the wine ran out, so 
that there had been none left for three or four days ; in the 
next, their fuel had long been expended, and they had latterly 
eaten their meat raw : the loss of their tent, which had been 
fired by their carelessness, had been followed by four days and 
nights of continual rain. Every thing they had had been 
soaked through and through, and they were worn out, shiver- 
ing with cold, and starving. Hanging they thought better 
than dying by inches from starvation ; and yielding to the im- 
perious demands of hunger, they came down to the beach, 
abreast of the ship, and dropped down on their knees. 


142 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


“ I tell you so, Massa Easy,” said Mesty : “ d — n rascals, 
they forget they come down fire musket at us every day : by 
all de powers, Mesty not forget it.” 

11 Ship ahoy,” cried one of the men on shor§. 

“ What do you want ?” replied Jack. 

“ Have pity on us, sir — mercy !” exclaimed the other men, 
“ we will return to our duty.” 

“ Debbel doubt em !” 

“ What shall I say, Mesty ?” 

“ Tell em no, first, Massa Easy — tell em to starve and be 
d— d.” 

“ I cannot take mutineers on board,” replied Jack. 

“Well, then, our blood be on your hands, Mr. Easy,” re- 
plied the first man who had spoken. “ If we are to die, it must 
not be by inches — if you will not take us, the sharks shall — it 
is but a crunch, and all is over. What do you say, my lads? 
let’s all rush in together : good-bye, Mr. Easy, I hope you’ll 
forgive us when we’re dead : it was all that rascal, Johnston, 
the coxswain, who persuaded us. Come, my lads, it’s no use 
thinking of it, the sooner done the better — let us shake hands, 
and then make one run of it.” 

It appeared that the poor fellows had already made up their 
minds to do this, if our hero, persuaded by Mesty, had refused 
to take them on board — they shook hands all round, and then 
walking a few yards from the beach, stood in a line, while the 
man gave the signal — one — two. 

“ Stop,” cried Jack, who had not forgotten the dreadful scene 
which had already taken place, — “ stop.” 

The men paused. 

“ What will you promise if I take you on board ?” 

“ To do our duty cheerfully till we join the ship, and then be 
hung as an example to all mutineers,” replied the men. 

“ Dat very fair,” replied Mesty ; “ take dem at their word, 
Massa Easy.” 

“Very well,” replied Jack, “ I accept your conditions ; and 
we will come for you.” 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


143 


Jack and Mesty hauled up the boat, stuck their pistols in 
their belts, and pulled to the shore. The men, as they stepped 
in, touched their hats respectfully to our hero, but said nothing. 
On their arrival on board, Jack read that part of the articles 
of war relative to mutiny, by which the men were reminded of 
the very satisfactory fact, “ that they were to suffer death 
and then i$ade a speech which, to men who were starving, ap- 
peared to be interminable. However, there is an end to every 
thing in this world, and so there was to Jack’s harangue ; after 
which Mesty gave them some biscuit, which they devoured in 
thankfulness, until they could get something better. The next 
morning the wind was fair, they weighed their kedge with some 
difficulty, and ran out of the harbour : the men appeared very 
contrite, worked well, but in silence, for they had no very pleas- 
ant anticipations ; but hope always remains with us ; and each of 
the men, although he had no doubt but that the others would be 
hung, hoped that he would escape with a sound flogging. The 
wind, however, did not allow them to steer their course long ; 
before night it was contrary, and they fell off three points 
to the northward. “ However,” as Jack observed, “ at all 
events we shall make the Spanish coast, and then we must run 
down it to Gibraltar : I don’t care — I understand navigation 
much better than I did.” The next morning they found them- 
selves, with a light breeze, under a high cape, and, as the sun 
- rose, they observed a large vessel in shore, about two miles to 
the westward of them, and another outside, about four miles 
off. Mesty took the glass, and examined the one outside, 
which, on a sudden, had let fall all her canvass, and was now 
running for the shore, steering for the cape under which Jack’s 
vessel lay. Mesty put down the glass. 

Massa Easy — I tink dat de Harpy.” 

One of the seamen took the glass and examined her, while 
the others who stood by showed great agitation. 

“ Yes, it is the Harpy,” said the seaman. “ Oh! Mr. Easy, 
will you forgive us ?” continued the man, and he and the others 
fell on their knees. “ Do not tell all, for God’s sake, Mr. Easy.’’ 


144 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY 


Jack’s heart melted ; he looked at Mesty. 

“ I tink,” said Mesty, apart to our hero, “ dat with what them 
hab suffer already, suppose they get seven dozen a-piece, dat quite 
enough.” 

Jack thought that even half that punishment would suffice ; 
so he told the men, that although he must state what had occur- 
red, he would not tell all, and would contrive to get them off 
as well as he could. He was about to make a long speech, but 
a gun from the Harpy, which had now come up within range, 
made him defer it till a more convenient opportunity. At the 
same time, the vessel in shore hoisted Spanish colours, and fired 
a gun. 

“ By de powers but we got in de middle of it,” cried Mesty; 
“ Harpy tink us Spaniard. How, my lads, get all gun ready, 
bring up powder and shot. Massa, now us fire at Spaniard — 
Harpy not fire at us — no ab English colours on board — dat all 
we must do.” 

The men set to with a will ; the guns were all loaded, and 
were soon cast loose and primed, during which operations it fell 
calm, and the sails of all three vessels flapped against their 
masts. The Harpy was then about two miles from Jack’s ves- 
sel, and the Spaniard about a mile from him, with all her boats 
ahead of her, towing towards him ; Mesty examined the Span- 
ish vessel. 

“ Dat man-o-war, Massa Easy, — what de debbel we do for 
colour ? must hoist something.” 

Mesty ran down below ; he recollected that there was a very 
gay petticoat, which had been left by the old lady who was in 
the vessel when they captured her. It w^as of green silk, with 
yellow and blue flowers, but very faded, having probably been 
in the Don’s family for a century. Mesty had found it under 
the mattrass of one of the beds, and had put it into his bag, in- 
tending probably to cut it up into waistcoats. He soon appeared 
with this under his arm, made it fast to the peak halyards and 
hoisted it up. 

“ Dere, massa, dat do very well — dat what you call all nation 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


145 


colour . Every body strike him flag to dat— men nebber pull it 
down,” said Mesty, “ any how. Now den, ab hoist colour, we 
fire away — mind you only fire one gun at a time, and point um 
well, den ab time to load again.” 

“ She’s hoisted her colours, sir,” said Sawbridge, on board of 
the Harpy ; “ but they do not show out clear, and it’s impos- 
sible to distinguish them ; but there’s a gun.” 

“ It’s not at us, sir,” said Gascoigne, the midshipman ; “ it’s 
at the Spanish vessel — I saw the shot fall ahead of her.” 

“ It must be a privateer,” said Captain Wilson, “ at all events, 
it is very fortunate, for the corvette would otherwise have towed 
into Carthagena. Another gun, round and grape, and well 
pointed too ; she carries heavy metal, that craft : she must be 
a Maltese privateer.” 

“ That’s as much as to say that she’s a pirate,” replied Saw- 
bridge ; “I can make nothing of her colours — they appear to 
me to be green — she must be a Turk. Another gun — and devil- 
ish well aimed ; it has hit the boats.” 

“Yes, they are all in confusion : we will have her now, if 
we can only get a trifle of wind. That is a breeze coming up 
zn the offing. Trim the sails, Mr. Sawbridge.” 

The yards were squared, and the Harpy soon had steerage- 
way. In the meantime Jack and his few men had kept up a 
steady, well-directed, although slow, fire with their larboard 
guns upon the Spanish corvette ; and two of her boats had been 
disabled. The Harpy brought the breeze up with her, and was 
soon within range ; she steered to cut off the corvette, firing 
only her bow-chasers. 

“We ab her now,” cried Mesty, “fire away, — men take 
good aim. Breeze come now ; one man go to helm. By de 
power what dat ?” 

The exclamation of Mesty was occasioned by a shot hulling 
the ship on the starboard side. Jack and he ran over, and per- 
ceived that three Spanish gun-boats had just made their appear- 
ance round the point, and had attacked them. The fact was, 
that on the other side of the cape was the port and town of 

7 


146 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


Carthagena, and these gun-boats had been sent out to the as- 
sistance of the corvette. The ship had now caught the breeze, 
fortunately for Jack, or he would probably have been taken into 
Carthagena ; and the corvette, finding herself cut off by both 
the Harpy and Jack’s vessel, as soon as the breeze came up to 
her, put her head the other way, and tried to escape by running 
westward along the coast close in-shore. Another shot, and 
then another, pierced the hull of the ship, and wounded two of 
J ack’s men ; but as the corvette had turned, and the Harpy 
followed her, of course Jack did the same, and in ten minutes 
he was clear of the gun-boats, who did not venture to make sail 
and stand after him. The wind now freshened fast, and blew 
out the green petticoat, but the Harpy was exchanging broad- 
sides with the corvette, and too busy to look after Jack’s en- 
sign. The Spaniard defended himself well, and had the assist- 
ance of the batteries as he passed, but there was no anchorage 
until he had run many miles farther. About noon, the wind 
died away, and at one o’clock it again fell nearly calm ; but the 
Harpy had neared her distance, and was now within three 
cables’ length of her antagonist, engaging her and a battery of 
four guns. Jack came up again, for he had the last of the 
breeze, and was about half a mile from the corvette when it fell 
calm. By the advice of Mesty, he did not fire any more, as 
otherwise the Harpy would not obtain so much credit, and it 
was evident that the fire of the Spaniard slackened fast. At 
three o’clock the Spanish colours were hauled down, and the 
Harpy, sending a boat on board and taking possession, directed 
her whole fire upon the battery, which was soon silenced. 

The calm continued, and the Harpy was busy enough with 
the prize, shifting the prisoners and refitting both vessels, which 
had very much suffered in the sails and rigging. There was an 
occasional wonder on board the Harpy what that strange ves- 
sel might be, who had turned the corvette and enabled them t<? 
capture her, but when people are all very busy, there is not much 
time for surmise. 

Jack’s crew, with himself, consisted but of eight, one of whom 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


147 


was a Spaniard, and two were wounded. It therefore left him 
but four, and he had also something to do, which was to assist 
his wounded men, and secure his guns. Moreover, Mesty did 
did not think it prudent to leave the vessel a mile from the 
Harpy with only two on board ; besides, as Jack said, he had 
had no dinner, and was not quite sure that he should find any 
thing to eat when he went into the midshipman’s berth ; he 
would therefore have some dinner cooked, and eat it before he 
went on board ; in the mean time, they would try and close 
with her. Jack took things always very easy, and he said he 
should report himself at sunset. There were other reasons which 
made Jack in no very great hurry to go on board ; he wanted- 
to have time to consider a little, what he should say to excuse 
himself, and also how he should plead for the men. His natural 
correctness of feeling decided him, in the first place, to tell the 
whole truth, and in the next, his kind feelings determined him 
to tell only part of it. Jack need not have given himself the 
trouble, for, as far as regarded himself, he had fourteen thou- 
sand good excuses in the bags which lay in the state-room ; and 
as for the men, after an action with the enemy, if they behave 
well, even mutiny is forgiven. At last, Jack, who was tired 
with excitement and the hard work of the day, thought and 
thought until he fell fast asleep, and instead of waking at sun- 
set, did not wake till two hours afterwards ; and Mesty did not 
call him, because he was in no hurry himself to go on board and 
boil de kettle for de young gentlemen. 

When Jack woke up, he was astonished to find that he had 
slept so long : he went on deck ; it was dark and still calm, but 
he could easily perceive that the Harpy and corvette were still 
hove-to, repairing damages. He ordered the men to lower 
down the small boat, and leaving Mesty in charge, w r ith two 
oars he pulled to the Harpy. What with wounded men, with 
prisoners, and boats going and coming between the vessels, 
every one on board the Harpy was well employed ; and in the 
dark, Jack’s little boat came alongside without notice. This 
should not have been the case, but it was, and there was some 


148 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


excuse for it. Jack ascended the side, and pushed his way 
through the prisoners, who were being mustered to be victualled. 
He was wrapped up in one of the gregos, and many, of the 
prisoners wore the same. 

* Jack was amused at not being recognised : he slipped down 
the main ladder, and had to stoop under the hammocks of the 
wounded men, and was about to go aft to the captain’s cabin 
to report himself, when he heard young Gossett crying out, and 
the sound of the rope. “ Hang me, if that brute Vigors an’t 
thrashing young Gossett,” thought Jack. “ I dare say the poor 
fellow has had plenty of it since I have been away ; I’ll save 
him this time at least.” J ack, wrapped up in his grego, went 
to the window of the berth, looked in, and found it was as he 
expected. He cried out, in an angry voice, “ Mr. Vigors, I’ll 
thank you to leave Gossett alone” At the sound of the voice, 
Vigors turned round with his colt in his hand, saw Jack’s face 
at the window, and, impressed with the idea that the re-appear- 
ance was supernatural, uttered a yell and fell down in a fit — 
little Gossett also, trembling in every limb, stared with his 
mouth open. Jack was satisfied, and immediately disappeared. 
He then went aft, to the cabin, pushed by the servant, who was 
giving some orders from the captain to the officer on deck, and 
entering the cabin, where the captain was seated with two 
Spanish officers, took off his hat and said, — 

“ Come on board, Captain Wilson.” 

Captain Wilson did not fall down in a fit, but he jumped up, 
and upset the glass before him. 

“ Merciful God, Mr. Easy, where did you come from ?” 

“ From that ship astern, sir,” replied Jack. 

“ That ship astern 1 what is she ? — where have you been so 
long ?” 

“ It’s a long story, sir,” replied Jack. 

Captain Wilson extended his hand and shook Jack’s heartily. 

“ At all events, I’m delighted to see you, boy : now sit down 
and tell me your story in a few words ; we will have it in detail 
by-and-bye.” 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


149 


" If you please, sir,” said Jack, “we captured that skip with 
the cutter the night after we went away — Pm not a first-rate 
navigator, and I was blown to the Zaffarine Islands, where I 
remained two months for want of hands : as soon as I procured 
them I made sail again — I have lost three men by sharks, and 
I have two wounded in to-day's fight — the ship mounts twelve 
guns, is half laden with lead and cotton prints, has fourteen 
thousand dollars in the cabin, and three shot-holes right through 
her — and the sooner you send some people on board of her the 
better.” 

This was not very intelligible, but that there were fourteen 
thousand dollars, and that she required hands sent on board, 
was very satisfactorily explained. Captain Wilson rang the 
bell, sent for Mr. Asper, who started back at the sight of our 
hero — desired him to order Mr. Jollifie to go on board with one 
of the cutters, send the wounded men on board, and take 
charge of the vessel, and then told Jack to accompany Mr. 
Jolliffe, and to give him every information ; telling him that he 
would hear his story to-morrow, when they were not so very 
busy. 


CHAPTER XVII. 

IN WHICH OUR HERO FINDS OUT THAT TRIGONOMETRY IS NOT ONLY 
NECESSARY TO NAVIGATION, BUT MAY BE REQUIRED IN SETTLING 
AFFAIRS OF HONOUR. 

As Captain Wilson truly said, fie was too busy, even to hear 
Jack's story that night, for they were anxious to have both ves- 
sels ready to make sail as soon as a breeze should spring up, for 
the Spaniards had vessels of war at Carthagena, which was not 
ten miles off, and had known the result of the action : it was 
therefore necessary to change them position as soon as possible 
Mr. Sawbridge was on board the prize, which was a corvette 


150 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


mounting two guns more than the Harpy, and called the Caca- 
fuogo. 

She had escaped from Cadiz, run through the straits in the 
night, and was three miles from Carthagena when she was cap- 
tured, which she certainly never would have been, but for Jack’s 
fortunately blundering against the cape with his armed vessel, 
so that Captain Wilson and Mr. Sawbridge (both of whom 
were promoted, the first to the rank of post-captain, the second 
to that of commander), may be said to be indebted to Jack for 
their good fortune. The Harpy had lost nineteen men, killed 
and wounded, and the Spanish corvette forty-seven. Alto- 
gether, it was a very creditable affair. 

At two o’clock in the morning, the vessels were ready, every 
thing had been done that could be done in so short a time, and 
they stood under easy sail during the night, for Gibraltar, the 
Nostra Senora del Carmen, under the charge of Jolliffe, keep- 
ing company. J olliffe had the advantage over his shipmates, of 
first hearing Jack’s adventures, with which he was much aston- 
ished as well as amused — even Captain Wilson was not more 
happy to see Jack than was the worthy master’s mate. About 
nine o’clock the Harpy hove to, and sent a boat on board for 
our hero, and the men who had been so long with him in the 
prize, and then hoisted out the pinnance to fetch on board the 
dollars, which were of more importance. Jack, as he bade 
adieu to Jolliffe, took out of his pocket, and presented him 
with the articles of war, which, as they had been so useful to 
him, he thought Jolliffe . could not do without, and then went 
down the side : the men were already in the boat, casting 
imploring looks upon Jack, to raise feelings of compassion, and 
Mesty took his seat by our hero in a very sulky humour, proba- 
bly because he did not like the idea of having again “ to boil 
de kettle for de young gentlemen.” Even Jack felt a little 
melancholy at resigning his command, and he looked back at 
the green petticoat, which blew out gracefully from the mast, 
for Jolliffe had determined that he would not haul down the 
colours under which Jack had fought so gallant an action. 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


151 


J ack’s narration, as may be imagined, occupied a large part 
of the forenoon ; and, although Jack did not attempt to deny 
that he had seen the recall signal of Mr. Sawbridge, yet, as his 
account went on, the captain became so interested, that at the 
end of it, he quite forgot to point out to Jack the impropriety 
of not obeying orders. He gave Jack great credit for his con- 
duct, and was also much pleased with that of Mesty. Jack 
took the opportunity of stating Mesty’s aversion to his present 
employment, and his recommendation was graciously received. 
Jack also succeeded in obtaining the pardon of the men, in con- 
sideration of their subsequent good behaviour ; but notwith- 
standing this promise on the part of Captain Wilson, they were 
ordered to be put in irons for the present. However, Jack told 
Mesty, and Mesty told the men, that they would be released 
with a reprimand when they arrived at Gibraltar, so all that 
the men cared for was a fair wind. 

Captain Wilson informed Jack, that after his joining the 
admiral he had been sent to Malta with the prizes, and that, 
supposing the cutter to have been sunk, he had written to his 
father, acquainting him with his son’s death, at which our hero 
was much grieved, for he knew what sorrow it would occasion, 
particularly to his poor mother. “ But,” thought Jack, “ if she 
is unhappy for three months, she will be overjoyed for three 
more when she hears that I am alive, so it will be all square at 
the end of the six ; and as soon as I arrive at Gibraltar I will 
write, and as the wind is fair, that will be to-morrow or next 
day.” 

After a long conversation, Jack was graciously dismissed, 
Captain Wilson being satisfied from what he had heard, that 
Jack would turn out a very good officer, and had already for- 
gotten all about equality and the rights of man; but there Cap- 
tain Wilson was mistaken— tares sown in infancy are not so 
soon rooted out. « 

Jack went on deck as soon as the Captain had dismissed him, 
and found the captain and officers of the Spanish corvette 
standing aft, looking very seriously at the Nosta Senora del 


152 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


r 

Carmen. When they saw our hero, whom Captain Wilson had 
told them was the young officer who had barred their entrance 
into Carthagena, they turned their eyes upon him, not quite so 
graciously as they might have done. 

Jack, with his usual politeness, took off his hat to the Span- 
ish captain, and, glad to have an opportunity of sporting his 
Spanish, expressed the usual wish, that he might live a thousand 
years. The Spanish captain, who had reason to wish that Jack 
had gone to the devil at least twenty-four hours before, was 
equally complimentary, and then begged to be informed what 
the colours were that Jack had hoisted during the action. 
J ack replied that they were the colours to which every Spanish 
gentleman considered it no disgrace to surrender, although al- 
ways ready to engage, and frequently attempting to board. 
Upon which the Spanish captain was very much puzzled. Cap- 
tain Wilson, who understood a little Spanish, then interrupted 
by observing, 

“ By-the-bye, Mr. Easy, what colours did you hoist up ? we 
could not make them out. I see Mr. J olliffe still keeps them 
up at the peak.” 

“Yes, sir,” replied Jack, rather puzzled what to call them, 
but at last he replied, “That it was the banner of equality and 
the rights of man.” 

Captain Wilson frowned, and Jack, perceiving that he was 
displeased, then told him the whole story, whereupon Captain 
Wilson laughed, and J ack then also explained, in Spanish, to 
the officers of the corvette, who replied, “ That it was not the 
first time, and would not be the last, that men had got into a 
scrape through a petticoat.” 

The Spanish captain eomplimented Jack on his Spanish, 
which was really very good (for in two months, with nothing 
else in the world to do, he had made great progress), and asked 
him where he had learnt it. 

Jack replied, “at the Zaffarine Islands.” 

“ Zaffarine Isles,” replied the Spanish captain, “ they are not 
inhabited.” 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


153 


“ Plenty of ground sharks,” replied Jack. 

The Spanish captain thought our hero a very strange fel- 
low, to fight under a green silk petticoat, and to take lessons 
in Spanish from the ground sharks. However, being quite as 
polite as Jack, he did not contradict him, but took a huge 
pinch of snuff, wishing from the bottom of his heart that the 
ground sharks had taken J ack before he had hoisted that con- 
founded green petticoat. 

However, J ack was in high favour with the captain and all 
the ship’s company, with the exception of his four enemies — 
the master, Vigors, the boatswain, and the purser’s steward. 
As for Mr. Vigors, he had come to his senses again, and had 
put his colt in his chest until Jack should take another cruise. 
Little Gossett, at any insulting remark made by Vigors, pointed 
to the window of the berth and grinned; and the very recollec- 
tion made Vigors turn pale, and awed him into silence. 

In two days they arrived at Gibraltar — Mr. Sawbridge re- 
joined the ship — so did Mr. Jolliffe — they remained there a 
fortnight, during which Jack was permitted to be continually 
on shore — Mr. Asper accompanied him, and J ack drew a heavy 
bill to prove to his father that he was still alive. Mr. Saw- 
bridge made our hero relate to him all his adventures, and was 
so pleased with the conduct of Mesty, that he appointed him to 
a situation which was particularly suited to him — that of ship’s 
corporal. Mr. Sawbridge knew that it was an office of trust, 
and provided that he could find a man fit for it, he was very 
indifferent about his color. Mesty walked and strutted about 
at least three inches taller than he was before. He was al- 
ways clean, did his duty conscientiously, and seldom used his 
cane. 

“ I think, Mr. Easy,” said the first lieutenant, “ that as you 
are so particularly fond of taking a cruise,” — for Jack had told 
the whole truth— 1 “ it might be as well that you improve your 
navigation.” 

“I do think myself, sir,” replied Jack with great modesty, 
“ that I am not yet quite perfect.” 

I* % 


154 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


“ Well, then, Mr. Jolliffe will teach you; he is the most com 
petent in this ship. The sooner you ask him the better, and il 
you learn it as fast as you have Spanish, it will not give you 
much trouble.” 

Jack thought the advice good: the next day he was very 
busy with his friend Jolliffe, and made the important discovery 
that two parallel lines continued to infinity would never meet. 

It must not be supposed that Captain Wilson and Mr. Saw- 
bridge received their promotion instanter. Promotion is al- 
ways attended with delay, as there is a certain routine in the 
service which must not be departed from. Captain Wilson had 
orders to return to Malta after his cruise. He therefore car- 
ried his own dispatches away from England — from Malta the 
dispatches had to be forwarded to Toulon to the admiral, and 
then the admiral had to send to England to the admiralty, 
whose reply had to come out again. All this, with the delays 
arising from vessels not sailing immediately, occupied an inter- 
val of between five and six months — during which time there 
was no alteration in the officers and crew of his majesty's sloop 
Harpy. 

There had, however, been one alteration: the gunnei, Mr. 
Minus, who had charge of the first cutter in the night action in 
which our hero was separated from his ship, carelessly loading 
his musket, had found himself minus his right hand, which, upon 
the musket going off as he rammed down, had gone off too. 
He was invalided and sent home during Jack's absence, and 
another had been appointed, whose name was Tallboys. Mr. 
Tallboys was a stout, dumpy man, with red face, and still red- 
der hands; he had red hair and red whiskers, and he had read 
a great deal — for Mr. Tallboys considered that the gunner was 
the most important personage in the ship. He had once been 
a captain's clerk, and having distinguished himself very much 
in cutting-out service, had applied for and received his warrant 
as a gunner. He had studied the “ Art of Gunnery,” a part oi 
which he understood, but the remainder was above his com- 
prehension : he continued, however, to read it as before, think- 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


155 


mg that by constant reading he should understand it at last 
He had gone through the work from the title-page to the finis, 
at least forty times, and had just commenced it over again. 
Ha. never came on deck without the gunner’s vade-mecum in 
his pocket, with his hand always upon it to refer to it in a mo- 
ment. 

But Mr. Tallboys had, as we observed before, a great idea 
of the importance of a gunner, and, among other qualifications, 
he considered it absolutely necessary that he should be a navi- 
gator. He had at least ten instances to bring forward of 
bloody actions, in which the captain and all the commissioned 
officers had been killed or wounded, and the command of the 
ship had devolved upon the gunner. 

“Now, sir,” would he say, “if the gunner is no navigator, 
he is not fit to take charge of his majesty’s ships. The boat- 
swain and carpenter are merely practical men ; but the gunner, 
sir, is, or ought to be, scientific. Gunnery, sir, is a science — 
we have our own disparts and our lines of sight— our windage 
and our parabolas and projectile forces — and our point blank, 
and our reduction of powder upon a graduated scale. Now, 
sir, there’s no excuse for a gunner not being a navigator; for 
knowing his duty as a gunner, he has the same mathematical 
tools to work with.” Upon this principle, Mr. Tallboys had 
added John Hamilton Moore to his library, andjiad advanced 
about as far into navigation as he had in gunnery, that is, to 
the threshold, where he stuck fast, with all his mathematical 
tools, which he did not know how to use. To do him justice, 
he studied for two or three hours every day, and it was not his 
fault if he did not advance — but his head was confused with 
technical terms; he mixed all up together, and disparts, sines 
and cosines, parabolas, tangents, windage, seconds, lines of 
sight, logarithms, projectiles and traverse sailing, quadrature 
and Gunter’s scales, were all crowded together in a brain which 
had not capacity to receive the rule of three. “Too much 
learning,” said Festus to the apostle, “ hath made thee mad.” 
Mr. Tallboys had not wit enough to go mad, but his learning 


156 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


lay like lead upon bis brain : the more he read, the less he under- 
stood, at the same time that he became more satisfied with his 
supposed acquirements, and could not speak but in “ mathe- 
matical parables.” 

“ I understand, Mr. Easy,” said the gunner to him one day, 
after they had sailed for Malta, “ that you have entered into 
the science of navigation — at your age it was high time.” 

“ Yes,” replied Jack, “ I can raise a perpendicular, at all 
events, and box the compass.” 

“Yes, but you have not yet arrived at the dispart of the 
compass.” 

“ Not come to that yet,” replied Jack. 

“ Are you aware that a ship sailing describes a parabola 
round the globe ?” 

“Not come to that yet,” replied Jack. 

“ And that any propelled body striking against another flies 
off at a tangent ?” 

“Very likely,” replied Jack ; “ that is a sine that he don’t 
like it.” 

“ You have not yet entered into acute trigonometry !” 

“ Not come to that yet,” replied Jack. 

“ That will require very sharp attention.” 

“I should think so,” replied Jack. 

“You will then find out how your parallels of longitude and 
latitude meet.” 

“ Two parallel lines, if continued to infinity, will never meet,” 
replied Jack. 

“I beg your pardon,” said the gunner. 

“ I beg yours,” said Jack. 

Whereupon Mr. Tallboys brought up a small map of the 
world, and showed Jack that all the parallels of latitude met 
at a point at the top and the bottom. 

“Parallel linek never meet,” replied Jack, producing Hamil- 
ton Moore. 

Whereupon Jack and the gunner argued the point, until it 
ras agreed to refer the case to Mr. Jolliffe, who asserted with 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


157 


a smile, “ That those lines were parallels and not paral- 
lels.” 

As both were right, both were satisfied. 

It was fortunate that Jack would argue in this instance : 
had he believed all the confused assertions of the gunner, he 
would have been as puzzled as the gunner himself. They never 
met without an argument and a reference, and as Jack was put 
right in the end, he only learnt the faster. By the time that 
he did know something about navigation, he discovered that his 
antagonist knew nothing. Before they arrived at Malta, Jack 
could fudge a day’s work. 

But at Malta Jack got into another scrape. Although Mr. 
Smallsole could not injure him, he was still Jack’s enemy ; the 
more so as Jack had become very popular : Vigors also sub- 
mitted, planning revenge ; but the parties in this instance were 
the boatswain and purser’s steward. Jack still continued his 
forecastle conversations with Mesty : and the boatswain and 
purser’s steward, probably from their respective ill-will towards 
our hero, had become great allies. Mr. Easthupp now put on 
his best jacket to walk the dog-watches with Mr. Biggs, and 
they took every opportunity to talk at our hero. 

“ It’s my peculiar hopinion,” said Mr. Easthupp, one even- 
ing, pulling at the frill of his shirt, “ that a gentleman should 
behave as a gentleman, and that if a gentleman professes 
opinions of hequality and such liberal sentiments, that he is 
bound as a gentleman to hact up to them.” 

“ Very true, Mr. Easthupp ; he is bound to act up to them ; 
and not because a person, who was a gentleman as well as 
himself, happens not to be on the quarter-deck, to insult him 
because he only has perfessed opinions liko his own.” 

Hereupon Mr. Biggs struck his rattan against the funne. 

and looked at our hero. 

% 

u Yes,” continued the purser’s steward, “ I should like to l < .6 
the fellow who would have done so on shore : however the 
time will come, when I can hagain pull on my plain coaC, and 
then the insult shall be vashed out in blood, Mr. Biggs.” 


158 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


“ And PH be cursed if I don’t some day teach a lesson to the 
blackguard who stole my trousers.” 

“Yas hall your money right, Mr. Biggs ?” inquired the pur- 
ser’s steward. 

« “ I didn’t count,” replied the boatswain, magnificently. 

“No — gentlemen are above that,” replied Easthupp ; “but 
there are many light-fingered gentry about. The quantity of 
vatches and harticles of value vich were lost when I valked 
Bond Street in former times is incredible.” 

“I can say this, at all events,” replied the boatswain, “that 
I should be always ready to give satisfaction to any person 
beneath me in rank, after I had insulted him. I don’t stand 
upon my rank, although I don’t talk about equality, damme — 
no, nor consort with niggers.” 

All this was. too plain for our hero not to understand, so 
Jack walked up to the boatswain, and taking his hat off, with 
the utmost politeness, said to him, 

“ If I mistake not, Mr. Biggs, your conversation refers to me.” 

“Very likely it does,” replied the boatswain. “Listeners 
hear no good of themselves.” 

“ It appears that gentlemen can’t converse without being 
vatched,” continued Mr. Easthupp, pulling up his shirt-collar. 

“It is not the first time that you have thought proper to 
make very offensive remarks, Mr. Biggs, and as you appear to 
consider yourself ill-treated in the affair of the trousers, for I 
tell you at once, that it was I who brought them on board, I 
can only say,” continued our hero, with a very polite bow, 
“ that I shall be most happy to give you satisfaction.” 

“I am your superior officer, Mr. Easy,” replied the boat- 
swain. 

“Yes, by the rules of the service ; but you just now asserted 
that you would waive your rank — indeed, I dispute it on this 
occasion ; I am>on the quarter-deck, and you are not.” 

“ This is the gentleman whom you have insulted, Mr. Easy,” 
replied the boatswain, pointing to the purser’s steward. 

“ Yes, Mr. Heasy, quite as good a gentleman as yourself. 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


159 


although I ay ad misfortunes — I ham of as hold a family as 
hany in the country,” replied Mr. Easthupp, now backed by 
the boatswain ; “ many the year did I valk Bond Street, and I 
ave as good blood in my wei&s as you, Mr. Heasy, halthough I 
have been misfortunate — I’ve had hadmirals in my family.” 

“You have grossly insulted this gentleman,” said Mr. Biggs, 
in continuation ; “ and notwithstanding all your talk of equality, 
you are afraid to give him satisfaction — you shelter yourself 
under your quarter-deck.” 

“ Mr. Biggs,” replied our hero, who was now very wroth, 
“ I shall go on shore directly we arrive at Malta. Let you 
and this fellow put on plain clothes, and I will meet you both 
— and then I’ll show you whether I am afraid to' give satisfac- 
tion.” 

“ One at a time,” said the boatswain. % 

“No, sir, not one at a time, but both at the same time — I 
will fight both or none. If you are my superior officer, you 
must descend ,” replied Jack, with an ironical sneer, “ to meet 
me, or I will not descend to meet that fellow, whom I believe 
to have been little better than a pickpocket.” 

This accidental hit of Jack’s made the purser’s steward turn 
pale as a sheet, and then equally red. He raved and foamed 
amazingly, although he could not meet Jack’s indignant look, 
who then turned round again. 

“Now, Mr. Biggs, is this to be understood, or do you shel- 
ter yourself under your forecastle ?” 

“ I’m no dodger,” replied the boatswain, “ and we will settle 
the affair at Malta.” 

At which reply Jack returned to Mesty. 

“ Massa Easy, I look at urn face, dat fello, Eastop, he no 
like it. I go shore wid you, see fair play anyhow — suppose I 
can ?” 

Mr. Biggs having declared that he would fight, of course had 
to look out for a second, and he fixed upon Mr. Tallboys, the 
gunner, and requested him to be his friend, Mr. Tallboys, who 
nad been lately very much annoyed by Jack’s victories over him 


160 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


in the science of navigation, and therefore felt ill-will towards 
him, consented ; but he was very much puzzled how to arrange 
that three were to fight at the same time, for he had no idea of 
there being two duels ; so he went* to his cabin and commenced 
reading. Jack, on the other hand, dared not say a word to 
Jolliffe on the subject : indeed, there was no one in the ship to 
whom he could confide but Gascoigne : he therefore went to 
him, and although Gascoigne thought it was excessively infra 
dig. of Jack to meet even the boatswain, as the challenge had 
been given there was no retracting : he therefore consented, like 
all midshipmen, anticipating fun, and quite thoughtless of the 
consequences. 

The second day after they had been anchored in Yallette 
harbour, the boatswain and gunner, Jack and Gascoigne, ob- 
tained permission to go on shore. Mr. Easthupp, the purser’s 
steward, dressed in his best blue coat with brass buttons and 
velvet collar, the very one in which he had been taken up when 
he had been vowing and protesting that he was a gentleman, at 
the very time that his hand was abstracting a pocket-book, 
went up on the quarter-deck, and requested the same indul- 
gence, but Mr. Sawbridge refused, as he required him to return 
staves and hoops at the cooperage. Mesty also, much to his 
mortification, was not to be spared. 

This was awkward, but it was got ever by proposing that 
the meeting should take place behind the cooperage at a certain 
hour, on which Mr. Easthupp might slip out, and borrow a 
portion of the time appropriated to his duty, to heal the breach 
in his wounded honour. So the parties all went on shore, 
and put up at one of the small inns, to make the necessary 
arrangements. 

Mr. Tallboys then addressed Mr. Gascoigne, taking him 
apart while the boatswain amused himself with a glass of grog, 
and our hero sat' outside, teazing a monkey. 

“ Mr. Gascoigne,” said the gunner, “ I have been very much 
puzzled how this duel should be fought, but I have at last found 
it out. You see that there are three parties to fight ; had there 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


161 


been two or four there would have been no difficulty, as the 
right line or square might guide us in that instance ; but we 
must arrange it upon the triangle in this.” 

Gascoigne stared ; he could not imagine what was coming. 

“Are you aware, Mr. Gascoigne, of the properties of an 
equilateral triangle ?” 

“Yes,” replied the midshipman, “that it has three equal 
sides — but what the devil has that to do with the duel ?” 

“ Everything, Mr. Gascoigne,” replied the gunner ; “ it has 
resolved the great difficulty : indeed, the duel between three 
can only be fought upon that principle. You observe,” said the 
gunner, taking a piece of chalk out of his pocket, and making a 
triangle on the table, “in this figure we have three points, each 
equidistant from each other ; and we have three combatants — 
so that placing one at each point, it is all fair play for the three ; 
Mr. Easy, for instance, stands here, the boatswain here, and the 
purser’s steward at the third corner. Now, if the distance is 
fairly measured, it will be all right.” 

“ But then,” replied Gascoigne, delighted at the idea, “ how 
are they to fire ?” 

“ It certainly is not of much consequence,” replied the gun- 
ner, “ but still, as sailors, it appears to me that they should 
fire with the sun ; that is, Mr. Easy fires at Mr. Biggs, Mr. 
Biggs fires at Mr. Easthupp, and Mr. Easthupp fires at Mr. 
Easy, so that you perceive that each party has his shot at one, 
and at the same time receives the fire of another.” 

Gascoigne was in ecstasies at the novelty of the proceeding, 
the more so as he perceived that Easy obtained every advan- 
tage by the arrangement. 

“ Upon my word, Mr. Tallboys, I give you great credit ; 
you have a profound mathematical head, and I am delighted 
with your arrangement. Of course, in these affairs, the princi- 
pals are bound to comply with the arrangements of the seconds, 
and I shall insist upon Mr. Easy consenting to your excellent 
and scientific proposal.” 

Gascoigne went out, and pulling Jack away from the 


162 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


monkey, told him what the gunner had proposed, at which 
Jack laughed heartily. 

The gunner also explained it to the boatswain, who did not 
very w r ell comprehend, but replied, — 

“ I dare say it’s all right — shot for shot, and d — n all 
favours.” 

The parties then repaired to the spot with two pairs of ship’s 
pistols, which Mr. Tallboys had smuggled on shore ; and, as 
soon as they were on the ground, the gunner called Mr.. East- 
hupp out of the cooperage. In the mean time, Gascoigne had 
been measuring an equilateral triangle of twelve paces — and 
marked it out. Mr. Tallboys, on his return with the purser’s 
steward, went over the ground, and finding that it was “ equal 
angles subtended by equal sides,” declared that it was all right. 
Easy took his station, the boatswain was put into his, and Mr. 
Easthupp, who was quite in a mystery, was led by the gunner 
to the third position. > 

“But, Mr. Tallboys,” said the purser’s steward, “I don’t 
understand this. Mr. Easy will first fight Mr. Biggs, will he 
not ?” 

“No,” replied the gunner, “this is a duel of three. You 
will fire at Mr. Easy, Mr. Easy will fire at Mr. Biggs, and Mr. 
Biggs will fire at you. It is all arranged, Mr. Easthupp.” 

“But,” said Mr. Easthupp, “I do not understand it. 
Why is Mr. Biggs to fire at me ? I have no quarrel with 
Mr. Biggs.” 

“ Because Mr. Easy fires at Mr. Biggs, and Mr. Biggs must 
have his shot as well.” 

“ If you have ever been in the company of gentlemen, Mr, 
Easthupp,” observed Gascoigne, “ you must know something 
about duelling.” 

“ Yes, yes, I’ve kept the best company, Mr. Gascoigne, and 
I can give a gentleman satisfaction ; but ” 

“ Then, sir, if that is the case, you must know that your 
honour is in the hands of your second, and that no gentleman 
appeals.” 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


163 


u Yes, yes, I know tliat Mr. Gascoigne ; but still I’ve no 
quarrel with Mr. Biggs, and therefore, Mr. Biggs, of course 
you will not aim at me.” 

“Why, you don’t think that I’m going to be fired at for 
nothing,” replied the boatswain ; “no, no, I’ll have my shot 
any how.” 

“ But at your friend, Mr. Biggs ?” 

“ All the same, I shall fire at somebody ; shot for shot, and 
hit the luckiest.” 

“Yel, gentlemen, I purtest against these proceedings,” 
replied Mr. Easthupp ; “ I came here to have satisfaction from 
Mr. Easy, and not to be fired at by Mr. Biggs.” 

“ Don’t you have satisfaction when you fire at Mr. Easy,” 
replied the gunner ; “ what more would you have ?” 

“ I purtest against Mr. Biggs firing at me.” 

“ So you would have, a shot without receiving one,” cried 
Gascoigne; “the fact is, that this fellow’s a confounded cow- 
ard, and ought to be kicked into the cooperage again.” 

At this affront Mr. Easthupp rallied, and accepted the pistol 
offered by the gunner. 

“ You ear those words, Mr. Biggs ; pretty language to use 
to a gentleman. You shall ear from me, sir, as soon as the 
ship is paid off. I purtest no longer, Mr. Tallboys ; death 
before dishonour. I’m a gentleman, damme !” 

At all events, the swell was not a very courageous gen- 
tleman, for he trembled most exceedingly as he pointed his 
pistol. ' • 

The gunner gave the word, as if he were exercising the great 
guns on board ship. 

“ Cock your locks !”■ — “ Take good aim at the object !” — • 
“ Eire !” — “ Stop your vents 1” 

The only one of the combatants who appeared to comply 
with the latter supplementary order was Mr. Easthupp, who 
clapped his hand to his trousers behind, gave a loud yell, and 
then dropped down ; the bullet having passed clean through 
his seat of honour, from his having presented his broadside as 


164 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


a target to the boatswain as he faced towards our hero. Jack’s 
shot had also taken effect, having passed through both the 
boatswain’s cheeks, without further mischief than extracting 
two of his best upper double teeth’ and forcing through the 
hole of the farther cheek the boatswain’s own quid of tobacco. 
As for Mr. Easthupp’s ball, as he was very unsettled, and 
shut his eyes before he fired, it had gone the Lord knows 
where. 

The purser’s steward lay on the ground and screamed — the 
boatswain spit his double teeth and two or three mouthfuls of 
blood out, and then threw down his pistols in a rage. 

“ A pretty business, by God,” sputtered he ; “ he’s put my 
pipe out. How the devil am I to pipe to dinner when I’m 
ordered, all my wind ’scaping through the cheeks ?” 

In the mean time, the others had gone to the assistance of 
the purser’s steward, who continued his vociferations. They 
examined him, and considered a wound in that part not to be 
dangerous. 

“ Hold your confounded bawling,” cried the gunner^ “ or 
you’ll have the guard down here : you’re not hurt.” 

“ Han’t hi ?” roared the steward : “ Oh, let me die, let me 
die ; don’t >move me !” 

“Nonsense,” cried the gunner, “you must get up and walk 
down to the boat ; if you don’t we’ll leave you — hold your 
tongue, confound you. You won’t ? then I’ll give you some- 
thing to halloo for.” 

^hereupon Mr. Tallboys commenced cuffing the poor w r retch 
right and left, who received so many swinging boxes of the 
ear, tho,t he was soon reduced to merely pitiful plaints of “ Oh, 
dear ! — such inhumanity — I purtest — oh dear ! must I get up ? 
I can’t, indeed.” 

“ I do not think he can move, Mr. Tallboys,” said Gascoigne ; 
“ I should think the best plan would be to call up two of the 
men from the cooperage, and let them take him at once to the 
hospital.” 

The gunner went down to the cooperage to call the men. 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


16 o 


Mr. Biggs, who had bound up his face as if he had a toothache, 
for the bleeding had been very slight, came up to the purser’s 
steward. 

“ What the hell are you making such a howling about ? 
Look at me, with two shot-holes through my figure-head, while 
you have only got one in your stern : I wish I could change 
with you, by heavens, for I could use my whistle then — now if 
I attempt to piper, there will be such a wasteful expenditure of 
his Majesty’s stores of wind, that I never shall get out a note. 
A wicked shot of yours, Mr. Easy.” 

“ I really am very sorry,” replied Jack, with a polite bow, 
“ and I beg to offer my best apology.” 

During this conversation, the purser’s steward felt very faint, 
and thought he was going to die. 

“ Oh dear ! oh dear ! what a fool I was ; I never was a gen- 
tleman — only a swell : I shall die ; I never will pick a pocket 
again — never — never — God forgive me 1” 

“ Why, confound the fellow,” cried Gascoigne, “ so you were 
a pickpocket, were you ?” 

“ I never will again,” replied the fellow in a faint voice : 
“ Hi’ll hamend and lead a good life — a drop of water — oh ! 
lagged at last !” 

Then the poor wretch fainted away : and Mr. Tallboys com- 
ing up with the men, he was taken on their shoulders and 
walked off to the hospital, attended by the gunner and also the 
boatswain, who thought he might as well have a little medical 
advice before he went on board. 

“ Well, Easy,” said Gascoigne, collecting the pistols and tying 
them up in his handkerchief, “ I’ll be shot, but we’re in a pretty 
scrape ; there’s no hushing this up. I’ll be hanged if I care, 
it’s the best piece of fun I ever met with.” And at the remem- 
brance of it Gascoigne laughed till the tears ran down his 
checks. Jack’s mirth was not quite so excessive, as he was 
afraid that the purser’s steward was severely hurt, and expressed 
his fears. 


166 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


“ At all events, you did not hit him,” replied Gascoigne ; 
“ all you have to answer for is the boatswain’s mug, — I think 
you’ve stopped his jaw for the future.” 

“ I’m afraid that our leave will be stopped for the future,” 
replied Jack. 

“JThat we may take our oaths of,” replied Gascoigne. 

“Then look you, Ned,” said Easy; “I’ve lots of dollars; 
we may as well be hanged for a sheep as a lamb, as the saying 
is ; I vote that we do not go on board.” 

“ Sawbridge will send and fetch us,” replied Ned ; “ but he 
must find us first.” 

“ That won’t take long, for the soldiers will soon have our 
description and rout us out — we shall be pinned in a couple of 
days.” 

“ Confound it, and they say that the ship is to be hove down, 
and that we shall be here six weeks at least, cooped up on 
board in a broiling sun, and nothing to do but to watch the 
pilot fish playing round the rudder, and munch bad apricots. I 
won’t go on board ; look ye, Jack,” said Gascoigne, “ have you 
plenty of money ?” 

“ I have twenty doubloons besides dollars,” replied Jack. 

“ Well, t then, we will pretend to be so much alarmed at the 
result of this duel, that we dare not show ourselves, lest we 
should be hung. I will write a note, and send it to Jolliffe, to 
say that we have hid ourselves until the affair is blown over, 
and beg him to intercede with the captain and first-lieutenant. 
I will tell him all the particulars, and refer to the gunner for the 
truth of it ; and then I know that, although we should be 
punished, they will only laugh ; but I will pretend that East- 
hupp is killed, and we are frightened out of our lives. That will 
be it ; and then let us go on board one of the speronares which 
come with fruit from Sicily, sail in the night for Palermo, and 
then we’ll hav^ a cruise for a fortnight, and when the money is 
all gone we’ll come back.” 

“ That’s a capital idea, Ned, and the sooner we do it the 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


161 


better. I will write to the captain, begging him to get me off 
from being hung, and telling him where we have fled to, and 
that letter shall be given after we have sailed.” 

They were two very nice lads — our hero and Gascoigne. 


CHAPTER XVIII. 

IN WHICH OUR HERO SETS OFF ON ANOTHER CRUISE, IN WHICH HE 
IS NOT BLOWN OFF SHORE. 

Gascoigne and our hero were neither of them in uniform, and 
they hastened to Nix Mangare stairs, where they soon picked 
up the padrone of a speronare. They went with him into a 
wine shop, and with the assistance of a little English from a 
Maltese boy, whose shirt hung out of his trousers, they made a 
bargain, by which it was agreed that, for the consideration of 
two doubloons, he would sail that evening and land them at 
Gergenti or some other town in Sicily, providing them with 
• something to eat and gregos to sleep on. 

Our two midshipmen then went back to the tavern from 
which they had set off to fight the duel, and ordering a good 
dinner to be served in a back room, they amused themselves 
with killing flies, as they talked over the events of the day, and 
waited for their dinner. 

As Mr. Tallboys did not himself think proper to go on board 
till the evening, and Mr. Biggs also wished it to be dark before 
he went up the ship’s side, the events of the duel did not transpire 
till the next morning. Even then it was not known from the 
boatswain or gunner, but by a hospital mate coming on board 
to inform the surgeon that there was one of their men wounded 
under their charge, but that he was doing very well. 

Mr. Biggs had ascended the side with his face bound up. 

“ Confound that Jack Easy,” said he, “ I have only been on 
leave twice since I sailed from Portsmouth — once I was obliged 


168 


AIR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


to come up the side without my trousers, and show my bare 
stern to the whole ship’s company, and now I am coming up, 
and dare not show my figure-head.” He reported himself to 
the officer of the watch, and hasting to his cabin, went to 
bed, and lay the whole night awake from pain, thinking what 
excuse he could possibly make for not coming on deck next 
morning to his duty. 

He was, however, saved this trouble, for Mr. Jolliffe brought 
the letter of Gascoigne up to Mr. Sawbridge, and the captain 
had received that of our hero. 

Captain Wilson came on board, and found that Mr. Saw- 
bridge could communicate all the particulars of which he had 
not been acquainted by Jack ; and after they had read over 
Gascoigne’s letter in the cabin, and interrogated Mr. Tallboys, 
who was sent down under an arrest, they gave free vent to 
their mirth. 

“ Upon my soul, there’s no end to Mr. Easy’s adventures,” 
said the captain, “ I could laugh at the duel, for after all, it is 
nothing — and he would have been let off with a severe repri- 
mand ; but the foolish boys have set off in a speronare to 
Sicily, and how the devil are we to get them back again ?” 

“They’ll come back, sir,” replied Sawbridge, “when all their 
money’s gone.” 

“Yes, if they do not get into any more scrapes — that young 
scamp, Gascoigne, is as bad as Easy, and now they are together 
there’s no saying what may happen. I dine at the governor’s 
to-day ; how he will laugh when I tell him of this new way of 
fighting a duel 1” 

“ Yes, sir, it is just the thing that will tickle old Tom.” 

“We must find out if they have got off the island, Saw- 
bridge, which may not be the case.” 

But it was the case. Jack and Gascoigne had eaten a very 
good dinner, spnt for the monkey to amuse them till it was 
dark, and there had waited till the padrone came to them. 

“ What shall we do with the pistols, Easy ?” 

“ Take them with us, and load them before we go — we may 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY, 


169 


want them ; who knows but there may be a mutiny on board 
of the speronare ? — I wish we had Mesty with us.” 

They loaded the pistols, took a pair each, and put them in 
their waists, concealed under their clothes — divided the ammu- 
nition between them, and soon afterwards the padrone came to 
tell them all was ready. 

Whereupon Messrs. Gascoigne and Easy paid their bill, and 
rose to depart, but. the padrone informed them that he should 
like to see the colour of their money before they went on board. 
Jack, very indignant at the insinuation that he had not suffi- 
cient cash, pulled out a handful of doubloons, and tossing two 
to the padrone, asked him if he was satisfied. 

The padrone untied his sash, put in the money, and with 
many thanks and protestations of service, begged our young 
gentlemen to accompany him : they did so, and in a few 
minutes were clear of Nix Mangare stairs, and, passing close 
to his Majesty’s ship Harpy, were soon out of the harbour of 
Yallette. 

Of all tHe varieties of vessels which float upon the wave, 
there is not, perhaps, one that bounds over the water so grace- 
fully or so lightly as a speronare, or any one so picturesque and 
beautiful to the eye of those who watch its progress. 

The night was clear, and the stars shone out brilliantly, as 
the light craft skimmed over the water, and a fragment of a 
descending and waning moon threw its soft beams upon the 
snow-white sail. The vessel, which had no deck, was full of 
baskets, which had contained grapes and various fruits brought 
from the ancient granary of Rome, still as fertile and as lux- 
uriant as ever. The crew consisted of the padrone, two men 
and a boy ; the three latter, with their gregos, or night great- 
coats with hoods, sitting forward before the sail, with their 
eyes fixed on the land as they flew past point after point, 
thinking, perhaps, of their wives, or perhaps of their sweet- 
hearts, or perhaps not thinking at all. 

The padrone remained aft at the helm, offering every polite- 
ness to our two young gentlemen, who only wished to be left 

8 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


no 

alone. At last they requested the padrone to give them 
gregos to lie down upon, as they wished to go to sleep. He 
called the boy to take the helm, procured them all they re- 
quired, and then went forward. And onr two midshipmen laid 
down looking at the stars above them, for some minutes, with- 
out exchanging a word. At last Jack commenced. 

“ I have been thinking, Gascoigne, that this is very delight- 
ful. My heart bounds with the vessel, and it almost appears 
to me as if the vessel herself was rejoicing in her liberty. Here 
she is capering over the waves instead of being tied by the nose 
with a cable and anchor.” 

“That’s a touch of the sentimental, Jack,” replied Gas- 
coigne ; “ but she is no more free than she was when at anchor, 
for she now is forced to act in obedience to her steersman, and 
go just where he pleases. You may just as well say that a 
horse, if taken out of the stable, is free, with the curb, and his 
rider on his back.” 

“That’s a touch of the rational, Ned, which destroys the 
illusion. Never mind, we are free, at all events. What 
machines we are on board of a man-of-war ? We w T alk, talk, 
eat, drink, sleep, and get up, just like clock-work ; we are 
wound up to go the twenty-four hours, and then wound up 
again ; just like old Smallsole does the chronometers.” 

“Very true, Jack; but it does not appear to me, that, 
hitherto, you have kept very good time : you require a little 
more regulating,” said Gascoigne. 

“ How can you expect any piece of machinery to go well, so 
damnably knocked about as a midshipman is ?” replied our hero, 

“Very true, Jack ; but sometimes you don’t keep any time, 
for you don’t keep any watch. Mr. Asper don’t wind you up. 
You don’t go at all.” 

“No ; because he allows me to go down ; but still I do go, 
Ned.” , 

“Yes, to your hammock — but it’s no go with old Smallsole, 
if I want a bit of caulk. But, J ack, what do you say — shall 
we keep watch to-night ?” 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


m 

“Why, to tell you the truth, I have been thinking the 
same thing — I don’t much like the looks of the padrone — he 
squints.” 

“ That’s no proof of any thing, Jack, except that his eyes 
are not straight : but if you do not like the look of him, I can 
tell you that he very much liked the look of your doubloons — 
I saw him start, and his eyes twinkled, and I thought at the 
same time it was a pity you had not paid him in dollars.” 

“ It was very foolish in me ; but at all events he has not 
seen all.” 

“ He saw quite enough, Ned.” 

“Very true, but you should have let him see the pistols, and 
not have let him see the doubloons.” 

“Well, if he wishes to take what he has seen, he shall 
receive what he has not seen — why, there are only four of 
them ?” 

“ Oh, I have no fear of them, only it may be as well to sleep 
with one eye open.” 

“ When shall we make the land ?” 

“To-morrow evening with this wind, and it appears to be 
steady. Suppose we keep watch and watch, and have our 
pistols out ready, with the great coats just turned over them, 
to keep them out of sight ?” 

“Agreed — it’s about twelve o’clock now — who shall keep 
the middle watch ?” 

“ I will, Jack, if you like it.” 

“Well, then, mind you kick me hard, for I sleep devilish 
sound. Good night, and keep a sharp look-out.” 

Jack was fast asleep in less than ten minutes ; and Gas- 
coigne, with his pistols lying by him all ready for each hand 
sat up at the bottom of the boat. 

There certainly is a peculiar providence in favour of midship 
men compared with the rest of mankind ; they have more lives 
than a cat — always in the greatest danger, but always escaping 
from it. 

The padrone of the vessel had been captivated with the 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


172 

doubloons which Jack had so foolishly exposed to his view, 
and he had, moreover, resolved to obtain them. At the very 
time that our two lads were conversing aft, the padrone was 
talking the matter over with his two men forward, and it was 
agreed that they should murder, rifle, and then throw them 
overboard. 

About two o’clock in the morning, the padrone came aft to 
see if they were asleep, but found Gascoigne watching. He 
returned aft again and again, but found the young man still 
sitting up. Tired of waiting, anxious to possess the money, 
and not supposing that the lads were armed, he went once 
more forward and spoke to the men. Gascoigne had watched 
his motions ; he thought it singular, that with three men in 
the vessel, the helm should be confided to the boy — and at last 
he saw them draw their knives. He pushed our hero, who 
woke immediately. Gascoigne put his hand over Jack’s mouth, 
that he might not speak, and then whispered his suspicions. 
Jack seized his pistols — they both cocked them without noise, 
and then waited in silence, Jack still lying down while Gas- 
coigne continued to sit up at the bottom of the boat. At last 
Gascoigne saw the three men coming aft — he dropped one of 
his pistols for a second to give Jack a squeeze of the hand, 
which was returned, and as Gascoigne watched them making 
their way through the piles of empty baskets he leaned back as 
if he was slumbering. The padrone, followed by the two men, 
was at last aft, — they paused a moment before they stepped 
over the strengthening plank, which ran from side to side of 
the boat between them and the midshipmen, and as neither of 
them stirred, they imagined that both were asleep — advanced 
and raised their knives, when Gascoigne and Jack, almost at 
the same moment, each discharged their pistols into the breast 
of the padrone and one of the men, who was with him in ad- 
vance, who botji fell with the send aft of the boat, so as to 
encumber the midshipmen with the weight of their bodies. The 
third man started back. Jack, who could not rise from the 
padrone lying across his legs, took a steady aim with his 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


173 

second pistol, and the third man fell. The boy at the helm, 
who, it appeared,- either was aware of what was to be done, or 
seeing the men advance with their knives, had acted upon what 
he saw, also drew his knife and struck at Gascoigne from 
behind ; and the knife fortunately, after slightly wounding 
Gascoigne on the shoulder, had shut on the boy’s hand — Gas- 
coigne sprang up with his other pistol, the boy started back at 
the sight of it, lost his balance, and fell overboard. 

Our two midshipmen took a few seconds to breathe. . 

“ I say, Jack,” said Gascoigne, at last, “ did you ever ?” 

“No, I never — — ” replied Jack. 

“ What’s to be done now ?” 

“ Why, as we’ve got possession, Ned, we had better put a 
man at the helm — for the speronare is having it all her own 
way.” 

“ Very true,” replied Gascoigne ; “ and as I can steer better 
than you, I suppose it must be me.” 

Gascoigne went to the helm, brought the boat up to the 
wind, and then they resumed their conversation. 

“ That rascal of a boy gave me a devil of a lick on the 
shoulder ; I don’t know whether he has hurt me — at all events 
its my left shoulder, so I can steer just as well. I wonder 
whether the fellows are dead.” 

“ The padrone is, at all events,” replied Jack. “ It was as 
much as I could do to get -my legs from under him — but we’ll 
wait till daylight before we see to that — in the meantime, I’ll 
load the pistols again.” 

“ The day is breaking now — it will be light in half an hour 
or less. What a devil of a spree, Jack !” 

“ Yes, but how can one help it ? We ran away because two 
men are wounded — and now we are obliged to kill four in self- 
defence.” 

“ Yes, but that is not the end of it ; when we get to Sicily 
what are we to do ? We shall be imprisoned by the authority * 
— perhaps hung.” 

“ We’ll argue that point with them,” replied Jack. 


114 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


“We had better argue the point between ourselves, Jack, 
and see what will be the best plan to get out of our scrape.” 

“ I think that we just have got out of it — never fear but 
we’ll get out of the next. Do you know, Gascoigne, it appears 
to me very odd, but I can do nothing but there’s a bobbery at 
the bottom of it.” 

“You certainly have a great talent that way, Jack. Don’t 
I hear one of these poor fellows groan ?” 

“ I should think that not impossible.” 

“ What shall we do with them ?” 

“We will argue that point, Ned — we must either keep their 
bodies, or we must throw them overboard. Either tell the 
whole story, or say nothing about it.” 

“ That’s very evident ; in short, we must do something, for 
your argument goes no further. But now let us take up one of 
your propositions.” 

“ Well, then, suppose we keep the bodies on board, run 
into a sea-port, go to the authorities, and state all the facts, 
what then ?” 

“We shall prove, beyond all doubt, that we have killed 
three men, if not four ; but we shall not prove that we were 
obliged so t<? do, Jack. And then we are heretics — we shall 
be put in prison till they are satisfied of our innocence, which 
we never can prove, and there we shall remain until we have 
written to Malta, and a man-of-war comes to redeem us, if we 
are not stabbed, or something else, in the meantime.” 

“ That will not be a very pleasant cruise,” replied Jack. 
“ Now let’s argue the point on the other side.” 

“ There’s some difficulty there — suppose we throw their 
bodies overboard, toss the baskets after them, wash the boat 
clean, and make for the first port. We may chance to hit 
upon the very spot from which they sailed, and then there 
will be a pack ^ of wives and children, and a populace with 
knives, asking us what has become of the men of the boat ?” 

“ I don’t much like the idea of that,” said Jack. 

“ And if we don’t have such bad luck, still we shall be 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


115 


Interrogated as to who we are, and how we were adrift by 
ourselves.” 

“ There will be a difficulty about that again — we must 
swear that it is a party of pleasure, and that we are gentlemen 
yachting” 

“Without a crew or provisions — yachts don’t sail with a 
clean-swept hold, or gentlemen without a spare shirt — we have 
nothing but two gallons of water and two pairs of pistols.” 

“I have it,” said Jack — “we are two young gentlemen in our 
own boat who went out to Gozo with pistols to shoot sea-mews, 
were caught in a gale and blown down to Sicily — that will 
excite interest.” 

“ That’s the best idea yet, as it will account for our having 
nothing in the boat. Well, then, at all events, we will get rid 
of the bodies ; but suppose they are not dead — we cannot 
throw them overboard alive — that will be murder.” 

“ Very true,” replied Jack ; “ then we must shoot them first, 
and toss them overboard afterwards.” 

“ Upon my soul, Easy, you are an odd fellow ; however, go 
and examine the men, and we’ll decide that point by-and-by — 
you had better keep your pistols ready cocked, for they may 
be shamming.” 

“ Devil a bit of sham here, anyhow,” replied Jack, pulling 
at the body of’ the padrone, ““and as for this fellow you shot, 
you might put your fist into his chest. Now for the third,” 
continued Jack, stepping over the strengthening piece — “ he’s 
all among the baskets. I say, my cock, are you dead ?” and 
Jack enforced his question with a kick in the ribs. The man 
groaned. “ That’s unlucky, Gascoigne, but, however, I’ll soon 
settle him,” said Jack, pointing his pistol. 

“ Stop, Jack,” cried Gascoigne, “ it really will be murder.” 

“ No such thing, Ned ; I’ll just blow his brains out, and 
then I’ll come aft and argue the point with you.” 

“ Now do oblige me by coming aft and arguing the point 
first. Do, Jack, I beg of you — I entreat you.” 

“ With all my heart,” replied Jack, resuming his seat by 


m 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


Gascoigne; ‘‘I assert, that in this instance, killing’s no murder 
You will observe, Ned, that by the laws of society, any one 
who attempts the life of another has forfeited his own ; at the 
same time, as it is necessary that the fact should be clearly 
proved, and justice be duly administered, the parties are tried, 
convicted, and then are sentenced to the punishment.” 

“ I grant all that.” 

In this instance, the attempt has been clearly proved ; we 
are the witnesses, and are the judges and jury, and society in 
general, for the best of all possible reasons, because there is 
nobody else. These men’s lives being therefore forfeited to 
society, belong to us ; and it does not follow because they were 
not all killed in the attempt, that therefore they are not now to 
be brought out for punishment. And as there is no common 
hangman here, we, of course, must do this duty *as well as 
every other. I have now clearly proved that I am justified in 
what I am about to do. But the argument does not stop 
there — self-preservation is the first law of nature, and if we do 
not get rid of this mem, what is the consequence ? — that we 
shall have to account for his being wounded, and then, instead 
of judges, we shall immediately be placed in the position of 
culprits, and have to defend ourselves without witnesses. We 
therefore risk our lives from a misplaced lenity towards a 
wretch unworthy to live.” 

“ Your last argument is strong, Easy, but I cannot consent 
to your doing what may occasion you uneasiness hereafter 
when you think of it.” 

“ Pooh ! nonsense — I am a philosopher.” 

“ Of what school, Jack ? Oh, I presume, you are disciple 
of Mesty’s. I do not mean to say that you are wrong, but still 
hear my proposition. Let us lower down the sail, and then I 
can leave the helm to assist you. W e will clear the vessel of 
every thing except the man who is still alive. At all events, 
we may wait a little, and if at last there is no help for it, I 
vill then agree with you to launch him overboard, even if he 
is not quite dead.” 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


Itf 


“ Agreed ; even by your own making out, it will be no great 
sin. He is half dead already — I only do half the work of tos- 
sing him over, so it will be only quarter murder on my part, 
and he would have shown no quarter on his.” Here Jack left 
off arguing and punning, and went forward and lowered down 
the sail. “ I’ve half a mind to take my doubloons back,” said 
Jack, as they launched over the body of the padrone, “ but he 
may have them — I wonder whether they’ll ever turn up again.” 

“ Not in our time, Jack,” replied Gascoigne. 

The other body, and all the basket lumber, &c., were then 
tossed over, and the boat was cleared of all but the man who 
was not yet dead. 

“Now let’s examine the fellow, and see if he has any chance 
of recovery,” said Gascoigne. 

The man lay on his side ; Gascoigne turned him over, and 
found tliat he was dead. 

^ Over with him, quick,” said Jack, “ before he comes to life 
again.” 

The body disappeared under the wave — they again hoisted 
the sail, Gascoigne took the helm, and our hero proceeded to 
draw water and wash away the stains of blood ; he then cleared 
the boat of vine-leaves and rubbish, with which it was strewed, 
swept it clean fore and aft, and resumed his seat by his com- 
rade. 

“ There,” said Jack, “ now we’ve swept the decks, we may 
pipe to dinner. I wonder whether there is any thing to eat in 
the locker ?” 

Jack opened it, and found some bread, garlic, sausages, a 
bottle of aquadente, and a jar of wine. 

“ So the padrone did keep his promise, after all.” 

A Yes, and had you not tempted him with the sight of so 
much gold, might now have been alive.” 

“ To which I reply, that if you had not advised our going 
in a speronare, he would now have been alive.” 

“ And if you had not fought a duel, I should not have given 
the advice.” 


8* 


178 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


“And if the boatswain had not been obliged to come on 
board without his trousers, at Gibraltar, I should not have 
fought a duel.” 

“ And if you had not joined the ship, the boatswain would 
have had his trousers on.” 

“ And if my father had not been a philosopher, I should not 
have gone to sea ; so that it is all my father’s fault, and he has 
killed four men off the coast of Sicily, without knowing it — 
cause and effect. After all, there’s nothing like argument ; so 
having settled that point, let us go to dinner.” 

Having finished their meal, Jack went forward and observed 
the land ahead ; they steered the same course for three or four 
hours. 

“We must haul our wind more,” said Gascoigne ; “it will 
not do to put into any small town : we ha,ve now to choose, 
whether we shall land on the coast and sink the speronare, or 
land at some large town.” 

“We must argue that point,” replied Jack. 

“ In the meantime, do you take the helm, for my arm is quite 
tired,” replied Gascoigne : “ you can steer well enough : by- 
the-bye, I may as well look at my shoulder, for it is quite stiff.” 
Gascoigne pulled of his coat, and found his shirt bloody and 
sticking to the wound, which, as we before observed, was slight. 
He again took the helm, while Jack washed it clean and then 
bathed it with aquadente. 

“ Now take the helm again,” said Gascoigne ; “ I’m on the 
sick list.” 

“ And as surgeon — I’m an idler,” replied Jack ; “ but what 
shall we do ?” continued he ; “ abandon the speronare at night 
and sink her, or run in for a town ?” 

“ We shall fall in with plenty of boats and vessels if we coast 
it up to Palermo, and they may overhaul us.” 

“We shall fyll in with plenty of people if we go on shore, 
and they will overhaul us.” 

“Ho you know, Jack, that I wish we were back and along- 
side of the Harpy ; I’ve had cruising enough.” 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


119 


“ My cruises are so unfortunate,” replied Jack ; “ they are 
too full of adventure ; but then, I liave«never yet had a cruise 
on shore. Now, if we could only get to Palermo, we should 
' be out of all our difficulties.” 

“ The breeze freshens, Jack,” replied Gascoigne ; “ and it 
begins to look very dirty to windward. I think we shall have 
a gale.” 

“ Pleasant — I know what it is to be short-handed in a gale ; 
however, there’s one comfort, we shall not be blown off shore 
this time.” 

“ No, but we may be wrecked on a lee shore. She cannot 
carry her whole sail, Easy ; we must lower it down, and take 
in a reef ; the sooner the better, for it will be dark in an hour. 
Go forward and lower it down, and then Pll help you.” 

J ack did so, but the sail went into the water, and he could 
not drag it in. 

“ Avast heaving,” said Gascoigne, “ till I throw her up and 
take the wind out of it.” 

This was done ; they reefed the sail, but could not hoist it up : 
if Gascoigne left the helm to help Jack, the sail filled ; if he 
went to the helm and took the wind out of the sail, Jack was 
not strong enough to hoist it. The wind increased rapidly, and 
the sea got up ; the sun went down, and with the sail half 
hoisted, they could not keep to the wind, but were obliged to 
run right for the land. The speronare flew, rising on the crest 
of the waves with half her keel clear of the water : the moon 
was already up and gave them light enough to perceive that 
they were not five miles from the coast, which was lined with 
foam. 

“ At all events, they can’t accuse us of running away with 
the boat,” observed Jack ; “for she’s running away with us.” 

“ Yes,” replied Gascoigne, dragging at the tiller with all his 
strength ; “she has taken the bit between her teeth.” 

“ I wouldn’t care if I had a bit between mine,” replied Jack % 
“for I feel devilish hungry again. What do you say, 
Ned ?” 


180 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


“ With all my heart,” replied Gascoigne ; “ but, do you 
know, Easy, it may be the last meal we ever make.” 

“ Then I vote it’s a good one — but why so, Ned ?” 

“ In half-an-hour, or thereabouts, we shall be on shore.” 

“ Well, that’s where we waut to go.” 

“Yes, but the sea runs high, and the boat may be dashed to 
pieces on the rocks.” 

“ Then we shall be asked no questions about her or the 
men.” 

“ Very true, but a lee shore is no joke ; we may be knocked 
to pieces, as well as the boat — even swimming may not help us. 
If we could find a cove or sandy beach, we might, perhaps, 
manage to get on shore.” 

“ Well,” replied Jack. “ I have not been long at sea, and, 
of course, cannot know much about these things. I have been 
blown off shore, but I never have been blown on. It may be 
as you say, but I do not see the great danger — let’s run hei 
right upon the beach at once.” 

“ That’s what I shall try to do,” replied Gascoigne, who 
had been four years at sea, and knew very well what he was 
about. 

Jack handed him a huge piece of bread and sausage. 

“ Thank ye, I caunot eat.” 

“ I can,” replied Jack, with his mouth full. 

Jack ate while Gascoigne steered ; and the rapidity with 
which the speronare rushed to the beach was almost frightful. 
She darted like an arrow from wave to wave, and appeared as 
if mocking their attempts as they curled their summits almost 
over her narrow stern. They were within a mile of the beach, 
when Jack, who had finished his supper, and was looking at the 
foam boiling on the coast, exclaimed, 

“ That’s very fine — very beautiful, upon my soul !” 

“ He cares for nothing,” thought Gascoigne, “ he appears to 
have no idea of danger.” 

“Now, my dear fellow,” said Gascoigne, “ in a few minutes 
we shall be on the rocks. I must continue at the helm, for the 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


181 


higher she is forced up the better chance for us ; but we may 
not meet again, so if we do not, good-bye, and God bless you.” 

“ Gascoigne,” said Jack, “you are hurt and I am not ; your 
shoulder is stiff, and you can hardly move your left arm. Now 
I can steer for the rocks as well as you. Do you go to the bow, 
and there you will have a better chance. — By-the-bye,” con- 
tinued he, picking up his pistols, and sticking them into his 
waist, “ I won’t leave them, they’ve served us too a good turn 
already. Gascoigne, give me the helm.” 

“No, no, Easy.” 

“ I say yes,” replied Jack, in a loud, authoritative tone, “ and 
what’s more, I will be obeyed, Gascoigne. I have nerve, if I 
haven’t knowledge, . and at all events, I can steer for the beach. 
I tell you, give me the helm. — Well, then, if you won’t, — I must 
take it.” 

Easy wrested the tiller from Gascoigne’s hand, and gave him 
a shove forward. 

“ Now do you look out ahead, and tell me how to steer.” 

Whatever may have been Gascoigne’s feelings at this beha- 
viour of our hero’s, it immediately occurred to him, that he 
could do no better than to run the speronare to the safest 
point, and that therefore he was probably more advantageously 
employed, than if he were at the helm. He went forward and 
looked at the rocks, covered at one moment with the tumultuous 
waters, and then pouring down cascades from their sides as the 
waves recoiled. He perceived a chasm right ahead, and he 
thought if the boat was steered for that, she must be thrown 
up so as to enable them to get clear of her, for, at every other 
port, escape appeared impossible. 

“Starboard a little— that’ll do. Steady— port it is— port. 
—Steer small, for your life, Easy. Steady now— mind the yard 
don’t hit your head — hold on.” 

The speronare was at this moment thrown into a large cleft 
in a rock, the sides of which were nearly perpendicular ; nothing 
else could have saved them, as, had they struck the rock out- 
side, the boat would have been dashed to pieces, and its frag* 


182 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


ments have disappeared in the undertow. As it was, the cleft 
was not four feet more than the width of the boat, and as the 
waves hurled her up into it, the yard of the speronare was 
thrown fore and aft with great violence, and had not Jack been 
warned, he would have been struck overboard without a chance 
of being saved ; but he crouched down, and it passed over him. 
As the water receded, the boat struck, and was nearly dry be- 
tween the rocks, but another wave followed, dashing the boat 
further up, but, at the same time, filling it with water. The 
bow of the boat was now several feet higher than the stern, 
where Jack held on ; and the weight of the water in her, with 
the force of the returning waves, separated her right across 
abaft the mast. Jack perceived that the after-part of the boat 
was going out again with the wave ; he caught hold of the 
yard which had swung fore and aft, and as he clung to it, the 
part of the boat on which he stood disappeared from under him, 
and was swept away by the returning current. 

Jack required the utmost of his strength to maintain his 
position until another wave floated him, and dashed him higher 
up : but he knew his life depended on holding on to the yard, 
which he did, although under water, and advanced several feet. 
When the wave receded, he found footing on the rock, and still 
clinging, he walked till he had gained the fore-part of the boat, 
which was wedged firmly into a narrow part of the cleft. The 
next wave was not very large, and he had gained so much that 
it did not throw him off his legs. He reached the rock, and as 
he climbed up the side of the chasm to gain the ledge above, 
he perceived Gascoigne standing above him, and folding out 
his hand to his assistance. 

“Well,” says Jack, shaking himself to get rid of the water, 
11 here we are, ashore at last — I had no idea of anything like this. 
The rush back of the water was so strong that it has almost 
torn my arms out of their sockets. How very lucky I sent you 
forward with your disabled shoulder, By-the-bye, now that it’s 
all over, and you must see that I was right, I beg to apologise 
for my rudeness ” 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


183 


“ There needs no apology for saving my life, Easy,” replied 
Gascoigne, trembling with the cold ; “ and no one but you would 
ever have thought of making one at such a moment.” 

“ I wonder whether the ammunition's dry,” said Jack, “ I put 
it all in my hat.” 

J ack took off his hat, and found the cartridges had not suf- 
fered. 

“ Now, then, Gascoigne, what shall we do ?” 

“ I hardly know,” replied Gascoigne. 

“ Suppose, then, we sit down and argue the point.” 

“ No, I thank you, there will be too much cold water thrown 
upon our arguments — I'm half dead ; let us walk on.” 

“ With all my heart,” said Jack, “ it's devilish steep, but I can 
argue up hill or down hill, wet or dry — I'm used to it, — for, as I 
told you before, Ned, my father is a philosopher, and so am I.” 

“ By the Lord ! you are,” replied Gascoigne, as he walked on. 


CHAPTER XIX. 

IN WHICH OUR HERO FOLLOWS HIS DESTINY AND FORMS A TABLEAU 

Our hero and his comrade climbed the precipice, and, after 
some minutes' severe toil, arrived at the sumpiit, when they sat 
down to recover themselves. The sky was clear, although the 
gale blew strong. They had an extensive view of the coast, 
lashed by the angry waves. 

“ It's my opinion, Ned,” said Jack, as he surveyed the ex- 
panse of troubled water, “ that we’re just as well out of that.” 

“ I agree with you, Jack ; but it's also my opinion that we 
should be just as well out of this, for the wind blows through 
one. Suppose we go a little farther inland, where we may find 
some shelter till the morning.” 

“ Tt's rather dark to find anything,” rejoined our hero ; “but 


184 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


however, a westerly gale on the top of a mountain with wet 
clothes in the middle of the night, with nothing to eat or drink, 
is not the most comfortable position in the world, and we may 
change for the better.” 

They proceeded over a flat of a hundred yards, and then de- 
scended — the change in the atmosphere- was immediate. As 
they continued their march inland, they came to a high road, 
which appeared to run along the shore, and they turned into 
it ; for, as Jack said very truly, a road must lead to something. 
After a quarter of an hour’s walk, they again heard the rolling 
of the surf, and perceived the white walls of houses. 

“ Here we are at last,” said Jack. “ I wonder if any one 
will turn out to take us in, or shall we stow away for the night 
in one of those vessels hauled up on the beach ?” 

“ Recollect this time, Easy,” said Gascoigne, “ not to show 
your money ; that is, show only a dollar, and say you have no 
more, or promise to pay when we arrive at Palermo ; and if 
they will neither trust us, nor give to us, we must make it out 
as we can.” 

“ How the cursed dogs bark ! I think we shall do very well 
this time, Gascoigne : we do not look as if we were worth rob- 
bing, at all events, and we have the pistols to defend ourselves 
with if we are attacked. Depend upon it I will show no more 
gold. And now let us make our arrangements. Take you one 
pistol, and take half the gold — I have it all in my right-hand 
pocket — my dollars and pistarenes in my left. You shall take 
half of them, too. We have silver enough to go on with till 
we are in a safe place.” 

Jack then divided the money in the dark, and also gave 
Gascoigne a pistol. 

“Now then, shall we knock for admittance ?— Let’s first 
walk through the village, and see if there’s any thing like an 
inn. Those yelping curs will soon be at our heels ; they come 
nearer and nearer every time. There’s a cart, and its full of 
straw — suppose we go to bed till to-morrow morning — we shall 
be warm, at all events.” 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


185 


11 Yes,” replied Gascoigne, “ and sleep much better than in 
any of the cottages. I have been in Sicily before, and you have 
no idea how the fleas bite.” 

Our two midshipmen climbed up into the cart, nestled them- 
selves into the straw, or rather Indian corn leaves, and were 
soon fast asleep. As they had not slept for two nights, it is 
not to be wondered at that they slept soundly — so soundly in- 
deed, that about two hours after they had got into their com- 
fortable bed, the peasant, who had brought to the village some 
casks of wine to be shipped and taken down the coast in a 
felucca, yoked his bullocks, and not being aware of his freight, 
drove off without, in any way, disturbing their repose, although 
the roads in Sicily are not yet macadamised. 

The jolting of the roads rather increased than disturbed the 
sleep of our adventurers ; and, although there were some rude 
shocks, it only had the effect of making them fancy in their 
dreams that they were again in the boat, and that she was 
still dashing against the rocks. In about two hours the cart 
arrived at its destination — the peasant unyoked his bullocks and 
led them away. The same cause will often produce contrary 
effects : the stopping of the motion of the cart disturbed the 
rest of our two midshipmen ; they turned round in the straw, 
yawned, spread out their arms, and then awoke. Gascoigne, 
who felt considerable pain in his shoulder, was the first to recall 
his scattered senses. 

“ Easy,” cried he, as he sat up and shook off the corn-leaves. 

“ Port it is,” said Jack, half dreaming. 

“ Come, Easy, you are not on board now. Rouse and bitt.” 

Jack then sat up and looked at Gascoigne. The forage in 
the cart was so high round them that they could not see above 
it ; they rubbed their eyes, yawned, and looked at each other. 

“ Have you any faith in dreams,” said J ack to Gascoigne, 
because I had a very queer one last night.” 

“Well, so had I,” replied Gascoigne. “I dreamt that the 
cart rolled by itself into the sea, and went away with us right 
in the wind’s eye back to Malta ; and considering that it never 


j.86 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


was built for such service, she behaved uncommonly well. Now, 
what was your dream ?” 

“ Mine was, that we'woke up and found ourselves in the very 
town from which the speronare had sailed, and that they had 
found the fore part of the speronare among the rocks, had recog- 
nised her, and picked up one of our pistols. That they had laid 
hold of us, and had insisted that we had been thrown on shore in 
the boat, and asked us what had become of the crew — they 
were just seizing us, when I awoke.” 

“ Your dream is more likely to come true than mine, Easy ; 
but still I think we need not fear that. At the same time, we 
had better not remain here any longer ; and it occurs to me, 
that if we tore Qur clothes more, it would be advisable — we 
shall, in the first place, look more wretched ; and, in the next 
place, can replace them with the dress of* the country, and so 
travel without exciting suspicion. You know that I can speak 
Italian pretty well.” 

“ I have no objection to tear my clothes if you wish,” replied 
Jack ; “at the same time give me your pistol ; I will draw the 
charges and load them again. They must be wet.” 

Having reloaded the pistols and rent their garments, the two 
midshipmen stood up in the cart and looked about them. 

“Halloo ! — why how’s this, Gascoigne? last night we were 
close to the beach, and among houses, and now — where the 
devil are we ! You dreamt nearer the mark than I did, for the 
cart has certainly taken a cruise.” 

“We must have slept like midshipmen, then,” replied Gas- 
coigne : “surely it cannot have gone far.” 

“Here we are, surrounded by hills on every side, for at least 
a couple of miles. Surely some good genius has transported us 
into the interior, that we might escape from the relatives of the 
crew whom I dreamt about,” said Jack, looking at Gascoigne. 

As it afterwards was known to them, the speronare had 
sailed from the very sea-port in which they had arrived that 
night, and where they had got into the cart. The wreck of the 
speronare had been found, and had been recognised, and it was 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


187 


considered by the inhabitants that the padrone and his crew 
had perished in the gale. Had they found our two midshipmen 
and questioned them, it is not improbable that suspicion might 
have been excited, and the results have been such as our hero 
had conjured up in his dream. But, as we said before, there is 
a peculiar providence for midshipmen. 

On a minute survey, they found that they were in an open 
space which, apparently, had been used for thrashing and win- 
nowing maize, and that the cart was standing under a clump 
of trees in the shade. 

“ There ought to be a house hereabouts,” said Gascoigne ; 
“I should think that behind the trees we shall find one. Come, 
Jack, you are as hungry as I am, Til answer for it ; we must 
look out for a breakfast somewhere.” 

“ If they won’t give us something to eat, or sell it,” replied 
Jack, who was ravenous, clutching his pistol, “ I shall take it — 
I consider it no robbery. The fruits of the earth were made 
for us all, and it never was intended that one man should have 
a superfluity and another starve. The laws of equality ” 

“May appear very good arguments to a starving man, I 
grant, but still, w r on’t prevent his fellow-creatures from hanging 
him,” replied Gascoigne. “ Hone of your confounded nonsense, 
Jack ; no man starves with money in his pocket, and as long as 
you have that, leave those that have none to talk about equa- 
lity and the lights of man.” 

“ I should like to argue that point with you, Gascoigne.” 

“ Tell me, do you prefer sitting down here to argue, or to 
look out for some breakfast, Jack ?” 

“ Oh, the argument may be put off, but hunger cannot.” 

“ That’s very good philosophy, Jack, so let’s go on.” 

They went through the copse of wood, which was very thick, 
and soon discovered the wall of a large house on the other 
side. 

“All right,” said Jack ; “but still let us reconnoitre. It’s 
not a farm house ; it must belong to a person of some conse- 
quence — all the better — they will see that we are gentlemen* 


188 


MB. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


notwithstanding our tattered dress. I suppose we are to stick 
to the story of the sea-mews at Gozo.” 

“ Yes,” replied Gascoigne ; “I can think of nothing better. 
But the English are well received in this island ; we have troops 
at Palermo.” 

“ Have we ? I wish I was sitting down at the mess-table — 
but what’s that? a woman screaming? Yes, by heavens! — 
come along Ned.” And away dashed Jack towards the house, 
followed by Gascoigne. As they advanced the screams redou- 
bled ; they entered the porch, burst into the room from whence 
they proceeded, and found an elderly gentleman defending him- 
self against two young men, who were held back by an elderly 
and a young lady. Our hero and his comrade had both drawn 
their pistols, and just as they burst open the door, the old gen- 
tleman who defended himself against such odds had fallen down. 
The two others burst from the women, and were about to pierce 
him with their swords, when Jack seized one by the collar of 
his coat and held him fast, pointing the muzzle of the pistol to 
his ear : Gascoigne did the same to the other. It was a very 
dramatic tableau. The two women flew to the elderly gentle- 
man and raised him up ; the two assailants being held just as 
dogs hold pigs by the ear, trembling with fright, with the points 
of their rapiers dropped, looked at the midshipmen and the muz- 
zles of their pistols with equal dismay ; at the same time, the 
astonishment of the elderly gentleman and the women, at such 
an unexpected deliverance, was equally great. There was a 
silence for a few seconds. 

“Ned,” at last said Jack, “tell these chaps to drop their 
swords, or we lire.” 

Gascoigne gave the order in Italian, and it was complied 
with. The midshipmen then possessed themselves of the 
rapiers, and gave the young men their liberty. 

The elderly gentleman at last broke the silence. 

“ It would appear, signors, that there was an especial inter- 
ference of Providence, to prevent you from committing a foul 
and unjust murder. Who these are that have so opportunely 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


189 


come to my rescue, I know not, but thanking them as I do 
now, I think that you will yourselves, when you are calm, also 
thank them for having prevented you from committing an act 
which would have loaded you with remorse and embittered 
your future existence. Gentlemen, you are free to depart ; 
you, Don Silvio, have indeed disappointed me ; your gratitude 
should have rendered you incapable of such conduct ; as for 
you, Don Scipio, you have been misled ; but you both have, in 
one point, disgraced yourselves. Ten days back my sons were 
both here, — why did you not come then? If you sought 
revenge on me, you could not have inflicted it deeper than 
through my children, and at least you would not have acted 
the part of assassins in attacking an old man. Take your 
swords, gentlemen, and use them better henceforth. Against 
future attacks I shall be well prepared.” 

Gascoigne, who perfectly understood what was said, pre- 
sented the sword to the young gentleman from whom he had 
taken it — our hero did the same. The two young men returned 
them to their sheaths, and quitted the room without saying a 
word. 

“ Whoever you are, I owe to you and thank you for my life,” 
said the elderly gentleman, scanning the outward appearance of 
our two midshipmen. 

“We are,” replied Gascoigne, “officers in the' English navy, 
and gentlemen ; we were wrecked in our boat last night, and 
have wandered here in the dark, seeking for assistance and 
food, and some conveyance to Palermo, where we shall find 
friends, and the means of appearing like gentlemen.” 

“ Was your ship wrecked, gentlemen ?” inquired the Sicilian, 
“ and many lives lost ?” 

“No, our ship is at Malta ; we were in a boat on a party of 
pleasure, were caught by a gale, and driven on the coast. To 
satisfy you of the truth, observe that our pistols have the king’s 
mark, and that we are not paupers, we show you gold.” 

Gascoigne pulled out his doubloons — and Jack did the same, 
coolly observing, — 


190 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


“ I thought we were only to show silver, Ned !” 

“ It needed not that,” replied the gentleman ; “your conduct 
in this affair, your manners and address, fully convince me that 
you are what you represent — but were you common peasants, I 
am equally indebted to you for my life, and you may command 
me Tell me in what way I can be of service.” 

“ In giving us something to eat, for we have had nothing for 
many many hours. After that, we may, perhaps, trespass a 
little more upon your kind offices.” 

“ You must, of course, be surprised at what has passed, and 
curious to know the occasion,” said the gentleman ; “ you have a 
right to be informed of it, and shall be, as soon as you are more 
comfortable ; in the mean time, allow me to introduce myself 
as Don Rebiera de Silva.” 

“I wish,” said Jack, who, from his knowledge of Spanish, 
could understand the whole of the last part of the don’s speech, 
“ that he would introduce us to his breakfast.” 

“ So do I,” said Gascoigne ; “ but we must wait a little — ho 
ordered the ladies to prepare something instantly.” 

“ Your friend does not speak Italian,” said Don Rebiera. 

“No, Don Rebiera, he speaks French and Spanish .” 

“If he speaks Spanish, my daughter can converse with him , 
she has but shortly arrived from Spain. We are closely united 
with a noble house in that country.” 

Don Rebiera then led the way to another room, and in a 
short time there was a repast brought in, to which our midship- 
men did great justice. 

“ I will now,” said the don, “ relate to you, sir, for the infor- 
mation of yourself and friend, the causes which produced this 
scene of violence, which you so opportunely defeated. But 
first, as it must be very tedious to your friend, I will send for 
Donna Clara and my daughter Agnes to talk to him ; my wife 
understands a little Spanish, and my daughter, as I said before, 
has but just left the country, where, from circumstances, she 
remained some years.” 

As soon as Donna Clara and Donna Agnes made tlwir 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


191 


appearance and were introduced, Jack, who had not before 
paid attention to them, said to himself, “ I have seen a face like 
that girl’s before.” If so, he had never seen many like it, for it 
was the quintessence of brunette beauty, and her figure was 
equally perfect ; although, not having yet completed her 
fifteenth year, it required still a little more development. 

Donna Clara was extremely gracious, and as, perhaps, she 
was aware that her voice would drown that of her husband, she 
proposed to our hero to walk in the garden, and in a few 
minutes they took their seats in a pavilion at the end of it. 
The old lady did not talk much Spanish, but when at a loss for 
a word she put in an Italian one, and Jack understood her per- 
fectly well. She told him her sister had married a Spanish 
nobleman many years since, and that before the war broke out 
between the Spanish and the English, they had gone over with 
all their children to see her ; that when they wished to return, 
her daughter Agnes, then a child, was suffering under a linger- 
ing complaint, and it was thought advisable, as she was very 
weak, to leave her under the charge of her aunt, who had a 
little girl of nearly the same age ; that they were educated 
together at a convent, near Tarragona, and that she had only 
returned two months ago ; that 'she had a very narrow escape, 
as the ship in which her uncle, and aunt, and cousins, as well as 
herself, were on board, returning from Genoa, where her 
brother-in-law had been obliged to go to secure a succession to 
some property bequeathed to him, had been captured in the 
night by the English : but the officer, who was very polite, had 
allowed them to go away next day, and very handsomely per- 
mitted them to take all their effects. 

“ Oh, oh,” thought Jack, “ I thought I had seen her face 
before ; this, then, was one of the girls in the corner of the 
cabin — now, I’ll have some fun.” 

During the conversation with the mother, Donna Agnes had 
remained some paces behind, picking now and then a flower, 
and not attending to what passed. 

When our hero and her mother sat down in the pavilion, she 


192 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


joined them, when Jack addressed her with his usual polite- 
ness. 

“ I am almost ashamed to be sitting by you, Donna Agnes, 
in this ragged dress — but' the rocks of your coast have no 
respect for persons.” 

“We are under great obligations, signor, and do not regard 
such trifles.” 

“You are all kindness, signora,” replied Jack; “I little 
thought this morning of my good fortune, — I can tell the for- 
tunes of others, but not my own.” 

“You can tell fortunes !” replied the old lady. 

“ Yes, madam, I am famous for it- — shall I tell your daughter 
hers ?” 

Donna Agnes looked at our hero, and smiled. 

“ I perceive that the young lady does not believe me ; I must 
prove my art by telling her of what has already happened to 
her. The signora will then give me credit.” 

“ Certainly, if you do that,” replied Agnes. 

“ Oblige me by showing me the palm of your hand.” 

Agnes extended her little hand, and J ack felt so very polite, 
that he was nearly kissing it. However, he restrained himself, 
and examining the lines — 

“That you were educated in Spain — that you arrived here 
but two months ago — that you were captured and released by 
the English, your mother has already told me ; but to prove to 
you that I knew all that, I must now be more particular. You 
were in a ship mounting fourteen guns — was it not so ?” 

Donna Agnes nodded her head. 

“ I never told the signor that,” cried Donna Clara. 

“ She was taken by surprise in the night, and there was no 
fighting. The next morning the English burst open the cabin 
door ; your uncle and your cousin fired their pistols.” 

“ Holy Virgin !” cried Agnes with surprise. 

“ The English officer was a young man, not very good- 
•ooking.” 

“ There you are wrong, signor ; he was very handsome.” 


ME. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


193 


“ There is no accounting for taste, signora ; you were 
frightened out of your wits, and with your cousin you crouched 
down in the corner of the cabin. Let me examine that little 
line closer, — you had, — yes, it’s no mistake, you had very little 
clothes on.” 

Agnes tore away her hand and covered her face. 

“ £ vero, e vero ; Holy Jesus I how could you know 
that ?” 

Of a sudden Agnes looked at our hero, and after a minute 
appeared to recognise him. 

w Oh, mother, ? t is he ; — I recollect now, *t is he P 

“ Who, my child ?” replied Donna Clara, who had been 
struck dumb with J ack’s astonishing power of fortune-telling. 

“ The officer who captured us, and was so kind.” 

Jack burst out into a laughter, not to be controlled for 
some minutes, and then acknowledged that she had discovered 
him. 

“ At all events, Donna Agnes,” said he at last, “acknowledge 
that, ragged as I am, I have seen you in a much greater 
dishabille.” 

Agnes sprang up and took to her heels, that she might hide 
her confusion, and at the same time go to her father, and tell 
him who he had as his guest. 

Although Don Rebiera had not yet finished his narrative, 
this announcement of Agnes, who rail in breathless to communi- 
cate it, immediately brought all the parties together, and Jack 
received their thanks. 

“ I little thought,” said the Don, “ that I should have been 
so doubly indebted to you, sir. Command my services as you 
please, both of you. My sons are at Palermo, and I trust you 
will allow them the pleasure of your friendship when you are 
tired of remaining with us.” 

Jack made his politest bow, and then with a shrug, of his 
shoulders looked down upon his habiliments, which, to please 
Gascoigne, he had torn into ribands, as much as to say, We are 
not provided for a lengthened stay. 

9 


194 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY 


“ My brothers’ clothes will fit them, I think,” said Agnes to 
her father ; “ they have left plenty in their wardrobes.” 

“ If the signors will condescend to wear them, till they can 
replace their own.” 

Midshipmen are very condescending — they followed Don 
Rebiera, and condescended to put on clean shirts belonging to 
Don Philip and Don Martin ; also to put on their trousers— to 
select their best waistcoats and coats — in .short, they conde- 
scended to have a regular fit-out — and it so happened that the 
fit-out was not far from a regular fit. 

Having condescended, they then descended, and the intimacy 
between all parties became so great that it appeared as if they 
not only wore the young men’s clothes, but also stood in their 
shoes. Having thus made themselves presentable, Jack pre- 
sented his hand to both ladies, and led them into the garden, 
that Don Rebiera might finish his long story to Gascoigne 
without further interruption, and resuming their seats in the 
pavilion, he entertained the ladies with a history of his cruise in 
the ship after her capture. Agnes soon recovered from her 
reserve, and Jack had the forbearance not to allude again 
to the scene in the cabin, which was the only thing she 
dreaded. After dinner, when the family, according to custom, 
had retired for the siesta, Gascoigne and Jack, who had slept 
enough in the cart to last for a week, went out together in the 
garden. 

“Well, Ned,” said Jack, “ do you wish yourself on board the 
Harpy again ?” 

“ No,” replied Gascoigne, “ we have fallen on our feet at 
last, but still not without first being knocked about like peas in 
a rattle. What a lovely little creature that Agnes is ! How 
strange that you should fall in with her again 1 How odd that 
we should come here 1” 

“ My good fellow, we did not come here. Destiny brought 
us in a cart. She may take us to Tyburn in the same way.” 

“Yes, if you sport your philosophy as you did when we 
awoke this morning,” 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


195 


“ Nevertheless, I’ll be hanged if Fm not right. Suppose we 
argue the point ?” 

“Right or wrong, you will be hanged, Jack ; so instead 
of arguing the point, suppose I tell you what the Don made 
such a long story about.” 

“ With all my heart ; let us go to the pavilion.” 

Our hero and his friend took their seats, and Gascoigne 
then communicated the history of Don Rebiera, to which we 
shall dedicate the ensuing chapter. 


CHAPTER XX. 

A LONG STORY, WHICH THE READER MUST LISTEN TO, AS WELL AS 
OUR HERO. 

“I have already made you acquainted with my name, and 
I have only to add, that it is one of the most noble in Sicily, and 
that there are few families who possess such large estates. My 
father was a man who had no pleasure in the pursuits of most 
of the young men of his age ; he was of a weakly constitution, 
and was with difficulty reared to manhood. When his studies 
were completed, he retired to his country-seat, belonging 
to our family, which is about twenty miles from Palermo, 
and shutting himself up, devoted himself wholly to literary 
pursuits. 

“As he was an only son, his parents were naturally very 
anxious that he should marry ; the more so as his health 
did not promise him a very extended existence. Had he 
consulted his own inclinations he would have declined, but 
he felt that it was his duty to comply with their wishes ; but 
he did not trouble himself with the choice, leaving it wholly to 
them. They selected a young lady of high family, and certainly 
of most exquisite beauty. I only wish I could say more in her 
favour, for she was my mother ; but it is impossible to narrate 


196 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


the history without exposing her conduct. The marriage took 
place, and my father, having woke up as it were at the celebra- 
tion, again returned to his closet, to occupy himself in abstruse 
studies ; the results of which have been published, and have 
fully established his reputation as a man of superior talent and 
deep research. But, however much the public may appreciate 
the works of a man of genius, whether they be written to 
instruct or to amuse, certain it is, that a literary man requires, 
in his wife, either a mind congenial to his own, or that pride in 
her husband’s talents which induces her to sacrifice much of her 
own domestic enjoyment to the satisfaction of having his name 
extolled abroad. I mention this point as some extenuation of 
my mother’s conduct. She was neglected most certainly, 
but not neglected for frivolous amusements, or because another 
form had more captivated his fancy ; but, in his desire to 
instruct others, and I may add, his ambition for renown, he 
applied himself to his literary pursuits, became abstracted, 
answered without hearing, and left his wife to amuse herself in 
any way she might please. A literary husband is, without 
exception, although always at home, the least domestic husband 
in the world, and must try the best of tempers, not by unkind- 
ness, for my father was kind and indulgent to excess, but by 
that state of perfect abstraction and indifference which he 
showed to every thing except the favourite pursuit which 
absorbed him. My mother had but to speak, and every wish 
was granted — a refusal was unknown. You may say, what 
could she want more ; I reply, that any thing to a woman 
is preferable to indifference. The immediate consent to every 
wish took away, in her opinion, all merit in the grant ; the 
value of every thing is only relative, and in proportion to 
the difficulty of obtaining it. The immediate assent to every 
opinion was tantamount to insult ; it implied that he did not 
choose to argue with her. 

“It is true, that women like to have their own way ; but 
they like, at the same time, to have difficulties to surmount and 
to conquer ; otherwise, half the gratification is lost. Although 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


191 


tempests are to be deplored, still a certain degree of oscillation 
and motion are requisite to keep fresh and clear the lake 
of matrimony, the waters of which otherwise soon stagnate 
and become foul, and without some contrary currents of 
opinion between a married couple, such a stagnation must take 
place. 

“ A woman permitted always and invariably to have her own 
way without control, is much in the same situation as the child 
who insists upon a whole instead of half a holiday, and before 
the evening closes is tired of himself and every thing about him. 
In short, a little contradiction, like salt at dinner, seasons and 
appetises the repast ; but too much, like the condiment in ques- 
m tion, spoils the whole, and it becomes unpalatable in proportion 
to its excess. 

“ My mother was a vain woman in every sense of the word — 
vain of her birth and of her beauty, and accustomed to receive 
that homage to which she considered herself entitled. She had 
been spoiled in her infancy, and as she grew up had learnt 
nothing, because she was permitted to do as she pleased ; she 
was therefore frivolous, and could not appreciate what she 
could not comprehend. There never was a more ill-assorted 
union.” 

“ I have always thought that such must be the case,” replied 
Gascoigne, “in Catholic countries, where a young person is 
taken out of a convent and mated according to what her family 
or her wealth may consider as the most eligible connection.” 

“ On that subject there are many opinions, my friend,” re- 
plied Don Rebiera. “ It is true, that when a marriage of con- 
venience is arranged by the parents, the dispositions of the 
parties are made a secondary point ; but then, again, it must be 
remembered, that when a choice is left to the parties themselves, 
it is at an age at which there is little worldly consideration : 
and, led away, in the first place, by their passions, they form 
connections with those inferior in their station, which are attend- 
ed with eventual unhappiness ; or, in the other, allowing that 
they do choose in their own rank of life, they make quite as bad 


198 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


or often a worse choice than if their partners were selected for 
them.” 

“ I cannot understand that,” replied Gascoigne. 

“ The reason is, because there are no means, or if means, no 
wish, to study each other’s disposition. A young man is at- 
tracted by person, and he admires ; the young woman is flat- 
tered by the admiration, and is agreeable ; if she has any faults 
she is not likely to display them — not concealing them from 
hypocrisy, but because they are not called out. The young man 
falls in love, so does the young woman ; and when once in love, 
they can no longer see faults ; they marry, imagining that they 
have found perfection. In the blindness of love, each raises the 
other to a standard of perfection, which human nature can never 
attain, and both become equally annoyed on finding, by de- 
grees, that they were in error. The re-action takes place, and 
they then under-rate, as much as before they had over-rated, 
each other. Now, if two young people marry without this 
violence of passion, they do not expect to find each other per- 
fect, and perhaps have a better chance of happiness.” 

“ I don’t agree with you,” thought Gascoigne ; “but as you 
appear to be as fond of argument as my friend Jack, I shall 
make no reply, lest there be no end to the story.” 

Don Rebiera proceeded. 

“ My mother, finding that my father preferred his closet and 
his books to gaiety and dissipation, soon left him to himself, and 
amused herself after her own fashion, but not until I was born, 
which was ten months after their marriage. My father was 
confiding, and, pleased that my mother should be amused, he 
indulged her in every thing. Time flew on, and I had arrived 
at my fifteenth year, and came home from my studies, it being 
intended that I should enter the army, which you are aware is 
generally the only profession embraced in this country by the 
heirs of noble families. Of course, I knew little of what had 
passed at home, but still I had occasionally heard my mother 
spoken lightly of, when I was not supposed to be present, and I 
always heard my father’s name mentioned with compassion, as 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


199 


if an ill-used man, but I knew nothing more : still this was quite 
sufficient for a young man, whose blood boiled at the idea of 
any thing like a stigma being cast upon his family. I arrived 
at my father’s — I found him at his books ; I paid my respects 
to my mother, — I found her with her confessor. I disliked the 
man at first sight ; he was handsome, certainly : his forehead 
was high and white, his eyes large and fiery, and his figure com- 
manding ; but there was a dangerous, proud look about him 
which disgusted me, — nothing like humility or devotion. I might 
have admired him as an officer commanding a regiment of 
cavalry, but as a churchman he appeared to be most misplaced. 
She named me with kindness, but he appeared to treat me with 
disdain ; he spoke authoritatively to my mother, who appeared 
to yield implicitly, and I discovered that he was lord of the 
whole household. My mother, too, it was said, had given up 
gaieties and become devout. I soon perceived more than a 
common intelligence between them, and before I had been two 
months at home I had certain proofs of my father’s dishonour ; 
and, what was still more unfortunate for me, they were aware 
that such was the case. My first impulse was to acquaint my 
father ; but, on consideration, I thought it better to say nothing, 
provided I could persuade my mother to dismiss Father Ignatio. 
I took an opportunity when she was alone to express my indig- 
nation at her conduct, and to demand his immediate dismissal, 
as a condition of my not divulging her crime. She appeared 
frightened, and gave her consent ; but I soon found that her 
confessor had more power with her than I had, and he remained. 
I now resolved to acquaint my father, and I roused him from his 
studies that he might listen to his shame. I imagined that he would 
have acted calmly and discreetly ; but, on the contrary, his vio- 
lence was without bounds, and I had the greatest difficulty from 
preventing his rushing with his sword to sacrifice them both. At 
last he contented himself by turning Father Ignatio out of the 
house in the most ignominious manner, and desiring my mother to 
prepare for seclusion in a convent for the remainder of her days. 
But he fell their victim ; three days afterwards, as my mother 


200 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


was, by liis directions, about to be removed, be was seized with 
convulsions and died. I need hardly say, that he was carried 
off by poison ; this, however, could not be established till long 
afterwards. Before he died he seemed to be almost superna- 
turally prepared for an event which never came into my 
thoughts He sent for another confessor, who drew np his 
confession in writing at his own request, and afterwards inserted 
it in his will. My mother remained in the house, and Father 
Ignatio had the insolence to return. I ordered him away, and 
he resisted. He was turned out by the servants. I had an 
interview with my mother, who defied me, and told me that I 
should soon have a brother to share in the succession. I felt 
that, if so, it would be the illegitimate progeny of her adultery, 
and told her my opinion. She expressed her rage in the bitter- 
est curses, and I left her. Shortly afterwards she quitted the 
house and retired to another of our country-seats, where she 
lived with Father Ignatio as before. About four months after- 
wards, formal notice was sent to me of the birth of a brother ; 
but as, when my father’s will was opened, he there had inserted 
his confession, or the substance of it, in which he stated, that 
aware of my mother’s guilt, and supposing that consequences 
might ensue, he solemnly declared before God that he had for 
years lived apart, I cared little for this communication. I con- 
tented myself with replying, that as the child belonged to the 
church, it had better be dedicated to its service. 

“ I had, however, soon reason to acknowledge the vengeance 
of my mother and her paramour. One night I was attacked by 
bravos ; and had I not fortunately received assistance, I 
should have forfeited my life ; as it was I received a severe 
wound. 

“ Against attempts of that kind I took every precaution in 
future, but still every attempt was made to ruin my character, 
as well as to take my life. A young sister disappeared from a 
convent in my neighbourhood, and on the ground near the win- 
dow from which she descended, was found a hat recognised to 
be mine I was proceeded against, and notw T ithstanding the 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 201 

strongest interest, it was with difficulty that the affair was 
arranged, although I had incontestibly proved an alibi. 

“ A young man of rank was found murdered, with a stiletto, 
known to be mine, buried in his bosom, and it was with diffi 
culty that I could establish my innocence. 

“ Part of a banditti had been seized, and on being asked the 
name of their chief, when they received absolution, they con- 
fessed that I was the chief of the band. 

“ Every thing that could be attempted was put into practice ; 
and if I did not lose my life, at all events I was avoided by 
almost every body as a dangerous and doubtful character. 

“At last a nobleman of rank, the father of Don Scipio, 
whom you disarmed, was assassinated ; the bravos were taken, 
and they acknowledged that I was the person who hired them. 
I defended myself, but the king imposed upon me a heavy fine 
and banishment. I had just received the order, and was cry- 
ing out against the injustice, and lamenting my hard fate, as I 
sat down to dinner. Latterly, aware of what my enemies would 
attempt, I had been accustomed to live much alone. My faith- 
ful valet Pedro was my only attendant. I was eating my din- 
ner with little appetite, and had asked for some wine. Pedro 
went to the beaufet behind him, to give me what I required. 
Accidentally I lifted up my head, and there being a large pier- 
glass opposite to me, I saw the figure of my valet, and that he 
was pouring a powder in the flagon of wine which he was about 
to present to me. I recollected the hat being found at the 
nunnery, and also the stiletto in the body of the young man. 

“ Like lightning it occurred to me, that I had been fostering 
the viper who had assisted to destroy me. He brought me the 
flagon. I rose, locked the door, and drawing my sword, I ad- 
dressed him, — 

“ ‘ Yillain ! I know thee ; down on your knees, for your life 
is forfeited/ 

“ He turned pale, trembled, and sank upon his knees. 

‘“.Now, then/ continued I, ‘yon have but one chance — 
either drink off this flagon of wine, or I pass my sword through 

9 * 


202 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EAST. 


your body. He hesitated, and I put the point to his breast, 
— even pierced the flesh a quarter of an inch. 

“ * Drink/ cried I, 1 is it so very unjust an order, to tell you 
to drink old wine ? Drink/ continued I, ‘ or my sword does 
its duty/ 

“ He drank, and would then have quitted the room. ‘ Ho, 
no/ said I, ‘ you remain here, and the Vine must have its effect. 
If I have wronged you I will make amends to you — but I am 
suspicious/ 

“ In about a quarter of an hour, during which time I paced 
up and down the room, with my sword drawn, my servant fell 
down, and cried in mercy to l?t him have a priest. I sent for 
my own confessor, and he then acknowledged that he was an 
agent of my mother and Father Ignatio, and had been the 
means of making it appear that I was the committer of all the 
crimes and murders which had been perpetrated by them, with a 
view to my destruction. A strong emetic having been adminis- 
tered to him, he partially revived, and was taken to Palermo, 
where he gave his evidence before he expired. 

“ When this was made known the king revoked his sentence, 
apologised to me, and I found that once more I was visited and 
courted by every body. My mother was ordered to be shut up 
in a convent, where she died, I trust, in grace, and Father 
Ignatio fled to Italy, and I have been informed is since dead. 

“ Having thus rid myself of my principal enemies, I considered 
myself safe. I married the lady whom you have just seen, and 
before my eldest son was born, Don Silvio, for such was the 
name given to my asserted legitimate brother, came of age, and 
demanded his succession. Had he asked me for a proper sup- 
port as my uterine brother, I should not have refused ; but 
that the son of Friar Ignatio, who had often attempted my 
life, should, in case of my decease, succeed to the title and 
• estates, was not to be borne. A lawsuit was immediately com- 
menced, which lasted four or five years, during which Don Silvio 
married, and had a son, that young man whom you heard me 
address by the same name ; but after much litigation, it was 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


203 


decided that my father’s confessor and will had proved his ille- 
gitimacy, and the suit was in my favour. From that time to 
this, there has been a constant enmity. Don Silvio refused all 
my offers of assistance, and followed me with a pertinacity 
which often endangered my life. At last he fell by the hands 
of his own agents, who mistook him for me. Don Silvio died 
without leaving hny provision for his family ; his widow I pen- 
sioned, and his son I have had carefully brought up, and have 
indeed treated most liberally, but he appears to have imbibed 
the spirit of his father, and no kindness has been able to embue 
him with gratitude. 

“He had lately been placed by* me in the army, where he 
found out my two sons, and quarrelled with them both upon 
slight pretence ; but, in both instances, he was wounded and 
carried off the field. 

“ My two sons have been staying with me these last two 
months, and did not leave till yesterday. This morning Don 
Silvio, acompanied by Don Scipio, came to the house, and 
after accusing me of being the murderer of both their parents, 
drew their rapiers to assassinate me. My wife and child, hearing 
the noise, came down to my assistance — you know the rest.” 


CHAPTER XXI. 

IN WHICH OUR HERO IS BROUGHT UP ALL STANDING UNDER A PRESS 
OF SAIL. 

Our limits will not permit us to relate all that passed during 
our hero’s stay of a fortnight at Don Hebiera’s. He and Gas- 
coigne were treated as if they were his own sons, and the kind- 
ness of the female part of the family was equally remarkable. 
Agnes, naturally perhaps, showed a preference or partiality for 
Jack ; to which Gascoigne willingly submitted, as he felt that 
our hero had a prior and stronger claim, and during the time 


204 


mr. Midshipman easy 


that they remained, a feeling of attachment was created "be* 
tween Agnes and the philosopher, which, if not love, was at 
least something very near akin to it ; but the fact was, that 
they were both much too young to think of marriage ; and, 
although they walked and talked, and laughed, and played 
together, they were always at home in time for their dinner. 
Still, the young lady thought she preferred our hero, even to 
her brothers, and Jack thought that the young lady was the 
prettiest and kindest girl that he had ever met with. At the 
end of the fortnight, our two midshipmen took their leave, fur- 
nished with letters of recommendation to many of the first 
nobility in Palermo, and mounted on two fine mules with bell 
bridles. The old Donna kissed them both — the Don showered 
down his blessings of good wishes, and Donna Agnes’ lips 
trembled as she bade them adieu ; and, as soon as they were 
gone, she went up to her chamber and wept. Jack also was 
very grave, and his eyes moistened at the thoughts of leaving 
Agnes. Neither of them were aware, until the hour of part- 
ing, how much they had wound themselves together. 

The first quarter of an hour our two midshipmen followed 
their guide in silence. Jack wished to be left to his own 
thoughts, and Gascoigne perceived it. 

“Well, Easy,” said Gascoigne, at last, “if I had been in 
your place, constantly in company of, and loved by that charm- 
ing girl, I could never have torn myself away.” 

“Loved by her, Ned,” replied Jack, “what makes you say 
that ?” 

“ Because I am sure it was the case ; she lived but in your 
presence. Why, if you were out of the room, she never spoke 
a word, but sat there as melancholy as a sick monkey — the mo- 
ment you came in again, she beamed out as glorious as the sun, 
and w r as all life and spirit.” 

“ I thought people were alv r ays melancholy when they were 
in love,” replied Jack. 

“ When those that they love are out of their presence.” 

“ Well, then, I am out of her presence and I feel very mel- 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


205 


nncholy, so I suppose, by your argument, I am in love. Can 
a man be in love without knowing it ?” 

“ I really cannot say, Jack, I never was in love myself, but 
I ; ve seen many others spooney. My time will come, I suppose, 
by-and-bye. They say, that for every man made, there is a 
woman also made to fit him, if he could only find her. Now, it’s 
my opinion that you have found yours — Til lay my life she is 
crying at this moment.” 

“ Do you really think so, Ned ? let’s go back— poor little 
Agnes— let’s go back ; I feel I do love her, and I’ll tell 
her so.” 

“ Pooh, nonsense ! it’s too late now ; you should have 
told her that before, when you walked with her in the gar- 
den.” 

“ But I did not know it, Ned. However, as you say, it 
would be foolish to turn back, so I’ll write to her from 
Palermo.” 

Here an argument ensued upon love, which we shall not 
trouble the reader with, as it was not very profound, both sides 
knowing very little on the subject. It did, however, end with 
our hero being convinced that he was desperately in love, and 
he talked about giving up the service as soon as he arrived at 
Malta. It is astonishing what sacrifices midshipmen will make 
for the objects of their adoration. 

It was not until late in the evening that our adventurers 
arrived at Palermo. As soon as they were lodged at the hotel, 
Gascoigne sat down and wrote a letter in their joint names to 
Don Kebiera, returning him many thanks for his great kind- 
ness, informing him of their safe arrival, and trusting that they 
should soon meet again : and Jack took up his pen, and indited 
a letter in Spanish to Agnes, in which he swore that neither 
tide nor time, nor water, nor air, nor heaven, nor earth, nor the 
first-lieutenant, nor his father, nor absence, nor death itself, 
should prevent him from coming back and marrying her, the 
first convenient opportunity, begging her to refuse a thousand 
offers, as come back he would, although there was no saying 


206 


HR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


when. It was a perfect love-letter, that is to say, it was the 
essence of nonsence, but that made it perfect, for the greater 
the love, the greater the folly. 

These letters were consigned to the man who was sent as 
their guide, and also had to return with the mules. He was 
liberally rewarded ; and, as Jack told him to be very careful 
of his letter, the Italian naturally concluded that it was to be 
delivered clandestinely, and he delivered it accordingly, at a 
time when Agnes was walking in the garden thinking of our 
hero. Nothing was more opportune than the arriyal of the 
letter ; Agnes ran to the pavilion, read it over twenty times, 
kissed it twenty times, and hid it in her bosom ; sat for a few 
minutes in deep and placid thought, took the letter out of its 
receptacle, and read it over and over again. It was very bad 
Spanish and very absurd, but she thought it delightful, poetical, 
classical, sentimental, argumentative, convincing, incontroverti- 
ble, imaginative, and even grammatical, for if it was not good 
Spanish, there was no Spanish half so good. Alas ! Agnes, 
was, indeed, unsophisticated, to be in such ecstasies with a mid- 
shipman’s love-letter. Once more she hastened to her room to 
weep, but it was from excess of joy and delight. The reader 
may think Agnes silly, but he must take into consideration the 
climate, and that she was not yet fifteen. 

Our young gentlemen sent for a tailor, and each ordered a 
new suit of clothes ; they delivered their letters of recommenda- 
tion, and went to the banker to whom they were addressed by 
Don Rebiera. 

“ I shall draw for ten pounds, Jack,” said Gascoigne, “ on 
the strength of the shipwreck ; I shall tell the truth, all except 
that we forgot to ask for leave, which I shall leave out ; and I 
am sure the story will be worth ten pounds. What shall you 
draw for, Jack ?” 

“ I shall draw for two hundred pounds,” replied Jack, “ I 
mean to have a good cruise while I can.” 

“ But will your governor stand that, Easy ?” 

11 To be sure he will.” 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 207 

“ Then you’re right — he is a philosopher — I wish he’d teach 
mine, for he hates the sight of a bill.” 

“ Then don’t you draw, Ned — I have plenty for both. If 
every man had his equal share and rights in the world, you 
would be as able to draw as much as I ; and, as you cannot, 
upon the principles of equality, you shall have half.” 

“ I really shall become a convert to your philosophy, Jack ; 
it does not appear to be so nonsensical as I thought it. At all 
events, it has saved my old governor ten pounds, which he can 
ill afford, as a colonel on half-pay.” 

On their return to the inn, they found Don Philip and Don 
Martin, to whom Don Rebiera had written, who welcomed 
them with open arms. They were two very fine young men of 
eighteen and nineteen, who were finishing their education in 
the army. Jack asked them to dinner, and they and our hero 
soon became inseparable. They took him to all the theatres, 
the conversaziones of all the nobility, and, as Jack lost his 
money with good humour, and was a very handsome fellow, he 
was every where well received and was made much of : many 
ladies made love to him, but J ack was only very polite, because 
he thought more and more of Agnes every day. Three weeks 
passed away like lightning, and neither Jack nor Gascoigne 
thought of going back. At last, one fine day, H. M. frigate 
Aurora anchored in the bay, and Jack and Gascoigne, who 
were at a party at the Duke of Pentaro’s, met with the captain 
of the Aurora, who was also invited. The duchess introduced 
them to Captain Tartar, who, imagining them, from their being 
in plain clothes, to be young Englishmen of fortune on their 
travels, was very gracious and condescending. Jack was so 
pleased with his urbanity that he requested the pleasure of his 
company to dinner the next day : Captain Tartar accepted the 
invitation, and they parted, shaking hands, with many expres- 
sions of pleasure in having made his acquaintance. Jack’s 
party was rather large, and the dinner sumptuous. The Sicilian 
gentlemen did not drink much wine, but Captain Tartar liked 
his bottle, and although the rest of the company quitted the 


208 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


table to go to a ball given that evening by the Marquesa 
Novara, Jack was too polite not to sit it out with the captain ; 
Gascoigne closed his chair to Jack’s, who, he was afraid, 
being a little affected with the wine, would “ let the cat out of 
the bag.” 

The captain was amazingly entertaining. Jack told him how 
happy he should be to see him at Forest Hill, which property 
the captain discovered to contain six thousand acres of land, 
and also that J ack was an only son ; and Captain Tartar was 
quite respectful when he found that he was in such very excel- 
lent company. The captain of the frigate inquired of Jack 
what brought him out here, and Jack, whose prudence was 
departing, told him that he came in his majesty’s ship Harpy. 
Gascoigne gave Jack a nudge, but it was of no use, for as the 
wine got into Jack’s brain, so did his notions of equality. 

“ Oh ! Wilson gave you a passage ; he’s an old friend of 
mine.” 

“ So he is of ours,” replied Jack ; “ he’s a devilish good sort 
of a fellow, Wilson.” 

“ But where have you been since you came out ?” inquired 
Captain Tartar. 

“ In the Harpy,” replied Jack, “ to be sure, I belong to 
her.” 

“Yon belong to her ! in what capacity may I ask ?” inquired 
Captain Tartar, in a much less respectful and confidential 
tone. 

“ Midshipman,” replied Jack ; “ so is Mr. Gascoigne.” 

“ Umph I you are on leave then.” 

“ No, indeed,” replied Jack ; “ I’ll tell you how it is, my 
dear fellow.” 

“ Excuse me for one moment,” replied Captain Tartar, rising 
up ; “I must give some directions to my servant which I 
forgot.” 

Captain Tartar hailed his coxswain out of the window, gave 
orders just outside of the door, and then returned to the table. 
In the meantime, Gascoigne, who expected a breeze, had beer 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


209 


cautioning Jack, in a low tone, at intervals, when Captain Tar- 
tar’s back was turned : but it was useless ; the extra quantity 
of wine had got into Jack’s head, and he cared nothing for 
Gascoigne’s remonstrance. When the captain resumed his seat 
at the table, Jack gave him the true narrative of all that had 
passed, to which his guest paid the greatest attention. Jack 
wound up his confidence by saying, that in a week or so he 
should go back to Don R^biera and propose for Donna Agnes. 

“ Ah 1” exclaimed Captain Tartar, drawing his breath with 
astonishment, and compressing his lips. 

“ Tartar, the wine stands with you,” said Jack, “allow me 
to help you.” 

Captain Tartar threw himself back in his chair, and let all 
the air out of his chest with a sort of whistle, as if he could 
hardly contain himself. 

u Have you had wine enough ?” said Jack, very politely ; “ if 
so, we will go to the Marquesa’s.” 

The coxswain came to the door, touched his hat to the cap- 
tain, and looked significantly. 

“ And so, sir,” cried Captain Tartar, in a voice of thunder, 
rising from his chair, “you’re a d — d runaway midshipman, 
who, if you belonged to my ship, instead of marrying Donna 
Agnes, I would marry you to the gunner’s daughter, by G — d ! 
Two midshipmen sporting plain clothes in the best society in 
Palermo, and having the impudence to ask a post-captain to 
dine with them ! To ask me, and address me as Tartar , and my 
dear fellow ! you infernal young scamps !” continued Captain 
Tartar, now boiling with rage, and striking his fist on the table 
so as to set all the glasses waltzing. 

“ Allow me to observe, sir,” said Jack, who was completely 
sobered by the address, “ that we do not belong to your ship, 
and that we are in plain clothes.” 

“ In plain clothes — midshipmen in mufti — yes, you are so : a 
couple of young swindlers, without sixpence in your pochst, 
passing yourselves off as young men of fortune, and walking off 
through the window without paying your bill.” 


210 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


41 Do you mean to call me a swindler, sir ? 77 replied Jack. 

“ Yes, sir, you 77 

“ Then you lie , 77 exclaimed our hero, in a rage. “lama 
gentleman, sir — I am sorry I cannot pay you the same compli- 
ment . 77 

The astonishment and rage of Captain Tartar took away his 
breath. He tried to speak, but could not — he gasped and 
gasped, and then sat or almost fell down in his chair — at last 
he recovered himself. 

“ Mathews — Mathews l 77 

“ Sir , 77 replied the coxswain, who had remained at the door. 

“ The sergeant of marines . 77 

“ Here he is, sir . 77 

The sergeant entered, and raised the back of his hand to his 
hat. 

“ Bring your marines in — take charge of these two. Directly 
you are on board, put them both legs in irons . 77 

The marines with their bayonets walked in and took posses- 
sion of our hero and Gascoigne. 

“ Perhaps, sir , 77 replied Jack, who was now cool again, “ you 
will permit us to pay our bill before we go on board. We are 
no swindlers, and it is rather a heavy one — or, as you have 
taken possession of our persons, you will, perhaps, do us the 
favour to discharge it yourself f and Jack threw on the table 
a heavy purse of dollars. “ I have only to observe, Captain 
Tartar, that I wish to be very liberal to the waiters . 77 

“ Sergeant, let them pay their bill , 77 said Captain Tartar, in 
a more subdued tone — taking his hat and sword, and walking 
out of the room. 

“ By heavens, Easy, what have you done ? — you will be tried 
by a court-martial, and turned out of the service . 77 

“ I hope so , 77 replied Jack ; “ I was a fool to come into it. 
But he called me a swindler, and I would give the same answer 
to-morrow 

“ If you are ready, gentlemen , 77 said the sergeant, who had 
been long enough with Captain Tartar to be aware that to 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


211 


be punished by him was no proof of fault having been com- 
mitted. 

“ I will go and pack up our things. Easy, while you pay the 
bill,” said Gascoigne. “Marine, you had better come with 
me.” 

“ In less than half-an-hour, our hero and his comrade, instead 
of finding themselves at the Marquesas ball, found themselves 
very comfortably in irons under the half deck of H. M. frigate 
Aurora. 

We shall leave them, and return to Captain Tartar, who 
had proceeded to the ball, to which he had been invited. On 
his entering he was accosted by Don Martin and Don Philip, 
who inquired what had become of our hero and his friend. 
Captain Tartar, who was in no very good humour, replied 
briskly, “ that they were on board his ship in irons.” 

“ In irons ! for what ?” exclaimed Don Philip. 

“ Because, sir, they are a couple of young scamps who have 
introduced themselves into the best company, passing them- 
selves off as people of consequence, when they are only a couple 
of midshipmen who have run away from their ship.” 

Now the Bebieras knew very well that Jack and his friend 
were midshipmen ; but this did not appear to them any reason 
why they should not be considered as gentlemen, and treated 
accordingly. 

“ Do you mean to say, signor,” said Don Philip, “ that you 
have accepted their hospitality, laughed, talked, walked arm- 
in-arm with them, pledged them in wine, as we have seen 
you this evening, and after they have confided in you that you 
have put them in irons ?” 

“Yes, sir, I do,” replied Captain Tartar. 

“ Then, by Heaven, you have my defiance, and you are no 
gentleman 1” replied Don Philip, the elder. 

“ And I repeat my brother's words, sir,” cried Don Martin. 

The two brothers felt so much attachment for our hero, who 
had twice rendered such signal service to them family, that 
their anger was without bounds. 


212 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


In every other service but the English navy, there is not 
that power of grossly insulting and then sheltering yourself 
under your rank ; nor is it necessary for the discipline of any 
service. To these young officers, if the power did exist, the 
use of such power under such circumstances appeared monstrous, 
and they were determined, at all events, to show to Captain 
Tartar, that in society, at least, it could be resented. They 
collected their friends, told them what had passed, and begged 
them to circulate it through the room. This was soon done, 
and Captain Tartar found himself avoided. He went up to 
the Marquesa and spoke to her — she turned her head the other 
way. He addressed a count he had been conversing with the 
night before — he turned short round upon his heel, while Don 
Philip and Don Martin walked up and down talking, so that 
he might hear what they said, and looking at him with eyes 
flashing with indignation. Captain Tartar left the ball-room 
and returned to the inn, more indignant than ever. When he 
rose the next morning he was informed that a gentleman 
wished to speak with him ; he sent up his card as Don Ignatio 
Yerez, colonel commanding the fourth regiment of infantry. 
On being admitted, he informed Captain Tartar that Don 
Philip de Rebiera wished to have the pleasure of crossing 
swords with him, and requested to know when it would be con- 
venient for Captain Tartar to meet him. 

It was not in Captain Tartar’s nature to refuse a challenge ; 
his courage was unquestionable, but he felt indignant that a 
midshipman should be the cause of his getting into such a scrape. 
He accepted the challenge, but having no knowledge of the 
small-sword, refused to fight unless with pistols. To this the 
colonel raised no objections, and Captain Tartar dispatched his 
coxswain with a note to his second-lieutenant, for he was not 
on good terms with his first. The meeting took place — at the 
first fire the ball of Don Philip passed through Captain Tartar’s 
brain, and he instantly fell dead. The second-lieutenant has- 
tened on board to report the fatal result of the meeting, and 
shortly after. Don Philip and his brother, with many of their 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


213 


friends, went off in the governor’s barge to condole with our 
hero. 

The. first-lieutenant, now captain pro tempore , received them 
graciously, and listened to their remonstrances relative to our 
hero and Gascoigne. 

“ I have never been informed by the captain of the grounds 
of complaint against the young gentlemen,” replied he, “ and 
have therefore no charge to prefer against them. I shall 
therefore order them to be liberated. But, as I learn that they 
are officers belonging to one of his Majesty’s ships lying at 
Malta, I feel it my duty, as I sail immediately, to take them 
there and send them on board of their own ship.” 

J ack and Gascoigne were then taken out of irons and per- 
mitted to see Don Philip, who informed them that he had 
revenged the insult, but Jack and Gascoigne did not wish to 
go on shore again after what had passed. After an hour’s con- 
versation, and assurances of continued friendship, Don Philip, 
his brother, and their friends, took leave of our two midshipmen, 
and rowed on shore. 

And now w T e must be serious. 

We do not write these novels merely to amuse, — we have 
always had it in our view to instruct, and it must not be sup- 
posed that we have no other end in view than to make the 
reader laugh. If we were to write an elaborate work, telling 
truths, and plain truths, confining ourselves only to point out 
errors and to demand reform, it would not be read ; we have 
therefore selected this light and trifling species of writing, 
as it is by many denominated, as a channel through which we 
may convey wholesome advice in a palatable shape. If we 
would point out an error, we draw a character, and although 
that character appears to weave naturally into the tale of 
fiction, it becomes as much a beacon, as it is a vehicle of amuse- 
ment. We consider this to be the true art of novel writing, 
and that crime and folly and error can be a3 severely lashed, 
as virtue and morality can be upheld, by a series of amusing 
causes and effects, that entice the reader to take a medicine, 


214 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


which, although rendered agreeable to the palate, still pro* 
duces the same internal benefit as if it had been presented to 
him in its crude state, in which it would either be refused or 
nauseated. 

In our naval novels, we have often pointed out the errors 
which have existed, and still do exist, in a service which is an 
honour to its country ; for what institution is there on earth 
that is perfect, or into which, if it once was perfect, abuses will 
not creep ? Unfortunately, others have "written to decry the 
service, and many have raised up their voices against oui 
writings, because they felt that, in exposing error, we were 
exposing them. But to this we have been indifferent ; we felt 
that we were doing good, and we have continued. To prove 
that we are correct in asserting that we have done good, we 
will, out of several, state one single case. 

In “ The King’s Own,” a captain, when requested to punish 
a man instanter for a fault committed, replies that he never has 
and never will punish a man until twenty-four hours after the 
offence, that he may not be induced by the anger of the mo- 
ment to award a severer punishment than in his cooler moments 
he might think commensurate — and that he wished that the 
Admiralty would give out an order to that effect. 

Some time after the publication of that work, the order was 
given by the Admiralty, forbidding the punishment until a cer- 
tain time had elapsed after the offence ; and we had the plea- 
sure of knowing from the first lord of the Admiralty of the 
time, that it was in consequence of the suggestion in the novel. 

If our writings had effected nothing else, we might still lay 
down our pen with pride and satisfaction : but they have done 
more, much more, and while they have amused the reader, they 
have improved the service ; they have held up in their charac- 
ters a mirror,' in which those who have been in error may see 
their own deformity, and many hints which have been given, 
have afterwards returned to the thoughts of those who have 
had influence, have been considered as their own ideas, and 
have been acted upon. The conduct of Captain Tartar may be 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


215 


considered as a libel on the service — is it not ? The fault of 
Captain Tartar was not in sending them on board, or even put- 
ting them in irons as deserters, although, under the circum. 
stances, he might have shown more delicacy. The fault was in 
stigmatising a young man as a swindler, and the punishment 
awarded to the error is intended to point out the moral, that 
such an abuse of power should be severely visited. The great- 
est error now in our service, is the disregard shown to the feel- 
ings of the junior officers in the language of their superiors : 
that an improvement has taken place I grant, but that it still 
exists, to a degree injurious to the service, I know too well. 
The articles of war, as our hero was informed by his captain, 
were equally binding on officers and crew ; but what a dead let- 
ter do they become if officers are permitted to break them with 
impunity ! The captain of a ship will turn the hands up to 
punishment, read the article of war for the transgressing of 
which the punishment is inflicted, and to show at that time 
their high respect for the articles of war, the captain and every 
officer take off their hats. The moment the hands are piped 
down, the second article of war, which forbids all swearing, &c., 
in derogation of God’s honour, is immediately disregarded. We 
are not strait-laced, — we care little about an oath as a mere 
expletive; we refer now to swearing at others, to insulting their 
feelings grossly by coarse and intemperate language. We 

would never interfere with a man for d g his own eyes, but 

we deny the right of his d g those of another. 

The rank of a master in the service is above that of a mid- 
shipman, but still the midshipman is a gentleman by birth, and 
the master, generally speaking, is not. Even at this moment, 
in the service, if the master were to d — n the eyes of a mid- 
shipman, and tell him that he was a liar, would there be any 
redress, or if so, would it be commensurate to the insult ? If a 
midshipman were to request a court-martial, would it be 
granted ? — certainly not : and yet this is a point of more 
importance than may be conceived. Our service has been 
wonderfully improved since the peace, and those who are now 


216 


ME. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


permitted to enter it must be gentlemen. We know that even 
now there are many who cry out against this as dangerous, and 
injurious to the service ; as if education spoilt an officer, and 
the scion of an illustrious house would not be more careful to 
uphold an escutcheon without blemish for centuries, than one 
who has little more than brute courage ; but those who argue 
thus are the very people who are injurious to the service, for 
they can have no other reason, except that they wish that the 
juniors may be tyrannised over with impunity. 

Be it remembered that these are not the observations of a 
junior officer, smarting under insult — they are the result of 
deep and calm reflection. We have arrived to that grade, 
that, although we have the power to inflict, we are too high to 
receive insult, but we have not forgotten how our young blood 
has boiled when wanton, reckless, and cruel torture has been 
heaped upon our feelings, merely because, as a junior officer, 
we were not in a position to retaliate, or even to reply. And 
another evil is, that this great error is disseminated. In observ- 
ing on it, in one of our works, called “ Peter Simple,” we have 
put the following true observation in the mouth of O’Brien. 
Peter observes, in his simple, right-minded way, — 

“ I should think, O’Brien, that the very circumstance of 
having had your feelings so often wounded by such language 
when you were a junior officer, would make you doubly careful 
not to use it towards others, when you had advanced in the 
service ?” 

“Peter, that’s just the first feeling, which wears away after 
a time, till at last, your own sense of indignation becomes 
blunted, and becomes indifferent to it ; you forget, also, that 
you wound the feelings of others, and carry the habit with you, 
to the great injury and disgrace of the service.” 

Let it not be supposed that in making these remarks we 
want to cause litigation, or insubordination. On the contrary, 
we assert that this error is the cause, and eventually will be 
much more the cause, of insubordination ; for as the junior 
officers who enter the service are improved, so will they resist 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


217 


it. The complaint here is more against the officers, than the 
captains, whose power has been perhaps already too much cur- 
tailed by late regulations : that power must remain, for 
although there may be some few who are so perverted as to 
make those whom they command uncomfortable, in justice to 
the service we are proud to assert, that the majority acknow- 
ledge, by their conduct, that the greatest charm attached to 
power is to be able to make so many people happy. 


CHAPTER XXII. 

OUR HERO IS SICK WITH THE SERVICE, BUT RECOVERS WITH PROPER 

MEDICINE. AN ARGUMENT, ENDING, AS MOST DO, IN A BLOW UP. 

MESTY LECTURES UPON CRANIOLOGY. 

The day after the funeral, H. M. ship Aurora sailed for Malta, 
and on her arrival the acting captain sent our two midshipmen 
on board the Harpy without any remark, except “victualled 
the day discharged,” as they had been borne on the ship’s books 
as supernumeraries. 

Mr. James, who was acting in the Aurora, was anxious to 
join the admiral at Toulon, and intended to sail the next day. 
He met Captain Wilson at the governor’s table, and stated that 
Jack and Gascoigne had been put in irons by order of Captain 
Tartar ; his suspicions, and the report, that the duel had in 
consequence taken place ; but Gascoigne and Jack had both 
agreed that they would not communicate the events of their 
cruise to anybody on board of the Aurora; and therefore 
nothing else was known, except that they must have made 
powerful friends somehow or another; and there appeared in 
the conduct of Captain Tartar, as well as in the whole transac- 
tion, somewhat of a mystery. 

“I should like to know what happened to my friend Jack, 
who fought the duel,” said the governor, who had laughed at 

10 


218 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EAST. 


it till he held his sides ; “ Wilson, do bring him here to-morrow 
morning, and let us have his story.” 

“ I am afraid of encouraging him, Sir Thomas — he is much 
too wild already. I told you of his first cruize. He has noth- 
ing but adventures, and they all end too favourably.” 

“ Well, but you can send for him here and blow him up just 
as well as in your own cabin, and then we will have the truth 
out of him.” 

“That you certainly will,” replied Captain Wilson, “for he 
tells it plainly enough.” 

“ Well, to oblige me, send for him — I don’t see he was much 
to blame in absconding, as it appears he thought he would be 
hung — I want to see the lad.” 

“ Well, governor, if you wish it,” replied Captain Wilson, 
who wrote a note to Mr. Sawbridge, requesting he would send 
Mr. Easy to him at the governor’s house at ten o’clock in the 
morning. 

Jack made his appearance in his uniform — he did not much 
care for what was said to him, as he was resolved to leave the 
service. He had been put in irons, and the iron had entered 
into his soul. 

Mr. Sawbridge had gone on shore about an hour before Jack 
had been sent on board, and he had remained on shore all the 
night. He did not therefore see Jack but for a few minutes, 
and thinking it his duty to say nothing to him at first, or to 
express his displeasure, he merely observed to him that the 
captain would speak to him as soon as he came on board. As 
Gascoigne and our hero did not know how far it might be safe, 
even at Malta, to acknowledge to what occurred on board the 
-'peronare, which might get wind, they did not even tell their 
messmates, resolving only to confide it to the captain. 

When Jack was ushered into the presence of the captain, he 
found him sitting with the governor, and the breakfast on the 
table ready for them. Jack walked in with courage, but 
respectfully. He was fond of Captain Wilson, and wished to 
show him respect. Captain Wilson addressed him, pointed out 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


219 


that he had committed a great error in fighting a duel, a 
greater error in demeaning himself by fighting the purser’s 
steward, and still greater in running away from his ship. Jack 
looked respectfully to Captain Wilson, acknowledged that he 
had done wrong, and promised to be more careful another time, 
if Captain Wilson would look over it. 

“ Captain Wilson, allow me to plead for the young gentle- 
man,” said the governor ; “I am convinced that it has only 
been an error in judgment.” 

“Well, Mr. Easy, as you express your contrition, and the 
governor interferes in your behalf, I shall take no more notice 
of this ; but recollect, Mr. Easy, that you have occasioned me 
a great deal of anxiety by your mad pranks, and I trust 
another time you will remember that I am too anxious for your 
welfare not to be uncomfortable when you run such risks. You 
may now go on board to your duty, and tell Mr. Gascoigne to 
do the same ; and pray let us hear of no more duels or running 
away.” 

Jack, whose heart softened at this kind of treatment, did not 
venture to speak ; he made his bow, and was about to quit the 
room, when the governor said, — 

“ Mr. Easy, you have not breakfasted.” 

“I have, sir,” replied Jack, “before I came on shore.” 

“ But a midshipman can always eat two breakfasts, particu- 
larly when his own comes first — so sit down and breakfast with 
us — it’s all over now.” 

“Even if it was not,” replied Captain Wilson, laughing, “ I 
doubt whether it would spoil Mr. Easy’s breakfast ; come, Mr. 
Easy, sit down.” 

Jack bowed, and took his chair, and proved that his lecture 
had not taken away his appetite. When breakfast was over 
Captain Wilson observed, — 

“ Mr. Easy, you have generally a few adventures to speak of 
when you return ; will you tell the governor and me what has 
taken place since you left us.” 

“Certainly, sir,” replied Jack; “but I venture to request 


220 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EAST. 


that it may be under the promise of secrecy, for it r s rather 
important to me and Gascoigne.” 

“Yes, if secrecy is really necessary, my boy ; but Pm the 
best judge of that,” replied the governor. 

Jack then entered into a detail of his adventures, which we 
have already described, much to the astonishment of the gov- 
ernor and his captain, and concluded his narration by stating 
that he wanted to leave the service ; he hoped that Captain 
Wilson would discharge him and send him home. 

“ Pooh, nonsense !’ ; said the governor, “ you sha’n’t leave the 
Mediterranean while I am here. No, no ; you must have more 
adventures, and come back and tell them to me. And recol- 
lect, my lad, that whenever you come to Malta, there is a bed 
at the governor’s house, and a seat at his table, always ready 
for you.” 

“ You are very kind, Sir Thomas,” replied Jack, “ but ” 

“No buts at all, sir — you sha’n’t leave the service ; besides, 
recollect that I can ask for leave of absence for you to go and 
see Donna Agnes — ay, and send you there too.” 

Captain Wilson also remonstrated with our hero, and he 
gave up the point. It was harsh treatment which made him 
form the resolution, it was kindness which overcame it. 

“With your permission, Captain Wilson, Mr. Easy shall 
dine with us to-day, and bring Gascoigne with him ; you shall 
first scold him, and I’ll console him with a good dinner — and, 
boy, don’t be afraid to tell your story every where : sit down 
and tell it at Nix Mangare stairs, if you please, — I’m governor, 
here.” 

J ack made his obeisance, and departed. 

“ The lad must be treated kindly, Captain Wilson,” said the 
governor ; “ he would be a loss to the service. Good heavens, 
what adventures ! and how honestly he tells every thing I 
shall ask him to stay with me for the time you are here, if you 
will allow me : I want to make friends with him ; he must not 
leave the service.” 

Captain Wilson, who felt that kindness and attention would 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY 


221 


be more effectual with our hero than any other measures, gave 
his consent to the governor's proposition. So Jack ate at the 
governor's table, and took lessons in Spanish and Italian until 
the Harpy had been refitted, after heaving down. Before she 
was ready a vessel arrived from the fleet, directing Captain 
Wilson to repair to Mahon, and send a transport, lying there, 
to procure live bullocks for the fleet. Jack did not join his 
ship very willingly, but he had promised the governor to remain 
in the service, and he went on board the evening before she 
sailed. He had been living so well that he had, at first, a hor- 
ror of midshipman's fare, but a good appetite seasons every 
thing, and Jack soon complained that there was not enough. 
He was delighted to see Jolliffe and Mesty after so long an 
absence ; he laughed at the boatswain's cheeks, inquired after 
the purser’s steward’s shot-holes, shook hands with Gascoigne 
and his other messmates, gave Vigors a thrashing, and then sat 
down to supper. 

“ Ah, Massa Easy, why you take a cruise without me ?” 
said Mesty ; “ dat very shabby — by de power, but I wish I was 
there ; you ab too much danger, Massa Easy, without Mesty 
any how.” 

The next day the Harpy sailed, and Jack went to his duty. 
Mr. Asper borrowed ten pounds, and our hero kept as much 
watch as he pleased, which, as watching did not please him, 
was very little. Mr. Sawbridge had long conversations with 
our hero, pointing out to him the necessity of discipline and 
obedience in the service, and that there was no such thing as 
equality, and that the rights of man secured to every one the 
property which he held in possession. “According to your 
ideas, Mr. Easy, a man has no more right to his wife than any 
thing else, and any other man may claim her.” Jack thought 
of Agnes, and he made matrimony an exception, as he continued 
to argue the point ; but although he argued, still his philoso- 
phy was almost upset at the idea of any one disputing with 
him the rights of man, with respect to Agnes. 

The Harpy made the African coast, the wind continued con- 


222 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


trary, and they were baffled for many days; at last they espied a 
brig under the land, about sixteen miles off ; her rig and ap- 
pearance made Captain Wilson suspect that she was a priva- 
teer of some description or another, but it was calm, and they 
could not approach her. Nevertheless, Captain Wilson thought 
it his duty to examine her; so at ten o’clock at night the boats 
were hoisted out: as this was merely intended for a reconnoitre, 
for there was no saying what she might be, Mr. Sawbridge did 
not go. Mr. Asper was in the sick list, so Mr. Smallsole, the 
master, had the command of the expedition. Jack asked Mr. 
Sawbridge to let him have charge of one of the boats. Mr. 
Jolliffe and Mr. Vigors went in the pinnace with the master. 
The gunner had the charge of one cutter, and our hero had the 
command of the other. Jack although not much more than 
seventeen, was very strong and tall for his age ; indeed, he was 
a man grown, and shaved twice a week. His only object in 
going was to have a yarn for the governor when he returned 
to Malta. Mesty went with him, and as the boat shoved off, 
Gascoigne slipped in, telling Jack that he was come to take 
care of him, for which considerate kindness Jack expressed his 
warmest thanks. The orders to the master were very explicit; 
he was to reconnoitre the vessel, and if she proved heavily 
armed not to attack, for she was embayed, and could not es- 
cape the Harpy as soon as there was wind. If not armed he 
was to board her, but he was to do nothing till the morning: 
the reason for sending the boats away so soon was, that the 
men might not suffer from the heat of the sun during the day 
' time, which was excessive, and had already put many men on 
the sick list. The boats were to pull to the bottom of the bay, 
not to go so near as to be discovered, and then drop their grap- 
nels till daylight. The orders were given to Mr. Smallsole in 
presence of the other officers who were appointed to the boats, 
that there might be no mistake, and the boats then shoved off. 
After a three hours’ pull, they arrived to where the brig lay 
becalmed, and as they saw no lights moving on board, they 
supposed they were not seen. They dropped their grapnels 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY 


223 


in about seven fathoms water, and waited for daylight. When 
Jack heard Captain Wilson’s orders that they were to lie at 
anchor till daylight, he had sent down Mesty for fishing-lines, 
as fresh fish is always agreeable in a midshipman’s berth: he 
and Gascoigne amused themselves this way, and as they pulled 
up the fish they entered into an argument, and Mr. Smallsole 
ordered them to be silent. The point which they discussed 
was relative to boat service ; Gascoigne insisted that the boats 
should all board at once — while our hero took it into his head 
that it was better they should come up one after another; a 
novel idea, but Jack’s ideas on most points were singular. 

“ If you throw your whole force upon the decks at once, you 
overpower them,” observed Gascoigne; “if you do not, you are 
beaten in detail.” 

“Yery true,” replied Jack, “supposing that you have an 
overpowering force, or they are not prepared; but recollect, 
that if they are the case is altered; for instance, as to fire- 
arms — they fire theirs at the first boat, and they have not time 
to reload, when the second comes up with its fire reserved; 
every fresh boat arriving adds to the courage of those who 
have boarded, and to the alarm of those who defend; the men 
come on fresh and fresh. Depend upon it, Gascoigne, there is 
nothing like a corps de reserve ” 

“ Will you keep silence in your boat, Mr. Easy, or will you 
not ?” cried the master; “ you’re a disgrace to the service, sir.” 

“ Thank ye, sir,” replied Jack in a low tone. •“ I’ve another 
bite, Ned.” 

Jack and his comrade continued to fish in silence till the day 
broke. The mist rolled off the stagnant water, and discovered 
the brig, who, as soon as she perceived the boats, threw out 
the French tricolor and fired a gun of defiance. 

Mr. Smallsole was undecided; the gun fired was not a heavy 
one, and so Mr. Jolliffe remarked; the men, as usual, anxious 
for the attack, asserted the same, and Mr. Smallsole, afraid of 
retreating from the enemy, and being afterwards despised by 
the ship’s company, ordered the boats to weigh their giapnels. 


224 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


“ Stop a moment, my lads,” said Jack to liis men, “ I’ve got 
a bite.” The men laughed at Jack’s taking it so easy; but he 
was their pet. and they did stop for him to pull up his fish, in- 
tending to pull up to the other boats and recover their loss of 
a few seconds. 

“ I’ve hooked him now,” said Jack; “ you may up with the 
grapnel, while I up with the fish.” But this delay gave the 
other boats a start of a dozen strokes of their oars, which was 
a distance not easy to be regained. 

“ They will be aboard before us, sir,” said the coxswain. 

“Never mind that/’ said Jack; “ some one must be last.” 

“ But not the boat I am in,” replied Gascoigne, “ if I could 
help it.” 

“ I tell you,” replied Jack, '“ we shall be the corps de reserve, 
and have the honor of turning the scale in our favour.” 

“ Give way, my lads,” cried Gascoigne, perceiving the other 
boats still kept their distance ahead of them, which was about 
a cable’s length. 

“ Gascoigne, I command the boat,” said Jack, “ and I do 
not wish my men to board without any breath in their bodies — 
that’s a very unwise plan. A steady pull, my lads, and not too 
much exertion.” 

“ By heavens, they’ll take the vessel before we get along- 
side.” 

“ Even if they should, I am right, am I not, Mesty ?” 

“ Yes, Massa Easy, you very right — suppose they take the 
vessel without you, they no want you — suppose they want you, 
you come ” And the negro, who had thrown his jacket off, 
bared his arm, as if he intended mischief. 

The first cutter, commanded by the gunner, now gained upon 
the launch, and was three boat’s-lengths ahead of her when she 
came alongside. The brig poured in her broadside— it was 
well directed, and down went the boat 

“ Cutter’s sunk,” exclaimed Gascoigne, “by heavens ! Give 
way, my men.” 

“Now, don’t you observe, that had we all three been pulling 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


225 


up together, the broadside would have sunk us all ?" said Jack, 
very composedly. 

“ There's board in the launch — give way, my men, give way,” 
said Gascoigne, stamping with impatience. 

The reception was evidently warm; by the time that the 
launch had poured in her men, the second cutter was close 
under the brig's quarter — two more strokes and she was along- 
side ; when of a sudden, a tremendous explosion took place on 
the deck of the vessel, and bodies and fragments were hurled 
up in the air. So tremendous was the explosion, that the men 
of the second cutter, as if transfixed, simultaneously stopped 
pulling, their eyes directed to the volumes of smoke which 
poured through the ports, and hid the whole of the masts and 
rigging of the vessel. 

“Now's your time, my lads, give way and alongside,” cried 
our hero. 

The men, reminded by his voice, obeyed; but the impetus al- 
ready given to the boat was sufficient. Before they could drop 
their oars in the water they grazed against the vessel's sides, 
and following Jack, were in a few seconds on the quarter-deck 
of the vessel. A dreadful sight presented itself — the whole 
deck was black, and corpses lay strewed, their clothes on them 
still burning, and among the bodies lay fragments of what 
once were men. 

The capstern was unshipped and turned over on its side — 
the binnacles were in remnants, and many of the ropes ignited. 
There was not one person left on deck to oppose them. 

As they afterwards learnt from some of the men who had 
saved their lives by remaining below, the French captain had 
seen the boats before they anchored, and had made every pre- 
paration; he had filled a large ammunition chest with cartridges 
for the guns, that they might not have to hand them up. The 
conflict between the men of the pinnace and the crew of the 
vessel was carried on near the capstern; and a pistol fired had 
accidentally communicated with the powder, which blew up in 
the very centre of the dense and desperate struggle. 

10 * 


226 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


The first object was to draw water and extinguish the flames 
which were spreading over the vessel; as soon as that was ac- 
complished, our hero went aft to the taffrail, and looked for 
the cutter which had been sunk. “ Gascoigne, jump into the 
boat with four men — I see the cutter floats a quarter of a mile 
astern: there may be some one alive yet. I think now I see a 
head or two.” 

Gascoigne hastened away, and soon returned with three of 
the cutter’s men ; the rest had sunk, probably killed or 
wounded by the discharge of the broadside. 

“ Thank God, there’s three saved !” said Jack, “for we have 
lost too many. We must now see if any of these poor fellows 
are yet alive, and clear the decks of the remnants of those who 
have been blown to pieces. I say, Ned, where should we have 
been if we had boarded with the pinnace ?” 

“ You always fall upon your feet Easy,” replied Gascoigne ; 
“ but that does not prove that you are right.” 

“I see there’s no convincing you, Ned, you are so con- 
foundedly fond of argument. However, I’ve no time to argue 
now — we must look to these poor fellows ; some are still 
alive.” 

Body after body was thrown through the ports, the habili- 
ments, in most cases, enabling them to distinguish whether it 
was that of a departed friend or foe. 

Jack turned round, and observed Mesty with his foot on a 
head which had been blown from the trunk. 

“ What are you about, Mesty ?” 

“Massa Easy, I look , at dis, and I tink it Massa Vigors’ 
head, and den I tink dis skull of his enemy nice present make 
to little Massa Gossett ; and den I tink again, and I say, no, 
he dead, and nebber trash any more — so let him go overboard.” 

Jack turned away, forgiving Vigors in his heart; he thought 
of the petty animosities of a midshipman’s berth, as he 
looked at the blackened portion of a body, half an hour before 
possessing intellect. 

“ Massa Easy,” said Mesty, “ I tink you say right, anyhow ; 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


221 


when you say forgive : den, Massa Vigors,” continued Mesty, 
taking up tlie head by the singed hair, and tossing it out of 
the port ; “ you really very, bad man — but Ashantee forgive 
you.” 

“ Here’s somebody alive,” said Gascoigne to Jack, examin- 
ing a body, the face of which was black as a cinder and not 
to be recognised, “ and he is one of our men, too, by his 
dress.” 

Our hero went up to examine, and to assist Gascoigne in 
disengaging the body from a heap of ropes and half-burnt 
tarpaulings with which it was entangled. Mesty followed, and 
looking at the lower extremities, said, “ Massa Easy, dat 
Massa Jolliffe, I know him trowsers ; marine tailor say he 
patchum forever, and so old dat de thread no hold ; yesterday 

he had dis patch put in, and marine tailor say he be d n if 

patch any more, please nobody.” 

Mesty was right ; it was poor Jolliffe, whose face was burnt 
as black as a coal by the explosion. He had also lost three 
fingers of the left hand, but as soon as he was brought out on 
the deck he appeared to recover, and pointed to his mouth for 
water, which was instantly procured. 

“ Mesty,” said Jack, “ I leave you in charge of Mr. Jolliffe ; 
take every care of him till I can come back.” 

The investigation was then continued, and four English 
sailors found who might be expected to recover, as well as 
about the same number of Frenchmen ; the remainder of the 
bodies were then thrown overboard. The hat only of the 
master was picked up between the guns, and there were but 
eleven Frenchmen found below. 

The vessel was the Franklin, a French privateer, of ten guns 
and sixty-five men, of which, eight men were away in prizes. 
The loss on the part of the vessel was forty-six killed and 
wounded. On that of the Harpy, it was five drowned in the 
cutter, and eighteen blown up belonging to the pinnace, out of 
which total of twenty-three, they had only Mr. Jolliffe and five 
seamen alive. 


228 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


“The Harpy is standing in with a breeze from the offing,” 
said Gascoigne to Easy. 

“ So much the better, for I am sick of this, Ned ; there is 
something so horrible in it, and I wish I was on board again. 
I have just been to Jolliffe ; he can speak a little ; I think 
he will recover. I hope so, poor fellow ; he will then obtain 
his promotion, for he is the commanding officer of all us who 
are left.” 

“ And if he does,” replied Gascoigne, he can swear that it 
was by having been blown up which spoilt his beauty — but 
here comes the Harpy. I have been looking for an English 
ensign to hoist over the French, but cannot find one ; so I 
hoist a weft over it — that will do.” 

The Harpy was soon hove-to close to the brig, and Jack 
went on board in the cutter to report what had taken place. 
Captain Wilson was much vexed and grieved at the loss of so 
many men : fresh hands were put in the cutter to man the 
pinnace, and he and Sawbridge both went on board to witness 
the horrible effects of the explosion as described by our hero. 

Jolliffe and the wounded men were taken on board, and all 
of them recovered. We have before stated how disfigured the 
countenance of poor Mr. Jolliffe had been by the small-pox — 
so severely was it burned that the whole of the countenance 
came off in three weeks like a mask, and every one declared 
that, seamed as it still was, Mr. Jolliffe was better looking than 
he was before. It may be as well here to state, that Mr. Jol- 
liffe not only obtained his promotion but a pension for his 
wounds, and retired from the service. He was still very plain, 
but as it was known that he had been blown up, the loss of his 
eye as well as the scars on his face were all put down to the 
same accident, and he excited interest as a gallant and maimed 
officer. He married, and lived contented and happy to a good 
old age. 

The Harpy proceeded with her prize to Mahon. Jack, as 
usual, obtained a great deal of credit ; whether he deserved it, 
or whether, as Gascoigne observed, he always fell upon his 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY 


229 


feet, the reader may decide from our narrative ; perhaps 
there was a little of both. The seamen of the Harpy, if sum- 
moned in a hurry, used very often to reply : “ Stop a minute, 
Fve got a bite” — as for Jack, he often said to himself, “I have 
a famous good yarn for the governor.” 


CHAPTER XXIII. 

JACK GOES ON ANOTHER CRUISE LOVE AND DIPLOMACY JACK 

PROVES HIMSELF TOO CLEVER FOR' THREE, AND UPSETS ALL THE 

ARRANGEMENTS OF THE HIGH CONTRACTING POWERS. 

A few days after the arrival of the Harpy at Port Mahon, a 
cutter came in with dispatches from the admiral. Captain 
Wilson found that he was posted into the Aurora ffrigate, in 
which a vacancy had been made by the result of our hero’s 
transgressions. 

Mr. Sawbridge was raised to the rank of commander, and 
appointed to the command of the Harpy. The admiral 
informed Captain Wilson, that he must detain the Aurora 
until the arrival of another frigate, hourly expected, and then 
she would be sent down to Mahon for him to take the com- 
mand of her. Further, he intimated that a supply of live 
bullocks would be very agreeable, and begged that he would 
send to Tetuan immediately. 

Captain Wilson had lost so many officers that he knew not 
whom to ^Ind : indeed, now he was no longer in command of 
the Harpy, and there was but one lieutenant, and no master or 
master’s mate. Gascoigne and Jack were the only two service- 
able midshipmen, and he was afraid to trust them on any expe- 
dition in which expedition was required. 

“ What shall we do, Sawbridge ? shall we send Easy or 
Gascoigne, or both, or neither ? — for if the bullocks are not 
forthcoming, the admiral will not let them off as we do.” 


230 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


“We must send somebody, Wilson,” replied Captain 
Sawbridge, “ and it is the custom to send two officers, as one 
receives the bullocks on board, while the other attends to the 
embarkation.” 

“ Well, then, send both, Sawbridge, but lecture them well 
first.” 

“ I don’t think they can get into any mischief there,” replied 
Sawbridge ; “ and it’s such a hole that they will be glad to 
get way from it.” 

. Easy and Gascoigne were summoned, listened very respect- 
fully to all Captain Sawbridge said, promised to conduct them- 
selves with the utmost propriety, received a letter to the vice- 
consul, and were sent with their hammocks and chests in the 
cabin on board the Eliza Ann, brig, of two hundred and sixteen 
tons, chartered by government — the master xmd crew of which 
were all busy forward heaving up their anchors. 

The master of the transport came aft to receive them : he 
was a short red-haired young man, with hands as broad as the 
flappers of a turtle ; he was broad-faced, broad-shouldered, 
well-freckled, and pug-nosed ; but if not very handsome he 
was remarkably good-humoured. As soon as the chests and 
hammocks were on the deck, he told them that when he could 
get the anchor up and make sail, he would give them some 
bottled porter. Jack proposed that he should get the porter 
up, and they would drink it while he got the anchor up, as it 
would save time. 

“ It may save time mayhap, but it won’t save porter,” re- 
plied the master ; “ However, you shall have it.” 

He called the boy, ordered him to bring up the porter, and 
then went forward. Jack made the boy bring up two chairs, 
put the porter on the companion hatch, and he and Gascoigne 
sat down. The anchor was weighed, and the transport ran 
out under her fore-topsail, as they were light-handed, and had 
to secure the anchor. The transport passed within ten yards 
of the Harpy, and Captain Sawbridge, when he perceived the 
two midshipmen taking it so very easy, sitting in their chairs 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


231 


with their legs crossed, arms folded, and their porter' before 
them, had a very great mind to order the transport to heave-to, 
but he could spare no other officer, so he walked away, saying 
to himself, “ There’ll be another yarn for the governor, or I’m 
mistaken.” 

As soon as sail was made on the transport, the master, 
whose name was Hogg, came up to our hero, and asked him 
how he found the porter. Jack declared that he never could 
venture an opinion upon the first bottle — “ So, Captain Hogg, 
we’ll trouble you for a second” — after which they troubled him 
for a third — begged for a fourth — must drink his health in a 
fifth, and finally, pointed out the propriety of making up the 
half-dozen. By this time they found themselves rather light- 
headed, so, desiring Captain Hogg to keep a sharp look-out, 
and not to call them on any account whatever, they retired to 
their hammocks. 

The next morning they awoke late ; the breeze was fresh 
and fair : they requested Captain Hogg not to consider the 
expense, as they would pay for all they ate and drank, and all 
he did, into the bargain, and promised him a fit-out when they 
got to Tetuan. 

What with this promise and calling him captain, our here 
and Gascoigne won the master’s heart, and being a very good- 
tempered fellow, they did what they pleased. Jack also tossed 
a doubloon to the men for them to drink on their arrival, and 
all the men of the transport were in a transport, at Jack’s 
coming to “ reign over them.” It must, be acknowledged that 
Jack’s reign was, for the most part of it, “ happy and glorious.” 
At last they arrived at Tetuan, and our Pylades and Orestes 
went on shore to call upon the vice-consul, accompanied by 
Captain Hogg. They produced their credentials and demanded 
bullocks. The vice-consul was a very young man, short and 
thin, and light-haired ; his father had held the situation before 
him, and he had been appointed his successor because nobody 
else had thought the situation worth applying for. Neverthe- 
less, Mr. Hicks was impressed with the immense responsibility 


232 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


of his office. It was, however, a place of some little emolu- 
ment at this moment, and Mr. Hicks had plenty on his hands 
besides his sister, who, being the only English lady there, set 
the fashion of the place, and usurped all the attention of the 
gentlemen mariners, who occasionally came for bullocks. But 
Miss Hicks knew her own importance, and had successively 
refused three midshipmen, one master’s mate, and an acting 
purser. African bullocks were plentiful at Tetuan, but English 
ladies were scarce ; moreover, she had a pretty little fortune 
of her own, to wit, three hundred dollars in a canvas bag, left 
her by her father, and entirely at her own disposal. Miss 
Hicks was very like her brother, except that she was more 
dumpling in her figure, with flaxen hair ; her features were 
rather pretty, and her skin very fair. As soon as the prelimi- 
naries had been entered into, and arrangements made in a 
small room with bare walls, which Mr. Hicks denominated his 
office, they were asked to walk into the parlour to be intro- 
duced to the vice-consul’s sister. Miss Hicks tossed her head 
at the two midshipmen, but smiled most graciously at Captain 
Hogg. She knew the relative ranks of midshipman and cap- 
tain. After a short time she requested the honour of Captain 
Hogg’s company to dinner, and begged that he would bring 
his midshipmen with him, at which Jack and Gascoigne looked 
at each other and burst out in a laugh, and Miss Hicks was 
very near rescinding the latter part of her invitation. As soon 
as they were out of the house, they told the captain to go on 
board and get all ready whilst they walked round the town, 
Having peeped into every part of it, and stared at Arabs, 
Moors, and Jews, till they were tired, they proceeded to the 
landing-place, where they met the captain, who informed them 
that he had done nothing, because the men were all drunk 
with Jack’s doubloon. Jack replied that a doubloon would 
not last for ever, and that the sooner they drank it out the 
better. They then returned to the vice-consul’s, whom they 
requested to procure for them fifty dozen of fowls, twenty 
sheep, and a great many other articles, which might be obtain- 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


233 


ed at the place ; for, as Jack said, they would live well going 
up to Toulon, and if there were any of the stock left, they 
would give them to the admiral, for Jack had taken the precau- 
tion to put his father's philosophy once more to the proof, before 
he quitted Mahon. As J ack gave such a liberal order, and 
the vice-consul cheated him out of at least one-third of what 
he paid, Mr. Hicks thought he could do no less than offer beds 
to our midshipmen as well as to Captain Hogg ; so, as soon as 
dinner was over they ordered Captain Hogg to go on board 
and bring their things on shore, which he did. As the time 
usual for transports remaining at Tetuan before they could be 
completed with bullocks was three weeks, our midshipmen 
decided upon staying at least so long if they could find any- 
thing to do, or if they could not, doing nothing was infinitely 
preferable to doing duty. So they took up their quarters at 
the vice-consul's, sending for porter and other things which 
were not to be had but from the transport ; and Jack, to 
prove that he was not a swindler, as Captain Tartar had called 
him, gave Captain Hogg a hundred dollars on account, for 
Captain Hogg had a large stock of porter and English luxuries, 
which he had brought out as a venture, and of which he had 
still a considerable portion left. As, therefore, our midship- 
men not only were cheated by the vice-consul, but they also 
supplied his table, Mr. Hicks was very hospitable, and every- 
thing was at their service except Miss Julia, who turned up 
her nose at a midshipman, even upon full pay ; but she made 
great advances to the captain, who, on his part, was desperate- 
ly in love : so the mate and the men made all ready for the bul- 
locks, Jack and Gascoigne made themselves comfortable, and 
Captain Hogg made love, and thus passed the first week. 

The chamber of Easy and Gascoigne was at the top of the 
house, and finding it exdessively warm, Gascoigne had forced 
his way up to the flat roof above ; (for the houses are all built 
in that way in most Mohammedan countries, to enable the occu- 
pants to enjoy the cool of the evening, and sometimes to sleep 
there.) Those roofs where houses are built next to each other, 


234 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


are divided by a wall of several feet, to insure that privacy 
which the Mohammedan customs demand. 

Gascoigne had not been long up there before he heard the 
voice of a female, singing a plaintive air in a low tone, on the 
other side of the wall. Gascoigne sang well himself, and hav- 
ing a very fine ear, he was pleased with the correctness of the 
notes, although he had never heard the air before. He leant 
against the wall, smoking his cigar, and listened. It was 
repeated again and again at intervals ; Gascoigne soon caught 
the notes, which sounded so clear and pure in the silence of the 
night. 

At last they ceased, and having waited another half hour 
in vain, our midshipman returned to his bed, humming the air 
which had so pleased his ear. It haunted him during his sleep, 
and rang in his ears when he awoke, as it is well known any 
new air that pleases us will do. Before breakfast was ready, 
Gascoigne had put English words to it, and sang them over 
and over, again. He inquired of the vice-consul who lived in 
the next house, and was answered, that it was an old Moor, 
who was reported to be wealthy, and to have a daughter, whom 
many of the people had asked in marriage, but whether for her 
wealth or for her beauty he could not tell ; he had, however, 
heard that she was very handsome. Gascoigne made no 
further inquiries, but went out with Jack and Captain Hogg, 
and on board to see the water got in for the bullocks. 

“ Where did you pick up that air, Gascoigne ? it is very 
pretty, but I never heard you sing it before.” 

Gascoigne told him, and also what he had heard from Mr. 
Hicks. 

“ Pm determined, Jack, to see that girl if I can. Hicks can 
talk Arabic fast enough; just ask him the Arabic for these 
words — ‘ Don’t be afraid — I love you — I cannot speak your 
tongue,’ — and put them down on paper as they are pronounced.” 

Jack rallied Gascoigne upon his fancy, which could end in 
nothing. 

“ Perhaps not,” replied Gascoigne ; “ and I should have cared 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


235 


nothing about it, if she had not sung so well. I really believe 
the way to my heart is through my ear ; — however, I shall try 
to-night, and soon find if she has the feeling which I think she 
has. Now let us go back ; I’m tired of looking at women in 
garments up to their eyes, and men in dirt up to their foreheads.” 

As they entered the house they heard an altercation between 
Mr. and Miss Hicks. 

“ I shall never give my consent, Julia ; one of those midship- 
men you turn your nose up at, is worth a dozen Hoggs.” 

“ Now, if we only knew the price of .a hog, in this country,” 
observed Easy, “ we should be able to calculate our exact value, 
Ned.” 

“ A hog, being an unclean animal, is not ” 

“ Hush,” said Jack. 

“ Mr. Hicks,” replied Miss Julia, “lam mistress of myself 
and my fortune, and I shall do as I please.” 

“Depend upon it, you shall not, Julia. I consider it my 
duty to prevent you from making an improper match ; and, as 
his Majesty’s representative here, I cannot allow you to marry 
this young man.” 

“ Mercy on us 1” said Gascoigne, “ his Majesty’s representa- 
tive !!” 

“ 1 shall not ask your consent, replied the lady.” 

“ Yes, but you shall not marry without my consent. I have, 
as you know, Julia, from- my situation here, as one of his Ma- 
jesty’s corps diplomatic , great power, and I shall forbid the 
banns ; in fact, it is only I who can marry you.” 

“ Then I’ll marry elsewhere.” 

“ And what will you do on board of .the transport until you 
are able to be married ?” 

“ I shall do as I think proper,” replied the lady ; and “ I’ll 
thank you for none of your indelicate insinuations.” So saying, 
the lady bounced out of the room into her own, and our midship- 
men then made a noise in the passage, to intimate that they had 
come in. They found Mr. Hicks looking very red and vice- 
consular indeed, but he recovered himself ; and Captain Hogg 


236 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


making his appearance, they went to dinner ; but Miss J ulia 
would not make her appearance, and Mr. Hicks was barely civil 
to the captain, but he was soon afterwards called out, and our 
midshipmen went into the office to enable the two lovers to meet. 
They were heard then talking together, and after a time they 
said less, and their language was more tender. 

“ Let us see what’s going on, Jack,” said Gascoigne ; and 
they walked softly, so as to perceive the two lovers, who were 
too busy to be on the look-out. 

Captain Hogg was requesting a lock of his mistres s’s hair. 
The plump Julia could deny him nothing ; she let fall her flaxen 
tresses, and taking out the scissors, cut off a thick bunch from 
her hair behind, which she presented to the captain ; it was at 
least a foot and a half long, and an inch in circumference. The 
captain took it in his immense hand, and thrust it into his coat- 
pocket behind, but one thrust down to the bottom w r ould not 
get it in, so he thrust again and again, until it was all coiled 
away like a cable in a tier. 

“ That’s a liberal girl,” whispered Jack ; “ she gives by 
wholesale what it will take some time to retail. But here comes 
Mr. Hicks, let’s give them warning ; I like Hogg, and as she 
fancies pork, she shall have it, if I can contrive to help them.” 

That night Gascoigne went again on the roof, and after wait- 
ing some time, heard the same air repeated : he waited until it 
was concluded, and then, in a very lotf tone, sung it himself to 
the words he had arranged for it. For some time all was 
silent, and then the singing recommenced, but it was not to the 
same air. Gascoigne waited until the new air had been re- 
peated several times, and then, giving full scope to his fine 
tenor voice, sang the first air again. It echoed through the 
silence of the night air, and then he waited, but in vain ; the 
soft voice of the female was heard no more, and Gascoigne re- 
tired to rest. 

This continued for three or four nights, Gascoigne singing 
the same airs the ensuing night that he had heard the preceding, 
until at last it appeared that the female had no longer any fear, 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


23 ? 


but changed the airs so as to be amused with the repetition of 
them next evening. On the fifth night she sang the first air, 
and our midshipman responding, she then sang another, until 
she had sung them all, waiting each time for the response. 
The wall was not more than eight feet high, and Gascoigne now 
determined, with the assistance of Jack, to have a sight of his 
unknown songstress. He asked Captain Hogg to bring on 
shore some inch line, and he contrived to make a ladder with 
three or four poles which were up stairs, used for drying linen. 
He fixed them against the wall without noise, all ready for the 
evening. It was a beautiful clear moonlight night, when he 
went up, accompanied by Jack. The air was again sung, and 
repeated by Gascoigne, who then softly mounted the ladder, 
held by Jack, and raised his head above the wall ; he perceived 
a young Moorish girl, splendidly dressed, half-lying on an otto- 
man, with her eyes fixed upon the moon, whose rays enabled 
him to observe that she was indeed beautiful. She appeared 
lost in contemplation ; and Gascoigne would have given the 
world to have divined her thoughts. Satisfied with what he 
had seen, he descended, and singing one of the airs, he then 
repeated the words, “ Ho not be afraid — I love you — I cannot 
speak your language.” He then sang another of the airs, and 
after he had finished he again repeated the words in Arabic : 
but there was- no reply. He sang the third air, and again re- 
peated the words, when, to his delight, he heard an answer in 
Lingua Franca. 

“ Can you speak in this tongue ?”’ 

“ Yes,” replied Gascoigne, “ I can, Allah be praised. Be 
not afraid — I love you.” 

“I know you not ; who are you ? you are not of my people.” 

“Ho, but I will be anything that you wish. I am a Frank, 
and an English officer.” 

At this reply of Gascoigne there was a pause. 

“ Am I then despised ?” said Gascoigne. 

“No, not despised, but you are not of my people or of my 
land ; speak no more, or you will be heard ” 


238 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


“ I obey,” replied Gascoigne ; “ since you wish it, but I shall 
pine until to-morrow’s moon. I go to dream of you. Allah 
protect you I” 

“ How amazingly poetical you were in your language, Ned,” 
said Easy, when they went down into their room. 

“ To be sure, Jack, I’ve read the Arabian nights. You never 
saw such eyes in your life : what a houri she is !” 

“ Is she as handsome as Agnes, Ned ?” 

“ Twice as handsome by moonlight.” 

“ That’s all moonshine, and so will be your courting, for it 
will come to nothing.” 

“ Not if I can help it.” 

“ Why, Gascoigne, what would you do with a wife 1” 

“Just exactly what you would do, Jack.” 

“ I mean, my dear Ned, can you afford to marry ?” 

“Not while the old governor lives, but I know he has some 
money in the funds. He told me one day, that I could not 
expect more than three thousand pounds. You know I have 
sisters.” 

“ And before you come into that you’ll have three thousand 
children.” 

“ That’s a large family, Jack,” replied Gascoigne, bursting 
out into laughter, in which our hero joined. 

“Well, you know I only wanted to argue the point with you.” 

“ I know that, Jack ; but I think we’re counting our chickens 
before they are hatched, which is foolish.” 

“In every other case except when we venture upon matri- 
mony.” 

“Why, Jack, you’re becoming quite sensible.” 

“ My wisdom is for my friends, my folly for myself. Good 
night.” 

But Jack did not go to sleep. “ I must not allow Gascoigne 
to do such a foolish thing,” thought he — “ marry a dark girl 
on midshipman’s pay, if he succeeds, — get his throat cut if he 
does not.” As Jack said, his wisdom was for his friends, and 
he was*so generous that he reserved none for his own occasions 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


289 


Miss Julia Hicks, as we before observed, set the fashions at 
Tetuan, and her style of dress was not unbecoming. The 
Moorish women wore large veils, or they may be called what 
you will, for their head-dresses descend to their heels at times, 
and cover the whole body, leaving an eye to peep with, and 
hiding every thing else. How Miss found this much more con- 
venient than the bonnet, as she might walk out in the heat of 
the sun without burning her fair skin, and stare at every body 
and every thing without being stared at in return. She there- 
fore never went out without one of these overalls, composed of 
several yards of fine muslin. Her dress in the house was usually 
of coloured sarcenet, for a small vessel came into the port one 
day during her father’s lifetime, unloaded a great quantity of 
bales of goods with English marks ; and as the vessel had gone 
out in ballast, there was a surmise on his part by what means 
they came into the captain’s* possession. He therefore cited the 
captain up to the governor, but the affair was amicably ar- 
ranged by the vice-consul receiving about one quarter of the 
cargo in bales of silks and muslins. Miss Hicks had therefore all 
her dresses of blue, green, and yellow sarcenet, which, with the 
white muslin overall, made her as conspicuous as the only 
Frankish lady in the town had a right to be, and there was not 
a dog which barked in Tetuan which did not know the sister 
of the vice-consul, although few had seen her face. 

How it occurred to Jack, as Gascoigne was determined to 
carry on his amour, that in case of surprise it would be as well 
if he dressed himself as Miss Hicks. He proposed it to Gas- 
coigne the next morning, who approved of the idea, and in the 
course of the day, when Miss Hicks was busy with Captain 
Hogg, he contrived to abstract one of her dresses and muslin 
overalls — which he could do in safety, as there were plenty of 
them, for Miss Hicks was not troubled with mantua-makers’ 
bills. 

When Gascoigne went up on the roof the ensuing night, he 
put on the apparel of Miss Hicks, and looked very like her as 
far as figure went, although a little taller. He waited for the 


240 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


Moo^ sh girl to sing, but she did not — so he crept up the lad- 
der 5\nd looked over the wall — when he observed that she was 
reclining, as before, in deep thought. His head covered with 
muslin caught her eye, and she gave a faint scream. 

“ F.ar not, lady,” said Gascoigne, “it is not the first time 
that I have beheld that sweet face. I sigh for a companion. 
What would I not give to be sitting by your side ? I am not 
of your creed, *tis true — but does it therefore follow that we 
should not love each other ?” 

The Moorish girl was about to reply, when Gascoigne re- 
ceived an answer from a quarter whence he little expected it. 
It was from the Moor himself, who, hearing his daughter 
scream, had come swiftly up to the roof. 

“Hoes the Frankish lily wish to mingle her perfumes with 
the dark violet ?” said he, for he had often seen the sister of the 
vice-consul, and he imagined it was she who had come on the 
roof and ascended the wall to speak with his daughter. 

Gascoigne had presence of mind to avail himself of this for- 
tunate mistake. 

“ I am alone, worthy Moor,” replied he, pulling the muslin 
more over his face, “ and I pine for a companion. I have been 
charmed by the nightingale on the roof of your dwelling ; but I 
thought not to meet the face of a man, when I took courage to 
climb this ladder.” 

“ If the Frankish lily will have courage to descend, she can 
sit by the side of the dark violet.” 

Gascoigne thought it advisable to make no reply. 

“ Fear not,” said the old Moor ; “ what is an old man but a 
woman ?” and the Moor brought a ‘ladder, which he placed 
against the wall. 

After a pause, Gascoigne said* “ It is my fate ;” and he then 
descended, and was lead by the Moor to the mattress upon 
which his daughter reclined. The Moor then took his seat near 
them, and they entered into conversation. Gascoigne knew 
quite enough of the vice-consul and his daughter to play his 
part — and he thought proper to tell the Moor that her brother 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


241 


wished to give her as w r ife to the captain of the ship, whom she 
abhorred, and would take her to a cold and foggy climate ; 
that she had been born here, and wished to live and die here, 
and would prefer passing her life in his women’s apartments, to 
leaving this country. At which Abd el Faza, for such was his 
name, felt very amorous ; he put his hand to his forehead, 
salaamed, and told Gascoigne that his zenana, and all that were 
in it, w r ere hers, as well as his house and himself. After an 
hour’s conversation, in which Azar, his daughter, did not join, 
the old Moor asked Gascoigne to descend into the women’s 
apartment — and observing his daughter’s silence, said to her — 

“ Azar, you are angry that this Frankish houri should come 
to the apartments of which you have hitherto been sole mistress. 
Fear not, you will soon be another’s, for Osman Ali has asked 
thee for his wife, and I have listened to his request.” 

Now Osman Ali was as old as her father, and Azar hated 
him. She offered her hand tremblingly, and led Gascoigne into 
the zenana. The Moor attended them to the threshold, bowed, 
and left them. 

That Gascoigne had time to press his suit, and that he did 
not lose such a golden opportunity, may easily be imagined, and 
her father’s communication relative to Osmah Ali very much 
assisted our midshipman’s cause. 

He left the zenana like most midshipmen in love, that is a lit- 
tle above quicksilver boiling heat. Jack, who had remained 
in a state of some suspense all this time, was not sorry to hear 
voices in an amicable tone, and in a few minutes afterwards he 
perceived that Gascoigne was ascending the ladder. It occur- 
red to our hero that it was perhaps advisable that he should 
not be seen, as the Moor, in his gallantry, might come up the 
ladder with the supposed lady. He was right, for Abd el Faza 
not only followed her up the ladder on his side, but assisted 
\\er to descend on the other, and with great ceremony took his 
leave. 

Gascoigne hastened to Jack, who had been peeping, and 
gave him a detail of what liad passed, describing Azar as the 

a 


242 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


most beautiful, facinating, and fond creature that ever was cre- 
ated. After half-an-hour’s relation, he stopped short, because 
he discovered that Jack was fast asleep. 

The visits of Gascoigne were repeated every night ; old Abd 
el Faza became every time more gallant, and our midshipman 
was under the necessity of assuming a virtue if he had it not. 
He pretended to be very modest. 

In the mean time Captain Hogg continued his attentions to 
the real Miss Hicks ; the mate proceeded to get the bullocks 
on board, and as more than three weeks had already passed 
away, it was time to think of departing for Toulon ; but Cap- 
tain Hogg was too much in love, and as for Gascoigne, he in- 
tended, like all midshipmen in love, to give up the service. 
J ack reasoned with the captain, who appeared to listen to rea- 
son, because Miss Hicks had agreed to follow his fortunes, and 
crown his transports in the transport Mary Ann. He there- 
fore proposed that they should get away as fast as they could, 
and as soon as they had weighed the anchor, he would come on 
shore, take off Miss Hicks, and make all sail for Toulon. 

Jack might have suffered this ; the difficulty was with Gas- 
coigne, who would not hear of going away without his lovely 
Azar. At last Jack planned a scheme, which he thought would 
succeed, and which would be a good joke to tell the governor. 
He therefore appeared to consent to Gascoigne’s carrying off 
his little Moor, and they canvassed how it was to be managed. 
Jack then told Gascoigne that he had hit upon a plan which 
would succeed. “ I find,” said he, “ from Captain Hogg, that 
he has an intention of carrying off Miss Hicks, and when I 
sounded him as to having a lady with you, he objected to it 
immediately, saying that he must have all the cabin to himself 
and his intended How, in the first place, I have no notion of 
giving up the cabin to Miss Hicks or Mrs. Hogg. It will be 
very uncomfortable to be shut out, because he wishes to make 
love ; I therefore am determined that he shall not take off 
Miss Hicks. He has proposed to me that he shall go on 
board, and get the brig under way, leaving me with a boat on 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


243 


shore to sign the vouchers, and that Miss Hicks shall slip into 
the boat when I go off at dusk. Now I will not bring off Miss 
Hicks ; if he wants to marry her, let him do it when I am not 
on board. I have paid for everything, and I consider the cabin 
as mine. 

“ Look you, Ned, if you wish to carry off your little Moor, 
there is but one way, and that is a very simple one ; leave her 
a dress of Miss Hick’s when you go there to-morrow night, and 
tell her to slip down at dusk, and come out of the house : all 
the danger will be in her own house, for as soon as she is out, 
she will be supposed to be the vice-consul’s sister, and will not 
be observed or questioned. I will look out for and bring her 
on board instead of Miss Hicks. Hogg will have the brig 
under way, and will be too happy to make all sail, and she 
shall lock the cabin inside, so that the mistake shall not be dis- 
covered till the next morning, and we shall have a good laugh 
at Captain Hogg. 

Gascoigne pronounced that Jack’s scheme was capital, and 
agreed to it, thanking him, and declaring that he was the best 
friend that he ever had. “ So I will be,” thought Jack, “ but 
you will not acknowledge it at first.” Jack then went to Cap- 
tain Hogg, and appeared to enter warmly into his views, but 
told him that Hicks suspected what was going on, and had told 
him so, at the same time declaring that he would not lose sight 
of his sister until after Hogg was on board. 

“Now,” says Jack, “you know you cannot do the thing by 
main force; so the best plan will be for you to go on board and 
get under way, leaving me to bring off Miss Hicks, when her 
brother will imagine all danger to be over.” 

“ Many thanks, Mr. Easy,” replied Captain Hogg ; “it wil 
be capital, and I’ll arrange it all with my Sophy. How very 
kind of you !” r 

“ But, Hogg, will you promise me secrecy ?” 

“ Yes,” replied the captain. 

“ That Gascoigne is a very silly fellow, and wants to run 
away with a girl he has made acquaintance with here ; and 


244 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


what do you think he has proposed ? that after the ship was 
under way, that I shall carry her off in the boat ; and he has 
borrowed one of the dresses of Miss Hicks, that it may appear 
to be her. I have agreed to it, but as I am determined that 
he shall not commit such a folly, I shall bring off Miss Hicks 
instead ; and, observe, Hogg, he is that sort of wild fellow^that 
if he was to find that I had cheated him, he would immediately 
go on shore and be left behind therefore we must hand Miss 
Hicks down in the cabin, and she will lock the door all night, 
so that he may not observe the trick till the next morning, and 
then we shall have a fine laugh at him.” 

Captain Hogg replied it would be an excellent joke, as Gas- 
coigne did before him. 

Now it must be observed, that the water and the bullocks, 
and the sheep and fowls, were all on board ; and Mr. Hicks, 
having received his money from Jack, had very much altered 
his manner ; he was barely civil, for as he got all he could out 
of our hero, he was anxious to get rid of him as well as of Cap- 
tain Hogg. Our hero was very indignant at this, but as it 
would not suit his present views, pretended not to notice it — on 
the contrary, he professed the warmest friendship for the vice- 
consul, and took an opportunity of saying that he could not 
return his kindness in a better way than by informing him of 
the plot which had been arranged. He then told him of the 
intended escape of his sister, and that he was the person in- 
tended to bring her off. 

“ Infamous, by heavens !” cried the vice-consul ; “I shall 
write to the foreign office on the subject.” 

“ I think,” said Jack, “ it will be much better to do what I 
shall propose, which will end in a hearty laugh, and to the con- 
fusion of Captain Hogg. Do you dress yourself in your sister’s 
clothes, and I will bring you off instead of her. Let him imagine 
that he has your sister secure ; I will hand you down to the 
cabin, and do you lock yourself in. He cannot sail without my 
orders, and I will not sign the vouchers. The next morning we 
will open the cabin door and have a good laugh at him. Desire 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


245 


your boat to be off at daylight to take you on shore, and I will 
then make him proceed to Toulon forthwith. It will be a capi- 
tal joke.” 

“ So thought the vice-consul, as well as Gascoigne and Cap- 
tain Hogg. He shook hands with Jack,, and was as civil to 
him as before. 

That night Gascoigne left one of Miss Hicks’s many dresses 
with Azar, who agreed to follow his fortunes, and who packed 
up all the jewels and money she could lay her hands upon. 
Poor little child, she trembled with fear and delight. Miss Hicks 
smuggled, as she thought, a box of clothes on board, and in the 
box was her fortune of three hundred dollars. Mr. Hicks 
laughed in his sleeve, so did Jack ; and every one went to bed, 
with expectations that their wishes would be realised. After 
an early dinner, Captain Hogg and Gascoigne went on board, 
both squeezing Jack’s hand as if they were never to see 
him again, and looks of intelligence passed between all the 
parties. 

As soon as they were out of the door the vice-consul chuckled, 
and Miss Hicks, who thought he chuckled at the idea of having 
rid himself of Captain Hogg, chuckled still more as she looked 
at our hero, who was her confidant ; and our hero, for reasons 
known to the reader, chuckled more than either of them. 

A little before dark, the boat was sent on shore from the 
brig, which was now under way, and Mr. Hicks, as had been 
agreed, said that he should go into the office and prepare the 
vouchers — that is, put on his sister’s clothes. Miss Hicks im- 
mediately rose, and wishing our hero a pleasant voyage, as had 
been agreed, said that she should retire for the night, as she had 
a bad headache — she wished her brother good night, and went 
into her room to wait another hour, when our hero, having 
shoved off the boat to deceive the vice-consul, was to return, 
meet her in the garden, and take her off to the brig. Our hero 
then went into the office and assisted the vice-consul, who took 
off all his own clothes and tied them up in a handkerchief, in* 
tending to resume them after he had gone into the cabin. 


246 


MR; MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


As soon as he was ready, Jack carried his bundle and led the 
supposed Miss Hicks down to the boat. They shoved off in a 
great hurry, and Jack took an opportunity of dropping Mr. 
Hick’s bundle overboard. As soon as they arrived alongside, 
Mr. Hicks ascended, and was handed by Jack down into the 
cabin : he squeezed J ack’s hand as he entered, saying in a whis- 
per, “ To-morrow morning what a laugh we shall have !” and 
then he locked the door. In the mean time the boat was hooked 
on and hoisted up, and Jack took the precaution to have the 
dead lights lowered, that Mr. Hicks might not be able to 
ascertain what was going on. Gascoigne came up to our hero 
and squeezed his hand. 

“ I’m so much obliged to you, Jack. I say, to-morrow morn- 
ing what a laugh we shall have !” 

As soon as the boat was up, and the mainyard filled, Captain 
Hogg also came up to our hero, shaking him by the hand and 
thanking him ; and he too concluded by saying, “ I say Mr. 
Easy, to-morrow morning what a laugh we shall have I” 

“ Let those laugh who win,” thought Jack. 

The wind was fair, the watch was set, the course was steered, 
and all went down to their hammocks, and went to sleep, wait- 
ing for to-morrow morning. Mr. Hicks, also, having nothing 
better to do, went to sleep, and by the morning dawn, the 
transport Mary Ann was more than a hundred miles from the 
African shore. 


CHAPTER XXIV. 

OUR HERO PLAYS THE VERY DEVIL. 

We must leave the reader to imagine the effect of the next 
morning’s denouement. Every one was in a fury except Jack, 
who did nothing but laugh. The captain wanted to return to 
obtain Miss Hicks, Gascoigne to obtain Azar, and the vice- 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


247 


consul to obtain his liberty — but the wind was foul for their 
return, and Jack soon gained the captain on his side. He 
pointed out to him that, in the first place, if he presumed to 
return, he would forfeit his charter bond ; in the second, he 
would have to pay for all the bullocks which died ; in the 
third, that if he wished to take Miss Hicks as his wife, he must 
not first injure her character by having her on board before 
the solemnity ; and lastly, that he could always go and marry 
her whenever he pleased ; the brother could not prevent him. 
All this was very good advice, and the captain became quite 
calm and rational, and set his studding-sails below and aloft. 

As for Gascoigne, it was no use reasoning with him, so it 
was agreed that he should have satisfaction as soon as they 
could get on shore again. Mr. Hicks was the most violent ; 
he insisted that the vessel should return, while both Jack and 
the captain refused, although he threatened them with the 
whole foreign office. He insisted upon having his clothes, but 
Jack replied that they had tumbled overboard as they pulled 
from the shore. He then commanded the mate and men to 
take the vessel back, but they laughed at him and his woman’s 
clothes. “ At all events, I’ll have you turned out of the 
service,” said he to our hero in his fury. “I shall be ex- 
tremely obliged to you,” said Jack — and Captain Hogg was 
so much amused with the vice consul’s appearance in his 
sister’s clothes, that he quite forgot his own disappointment 
in laughing at his intended brother-in-law. He made friends 
again with Jack, who regained his ascendancy, and ordered 
out the porter on the capstern-head. They had an excellent 
dinner, but Mr. Hicks refused to join them, which, however, 
did not spoil the appetite of Jack or the captain ; as for Gas- 
coigne, he could not eat a mouthful, but he drank to excess, 
looking over the rim of his tumbler as if he could devour our 
hero, who only laughed the more. Mr. Hicks had applied to 
the men to lend him some clothes, but Jack had foreseen that, 
and he was omnipotent. There was not a jacket or a pair of 
trousers to be had for love or money. Mr. Hicks then con* 


248 MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 

sidered it advisable to lower his tone, and he applied to Cap- 
tain Hogg, who begged to be excused without he consented 
to his marriage with his sister, to which Mr. Hicks gave an 
indignant negative. He then applied to Gascoigne, who told 
him in a very surly tone to go to h — 11. At last he applied to 
our hero, who laughed, and said he would see him d — d first. 
So Mr. Hicks sat down in his petticoats and vowed revenge. 
Gascoigne, who had drunk much and eaten nothing, turned in 
and went to sleep — while Captain Hogg and our hero drank 
porter on the capstern. Thus passed the first day, and the 
wind was famously fair — the bullocks lowed, the cocks crew, 
the sheep baa’d, and the Mary Ann made upwards of two 
hundred miles. J ack took possession of the other berth in the 
cabin, and his Majesty’s representative was obliged to lie down 
in his petticoats upon a topsail which lay between decks, with 
a bullock on each side of him, who every now and then made 
a dart at him with their horns, as if they knew that it was to 
him that they were indebted for their embarkation, and being 
destined to drive the scurvy out of the Toulon fleet. 

We cannot enter into the details of the passage, which, as 
the wind was fair, was accomplished in ten days without the 
loss of a bullock. During this time Mr. Hicks condescended 
to eat without speaking, imagining that the hour of retribution 
would come, when they joined the admiral. Gascoigne gradu- 
ally recovered himself, but did not speak to our hero, who 
continued to laugh and drink porter. On the eleventh morn- 
ing they were in the midst of the Toulon fleet, and Mr. Hicks 
smiled exultingly as he passed our hero in his petticoats, and 
wondered that Jack showed no signs of trepidation. 

The fleet hove-to, Jack ran under the admiral’s stern, 
lowered down his boat and went on board, showed his cre- 
dentials, and reported his bullocks. The general signal was 
made, there was a fair division of the spoil, and then the 
admiral asked our hero whether the master of the trans- 
port had any other stock on board. Jack replied that he 
had not ; but that having been told by the governor of Malta 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


249 


that they might be acceptable, he had bought a few sheep 
and some dozen of fowls, which were much at his service, 
if he would accept of them. The admiral was much obliged 
to the governor, and also to Jack, for thinking of him, but 
would not, of course, accept of the stock without paying for 
them. He requested him to send all of them on board that 
he could spare, and then asked Jack to dine with him, for 
Jack had put on his best attire, and looked very much of a 
gentleman. 

“Mr. Easy,” said the flag-captain, who had been looking 
at the transport with his glass, “is that the master’s wife 
on board ?” # 

“No, sir,” replied Jack ; “it’s the vice-consul.” 

“What, in petticoats ! the vice-consul ?” 

“Yes, the vice-consul of Tetuan. He came on board in 
that dress when the brig was under way, and I considered 
it my duty not to delay, being aware how very important it 
was that the fleet should be provided with fresh beef.” 

“ What is all this, Mr. Easy ?” said the admiral ; “ there 
has been some trick here. You will oblige me by coming 
into the cabin.” 

Easy followed the admiral and flag-captain into the cabin, 
and then boldly told the whole story how he tricked them 
all. It was impossible for either of them to help laughing, 
and when they began to laugh it was almost as impossible 
to stop. 

“ Mr. Easy,” said the admiral at last, “ I do not altogether 
blame you ; it appears that the captain of the transport would 
have delayed sailing because he was in love — and that Mr. 
Gascoigne would have stayed behind because he was infatu- 
ated ; independent of the ill-will against the English which 
would have been excited by the abduction of the girl. But 
I think you might have contrived to manage all that without 
putting the vice-consul in petticoats.” 

“I acted to the best of my judgment, sir,” replied Jack 
very humbly. 


11 * 


250 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


“And altogether you have done well. Captain Malcolm 
send a boat for the vice-consul.” 

Mr. Hicks was too impatient to tell his wrongs to care 
for his being in his sister’s clothes ; he came on board, and 
although the tittering was great, he imagined that it would 
soon be all in his favour, when it was known that he was a 
diplomatic. He told his story, and waited for the decision 
of the admiral, which was to crush our hero, who stood with 
the midshipmen on the lee-side of the deck ; but the admiral 
replied, “Mr. Hicks, in the first place, this appears to me 
to be a family affair concerning the marriage of your sister, 
with which I have nothing tp do.* You went on board of 
your own free-will in woman’s clothes. Mr. Easy’s orders 
were positive, and he obeyed them. It was his duty to sail 
as soon as the transport was ready. You may forward your 
complaint if you please, but, as a friend, I tell you that it 
will probably occasion your dismissal, for these kind of pranks 
are not understood at the foreign office. You may return to 
the transport, which, after she has touched at Mahon will 
proceed again to Tetuan. The boat is alongside, sir.” 

Mr. Hicks, astonished at the want of respect paid to a 
vice-consul, shoved his petticoats between his legs and went 
down the side amidst the laughter of the whole of the ship’s 
company. Our hero dined with the admiral, and was well 
received. He got his orders to sail that night for Minorca, 
and as soon as dinner was over he returned on board, where 
he found Captain Hogg very busy selling his porter — Gas- 
coigne walking the deck in a brown study — and Mr. Hicks 
solus abaft, sulking in his petticoats. 

As soon as they were clear of the boats, the Mary Ann 
hoisted her ensign and made sail, and as all the porter was 
not yet sold, Jack ordered up a bottle. 

Jack was much pleased with the result of his explanation 
with the admiral, and he felt that, for once, he had not only 
got into no scrape himself, but that he had prevented others. 
Gascoigne walked the deck gloomily ; the fact was, that 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


251 


he was very unhappy ; he had had time to reflect, and now 
that the first violence had subsided, he felt that our hero 
had done him a real service, and had prevented him from 
committing an act of egregious folly ; and yet he had sum- 
moned his friend to meet him in the field — and such had been 
his gratitude. He would have given the world to recall what 
had passed, and to make friends, but he felt ashamed, as most 
people do, to acknowledge his error ; he had, however, almost 
made up his mind to it, and was walking up and down thinking 
in what manner he might contrive it, when Jack, who was, 
sitting, as usual, in a chair by the capstern, with his porter 
by him, said to himself, “ Now I’ll lay my life that Ned wants 
to make friends, and is ashamed to speak first ; I may be 
mistaken, and he may fly off at a tangent, but even if I am, 
at all events, it will not be I who am wrong — 1 7 11 try him.” 
Jack waited till Gascoigne passed him again, and then said, 
looking kindly and knowingly in his face, 

“ I say, Ned, will you have a glass of porter ?” 

Gascoigne smiled, and Jack held out his hand ; the recon- 
ciliation was effected in a moment, and the subject of quarrel 
was not canvassed by either party. 

“We shall be at Minorca in a day or two,” observed 
Jack, after a while ; “ now I shall be glad to get there. 
Do you know, Ned, that I feel very much satisfied with 
myself ; I have got into no scrape this time, and I shall, not- 
withstanding, have a good story to tell the governor when I go 
to Malta.” 

“ Partly at my expense,” replied Gascoigne. 

“ Why, you will figure a little in it, but others will figure 
much more.” 

“ I wonder what has become of that poor girl,” observed 
Gascoigne, who could not refrain from mentioning her ; 
“ what hurts me most is, that she must think me such a 
brute.” 

“No doubt of that, Ned, — take another glass of porter.” 

“ Her father gave me this large diamond.” 


252 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


“ The old goat — sell it, and drink his health with it.” 

“ No, I ’ll keep it in memory of his daughter.” 

Here Gascoigne fell into a melancholy reverie, and Jack 
thought of Agnes. 

In two days they arrived at Mahon, and found the Aurora 
already there, in the command of Captain Wilson. Mr. Hicks 
had persuaded Captain Hogg to furnish him with clothes, 
Jack having taken off the injunction as soon as he had quitted 
the admiral. Mr. Hicks was aware, that if the admiral would 
not listen to his complaint, it was no use speaking to a captain: 
so he remained on board, a pensioner upon Captain Hogg, and 
after our midshipmen quitted the transport they became very 
good friends. Mr. Hicks consented to the match, and Captain 
Hogg was made happy. As for poor Azar, she had wandered 
about until she was tired, in Miss Hicks’s dress, and at last 
returned broken-hearted to her father’s, and was admitted 
by Abd el Faza himself ; he imagined it was Miss Hicks, and 
was in transports — he discovered it was his daughter, and 
he was in a fury. The next day she went to the zenana of 
Osman Ali. 

When Jack reported himself he did not tell the history 
of the elopements, that he might not hurt the feelings of 
Gascoigne. Captain Wilson was satisfied with the manner in 
which he had executed his orders, and asked him, “ whether 
he preferred staying in the Harpy, or following him into the 
Aurora.” 

Jack hesitated. 

“ Speak frankly, Mr. Easy ; if you prefer Captain Sawbridge 
to me, I shall not be affronted.” 

“ No, sir,” replied Easy, “ I do not prefer Captain Saw 
bridge to you ; you have both been equally kind to me, but 
I prefer you. But the fact is, sir, that I do not much like tc 
part with Gascoigne, or ” 

“ Or who ?” said the captain, smiling. 

“With Mesty, sir. You may think me very foolish— but 
I should not be alive at this moment, if it had not been for him.” 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


253 


“I do not consider gratitude to be foolish, Mr. Easy,” 
replied Captain Wilson. “ Mr. Gascoigne I intend to take 
with me, if he chooses to come, as I have a great respect for 
his father, and no fault to find with him, that is, generally 
speaking — but as for Mesty — why he is a good man, and as 
you have behaved yourself very well, perhaps I may think 
of it.” 

The next day Mesty was included among the boat’s crew 
taken with him by Captain Wilson, according to the regu- 
lations of the service, and appointed to the same situation under 
the master at arms of the Aurora. Gascoigne and our hero 
were also discharged into the frigate. 

As our hero never has shown any remarkable predilection for 
duty, the reader will not be surprised at his requesting from 
Captain Wilson a few days on shore, previous to his going 
on board of the Aurora. Captain Wilson allowed the same 
license to Gascoigne, as they had both been cooped up for 
some time on board of a transport. Our hero took up his 
quarters at the only respectable hotel in the town, and 
whenever he could meet an officer of the Aurora, he very 
politely begged the pleasure of his company to dinner. Jack’s 
reputation had gone before him, and the midshipmen drank his 
wine and swore he was a trump. Not that Jack was to 
be deceived, but, upon the principles of equality, he argued 
that it was the duty of those who could afford dinners to give 
them to those who could not. This was a sad error on Jack’s 
part ; but he had not yet learnt the value of money ; he 
was such a fool as to think that the only real use of it was 
to make other people happy. It must, however, be offered 
in his extenuation that he was a midshipman and a philosopher, 
and not yet eighteen. 

At last Jack had remained so long on shore, keeping open 
house, and the first-lieutenant of the Aurora found the officers 
so much more anxious for leave, now that they were at little or 
no expense, that he sent him a very polite message, requesting 
the pleasure of his company on board that evening. Jack 


254 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


returned an equally polite answer, informing the first-lieutenan 
that not being aware that he wished to see him, he had 
promised to accompany some friends to a masquerade that 
night, but that he would not fail to pay his respects to him the 
next day. The first-lieutenant admitted the excuse, and our 
hero, after having entertained half-a-dozen of the Auroras, 
for the Harpy had sailed two days before, dressed himself 
for the masquerade, which was held in a church about two 
miles and a half from Mahon. 

Jack had selected the costume of the devil, as being the 
most appropriate, and mounting a jackass, he rode down 
in his dress to the masquerade. But, as Jack was just going 
in, he perceived a yellow carriage, with two footmen in gaudy 
liveries, draw up, and, with his usual politeness, when the 
footmen opened the door, offered his arm to hand out a fat 
old dowager covered with diamonds ; the lady looked up, 
and perceiving Jack covered with hair, with his trident and his 
horns, and long tail, gave a loud scream, and would have fallen 
had it not been for Captain Wilson, who, in his full uniform, 
was coming in, and caught her in his arms : while the old lady 
thanked him, and Captain Wilson bowed, Jack hastily retreated, 
“ I shall make no conquests to-night,” thought he, so he entered 
the church, and joined the crowd ; but it was so dense that it 
was hardly possible to move, and our hero soon got tired 
of flourishing 'his trident, and sticking it into people, who won- 
dered what the devil he meant. 

“ This is stupid work,” thought Jack, “ I may have more fun 
outside :” so Jack put on his cloak, left the maquerade, and 
went out in search of adventures. He walked into the open 
country, about half a mile, until he came to a splendid house, 
standing in a garden of orange-trees, which he determined 
to reconnoitre. He observed that a window was open and 
lights were in the room; and he climbed up to the window, and 
just opened the white curtain and looked in. On a bed lay an 
elderly person, evidently dying, and by the side of the bed 
were three priests, one of whom held the crucifix in his hand. 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


255 


another the censer, and a third was sitting at a table with 
a paper, pen, and ink. As Jack understood Spanish, he 
listened, and heard one of the priests say, — 

“ Your sins have been enormous, my son, and I cannot 
give you extreme unction or absolution unless you make some 
amends.” 

“ I have,” answered the moribund. “ left money for ten 
thousand masses to be said for my soul.” 

“ Five hundred thousand masses are not sufficient : how have 
you gained your enormous wealth ? by usury and robbing the 
poor.” 

“ I have left a thousand dollars to be distributed among the 
poor on the day of my funeral.” 

“ One thousand dollars is nothing — you must leave all your 
property to holy church.” 

“ And my children,” replied the dying man, faintly. 

“ What are your children compared to your salvation ? — 
reply not : either consent, or not only do I refuse you the con- 
solation of the dying, but I excommunicate ■” 

“ Mercy, holy father — mercy 1” said the old man, in a dying 
voice. 

“ There is no mercy, you are damned forever and ever. 
Amen. Now hear : excommunicabo te ” 

“ Stop — stop — have you the paper ready ?” 

“ ’Tis here, all ready, by which you revoke all former wills, 
and endow the holy church with your property. We will read 
it, for God forbid that it should be said that the holy church 
received an involuntary gift.” 

“ I will sign it,” replied the dying man ; “ but my sight fails 
me ; be quick, absolve me.” And the paper was signed with 
difficulty as the priests supported the dying man. “ And now 
— absolve me.” 

“ I do absolve thee,” replied the priest, who then went 
through the ceremony. 

“ Now this is a confounded rascally business,” said Jack to 
himself ; who then dropped his cloak, jumped upon the window* 


256 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


sill, opened wide the window-curtains with both hands, and 
uttered a yelling kind of “ ha 1 ha ! ha 1 ha !” 

The priests turned round, saw the demon, as they imagined — 
dropped the paper on the table, and threw themselves with 
their faces on the floor. 

“ Exordso te” stammered one. 

“Ha ! ha ! ha ! ha I” repeated Jack, entering the room, 
and taking up the paper, which he burnt by the flame of the 
candle. Our hero looked at the old man on the bed ; his jaw 
had fallen, his eyes were turned. He was dead. Jack then 
gave one more “ ha ! ha ! ha ! ha !” to keep the priests in 
their places, blew out the candles, made a spring out of the 
window, caught up his cloak, and disappeared as fast as his 
legs could carry him. 

Jack ran until he was out of breath, and then he stopped, 
and sat down by the side of the road. It was broad moon- 
light, and Jack knew not where he was : “ but Minorca has 
not many high roads,” thought Jack, “and I shall find my way 
home. Now, let me see, — I have done some good this evening. 
I have prevented those rogues from disinheriting a family. I 
wonder who they are ; they ought to be infinitely obliged to 
me. But if the priests find me out, what shall I do ? I never 
dare come on shore again — they’d have me in the inquisition. 
I wonder where I am,” said Jack ; “I will get on that hill, 
and see if I can take a departure.” 

The hill was formed by the road being cut perpendicularly 
almost through it, and was, perhaps, some twelve or fourteen 
feet high. Jack ascended it, and looked about him. “ There 
i9 the sea, at all events, with the full moon silvering the waves,” 
said Jack, turning from the road, “ and here is the road ; then 
that must be the way to Port Mahon. But what comes here 1 
—it’s a carriage. Why, it’s the yellow carriage of that old 
lady with her diamonds, and her two splashy footmen !” Jack 
was watching it as it passed the road under him, when, of a 
sudden, he perceived about a dozen men rush out, and seize the 
horses’ heads, — a discharge of fire-arms, the coachman dropped 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


251 


off the box, and the two footmen dropped from behind. The 
robbers then opened the door, and were hauling out the fat 
old lady covered with diamonds. Jack thought a second — it 
occurred to him, that, although he could not cope with so 
many, he might frighten them, as he had frightened one set of 
robbers already that night. The old lady had just been turn 
bled out of the carriage door, like a large bundle of clothes tieu 
up for the wash, when Jack, throwing off his cloak, and 
advancing to the edge of the precipice, with the full moon 
behind him throwing out his figure in strong relief, raised his 
trident, and just as they were raising their knives, yelled a 
most unearthy “ ha, ha, ha, ha !” The robbers looked up, and 
forgetting the masquerade, for there is a double tremor in 
guilt, screamed with fear ; most of them ran away, and dropped 
after a hundred yards ; others remained paralyzed and insensi- 
ble. Jack descended the hill, went to the assistance of the old 
lafcfy, who had swooned, and had to put her into the carriage ; 
but although our hero was very strong, this was a work of no 
small difficulty. After one or two attempts, he lowered down 
the steps, aud contrived to bump her on the first, from the first 
he purchased her on the second, and from the second he at last 
seated her at the door of the carriage. Jack had no time to 
be over-polite. He then threw her back into the bottom of 
the carriage, her heels went up to the top, J ack shoved in her 
petticoats as fast as he could, for decency, and then shutting 
the door, seized the reins, and jumped upon the box. “ I don’t 
know the way,” thought Jack, “ but we must needs go when 
the devil drives so sticking his trident into the horses, they 
set off at a rattling pace, passing over the bodies of the two 
robbers, w r ho had held the reins, and who both lay before him 
in a swoon. As soon as he had brought the horses into a trot, 
he slackened the reins, for, as Jack wisely argued, they will be 
certain to go home if I let them have their own way. The 
horses, before they arrived at the town, turned off, and stopped 
at a large country house. That he might not frighten the 
people, Jack had put on his cloak, and taken off his mask and 


258 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


head-piece, which he had laid beside him on the box. At the 
sound of the carriage wheels the servants came out, when Jack, 
in few words, told them what had happened. Some of the 
servants ran in, and a young lady made her appearance, while 
the others were helping the old lady out of the carriage, who 
had recovered her senses, but had been so much frightened that 
she had remained in the posture in which Jack had put her. 

As soon as she was out, Jack descended from the coach-box 
and entered the house. He stated to the young lady what 
had taken place, and how opportunely he had frightened away 
the robbers, just as they were about to murder her relation ; 
and also suggested the propriety of sending after the servants 
who had fallen in the attack, wffiich was immediately done by a 
strong and well-armed party collected for the occasion. Jack 
having made his speech, made a very polite bow and took his 
leave, stating that he was an English officer, belonging to a 
frigate in the harbour. He knew his w'ay back, and in half an 
hour was again at the inn, and found his comrades. Jack 
thought it advisable to keep his own secret, and therefore 
merely said, that he had taken a long walk in the country ; 
and soon afterwards went to bed. 

The next morning our hero, who was always a man of his 
word, packed up his portmanteau, and paid his bill. He had 
just completed this heavy operation, when somebody wanted to 
speak to him, and a sort of half-clerical, half-legal sort of look- 
ing gentleman was introduced, who, with a starched face and 
prim air, said that he came to request in writing the name of 
the officer who was dressed as a devil, in the masquerade of the 
night before. 

Jack looked at his interrogator, and thought of the priests 
and the inquisition. “ No, no,” thought he, “ that won’t do ; 
a name I must give, but it shall be one that you dare not med- 
dle with. A midshipman you might get hold of, but it’s more 
than the whole island dare to touch a post-captain of one of 
his majesty’s frigates.” So Jack took the paper and wrote 
Captain Henry Wilson, of his majesty’s ship Aurora. 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


25S 


The prim man made a prim bow, folded up the paper, and 
left the room. 

Jack threw the waiter half a doubloon, lighted his cigar 
and went on board. 


CHAPTER XXV. 

IN WHICH THE OLD PROVERB IS ILLUSTRATED, 11 THAT YOU MUST 
NOT COUNT YOUR CHICKENS BEFORE THEY ARE HATCHED.” 

The first-lieutenant of the Aurora was a very good officer in 
many respects, but, as a midshipman, he had contracted the 
habit of putting his hands in his pockets, and could never keep 
them out, even when the ship was in a gale of wind ; and 
hands are of some use in a heavy lurch. He had more than 
once received serious injury from falling on these occasions, but 
habit was too powerful ; and, although he had once broken his 
leg by falling down the hatchway, and had, moreover, a large 
scar on his forehead, received from being thrown to leeward 
against one of the guns, he still continued the practice ; indeed, 
it was said that once, when it was necessary for him to go 
aloft, he had actually taken the two first rounds of the Jacob’s 
ladder without withdrawing them, until, losing his balance, he 
discovered that it was not quite so easy to go aloft with his 
hands in his pockets. In fact, there was no getting up his 
hands, even when all hands were turned up. He had another 
peculiarity, which was, that he had taken a peculiar fancy to a 
quack medicine, called Enouy’s Universal Medicine for all Man- 
kind ; and Mr. Pottyfar was convinced in his own mind that 
the label was no libel, except from the greatness of its truth. 
In his opinion, it cured every thing, and he spent one of his 
quarterly bills every year in bottles of this stuff ; which he not 
only took himself every time he was unwell, but occasionally 
when quite well, to prevent his falling sick. He recommended 


260 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY 


it to every body in the ship, and nothing pleased him so much 
as to give a dose of it to every one who could be persuaded to 
take it. The officers laughed at him, but it was generally 
behind his back, for he became very angry if contradicted upon 
this one point, upon which he certainly might be considered to 
be a little cracked. He was indefatigable in making proselytes 
to his creed, and expatiated upon the virtues of the medicine 
for an hour running, proving the truth of his assertions by a 
pamphlet, which, with his hands, he always carried in his 
trousers’ pocket. 

Jack reported himself when he came on board, and Mr. 
Pottyfar, who was on the quarter-deck at the time, expressed 
a hope that Mr. Easy would take his share of the duty, now 
that he had had such a spell on shore ; to which Jack very gra- 
ciously acceded, and then went down below, where he found 
Gascoigne and his new messmates, with most of whom he was 
already acquainted. 

“Well, Easy,” said Gascoigne, “have you had enough of 
the shore ?” 

“ Quite,” replied Jack, recollecting that, after the events of 
the night before, he was just as well on board ; “ I don’t intend 
to ask for any more leave.” 

“ Perhaps it’s quite as well, for Mr. Pottyfar is not very 
liberal on that score, I can tell you ; there is but one way of 
getting leave from him.” 

“ Indeed,” replied Jack ; “ and what is that ?” 

“You must pretend that you are not well, take some of his 
quack medicine, and then he will allow you a run on shore to 
work it off.” 

“ Oh ! that’s it, is it? well then, as soon as we anchor in 
Valette, I’ll go through a regular course, but not till then.” 

“ It ought to suit you, Jack ; it’s an equality medicine ; 
cures one disorder just as well as the other.” 

“ Or kills — which levels all the patients. You’re right, 
Gascoigne, I must patronise that stuff — for more reasons than 
one. Who was that person on deck in mufti ?” 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY 


261 


“ The mufti, Jack ; in other words the chaplain of the ship , 
but he’s a prime sailor, nevertheless.” 

“ How’s that ?” 

“ Why, he was brought up on the quarter-deck, served his 
time, was acting-lieutenant for two years, and then, somehow 
or another, he bore up for the church.” 

- “ Indeed — what where his reasons ?” 

“No one knows — but they say he has been unhappy ever 
since.” 

“ Why so ?” 

“ Because he did a very foolish thing, which cannot now be 
remedied. He supposed at the time that he would make a 
good parson, and now that he has long got over his fit, he 
finds himself wholly unfit for it — he is still the officer in heart, 
and is always struggling with his natural bent, which is very 
contrary to what a parson should feel.” 

“ Why don’t they allow parsons to be broke by a court- 
martial, and turned out of the service, or to resign their com- 
missions, like other people ?” 

“ It won’t do, Jack — they serve Heaven — there’s a differ- 
ence between that and serving his majesty.” 

“Well, I don’t understand these things. When do we 
sail ?” 

“ The day after to-morrow.” 

“ To join the fleet off Toulon ?” 

“ Yes ; but I suppose we shall be driven on the Spanish 
coast going there. I never knew a mafl-of-war that was not.” 

“No ; wind always blows from the south, going up the 
Mediterranean.” 

“ Perhaps you’ll take another prize, Jack — mind you don’t 
go away without the articles of war.” 

“ I won’t go away without Mesty, if I can help it. 0 dear, 
how abominable a midshipman’s berth is after a long run on 
shore I I positively must go on deck and look at the shore, if 
I can do nothing else.” 

“ Why, ten minutes ago you had had enough of it ?” 


262 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


“ Yes, but ten minutes here has made me feel quite sick. I 
shall go to the first-lieutenant for a dose.” 

“ I say, Easy, we must both be physicked on the same day.” 

“ To be sure ; but stop till we get to Malta.” 

Jack went on deck, made acquaintance with the chaplain 
and some of the officers whom he had not known, then climbed 
up into the maintop, where he took a seat on the armolest, and, 
as he looked at the shore, thought over the events that had 
passed, until Agnes came to his memory, and he thought only 
of her. When a mid is in love, he always goes aloft to think 
of the object of his affection ; why, I don’t know, except that 
his reverie is not so likely to be disturbed by an order from a 
superior officer. 

The Aurora sailed on the second day, and with a fine breeze, 
stood across, making as much northing as easting ; the conse- 
quence was, that one fine morning they saw the Spanish coast 
before they saw the Toulon fleet. Mr. Pottyfar took his hands 
out of his pocket, because he could not examine the coast 
through a telescope without so doing ; but this, it is said, was 
the first time that he had done so on the quarter-deck from the 
day that the ship had sailed from Port Mahon. Captain Wil- 
son was also occupied with his telescope, so were many of the 
officers and midshipmen, and the men at the mast-heads used 
their eyes, but there was nothing but a few small fishing-boats 
to be seen. So they all went down to breakfast, as the ship 
was hove-to close in with the land. 

“What will Easy bet,” said one of the midshipmen, “that 
we don’t see a prize to-day ?” 

“ I will not bet that we do not see a vessel — but Pll bet you 
what you- please, that we do not take one before twelve o’clock 
at night.” 

“ No, no, that won’t do— just let the tea-pot travel over this 
way, for it’s my forenoon watch.” 

“ It’s a fine morning,” observed one of the mates, of the 
name of Martin ; “ but I’ve a notion it won t be a fine even- 
i“g” 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


263 


“ Why not ?” inquired another. 

“ I’ve now been eight years in the Mediterranean, and know 
something about the weather. There’s a watery sky, and the 
wind is very steady. If we are not under double-reefed top- 
sails to-night, say I’m no conjuror.” 

“That you will be, all the same, if we are under bare poles,” 
said another. 

“You’re devilish free with your tongue, my youngster, — 
Easy, pull his ears for me.” 

“ Pull them easy, Jack, then,” said the boy, laughing. 

“ All hands make sail 1” now resounded at the hatchways. 

“ There they are, depend upon it,” cried Gascoigne, catching 
up his hat and bolting out of the berth, followed by all the 
others except Martin, who had just been relieved, and thought 
that his presence in the waist might be dispensed with for the 
short time, at least, which it took him to swallow a cup of 
tea. 

It was very true ; a galliot and four latteen vessels had just 
made their appearance round the easternmost point, and, as 
soon as they observed the frigate, had hauled their wind. In a 
minute the Aurora was under a press of canvas, and the tele- 
scopes were all directed to the vessels. 

All deeply laden, sir,” observed Mr. Hawkins, the chaplain ; 
“ how the topsail of the galliot is scored !” 

“ They have a fresh breeze just now,” observed Captain Wil- 
son to the first lieutenant. 

“ Yes, sir, and it’s coming down fast.” 

“ Hands by the royal halyards, there.” 

The Aurora careened with the canvas to the rapidly increas- 
ing breeze. 

“ Top-gallant sheet and halyards.” 

“ Luff you may, quarter-master ; luff, I tell you. A small 
pull of that weather maintop-gallant brace — that will do,” said 
the master. 

“ Top-men aloft there ; — stand by to clue up the royals — > 
and, Captain Wilson, shall we take them in ? — I’m afraid of 


264 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


that pole — it bends now like a coach-whip,” said Mr. Pottyfar 
looking up aloft, with his hands in both pockets. 

“ In royals — lower away.” 

“ They are going about, sir,” said the second-lieutenant, Mr 
Haswell. 

“ Look out,” observed the chaplain, “ it’s coming.” 

Again the breeze increases, and the frigate was borne down. 

“ Hands reef topsails in stays, Mr. Pottyfar.” 

“ Ay, ay, sir — ’bout ship.” 

The helm was put down and the topsails lowered and reefed 
in stays. 

“ Very well, my lads, very welMndeed,” said Captain Wil- 
son. 

Again the topsails were hoisted and top-gallant sheets home. 
It was a strong breeze, although the water was smooth, and 
the Aurora dashed through at the rate of eight miles an hour, 
with her weather leeches lifting. 

“ Didn’t I tell you so ?” said Martin to his messmates on the 
gangway ; “ but there’s more yet, my boys.” 

“We must take the top-gallant sails off her,” said Captain 
Wilson, looking aloft — for the frigate now careened to her 
bearings, and the wind was increasing and squally. “ Try them 
a little longer but another squall came suddenly — the hal- 
yards were lowered, and the sails clewed up and furled. 

In the mean time the frigate had rapidly gained upon the 
vessels, which still carried on every stitch of canvas, making 
short tacks in shore. The Aurora was again put about with 
her head towards them, and they were not two points on her 
weather bow. The sky, which had been clear in the morning, 
was now overcast, the sun was obscured with opaque white 
clouds, and the sea was rising fast. Another ten minutes, and 
then they were under double-reefed topsails, and the squalls 
were accompanied with heavy rain. The frigate now dashed 
through the waves, foaming in her course and straining under 
the press of sail. The horizon was so thick that the vessels 
ahead were no longer to be seen. 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


265 


“Wo shall have it, I expect,” said Captain Wilson. 

“ Didn’t I say so ?” observed Martin to Gascoigne. “We 
take no prizes this day, depend upon it.” 

“We must have another hand to the wheel, sir, if you 
please,” said the quarter-master, who was assisting the helms- 
man. 

Mr. Pottyfar, with his hands concealed as usual, stood by 
the capstern. “ I fear, sir, we cannot carry the mainsail much 
longer.” 

“ No,” observed the chaplain, “ I was thinking so.” 

“ Captain Wilson, if you please, we are very close in,” said 
the master ; “ don’t you think we had better go about ?” 

“Yes, Mr. Jones. Hands about ship — and — yes, by heavens, 
we must ! up mainsail.” 

The mainsail was taken off, and the frigate appeared to be 
immediately relieved. She no longer jerked and plunged as 
before. 

“ We’re very near the land, Captain Wilson ; thick as it is, 
I think I can make out the loom of it — shall we wear round, 
sir ?” continued the master. 

“ Yes, hands wear ship — put the helm up.” 

It was but just in time, for, as the frigate flew round, describ- 
ing a circle, as she payed off before the wind, they could per- 
ceive the breakers lashing the precipitous coast, not two cables’ 
length from them. 

“ I had no idea we were so near,” observed the captain, 
compressing his lips — “ can they see any thing of those ves- 
sels ?” 

“ I have not seen them this quarter of an hour, sir,” replied 
the signal-man, protecting his glass from the rain under his 
jacket. 

“ How’s her head now, quarter-master ?” 

“ South south-east, sir.” 

The sky now assumed a different appearance — the white 
clouds had been exchanged for others dark and miirky ? the 
wind roared at intervals, and the rain came down in torrents. 

12 


266 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


Captain Wilson went down into the cabin to examine the baro- 
meter. 

“ The barometer has risen,” said he on his return on deck 
“ Is the wind steady ?” 

“ No, sir, she’s up and off three points.” 

“ This will end in a south-wester.” 

The wet and heavy sails now flapped from the shifting of the 
wind. 

“ Up with the helm, quarter-master.” 

“ Up it is — she’s off to south-by-west.” 

The wind lulled, the rain came down in a deluge — for a 
minute it was quite calm, and the frigate was on an even keel. 

“ Man the braces. We shall be taken aback, directly, depend 
upon it.” 

The braces were hardly stretched along before this was the 
case. The wind flew round to the south-west with a loud roar, 
and it was fortunate that they were prepared — the yards were 
braced round, and the master asked the captain what course 
they were to steer. 

“We must give it up,” observed Captain Wilson, holding on 
by the belaying pin. “ Shape our course for Cape Sicie, Mr. 
Jones.” 

And the Aurora flew before the gale, under her foresail and 
topsails close reefed. The weather was now so fhick that 
nothing could be observed twenty yards from the vessel ; the 
thunder pealed, and the lightning darted in every direction over 
the dark expanse. The watch was called as soon as the sails 
were trimmed, and all who could went below, wet, uncomfort- 
able, and disappointed. 

“What an old Jonah you are, Martin,” said Gascoigne. 

“ Yes, I am,” replied he ; “ but we have the worst to come 
yet, in my opinion. I recollect, not two hundred miles from 
where we are now, we had just such a gale in the Favourite, 
and we as nearly went down, when ” * 

At this moment a tremendous noise was heard above, a 
shock was felt throughout the whole ship, which trembled fore 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


261 


and aft as if it was about to fall into pieces ; loud shrieks were 
followed by plaintive cries, the lower deck was filled with 
smoke, and the frigate was down on her beam ends. Without 
exchanging a word, the whole of the occupants of the berth 
flew out, and were up the hatchway, not knowing what to 
think, but convinced that some dreadful accident had taken 
place. 

On their gaining the deck it was at once explained ; the 
foremast of the frigate had been struck by lightning, had been 
riven into several pieces, and had fallen over the larboard bow, 
carrying with it the main topmast and jib-boom. The jagged 
stump of the foremast was in flames, and burnt brightly, not- 
withstanding the rain fell in torrents. The ship, as soon as the 
foremast and main topmast had gone overboard, broached-to 
furiously, throwing the men over the wheel and dashing them 
senseless against the carronades ; the fore castle, the fore part 
of the main deck, and even the lower deck, were spread with 
men, either killed or seriously wounded, or insensible from the 
electric shock. The frigate was on her beam ends, and the sea 
broke furiously over her ; all was dark as pitch, except the 
light from the blazing stump of the foremast, appearing like a 
torch, held up by the wild demons of the storm, or when 
occasionally the gleaming lightning cast a momentary glare, 
threatening every moment to repeat its attack upon the vessel, 
while the deafening thunder burst almost on their devoted 
heads. All was dismay and confusion for a minute or two : at 
last Captain Wilson, who had himself lost his sight for a short 
time, called for the carpenter and axes. They climbed up, that 
is, two or three of them, and he pointed to the mizen-mast; the 
master was also there, and he cut loose the axes for the seamen 
to use ; in a few minutes the mizen-mast fell over the quarter, 
and the helm being put hard up, the frigate payed off and 
slowly righted. But the horror of the scene was not yet over. 
The boatswain, who had been on the forecastle, had been led 
below, for 1ms vision was gone for ever. The men who lay scat- 
tered about had been examined, and they were assisting them 


268 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


down to the care of the surgeon, when the cry of “ Fire 1” 
issued from the lower deck. The ship had taken fire at the 
coal-hole and carpenter’s store-room, and the smoke that now 
ascended was intense. 

“ Call the drummer,” said Captain Wilson, “ and let him 
beat to quarters — all hands to their stations — let the pumps be 
rigged and the buckets passed along. Mr. Martin, see that 
the wounded men are taken down below. Where’s Mr. Has- 
well ? Mr. Potty far, station the men to pass the water on by 
hand on the lower deck. I will go there myself. Mr. J ones, 
take charge of the ship.” 

Pottyfar, who actually had taken his hands out of his pockets, 
hastened down to comply with the captain’s orders on the main 
deck, as Captain Wilson descended to the deck below. 

“ I say, Jack, this is very different from this morning,” ob- 
served Gascoigne. 

“ Yes,” replied Jack, “ so it is : but I say, Gascoigne, what’s 
the best thing to do ? — when the chimney’s on fire on shore, 
they put a wet blanket over it.” 

“ Yes,” replied Gascoigne, “ but when the coal-hole’s on fire 
on board, they will not find that sufficient.” 

“ At all events, wet blankets must be a good thing Ned, so 
let us pull out the hammocks ; cut the lanyards and get some 
out — we can but offer them, yon know, and if they do no good, 
at least it will show our zeal.” 

“Yes, Jack, and I think when they turn in again, those 
whose blankets you will take will agree with you, that zeal 
makes the service very uncomfortable. However, I think you 
are right.” 

The two midshipmen collected three or four hands, and in a 
very short time they had more blankets than they could carry 
—there was no trouble in wetting them, for the main deck was 
afloat — and followed by the men they had collected, Easy and 
Gascoigne went down with large bundles in their arms to where 
Captain Wilson was giving directions to the men. 

“ Excellent. Mr. Easy 1 excellent, Mr. Gascoigne 1” sail 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


269 


Captain Wilson. 11 Come, my lads, throw them over’ now, 
and stamp upon them well the men’s jackets and the captain’s 
coat had already been sacrificed to the same object. 

Easy called the other midshipmen, and they went up for a 
further supply ; but there was no occasion, the fire had been 
smothered ; still the danger had been so great that the fore 
magazine had been floated. During all this, which lasted per- 
haps a quarter of an hour, the frigate had rolled gunwale un- 
der, and many were the accidents which occurred. At last all 
danger from fire had ceased, and the men were ordered to 
return to their quarters, when three officers and forty-seven 
men were found absent — seven of them were dead, most of 
them were already under the care of the surgeon, but some 
were still lying in the scuppers. 

No one had been more active or more brave during this 
time of danger, than Mr. Hawkins the chaplain. He was every- 
where, and when Captain Wilson went down to put out the 
fire he was there, encouraging the men and exerting himself 
most gallantly. He and Mesty came aft when all was over, 
one just as black as the other. The chaplain sat down and 
wrung his hands— “ God forgive me 1” said he, “ God forgive 
me 1” 

“ Why so, sir ?” said Easy, who stood near, “I am sure you 
need not be ashamed of what you have done.” 

“ No, no, not ashamed of what I’ve done $ but, Mr. Easy — 
I have sworn so, sworn such oaths at the men in my haste — I, 
the chaplain ! God forgive me ! — I meant nothing.” It was 
very true that Mr. Hawkins had sworn a great deal during his 
exertions, but he was at that time the quarter-deck officer and 
not the chaplain ; the example to the men and his gallantry 
had been most serviceable, 

“Indeed, sir,” said Easy, who saw that the chaplain was in 
great tribulation, and hoped to pacify him, “ I was certainly 
not there all the time, but I only heard you say, 1 God bless 
you my men l be smart,’ and so on ; surely, that is not swear* 
ing.” 


2'JO 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


“Was it that I said, Mr. Easy, are you sure ? I really had 
an idea that I had d — d them all in heaps, as some of them 
deserved — no no, not deserved. Did I really bless them — 
nothing but bless them ?” 

“ Yes, sir,” said Mesty, who perceived what Jack wanted ; 
“ it was nothing, I assure you, but ‘ God bless you, Captain 
Wilson ! — Bless your heart, my good men ! — Bless the king V 
and so on. You do nothing but shower down blessing and wet 
blanket.” 

“ I told you so,” said Jack. 

“Well, Mr. Easy, you’ve made me very happy,” replied the 
chaplain ; “ I was afraid it was otherwise.” 

So indeed it was, for the chaplain had sworn like a boat- 
swain ; but as Jack and Mesty had turned all his curses into 
blessings, the poor man gave himself absolution, and shaking 
hands with Jack, hoped he would come down into the gun- 
room and take a glass of grog ; nor did he forget Mesty, who 
received a good allowance at the gun-room door, to which Jack 
gladly consented, as the rum in the middy’s berth had all been 
exhausted after the rainy morning — but J ack was interrupted 
in his third glass, by somebody telling him the captain wanted 
to speak with Mr. Hawkins and with him. 

Jack went up, and found the captain on the quarter-deck 
with the officers. 

“ Mr. Easy,” said Captain Wilson, “ I have sent for you, Mr. 
Hawkins, and Mr. Gascoigne, to thank you on the quarter- 
deck, for your exertions and presence of mind on this trying 
occasion.” Mr. Hawkins made a bow. Gascoigne said noth- 
ing, but he thought of having extra leave when they arrived 
at Malta. Jack felt inclined to make a speech, and began 
something about when there was danger that it levelled every 
one to an equality even on board of a man-of-war. 

“ By no means, Mr. Easy,” replied Captain Wilson, “ it does 
the very contrary, for it proves which is the best man, and 
those who are the best raise themselves at once above the 
rest.” 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


211 


Jack was very muck inclined to argue the point, but he took 
the compliment and held his tongue, which was the wisest thing 
he could have done ; so he made his bow, and was about to go 
down into the midshipmen’s berth ivhen the frigate was pooped 
by a tremendous sea, which washed all those who did not hold 
on down into the waist. Jack was among the number, and 
naturally catching at the first object which touched him, he 
caught hold of the chaplain by the leg, who commenced swear- 
ing most terribly, but before he could finish the oath, the water 
which had burst in the cabin through the windows — for the 
dead lights, in the confusion had not yet been shipped — burst 
out the cross bulkheads, sweeping like a torrent the marine, 
the cabin-door, and every thing else in its force, and floating 
Jack and the chaplain with several others down the maiu 
hatchway on to the lower deck. The lower deck being also 
full of water, men and chests were railing and tossing about, 
and Jack was sometimes in company with the chaplain, and at 
other times separated ; at last they both recovered their legs, 
and gained the midshipmen’s berth, which, although afloat, was 
still a haven of security. Mr. Hawkins spluttered and spit, 
and so did Jack, until he began to laugh. 

“ This is very trying, Mr. Easy,” said the chaplain ; “ very 
trying indeed to the temper. I hope I have not sworn — I hope 
not.” 

“ Not a word,'' said Jack — “ I was close to you all the time 
— you only said, ‘ God preserve us I” 

“ Only that ? I was afraid that I said 1 God d — n it !’ ” 

“ Quite a mistake, ‘Mr. Hawkins. Let’s go into the gun- 
room, and try to wash this salt water out of our mouths, and 
then I will tell you all you said, as far as I could hear it, word 
for word.” 

So J ack by this means got another glass of grog, which was 
very acceptable in his wet condition, and made himself very 
comfortable, while those on deck were putting on the dead 
lights, and very busy setting the goose-wings of the mainsail, to 
prevent the frigate from being pooped a second time. 


2?2 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


CHAPTER XXYI. * 

IN WHICH OUR HERO BECOMES EXCESSIVELY UNWELL, AND AGREES 
TO GO THROUGH A COURSE OF MEDICINE. 

The hammocks were not piped down that night ; some were 
taken indiscriminately for the wounded, but the rest remained 
in the nettings, for all hands were busy preparing jury masts 
and jury rigging, and Mr. Pottyfar was so well employed that 
for twelve hours his hands were not in his pockets. It was 
indeed a dreadful night : the waves were mountains high, and 
chased the frigate in their fury, cresting, breaking, and roaring 
at her taffrail ; but she flew before them with the wings of the 
wind ; four men at the helm, assisted by others at the relieving 
tackles below. Jack, having been thanked on and washed off 
the quarter-deck, thought that he had done quite enough ; he 
was as deep as he could swim, before he had satisfied all the 
scruples of the chaplain, and stowing himself away on one of 
the lockers of the midshipmen’s berth, was soon fast asleep, not- 
withstanding that the frigate rolled gunwale under. Gascoigne 
had done much better ; he had taken down a hammock, as he 
said, for a poor wounded man, hung it up, and turned in him- 
self. The consequence was, that the next morning the surgeon, 
who saw him lying in the hammock, had put him down in the 
report, but as Gascoigne had got up as well as ever, 
he laughed, and scratched his name out of the list of 
wounded. 

Before morning, the ship had been pumped out dry, and all 
below made as secure and safe as circumstances would permit ; 
but the gale still continued its violence, and there was anything 
but comfort on board. 

“ I say, Martin, you ought to be thrown overboard,” said 
Gascoigne ; “all this comes from your croaking — you’re a 
Mother Cary’s chicken.” 

“I wish I had been any* one’s chicken,” replied Martin ; “but 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


273 


the devil a thing to nestle under have J had sinco I can well 
remember.” 

“ What a bore to have no galley fire lighted,” said One of 
the youngsters, “ no tea, and not allowed any grog.” 

“ The gale will last three days,” replied Martin, “ and by 
that time we shall not be far from the admiral ; it won’t blow 
home there.” 

“ Well, then, we shall be ordered in directly, and I shall go 
on shore to-morrow,” replied Easy. 

“Yes, if you’re ill,” replied Gascoigne. 

“ Never fear, I shall be sick enough ; we shall be there at 
least six weeks, and then we’ll forget all this.” 

“ Yes,” replied Martin, “ we may forget it, but will the poor 
fellows whose limbs are shrivelled forget it ? and will poor 
Miles, the boatswain, who is blind for ever ?” 

“Very true, Martin, we are thinking about ourselves, not 
thankful for our escape, and not feeling for others,” replied 
Gascoigne. 

“ Give us your hand, Ned,” said Jack Easy. “ And, Martin, 
we ought to thank you for telling us the truth — we are a selfish 
set of fellows.” 

“ Still we took our share with the others,” replied one of the 
midshipmen. 

“ That’s more reason for us to be grateful and to pity them,” 
replied Jack : “ suppose you had lost your arm or your eye- 
sight — we should have pitied you ; so now pity others.” 

“ Well, so I do, now I think of it.” 

“ Think oftener, youngster,” observed Martin, going ol 
deck. 

What a change from the morning of the day before ! — but 
twenty-four hours had passed away, and the sea had 'been 
smooth, the frigate dashed through the blue water, proud, in 
all her canvas, graceful as a swan. Since that, there had 
had been fire, tempest, lightning, disaster, danger, and death ; 
her masts were tossed about on the snowy waves hundreds of 
miles away from her — and she, a wreck, was rolling heavily, 


214 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EA3Y. 


groaning and complaining in every timber . as she urged hex 
impetuous race with the furious running sea. 

How wrong are those on shore who assert that sailors are 
not religious ! — how is it possible, supposing them to be pos- 
sessed of feeling, to be otherwise ? On shore, where you have 
nothing but the change of seasons, each in its own peculiar 
beauty — nothing but the blessings of the earth, its fruit, its 
flowers — nothing but the bounty, the comforts, the luxuries 
which have been invented, where you can rise in the morning in 
peace, and lay down your head at night in security — God may 
be neglected and forgotten for a long time ; but at sea, when 
each gale is a warning, each disaster acts as a check, each 
escape as a homily, upon the forbearance of Providence, that 
man must be indeed brutalized who does not feel that God is 
there. On shore we seldom view him but in all his beauty and 
kindness ; but at sea we are as often reminded how terrible he 
is in his wrath. Can it be supposed that the occurrences of the 
last twenty-four hours were lost upon the minds of any one man 
in that ship? No, no. In their courage and activity they 
might appear reckless, but in their hearts they acknowledged 
and bowed unto their God. 

Before the day was over, a jury-foremast had been got up, 
and sail having been put upon it, the ship was steered with 
greater ease and safety — the main brace had been spliced to 
cheer up the exhausted crew, and the hammocks were piped 
down. 

As Gascoigne had observed, some of the men were not very 
much pleased to find that they were minus their blankets, but 
Captain Wilson ordered their losses to be supplied by the 
purser and expended by the master : this quite altered the 
case, as they obtained new blankets, in most cases, for old ones, 
but still it was impossible to light the galley fire, and the men 
sat on their chests and nibbled biscuit. By twelve o’clock 
that night the gale broke, and more sail was necessarily put on 
the scudding vessel, for the sea still ran fast and mountains 
high. At daylight the sun burst out and shone brightly on 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


215 


them, the sea went gradually down, the fire was lighted, and 
Mr. Pottyfar, whose hands were again in his pockets, at twelve 
o’clock gave the welcome order to pipe to dinner. As soon as 
the men had eaten their dinner, the frigate was once more 
brought to the wind, her jury-mast forward improved upon, and 
more sail made upon it. The next morning there was nothing 
of the gale left except the dire effects which it had produced, 
the black and riven stump of the foremast still holding up a 
terrific warning of the power and fury of the elements. 

Three days more, and the Aurora joined the Toulon fleet. 
When she was first seen,' it was imagined by those on board of 
the other ships that she had been in action, but they soon learnt 
that the conflict had been against more direful weapons than 
any yet invented by mortal hands. Captain Wilson waited 
upon the admiral, and of course received immediate orders to 
repair to port, and refit. In a few hours the Aurora had 
shaped her course for Malta, and by sunset the Toulon fleet 
were no longer in sight. 

“By de holy poker, Massa Easy, but that terrible sort of 
gale the othef day, any how — I tink one time we all go to 
Davy Joney’s locker.” 

“Very true, Mesty ; I hope never to meet with such 
another.” 

“ Den, Massa Easy, why you go to sea ? When man ab no 
money, noting to eat, den he go to sea, but every body say you 
ab plenty money — why you come to sea ?” 

“I’m sure I don’t know,” replied Jack, thoughtfully; “I 
came to sea on account of equality and the rights of man.” 

“ Eh, Massa Easy, you come to wrong place any how ; now 
I tink a good deal lately, and by all de power, I tink equality 
all stuff.” 

“ All stuff, Mesty, why ? you used to think otherwise.” 

“ Yes, Massa Easy, but den I boil de kettle for all young 
gentlemen. Now, dat I ship’s corporal and hab cane, I tink so 
no longer.” 

Jack made no reply, but he thought the more. The reader 


276 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


must have perceived that Jack’s notions of equality were 
rapidly disappearing ; he defended them more from habit, and 
perhaps a wilfulness which would not allow him to acknowledge 
himself wrong ; to which may be added, his love of argument. 
Already he had accustomed himself to obedience to his supe- 
riors, and, notwithstanding his arguments, he would admit of 
no resistance from those below him ; not that it was hardly 
ever attempted, for Jack was anything but a tyrant, and was 
much beloved by all in the ship. Every day brought its 
lesson, and Captain Wilson was now satisfied that Jack had 
been almost cured of the effects of his father’s ridiculous 
philosophy. 

After a few minutes, Mesty tapped his cane on the funne^ 
and re-commenced. 

“ Then, why you stay at sea, Massa Easy ?” 

“ I don’t know, Mesty ; I don’t dislike it.” 

“ But, Massa Easy, why you stay in midshipman’s berth — 
eat hard biscuit, salt pig, salt horse, when you can go shore, 
and live like gentleman? Dat very foolish 1 Why not be 
your own master ? By all power ! suppose I had money, 
catch me board ship. Little sea very good, Massa Easy — 
open one eyes ; but tink of the lightning t’other night : poor 
massa boatswain, he shut um eyes for ebber 1” 

“Very true, Mesty.” 

“ Me hope you tink of this, sar, and when you go on shore, 
you take Mesty wid you ; he sarve you well, Massa Easy, Jong 
as he live, by de holy St. Patrick. And den, Massa Easy, you 
marry wife — hab pickaninny — lib like gentleman. You tink 
of this, Massa Easy.” 

The mention of the word marriage turned the thoughts of 
our hero to his Agnes, and he made no reply. Mesty walked 
away, leaving our hero in deep thought. 

This conversation had more effect upon Jack than would 
have been imagined, and he very often found he was putting to 
himself the question of Mesty — “ Why do you stay at sea ?” 
He had not entered the service with any particular view, 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EAST. 


277 


except to find equality ; and lie could not but acknowledge to 
himself that, as Mesty observed, he had come to the wrong 
place. He had never even thought of staying to serve his 
time, nor had he looked forward to promotion, and one day 
commanding a ship. He had only cared for the present, with- 
out indulging in a future anticipation of any reward, except in 
a union with Agnes. Mesty’s observations occasioned Jack to 
reflect upon the future for the first time in his life ; and he was 
always perplexed when he put the question of Mesty, and tried 
to answer to himself as to what were his intentions in remaining 
in the service. 

Nevertheless Jack did his duty very much to the satisfaction 
of Mr. Pottyfar; and after a tedious passage, from baffling and 
light winds, the Aurora arrived at Malta. Our hero had had 
some conversation with his friend Gascoigne, in which he can- 
vassed his future plans ; all of which, however, epded in one 
settled point, which was, that he was to marry Agnes. As for 
the rest, Gascoigne was of opinion that Jack ought to follow 
up the service, and become a captain, but there was plenty of 
time to think about that, as he observed, now all they had to 
consider was, how to get on shore ; for the refitting of the 
ship was an excuse for detaining them on board, which they 
knew Mr. Pottyfar would avail himself of. Jack dined in the 
gun-room on the day of their arrival, and he resolved that he 
would ask that very evening. Captain Wilson was already on 
shore at the governor’s. Now, there had been a little diffe- 
rence of opinion between Mr. Pottyfar and Mr. Hawkins, the 
chaplain, on a point of seamanship ; and most of the officers 
sided with the chaplain, who, as we have before observed, was 
a first-rate seaman. It had ended in high words, for Mr. Haw- 
kins had forgotten himself so far as to tell the first-lieutenant 
that he had a great deal to learn, not having even got over tho 
midshipman’s trick of keeping his hands in his pockets ; and 
Mr. Pottyfar had replied that it was very well for him as chap- 
lain to insult others, knowing that his cassock protected him. 
This was a bitter reply to Mr. Hawkins, who at the very time 



218 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


that the insinuation made his blood boil, was also reminded 
that his profession .forbade a retort : he rushed into his cabin, 
poor fellow, having no other method left, vented his indignation 
in tears, and then consoled himself by degrees with prayer. In 
the meantime, Mr. Pottyfar had gone on deck, wroth with 
Hawkins and with his messmates, as well as displeased with 
himself. He was, indeed, in a humour to be pleased with 
nobody, and in a most unfortunate humour to be asked leave 
by a midshipman. Nevertheless, Jack politely took off his hat, 
and requested leave to go on shore and see his friend the gov- 
ernor. Upon which Mr. Pottyfar turned round to him, with 
his feet spread wide open, and thrusting his hands to the very 
bottom of his pockets, as if in determination, said: “ Mr. Easy, 
you know the state of the ship ; we have everything to do — 
new masts — new rigging — everything almost to refit, and yet 
you ask to go on shore ! Now, sir, you may take this answer 
for yourself and all the other midshipmen in the ship, that not 
one soul of you puts his foot on shore until we are again all 
a-taunto.” 

“Allow me to observe, sir,” said our hero, “that it is very 
true that all our services may be required when the duty com- 
mences, but this being Saturday night, and to-morrow Sunday, 
the frigate will not be even moved till Monday morning ; and 
as the work cannot begin before that, I trust you will permit 
leave until that time.” 

“ My opinion is different, sir,” replied the first-lieutenant. 

“ Perhaps, sir, you will allow me to argue the point,” replied 
Jack. 

“ No, sir, I never allow argument ; walk over to the other 
side of the deck, if you please.” 

“ Oh certainly, sir,” said Jack, “ if you wish it.” 

J ack’s first idea was to go on shore without leave, but from 
this he was persuaded by Gascoigne, who told him that it 
would displease Captain Wilson, and that old Tom, the gover- 
nor, would not receive him. Jack agreed to this, and then, 
after a flourish about the rights of man, tyranny, oppression, 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


219 


and so forth, he walked forward to the forecastle, where he 
found his friend Mesty, who had heard all that had passed, 
and who insidiously said to him, in a low tone : 

“ Why you stay at sea, Massa Easy ?” 

“ Why, indeed,” thought Jack, boiling with indignation, “to 
be cooped up here at the will of another ? I am a fool — 
Mesty is right — I’ll ask for my discharge to-morrow.” Jack 
went down below, and told Gascoigne what he had determined 
to do. 

“ You’ll do no such thing, Jack,” replied Gascoigne ; 
“ depend upon it, you’ll have plenty of leave in a day or 
two. Pottyfar was in a pet with the chaplain, who was too 
much for him. Captain Wilson will be on board by nine 
o’clock.” 

Nevertheless, Jack walked his first watch in the “magniji- 
cents ” as all middies do when they cannot go on shore, and 
turned in at twelve o’clock, with the resolution of sticking to 
his purpose, and quitting his majesty’s service ; in fact, in pre- 
senting his majesty with his between two and three years’ time, 
served as midshipman, all free, gratis, and for nothing, except 
his provisions and his pay, which some captains are bold enough 
to assert that they not only are not worth, but not even the salt 
that accompanies it ; forgetting that they were once midship- 
men themselves, and at the period were, of course, of about 
the same value. 

The next morning Captain Wilson came off ; the ship’s 
company were mustered, the service read by Mr. Hawkins, 
and Jack, as soon as all the official duties were over, was about 
to go up to the captain, when the captain said to him : 

u Mr. Easy, the governor desired me to bring you on shore 
to dine with him, and he has a bed at your service.” 

Jack touched his hat and ran down below, to make his few 
preparations. 

By the time that Mesty, who had taken charge of his chest, 
&c., had put his necessaries in the boat, Jack had almost made 
up his mind that his majesty should not be deprived yet awhile 


280 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


of so valuable an officer. Jack returned on deck, and found 
that the captain was not yet ready ; he went up to Mr. 
Pottyfar, and told him that the captain had ordered him to go 
on shore with him ; and Mr. Pottyfar, who had quite got over 
his spleen, said, 

“ Very well, Mr. Easy — I wish you a great deal of pleasure.” 

“ This is very different from yesterday,” thought Jack; “ sup- 
pose I try the medicine ?” 

“ I am not very well, Mr. Pottyfar, and those pills of the 
doctor’s don’t agree with me. I always am ill if I am long 
without air and exercise.” 

“Yery true,” said the first lieutenant, “ people require air 
and exercise. Pve no opinion of the doctor’s remedies; the only 
thing that is worth a farthing is the universal medicine.” 

“ I should so long to try it, sir,” replied Jack; “ I read the 
book, one day, and it said that if you took it daily for a fort- 
night or three weeks, and with plenty of air and exercise, it 
would do wonders.” 

“ And it’s very true,” replied Mr. Pottyfar, “ and if you’d 
like to try it you shall — I have plenty — shall I give you a dose 
now ?” 

“ If you please, sir,” replied Jack; “ and tell me how often I 
am to take it, for my head aches all day.” 

Mr. Pottyfar took Jack down, and putting into his hand 
three or four bottles of the preparation, told him that he was to 
take thirty drops at night, when he went to bed, not to drink 
more than two glasses of wine, and to avoid the heat of the 
sun. 

“ But, sir,” replied Jack, who had put the bottles in his 
pocket, “ I am afraid that I cannot take it long; for as the ship 
is ready for fitting, I shall be exposed to the sun all day.” 

“Yes, if you were wanted, Mr. Easy; but we have plenty 
here without you; and when you are unwell you cannot be ex- 
pected to work. Take care of your health ; and I trust, indeed, 
I am sure, that you will find this medicine wonderfully effica- 
cious.” 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


281 


“ I will begin to-night, sir, if you please,” replied Jack, “ and 
I am very much obliged to you. I sleep at the governor’s — 
shall I come on board to-morrOw morning ?” 

“ No, no; take care of yourself, and get well; I shall be glad 
to hear that you get better. Send me word how it acts.” 

“ I will, sir, send you word by the boat every day,” replied 
Jack, delighted; “I am very much obliged to you, sir. Gas- 
coigne and I were thinking of asking you, but did not like to 
do so : he, poor fellow, suffers from headaches almost as bad as 
I do, and the doctor’s pills are of no use to him.” 

“ He shall have some too, Mr. Easy; I thought he looked 
pale. I’ll see to it this afternoon. Recollect, moderate exer- 
cise, Mr. Easy, and avoid the sun at mid-day.” 

“Yes, sir,” replied Jack, “I’ll not forget;” and off went 
Jack, delighted. He ordered Mesty to put up his whole port- 
manteau instead of the small bundle he put into the boat, and 
telling Gascoigne what a spoke he had put into his wheel, was 
soon in the boat with the captain, and went on shore, where he 
was cordially greeted by the governor. 


CHAPTER XXVII. 

IN WHICH CAPTAIN WILSON IS REPAID WITH INTEREST FOR JACK’S 
BORROWING- HIS NAME; PROVING THAT A GOOD NAME IS AS GOOD 
AS A LEGACY. 

“ Well, Jack, my boy, have you any long story ready for me ?” 
inquired the governor. 

“Yes, sir,” replied Jack, “I have one or two very good 
ones.” 

“ Very well, we’ll hear them after dinner,” replied old Tom. 
“ In the mean time find out your room and take possession.” 

“ That must not be for very long, governor,” observed Cap 


282 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EAST. 


tain Wilson. “ Mr. Easy must learn Ms duty, and there is a 
good opportunity now.” 

“ If you please sir,” replied Jack, “ Pm on the sick list.” 

“ Sick list,” said Captain Wilson : “ you were not in the re- 
port that Mr. Wilson gave me this morning.” 

“ .No, Pm on Mr. Pottyfar’s list; and Pm going through a 
course of the universal medicine.” 

“ What’s all this, Jack — what’s all this ? — there’s some story 
here — don’t be afraid of the captain — you’ve me to back you,” 
said the governor. 

Jack was not at all afraid of the captain, so he told him how 
the first-lieutenant had refused him leave the evening before, 
and how he had now given him permission to remain and try 
the universal medicine, at which the governor laughed heartily, 
nor could Captain Wilson refrain from joining. 

“ But, Mr. Easy,” replied the captain after a pause, “ if Mr. 
Pottyfar will allow you to stay on shore, I cannot — you 
have your duty to learn. You must be aware that now is your 
time, and you must not lose opportunities that do not occur 
every day. You must acknowledge the truth of what I say.” 

“ Yes, sir,” replied Jack, “ I admit it all, provided I do in- 
tend to follow the profession;” and so saying, our hero bowed, 
and left the veranda where they had been talking. 

This hint of Jack’s, thrown out by him more with the inten- 
tion of preventing his being sent on board than with any de- 
finite idea, was not lost upon either the captain or the governor. 

“ Does he jib, then ?” observed the governor. 

“On the contrary, I never knew him more attentive, and so 
entirely getting rid of his former notions. He has behaved 
most nobly in the gale, and there has not been one complaint 
against him — I never was more astonished — he must have 
meant something.” 

“ I’ll tell you what he means, Wilson — that he does not like 
to be sent on board, nothing more. He’s not to be cooped 
up — you may lead him, but not drive him.” 

“Yes, but the service will not admit of it. I never could al- 
% 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


283 


low it — he must do his duty like the rest, and conform to the 
rules.” 

“ Exactly, so he must; but look ye, Wilson, you must not 
loose him : it’s all easily settled — appoint him your orderly 
midshipman to and from the ship ; that will be employment, and 
he can always remain here at night. I will tell him that I have 
asked as a favour, what I now do, and leave me to find out 
what he is thinking about.” 

“ It may be done that way, certainly,” replied Captain Wil- 
son, musing; “and you are more likely to get his intentions 
from him than I am. I am afraid he has too great a command 
of money ever to be fond of the ship; it is the ruin of a junior 
officer to be so lavishly supplied.” 

“ He’s a long way from ruin yet, Wilson — he’s a very fine 
fellow, even by your own acknowledgment. You humoured him 
out of gratitude to his father, when he first came into the ser- 
vice; humour him a little now to keep him in it. Besides, if 
your first-lieutenant is such a fool with his universal medicine, 
can you wonder at a midshipman taking advantage of 
it ?” 

“ No, but I ought not to allow him to do so with my eyes 
open.” 

“ He has made it known to you upon honour, and you ought 
not to take advantage of his confidence : but still what I pro- 
posed would, I think, be the best, for then he will be at his 
duty in a way that will suit all parties. You, because you em- 
ploy him on service — the first-lieutenant, because Jack can 
take his medicine — and Jack, because he can dine with me 
every day.” 

“ Well, I suppose it must be so,” replied Captain Wilson, 
laughing; “ but still, I trust you will discover what is working 
in his mind to induce him to give me that answer, gover- 
nor.” 

“ Never fear, Jack shall confess, and lay his soul as bare as 
that of a Catholic bigot before his padre.” 

The party sat down to dinner, and what with the governor’s 


t 


284 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


aid-de-camp and those invited, it was pretty numerous. After 
the cloth had been removed, the governor called upon Jack 
for his stories, whereupon, much to the surprise of Captain 
Wilson, who had never heard one word of it, for the admiral 
had not mentioned anything about it to him during the short 
time the Aurora was with the Toulon fleet, our hero gave the 
governor and the company the narrative of all that had hap- 
pened in the Eliza Ann transport — the loves of Captain Hogg 
and Miss Hicks — the adventures of Gascoigne — and his plan, 
by which he baulked them all. The governor was delighted, 
and Captain Wilson not a little astonished. 

“ You prevented a very foolish thing, Mr. Easy, and behaved 
very well/’ observed the captain, laughing again at the idea ; 
“but you never told me of all this.” 

“ No, sir,” replied Jack, “ I have always reserved my stories 
for the governor’s table, where I am sure to meet you, and then 
telling once does for all.” 

Jack received his appointment as orderly midshipman, and 
every thing went on well ; for, of his own accord, he stayed on 
board the major part of the day to learn his duty, which very 
much pleased the captain and Mr. Pottyfar. In this Jack 
showed a great deal of good sense, and Captain Wilson did 
not repent of the indulgence he had shown him. Jack’s health 
improved daily, much to Mr. Pottyfar’s satisfaction, who 
imagined that he took the universal medicine night and morn- 
ing. Gascoigne also was a patient under the first-lieutenant’s 
hands, and often on shore with our hero, who thought no more 
of quitting the service. 

Eor seven weeks they had now remained in harbour, for even 
the masts had to be made, when, one day, Captain Wilson 
opened a letter he received at breakfast-time, and having read 
it, laid it down with the greatest surprise depicted in his 
countenance. “ Good heavens ! what can this mean ?” said 
he. 

“ What’s the matter, Wilson ?” said the governor. 

“ Just hear its contents. Sir Thomas ” 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


285 


Captain Wilson then read in Spanish as follows : — 
“Honourable Sir, 

“ It is my duty to advise you that the Honourable 
Lady Signora Alforgas de Guzman, now deceased, has, in her 
testament, bequeathed to you the sum of one thousand doub- 
loons in gold, as a testimony of your kind services on the night 
of the 12th of August. If you will authorise any merchant 
here to receive the money, it shall be paid forthwith, or remit- 
ted in any way you please to appoint. May you live a thou- 
sand years. “ Your most obedient servant, 

“Alfonzo Xerez.” 

Jack heard the letter read, rose quietly, whistled low, as if 
not attending to it, and then slipped out of the room, unper- 
ceived by the governor or Captain Wilson. 

The fact was, that although Jack had longed to tell the gov- 
ernor about his adventures after the masquerade, he did not like 
yet awhile, until he was sure that there were no consequences — 
because he had given the captain’s name instead of his own. 
As soon as he heard the letter read, he at once perceived that 
it had been the old lady, and not the priests, who had made the 
inquiry, and that by giving Captain Wilson’s name, he had 
obtained for him this fine legacy. Jack was delighted, but still 
puzzled, so he walked out of the room to reflect a little. 

“ What can it mean ?” said Captain Wilson. “ I never ren- 
dered any services to any one on the 12th of August or after it. 
It Is some mistake — 12th of August — that was the day of the 
grand masquerade.” 

“ A lucky one for you, at all events — for you know, mistake 
or not, no one else can touch the legacy. It can only be paid 
to you.” 

“ I never heard of any thing taking place at the masquer- 
ade — I was there, but I left early, for I was not very well. 
Mr. Easy,” said Captain Wilson, turning round, but Jack was 
gone. 

“Was he at the masquerade ?” asked the governor. 


286 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


“ Yes, I know lie was, for the first-lieutenant told me that he 
requested not to come on board till the next day.” 

“Depend upon it,” replied the governor, striking his fist 
upon the table, “that Jack’s at the bottom of it.” 

“ I should not be surprised at his being at the bottom of any 
thing,” replied Captain Wilson, laughing. 

“ Leave it to me, Wilson, I’ll find it out.” 

After a little more conversation, Captain Wilson went on 
board, leaving Jack on purpose that the governor might pump 
him. But this Sir Thomas had no occasion to do, for Jack had 
made up his mind to make the governor his confidant, and he 
immediately told him the whole story. The governor held his 
sides at our hero’s description, especially at his ruse of giving 
the captain’s name instead of his own. 

“ You’ll kill me, Jack, before you’ve done with me,” said old 
Tom, at last ; “ but now what is to be done ?” 

Our hero now became grave ; he pointed out to the governor 
that he himself had plenty of money, and would come into a 
large fortune, and that Captain Wilson was poor, with a large 
family. All Jack wished the governor to manage was, that 
Captain Wilson might consent to accept the legacy. 

“ Right, boy, right ! you’re my own boy,” replied the gov- 
ernor ; “ but we must think of this, for Wilson is the very soul 
of honour, and there may be some difficulty about it. You have 
told uobody.” 

“ Not a soul but you, Sir Thomas.” 

“It never will do to tell him all this, Jack, for he would 
insist that the legacy belonged to you.” 

“ I have it, sir,” replied Jack. “ When I was going into the 
masquerade, I offered to hand this very old lady, who was cov- 
ered with diamonds, out of her carriage, and she was so fright- 
ened at my dress of a devil, that she would have fallen down 
had it not been for Captain Wilson, who supported her, and she 
was ver ^ thankful to him.” 

“ You are right, Jack,” replied the governor, after a short 
pause ; “ that will, I think, do. I must tell him the story of 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


m 

the friars, because I swore you had something to do with it — • 
but I’ll tell him no more : leave it all to me.” 

Captain Wilson returned in the afternoon, and found the gov- 
ernor in the veranda. 

“ I have had some talk with young Easy,” said the governor, 
“ and he has told me a strange story about that night, which 
he was afraid to tell to every body.” 

The governor then narrated the history of the friars and the 
wilL 

“Well, but,” observed Captain Wilson, “the history of that 
will afford no clue to the legacy.” 

“No, it does not ; but still, as I said, Jack had a hand in 
this. He frightened the old lady as a devil, and you caught 
her in your arms and saved her from falling ; so he had a hand 
in it, you see.” 

“I do- now remember that I did save a very dowager-like old 
personage from falling at the sight of a devil, who, of course, 
must have been our friend Easy.” 

“Well, and that accounts for the whole of it.” 

“ A thousand doubloons for picking up an old lady 1” 

“ Yes, why not ? — have you not heard of a man having a for- 
tune left him for merely opening the pew door of a church to an 
old gentleman ?” 

“ Yes, but it appears so strange.” 

“ There’s nothing strange in this world, Wilson, nothing at 
all — we may slave for years and get no reward, and do a trifle 
out of politeness and become independent. In my opinion, this 
mystery is unravelled. The old lady, for I knew the family, 
must have died immensely rich : she knew you in your full uni- 
form, and she asked your name ; a heavy fall would have been 
to one so fat a most serious affair ; you saved her, and she has 
rewarded you handsomely.” 

“Well,” replied Captain Wilson, “as I can give no other 
explanation, I suppose yours is the correct one ; but i^’s hardly 
fair to take a thousand doubloons from her relations merely for 
an act of civility.” 


288 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EAST. 


“You really are quite ridiculous ; the old lady owned half 
Murcia, tc my knowledge. It is no more to them than any 
one leaving you a suit of mourning in an English legacy. I 
wish you joy ; it will help you with a large family, and in jus- 
tice to them you are bound to take it. Every body does as he 
pleases with his own money, — depend upon it, you saved her 
from breaking her leg short off at the hip joint.” 

“ Upon that supposition I presume I must accept of the leg- 
acy,” replied Captain Wilson, laughing. 

“ Of course, send for it at once. The rate of exchange is 
now high. I will give you government bills, which will make it 
nearly four thousand pounds.” 

“ Four thousand pounds for preventing an old woman from 
falling,” replied Captain Wilson. 

“Devilish well paid, Wilson, and I congratulate you.” 

“ For how much am I indebted to the father of young Easy t” 
observed Captain Wilson, after a silence of some minutes ; “ if 
he had not assisted me when I was appointed to a ship, I should 
not have gained my promotion — nor three thousand pounds I 
have made in prize money — the command of a fine frigate — 
and now four thousand pounds in a Windfall.” 

The governor thought that he was more indebted to Jack than 
to his father for some of these advantages, but he was careful 
not to point them out. 

“ It’s very true,” observed the governor, “ that Mr. Easy was 
of service to you when you were appointed ; but allow me to 
observe, that for your ship, your prize-money, and for your wind- 
fall, you have been wholly indebted to your own gallantry in 
both senses of the word ; still Mr. Easy is a fine, generous fel- 
low, and so is his son, I can tell you. By-the-bye, I had a long 
conversation with him the other day.” 

“ About himself ?” 

“ Yes, all about himself. He appears to me to have come 
into the service without any particular motive, and will be just 
as likely to leave it in the same way. He appears to be very 
much in love with that Sicilian nobleman’s daughter. I find 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


289 


that he has written to her, and to her brother, since he has 
been here.” 

“ That he came into the service in search of what he never 
will find in this world, I know very well ; and I presume that 
he has found that out — and that he will follow up the service 
is also very doubtful ; but I do not wish that he should leave it 
yet ; it is doing him great good,” replied Captain Wilson. 

“ I agree with you there — I have great influence with him 
and he shall stay yet awhile. He is heir to a very large for- 
tune, is he not ?” 

“ A clear eight thousand pounds a year, if not more.” 

“ If his father dies he must, of course, leave : a midship- 
man with eight thousand pounds a year would indeed be an 
anomaly.” 

“ That the service could not permit. It would be as inju- 
rious to himself as it would to others about him. At present, he 
has almost, indeed, I may say, quite an unlimited command of 
money.” 

“ That’s bad, very bad. I wonder he behaves so well as he 
does.” 

“ And so do I : but he really is a very superior lad, with all his 
peculiarities, and a general favourite with those whose opinions 
and friendship are worth having.” 

“ Well, don’t curb him up too tight — for really he does not. 
require it. He goes very well in a snaffle.” 


IE 


290 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EAST. 


CHAPTER XXVIII. 

“ PHILOSOPHY MADE EASY ” UPON AGRARIAN PRINCIPLES, THE SUB- 
JECT OF SOME UNEASINESS TO OUR HERO. THE FIRST APPEAR- 

ANCE, BUT NOT THE LAST, OF AN IMPORTANT PERSONAGE. 

The conversation was here interrupted by a mail from England 
which they had been expecting. Captain Wilson retired with 
his letters ; the governor remained equally occupied ; and our 
hero received the first letter ever written to him by his father. 
It ran as follows : — 

“ My dear Son, 

“I have many times taken up my pen with the 
intention of letting you know how things went on in this coun- 
try. But as I can perceive around but one dark horizon of evil, 
I have as bften laid it down again without venturing to make 
you unhappy with such bad intelligence. 

“The account of your death, and also of your unexpectedly 
being yet spared to us, were duly received, and I trust I mourned 
and rejoiced on each occasion with all the moderation charac- 
teristic of a philosopher. In the first instance, I consoled my- 
self with the reflection, that the world you had left was in a 
state of slavery and pressed down by the iron arm of despotism., 
and that to die was gain, not only in all the parson tells us, 
but also in our liberty ; and, at the second intelligence, I mo- 
derated my joy for nearly about the same reasons, resolving, 
notwithstanding what Dr. Middleton may say, to die as I have 
lived, a true philosopher. 

“ The more I reflect the more am I convinced that there is 
nothing required to make this world happy but equality, and 
the rights of man being duly observed — in short, that every 
thing and every body should be reduced to one level. Do we 
not observe that it is the law of nature — do not brooks run 
into rivers — rivers into seas — mountains crumble down upon 
the plains ? —are not the seasons contented to equalize the parts 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


291 


of the earth ? Why does the sun run round the ecliptic, in- 
stead of the equator, but to give an equal share of his heat to 
both sides of the world ? Are we not all equally born in 
misery ? does not death level us all cequo pede, as the poet hath it ? 
are we not all equally hungry, thirsty, and sleepy, and thus 
levelled by our natural wants ? And such being the case, ought 
we not to have our equal share of good things in this world, to 
which we have an undoubted equal right ? Can any argument 
be more solid or more level than this, whatever nonsense Dr. 
Middleton may talk ? 

“ Yes, my son, if it were not that I still hope to see the sun 
of Justice arise, and disperse the manifold dark clouds which 
obscure the land — if I did not still hope, in my time, to see an 
equal distribution of property — an Agrarian law passed by the 
House of Commons, in which all should benefit alike — I would 
not care how soon I left this vale of tears, created by tyranny 
and injustice. At present, the same system is carried on ; the 
nation is taxed for the benefit of the few, and it groans under 
oppression and despotism ; but I still do think that there is, if 
I may fortunately express myself, a bright star in the west ; 
and signs of the times which comfort me. Already we have 
had a good deal of incendiarism about the country, and some 
of the highest aristocracy have pledged themselves to raise the 
people above themselves, and have advised sedition and con- 
spiracy ; have shown to the debased and unenlightened multitude 
that their force is physically irresistible, and recommended them 
to make use of it, promising that if they hold in power, they will 
only use that power to the abolition of our farce of a constitu- 
tion, of a church, and of a king ; and that if the nation is 
to be governed at all, it shall only be governed by the many. 
This is cheering. Hail, patriot lords ! all hail ! I am in hopes 
that the great work will be achieved, in spite of the laughs and 
sneers and shakes of the head, which my arguments still meet 
with from that obstinate fellow, Dr. Middleton. 

“ Your mother is in a quiet way ; she has given over reading 
and working, and even her knitting, as useless ; and she now 


292 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


sits all day long at the chimney corner twiddling her thumbs, 
and waiting, as she says, for the millennium. Poor thing ! she 
is very foolish with her ideas upon this matter, but as usual I 
let her have her own way in every tiding, copying the philoso- 
pher of old, who was tied to his Xantippe. 

• “I trust, my dear son, that your principles have strengthened 
with your years, and fortified with your growth, and that, if 
necessary, you will sacrifice all to obtain what in my opinion 
will prove to be the real millennium. Make all the converts 
you can, and believe me to be, 

“ Your affectionate father and true guide, 

“Nicodemus Easy.” 

Jack, who was alone, shook his head as he read this letter, 
and then laid it down with a pish ! He did it involuntarily, and 
was surprised at himself when he found that he had so done. 
“ I should like to argue the point,” thought Jack, in spite of 
himself ; and then he threw the letter on the table, and went 
into Gascoigne’s room, displeased with his father and with him- 
self. He asked Ned, whether he had received any letters from 
England, and it now being near dinner-time, went back to 
dress. On his coming down into the receiving-room with Gas- 
coigne, the governor said to them, — 

“ As you two both speak Italian, you must take charge of a 
Sicilian officer, who has come here with letters of introduction 
to me, and who dines here to-day.” 

Before dinner they were introduced to the party in question, 
a slight-made, well-looking young man, but still there was an 
expression in his countenance which was not agreeable. In 
compliance with the wishes of the governor, Hon Mathias, for 
so he was called, was placed between our two midshipmen, who 
immediately entered into conversation with him, being them- 
selves anxious to make inquiries about their friends at Palermo. 
In the course of conversation, Jack inquired of him whether 
he was acquainted with Hon Rebiera, to which the Sicilian 
answered in the affirmative, and they talked about the different 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


293 


members of tbe family. Don Mathias, towards the close of 
the dinner, inquired of Jack by what means he had become 
acquainted with Don Rebiera, and Jack, in reply, narrated 
how he and his friend Gascoigne had saved him from being 
murdered by two villains ; after this reply, the young officer 
appeared to be less inclined for conversation, but before the 
party broke up, requested to have the acquaintance of our two 
midshipmen. As soon as Ke was gone, Gascoigne observed in 
a reflective way, “ I have seen that face before, but where I 
cannot exactly say ; but you know, Jack, what a memory of 
people I have, and I have seen him before, I am sure.” 

“ I can’t recollect that ever I have,” replied our hero, “but 
I never knew any one who could recollect in that way as you 
do.” 

The conversation was then dropped between them, and Jack 
was for some time listening to the governor and Captain Wil- 
son, for the whole party were gone away, when Gascoigne, who 
had been in deep thought since he had made the observation 
to Jack, sprang up. 

“ I have him at last 1” cried he. 

“ Have who ?” demanded Captain Wilson. 

“ That Sicilian officer — I could have sworn that I had seen 
him before.” 

“ That Don Mathias ?” 

“Ho, Sir Thomas ! He is not Don Mathias ! He is the 
very Don Silvio who was murdering Don Rebiera, when we 
came to his assistance and saved him.” 

“ I do believe you are right, Gascoigne.” 

“ I’m positive of it,” replied Gascoigne ; “I never made a 
mistake in my life.” 

“ Bring me those letters, Easy,” said the governor, “ and let 
us see what they say of him. Here it is — Don Mathias de 
Alayeres. You may be mistaken, Gascoigne ; it’s a heavy 
charge you are making against this young man.” 

“ Well, Sir Thomas, if that is not Don Silvio, I’d forfeit my 
commission if I had it here in my hand. Besides, I observed 


294 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


the change in his countenance when we told him it was Easy 
and I who had come to Don Rebiera’s assistance ; and did you 
observe after that, Easy, that he hardly said a word ?” 

“Yerytrue,” replied Jack. 

“Well, well, we must see to this,” observed the governor ; 
“ if so, this letter of introduction must be a forgery.” 

The party then retired to bed, and the next morning, while 
Easy was in Gascoigne’s room talking over their suspicions, 
letters from Palermo were brought up to him. They were in 
answer to those written by Jack on his arrival at Malta : a 
few lines from Don Rebiera, a small note from Agnes, and a 
voluminous detail from his friend Don Philip, who informed him 
of the good health of all parties, and of their good-will towards 
him ; of Agnes being as partial as ever ; of his having spoken 
plainly, as he had promised Jack, to his father and mother rela- 
tive to the mutual attachment ; of their consent being given, 
and then withheld, because Father Thomas, their confessor, 
would not listen to the union of Agnes with a heretic ; but 
nevertheless telling Jack this would be got over through the 
medium of his brother and himself, who were determined that 
their sister and he should not be made unhappy about such a 
trifle. But the latter part of the letter contained intelligence 
equally important, which was, that Don Silvio had again 
attempted the life of their father, and would have succeeded, 
had not Father Thomas, who happened to be there, thrown 
himself between them. That Don Silvio in his rage had actu- 
ally stabbed the confessor, although the wound was not danger- 
ous. That, in consequence of this, all further lenity was denied 
to him, and that the authorities were in search of him to award 
him the punishment due to murder and sacrilege. That up to 
the present they could not find him, and it was supposed that 
he had made his escape to Malta, in one of the speronares. 

Such were the contents of the letter, which were immediately 
communicated to the governor and Captain Wilson, upon their 
meeting at breakfast. 

“ Yery well, we must see to this,” observed the governor, 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


295 


who then 'made his inquiries as to the other intelligence con 
tained in the letters. 

Jack and Gascoigne were uneasy till the breakfast was over, 
when they made their escape : a few moments afterwards Cap- 
tain Wilson rose to go on board, and sent for them, but they 
were not to be found. 

“ I understand it all, Wilson,” said the governor ; “ leave 
them to me ; go on board and make yourself quite easy.” 

In the meantime our two midshipmen had taken their hats 
and walked away to the parapet of the battery, where they 
would not be interrupted. 

“Now, Gascoigne,” observed Jack, “you guess what Pm 
about — I must shoot that rascal this very morning, and that’s 
why I came out with you.” 

“ But, Easy, the only difference is this, that I must shoot 
him and not you ; he is my property, for I found him out.” 

“We’ll argue that point,” replied Jack : “he has attempted 
the life of my is-to-be, please God, father-in-law, and therefore 
I have the best claim to him.” 

“ I beg your pardon, Jack, he is mine, for I discovered him. 
Now let me put a case : suppose one man walking several yards 
before another, picks up a purse, what claim has the other to 
it ? I found him, and not you.” 

“ That’s all very well, Gascoigne ; but suppose the purse you 
picked up to be mine, then I have a right to it, although you 
found it ; he is my bird by right, and not yours.” 

“ But I have another observation to make, which is very 
important : he is a blood relation of Agnes, and if his blood is 
on your hands, however much he may deserve it, depend upon 
it, it will be raised as an obstacle to your union ; think of 
that.” 

Jack paused in thought. 

“ And let me induce you by another remark — you will confer 
on me a most particular favour.” 

“ It will be the greatest I ever could,” replied Jack, “and 
you ought to be eternally indebted to me.” 


296 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


“ I trust to make him eternally indebted to me,” replied 
Gascoigne. 

Sailors, if going into action, always begin to reckon what 
their share of the prize-money may be, before a shot is fired — 
onr two midshipmen appear in this instance to be doing the 
same. 

The point having been conceded to Gascoigne, Jack went to 
the inn where Don Silvio had mentioned that he had taken up 
his quarters, and sending up his card, followed the waiter 
up-stairs. The waiter opened the door, and presented the card. 

“Yery well,” replied Don Silvio, “you can go down and 
show him up.” 

Jack, hearing these words, did not wait, but walked in, 
where he found Don Silvio very busy removing a hone upon 
which he had been whetting a sharp double-edged stiletto. 
The Sicilian walked up to him, offering his hand with apparent 
cordiality ; but Jack with a look of defiance said, “ Don Silvio, 
we know you ; my object now is to demand, on the part of my 
friend, the satisfaction which you do not deserve, but -which our 
indignation at your second attempt upon Don Rebiera induces 
us to offer ; for if you escape from him you -will have to do 
with me. On the whole, Don Silvio, you may think yourself 
fortunate, for it is better to die by the hands of a gentleman 
than by the gibbet.” 

Don Silvio turned deadly pale — his hand sought his stiletto 
in his bosom, but it was remaining on the table ; at last he 
replied, “Be it so — I will meet you when and where you please, 
in an hour from this.” 

Jack mentioned the place of meeting, and then walked out 
of the room. He and Gascoigne then hastened to the quarters 
of an officer they were intimate with, and having provided them- 
selves with the necessary fire-arms, were at the spot before the 
time. They waited for him till the exact time, yet no Don 
Silvio made his appearance. 

“ He’s off,” observed Gascoigne ; “ the villain has escaped 
us.” 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


291 


Half an hour over the time had passed, and still there was 
no sign of Gascoigne’s antagonist, but one of the governor’s 
aide-de-camps was seen walking up to them. 

“Here’s Atkins,” observed Jack ; “that’s unlucky, but he 
won’t interfere.” 

“ Gentlemen,” said Atkins, taking off his hat with much 
solemnity, “ the governor particularly wishes to speak to you 
both.” 

“We can’t come just now — we’ll be there in half an hour.” 

“You must be there in three minutes, both of you. Excuse 
me, my orders are positive — and to see them duly executed I 
have a cbrporal and a file of men behind that wall — of course, 
if you walk with me quietly there will be no occasion to send 
for their assistance.” 

“ This is confounded tyranny,” cried Jack. “Well may 
they call him King Tom.” 

“ Yes,” replied Atkins, “ and he governs here in rey alsoluto 
* — so come along.” 

Jack and Gascoigne, having no choice, walked up to the 
government-house, where they found Sir Thomas in the veranda, 
wffiich commanded a view of the harbour and offing. 

“ Come here, young gentlemen,” said the governor, in a 
severe tone ; “ do you see that vessel about two miles clear of 
the port ? Hon Silvio is in it, going back to Sicily under a 
guard. And now remember what I say as a maxim through 
life. Fight with gentlemen, if you must fight, but not with 
villains and murderers. By consenting to fight with a blackguard , 
you as much disparage your cloth and compromise ycur own 
characters, as by refusing to give satisfaction to a gt \tleman. 
There, go away, for I’m angry with you, and don’t lei me sec 
you till dinner-time.” 


13 * 


298 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY 


CHAPTER XXIX. 

IN WHICH OUR HERO SEES A LITTLE MORE SERVICE, AND IS BETTER 
EMPLOYED THAN IN FIGHTING DON SILVIO. 

But before they met the governor at his table, a sloop of wai 
arrived from the fleet with dispatches from the commander-in- 
chief. Those to Captain Wilson required him to make all pos- 
sible haste in fitting, and then to proceed and cruise off Cor- 
sica, to fall in with a Russian frigate which was on that coast ; 
if not there, to obtain intelligence, and to follow her where- 
ever she might be. 

All was now bustle and activity on board of the Aurora. 
Captain Wilson, with our hero and Gascoigne, quitted the go- 
vernor’s house and repaired on board, where they remained day 
and night. On the third day the Aurora was complete and 
ready for sea, and about noon sailed out of Yalette harbour. 

In a week the Aurora had gained the coast of Corsica, and 
there was no need of sending look-out men to the mast-head, for 
one of the officers or midshipmen was there from daylight to 
dark. She ran up the coast to the northward without seeing the 
object of her pursuit, or obtaining any intelligence. 

Calms and light airs detained them for a few days, when a 
northerly breeze enabled them to run down the eastern side of 
the island. It -was on the 18 th day after they had quitted 
Malta, that a large vessel was seen ahead about eighteen miles 
off. The men were then at breakfast. 

“ A frigate, Captain Wilson, I’m sure of it,” said Mr. Haw- 
kins the chaplain, whose anxiety induced him to go to the mast- 
head. 

“ How is she steering ?” 

“ The same way as we are ?” 

The Aurora was under all possible sail, and when the hands 
were piped to dinner, it was thought that they had neared tho 
chase about two miles. 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


299 


“ This will be a long chase ; a stern chase always is,” ob- 
served Martin to Gascoigne. 

“ Yes, I’m afraid so — but I’m more afraid of her escaping.” 

“ That’s not unlikely either,” replied the mate. 

“You are one of Job’s comforters, Martin,” replied Gas- 
coigne. 

“Then I’m not so often disappointed,” replied the mate. 
“ There are two points to be ascertained ; the first is, whether 
we shall come up with the vessel or lose her — the next is, if we 
do come up with her, whether she is the vessel we are looking 
for.” 

“ You seem very indifferent about it.” 

“ Indeed I am not : I am the oldest passed midshipman in 
the ship, and the taking of the frigate will, if I live, give me 
my promotion, and if I’m killed, I shan’t want it. But I’ve 
been so often disappointed, that I now make sure of nothing 
until I have it.” 

“ Well, for your sake, Martin, I will still hope that the ves- 
sel is the one we seek, that we shall not be killed, and that you 
will gain your promotion.” 

“I thank you, Easy — I wish I was one that dared hope as 
you do.” 

Poor Martin ! he had long felt how bitter it was to meet dis- 
appointment upon disappointment. How true it is, that hope 
deferred maketh the heart sick ! and his anticipations of early 
days, the buoyant calculations of youth, had been one by one 
crushed, and now having served his time nearly three times 
over, the reaction had become too painful, and, as he truly said, 
he dared not hope : still his temper was not soured, but chas- 
tened. 

“ She has hauled her wind, sir,” hailed the second-lieutenant 
from the topmast cross-trees. 

“ What think you of that, Martin ?” observed Jack. 

“ Either that she is an English frigate, or that she is a vessel 
commanded by a very brave fellow, and well manned.” 

It was sun-set before the Aurora had arrived within twc 


300 


mr: midshipman easy. 


miles of the vessel ; the private signal had been thrown out, 
but had not been answered, either because it was too dark tc 
make out the colours of the flags, or that these were unknown 
to an enemy. The stranger had hoisted the English colours, 
but that was no satisfactory proof of her being a friend ; and 
just before dark she had put her head towards the Aurora, who 
had now come stem down to her. The ship’s company of the 
Aurora were all at their quarters, as a few minutes would now 
decide whether they had to deal with a friend or foe. 

There is no situation perhaps more difficult, and demanding 
so much caution, as the occasional meeting with a doubtful ship. 
On the one hand, it being necessary to be fully prepared, and 
not allow the enemy the advantage which may be derived from 
your inaction ; and on the other the necessity of prudence, that 
you may not assault your friends and countrymen. Captain 
Wilson had hoisted the private night-signal, but here again it 
was difficult, from his sails intervening, for the other ship to 
make it out. Before the two frigates were within three cables 
length of each other, Captain Wilson, determined that there 
should be no mistake from any want of precaution on his part, 
hauled up his courses and brailed up his driver that the night- 
signal might be clearly seen. 

Lights were seen abaft on the quarter-deck of the other ves- 
sel, as if they were about to answer, but she continued to keep 
the Aurora to leeward at about half a cable’s length, and as the 
foremost guns of each vessel were abreast of each other, hailed 
in English — 

“ Ship ahoy ! what ship ’s that ?” 

“ His majesty’s ship Aurora,” replied Captain Wilson, who 
stood on the hammocks. “ What ship ’s that ?” 

By this time, the other frigate had passed half a length clear 
of the beam of the Aurora, and at the same time that a pre- 
tended reply of “ his majesty’s ship ” was heard, a broad- 

side from her guns, which had been trained aft, on purpose, was 
poured into the Aurora, and, at so short a distance, doing con- 
liderable execution. The crew of the Aurora, hearing the hail- 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


301 


mg in English, and the vessel passing them apparently without 
firing, had imagined that she had been one of their own cruisers. 
The captains of the guns had dropped their lanyards in disap- 
pointment, and the silence which had been maintained as the 
two vessels met, was just breaking up in various ways of lamen- 
tation at their bad luck, when the broadside was poured in, 
thundering in their ears, and the ripping and tearing of the 
beams and planks astonished their senses. Many were carried 
down below, but it was difficult to say whether indignation at 
the enemy’s ruse, or satisfaction at discovering that they were 
not called to quarters in vain, most predominated. At all events, 
it was answered by three voluntary cheers, which drowned the 
cries of those who were being assisted to the cockpit. 

“ Man the larboard-guns and about ship !” cried Captain 
Wilson, leaping off the hammocks. “ Look out, my lads, and 
rake her in stays ! We’ll pay him off for that foul play before 
we’ve done with him. Look out, my lads, and take good aim 
as she pays round.” 

The Aurora was put about, and her broadside poured into 
the stern of the Russian frigate — for such she was. It was 
almost dark, but the enemy, who appeared as anxious as the 
Aurora to come to action, hauled up her courses to await her 
coming up. In five minutes the two vessels were alongside, ex- 
changing murderous broadsides at little more than pistol shot — 
running slowly in for the land, then not more than five miles dis- 
tant. The skin-clad mountaineers of Corsica were aroused by 
the furious cannonading, watching the incessant flashes of the 
guns, and listening to their reverberating roar. 

After half an hour’s fierce combat, during which the fire of 
both vessels was kept up with undiminished vigour, Captain 
Wilson went down on the main deck, and himself separately 
pointed each gun after it was loaded ; those amidships being 
direct for the main-channels of the enemy’s ship, while those 
abaft the beam were gradually trained more and more for- 
ward, and those before the beam more and more aft, so as to 
throw all their shot nearly into one focus, giving directions that 


302 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


they were all to be fired at oncte, at the word of command. The 
enemy, not aware of the cause of the delay, imagined that the 
fire of the Aurora had slackened, and loudly cheered. At the 
word given, the broadside was poured in, and, dark as it was, 
the effects from it were evident. Two of the midship ports of 
the antagonist were blown into one, and her main-mast was seen 
. to totter, and then to fall over the side. The Aurora then set 
her courses, which had been hauled up, and shooting ahead, 
took up a raking position while the Russian was still hampered 
with her wreck, and poured in grape and cannister from her 
upper deck carronades to impede their labours' on deck, while 
she continued her destructive fire upon the hull of the enemy 
from the main-deck battery. 

The moon now burst out from a low bank of clouds, and 
enabled them to accomplish their work with more precision. In 
a quarter of an hour the Russian was totally dismasted, and 
Captain Wilson ordered half of his remaining ship’s company 
to repair the damages, which had been most severe, whilst the 
larboard men at quarters continued the fire from the main deck. 
The enemy continued to return the fire from four guns, two on 
each of her decks, which she could still make bear upon the 
Aurora ; but after some time even these ceased, either from 
the men having deserted them, or from their being dismounted. 
Observing that the fire from her antagonist had ceased, the 
Aurora also discontinued, and the jolly-boat astern being still 
uninjured, the second-lieutenant was deputed to pull alongside 
of the frigate to ascertain if she had struck. 

The beams of the bright moon silvered, the rippling water as 
the boat shoved off ; and Captain Wilson and his officers who 
were still unhurt, leant over the shattered sides of the Aurora, 
waiting for a reply : suddenly the silence of the night was 
broken upon by a loud splash from the bows of the Russian fri- 
gate, then about three cables’ length distant. 

“ What could that be ?” cried Captain Wilson. “Her anchor’s 
down. Mr. Jones, a lead over the side, and see what water we 
have.” 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


303 


Mr. J ones had long been carried down below, severed in two 
with a round shot — but a man- leaped into the chains, and low- 
ering down the lead, sounded in seven fathoms. 

“ Then I suspect he will give us more trouble yet,” observed 
Captain Wilson ; and so indeed it proved, for the Russian cap- 
tain, in reply to the second-lieutenant, had told him in English, 
“ that he would answer that question with his broadside,” and 
before the boat was dropped astern, he had warped round with 
the springs on his cable, and had recommenced his fire upon 
the Aurora. 

Captain Wilson made sail upon his ship, and sailed round 
and round the anchored vessel, so as to give her two broadsides 
to her one, and from the slowness with which she worked at her 
springs upon her cables, it was evident that she must be now 
very weak-handed. Still the pertinacity and decided courage 
of the Russian captain convinced Captain Wilson, that, in all 
probability, he would sink at his anchor before he would haul 
down his colours ; and not only would he lose more of the 
Aurora’s men, but also the Russian vessel, without he took a 
more decided step. Captain Wilson, therefore, resolved to try 
her by the board. Having poured in a raking fire, he stood off 
for a few moments, during which he called the officers and men 
on deck, and stated his intention. He then went about, and 
himself conning the Aurora, ran her on board the Russian, 
pouring in his reserved broadside as the vessels came into colli- 
sion, and heading his men as they leaped on the enemy’s decks. 

Although, as Captain Wilson had imagined, the Russian fri- 
gate had not many men to oppose to the Aurora’s, the deck 
was obstinately defended, the voice and the arm of the Russian 
captain were to be heard and seen everywhere, and his men, 
encouraged by him, were cut down by numbers where they 
stood. 

Our hero, who had the good fortune to be still unhurt, was 
for a little while close to Captain Wilson when he boarded, and 
was about to oppose his unequal force against that of the Rus- 
sian captain, when he was pulled back by the collar by Mr. 


304 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


Hawkins, the chaplain, who rushed in advance with a sabre in 
his hand. The opponents were well matched, and it may be 
said that, with little interruption, a hand-to-hand conflict ensued, 
for the moon lighted up the scene of carnage, and they were 
well able to distinguish each other’s faces. At last, the chap- 
lain’s sword broke ; he rushed in, drove the hilt into his* anta- 
gonist’s face, closed with him, and they both fell down the 
hatchway together. After this, the deck was gained, or rather 
cleared, by the crew of the Aurora, for few could be said .to 
have resisted, and in a minute or two the frigate was in their 
possession. The chaplain and the Russian captain were hoisted 
up, still clinging to each other, both senseless from the fall, but 
neither of them dead, although bleeding from several wounds. 

As soon as the main-deck had been cleared, Captain Wilson 
ordered the hatches to be put on, and left a party on board 
while he hastened to attend to the condition of his own ship 
and ship’s company. 

It was daylight before any thing like order had been restored 
to the decks of the Aurora ; the water was still smooth, and 
instead of letting go her own anchor, she had hung on with a 
hawser to the prize, but her sails had been furled, her decks 
cleared, guns secured, and the buckets were dashing away the 
blood from her planks and the carriages of the guns, when the 
sun rose and shone upon them. The numerous wounded had, 
by this time, been put into their hammocks, although there were 
still one or two cases of amputation to be performed. 

The carpenter had repaired all shot-holes under or too near 
to the water-line, and then had proceeded to sound the well of 
the prize ; but although her upper works had been dreadfully 
shattered, there was no reason to suppose that she had received 
any serious injury below, and therefore the hatches still remained 
on, although a few hands were put to the pumps to try if she 
made any water. It was not until the Aurora presented a more 
cheerful appearance that Captain Wilson went over to the other 
ship, whose deck, now that the light of heaven enabled them to 
witness all the horrors even to minuteness, presented a shock- 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


305 


tng spectacle of blood and carnage. Body after body was 
thrown over ; the wounded were supplied with water and such 
assistance as could be rendered until the surgeons could attend 
them ; the hatches were then taken off, and the remainder of her 
crew ordered on deck ; about two hundred obeyed the sum- 
mons, but the lower deck was as crowded with killed and 
wounded as was the upper. For the present the prisoners were 
handed over down into the fore-hold of the Aurora, which had 
been,, prepared for their reception, and the work of separation 
of the dead from the living then undertaken. After this, such 
repairs as were immediately necessary were made, and a por- 
tion of the Aurora’s crew, under the orders of the second- 
lieutenant, were sent on board to take charge of her. It was 
not till the evening of the day after this night-conflict, that the 
Aurora was in a situation to make sail. All hands were then 
sent on board of the Trident, for such was the name of the 
Russian frigate, to fit her out as soon as possible. Before 
morning, — for there was no relaxation from their fatigue, nor 
was there any wish for it, — all was completed, and the two fri- 
gates, although in a shattered condition, were prepared to meet 
any common conflict with the elements. The Aurora made sail 
with the Trident in tow ; the hammocks were allowed to be 
taken down, and the watch below permitted to repose. 

In this murderous conflict the Trident had more than two 
hundred men killed and wounded. The Aurora’s loss had not 
been so great, but still it was severe, having lost sixty-five men 
and officers. Among the fallen there were Mr. Jones, the mas- 
ter, the third-lieutenant, Mr. Arkwright, and two midshipmen 
killed. Mr. Pottyfar, the first-lieutenant, severely wounded at 
the commencement of the action. Martin, the master’s mate, 
and Gascoigne, the first mortally, and the second badly, 
wounded. Our hero had also received a slight cutlass wound, 
which obliged him to wear his arm, for a short time, in a 
sling. 

Among the ship’s company who were wounded was Mesty ; 
he had been hurt with a splinter before the Trident was taken 


306 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


by the board, but had remained on deck, and had followed our 
hero, watching over him and protecting him as a father. He 
had done even more, for he had with Jack thrown himself be- 
fore Captain Wilson, at a time that he had received such a 
blow with the flat of a sword as to stun him, and bring him 
down on his knee. And Jack had taken good care that Cap- 
tain Wilson should not be ignorant, as he really would have 
been, of this timely service on the part of Mesty, who certainly, 
although with a great deal of sang froid in his composition 
when in repose, was a fiend incarnate when his blood was up. 

“ But you must have been with Mesty,” observed Captain 
Wilson, “ when he did me the service.” 

“ I was with him, sir,” replied Jack, with great modesty ; 
“ but -was of very little service.” 

“ How is your friend Gascoigne this evening ?” 

“ 0, not very bad, sir — he wants a glass of grog.” 

“ And Mr. Martin ?” 

Jack shook his head. 

“ Why, the surgeon thinks he will do well.” 

“ Yes, sir, and so I told Martin ; but he said that it was very 
well to give him hope ; but that he thought otherwise.” 

“ You must manage him, Mr. Easy ; tell him that he is 
sure of his promotion.” 

“ I have, sir, but he won’t believe it. He never will believe 
it till he has his commission signed. I really think that an 
acting order would do more than the doctor can.” 

“Well, Mr. Easy, he shall have one to-morrow morning. 
Have you seen Mr. Pottyfar ? he, I am afraid, is very bad. 

“ Yery bad, sir ; and they say is worse every day, and yet 
his wound is. healthy, and ought to be doing well.” # 

Such was the conversation between Jack and his cap- 
tain, as they sat at breakfast on the third morning after the 
action. 

The next day Easy took down an acting order for Martin, 
and put it into his hands. The mate read it over as he lav 
bandaged in his hammock. 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


307 


“ It’s only an acting order, Jack,” said he, “it may not he 
confirmed.” 

Jack swore by all the articles of war, that it would be ; but 
Martin replied that he was sure it never would. 

“No, no,” said the mate, “ I knew very well that I never 
should be made. If it is not confirmed, I may live ; but if it is, 
I am sure to die.” 

Every one that went to Martin’s hammock wished him joy 
of his promotion ; but six days after the action, poor Martin’s 
remains were consigned to the deep. 

The next person who followed him was Mr. Pottyfar, the 
first-lieutenant, who had contrived, wounded as he was, to reach 
a packet of the universal medicine, and had taken so many bot- 
tles before he was found out, that he was one morning found 
dead in his bed, with more than two dozen empty phials under 
his pillow, and by the side of his mattress. He was not bu- 
ried with his hands in his pockets, but when sewed up in his 
hammock, they were, at all events, laid in the right position. 


CHAPTER XXX. 

MODERN PHILANTHROPY WHICH, AS' USUAL, IS THE CAUSE OF MUCH 
TROUBLE AND VEXATION, 

In three weeks the Aurora, with her prize in tow, arrived at 
Malta. The wounded were sent to the hospital, and the gallant 
Russian captain recovered from his wounds about the same 
time as Mr. Hawkins, the chaplain. 

Jack, who constantly called to see the chaplain, had a great 
deal to do to console him. He would shake his hands as he lay 
in his bed, exclaiming against himself. “ Oh,” would he say, 
£ 1 the spirit is willing but the flesh is weak. That I, a man of 
God, as they term me, who ought to have been down with the 
surgeons, whispering comfort to the desponding, should have 


308 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


gone on deck (but I could not help it), and have mixed in 
such a scene of slaughter. What will become of me ?” 

Jack attempted to console him by pointing out, that not only 
chaplains, but bishops, have been known to fight in armour 
from time immemorial. But Mr. Hawkins’s recovery was long 
doubtful, from the agitation of his mind. When he was able 
to walk, Jack introduced to him the Russian captain, who was 
also just out of his bed. 

“Iam most happy to embrace so gallant an officer,” said the 
Russian, who recognized his antagonist, throwing his arms 
round the chaplain, and giving him a kiss on both cheeks. 
“ What is his rank ?” continued he, addressing himself to Jack, 
who replied, very quietly, “ that he was the ship’s padre.” 

“The padre !” replied the captain, with surprise, as Hawkins 
turned away with confusion. “ The padre — par example ! 
Well, I always had a great respect for the church. Pray, sir,” 
said he, turning to Easy, “ do your padres always head your 
boarders ?” 

“ Always, sir,” replied Jack ; “ it’s a rule of the service — 
and the duty of a padre to show the men the way to heaven 
It’s our ninty-ninth article of war.” 

“ You are a fighting nation,” replied the Russian, bowing to 
Hawkins, and continuing his walk, not exactly pleased that he 
had been floored by a parson. 

Mr. Hawkins continued very disconsolate for some time ; he 
then invalided, and applied himself to his duties on shore, 
where he would not be exposed to such temptations from his 
former habits. 

As the Aurora, when she was last at Malta, had nearly ex- 
hausted the dockyard for her repairs, she was even longer fitting 
out this time, during which Captain Wilson’s dispatches had 
►been received by the admiral, and had been acknowledged by a 
brig sent to Malta. The admiral, in reply, after complimenting 
him upon his gallantry and success, desired that, as soon as he 
was ready, he should proceed to Palermo with communications 
of importance to the authorities, and having remained there for 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


309 


an answer, was again to return to Malta to pick up suck of liis 
men as might be fit to leave the hospital, and then join the 
Toulon fleet. This intelligence was soon known to our hero, 
who was in ecstacies at the idea of again seeing Agnes and her 
brothers. Once more the Aurora sailed away from the high- 
crowned rocks of Yalette, and with a fine breeze dashed 
through the deep blue waves. 

But towards the evening the breeze increased, and they were 
under double-reefed topsails. On the second day they made 
the coast of Sicily, not far from where Easy and Gascoigne 
had been driven on shore; the weather was then more moderate, 
and the sea had, to a great degree, subsided. They therefore 
stood in close to the coast, as they had not a leading wind to 
Palermo. As they stood in, the glasses, as usual, were directed 
to land, observing the villas with which the hills and valley^ 
were studded, with their white fronts embowered in orange 
groves. 

“What is that, Gascoigne,” said Easy, “under that preci- 
pice ? — it looks like a vessel.” 

Gascoigne turned his glass in the direction— “ Yes, it is a 
vessel on the rocks : by her prow she looks like a galley.” 

“ It is a galley, sir — one of the row galleys — I can make out 
her bank of oars,” observed the signal-man. 

This was reported to Captain Wilson, who also examined her. 

“ She is on the rocks, certainly,” observed he; “ and I think I 
see people on board. Keep her away a point, quarter-master.” 

The Aurora was now steered direct for the vessel, and in the 
course of an hour was not more than a mile from her. Their 
suppositions were correct — it was one of the Sicilian govern- 
ment galleys bilged on the rocks, and they now perceived that 
there were people on board of her, making signals with their 
shirts and pieces of linen. 

“ They must be the galley-slaves; for I perceive that they 
do not one of them change their position : the galley must have 
been abandoned by the officers and seamen, and the slaves left 
to perish.” 


BIO 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


“That’s very hard,” observed Jack to Gascoigne; “they 
were condemned to the galleys, but not to death.” 

“ They will not have much mercy from the waves,” replied 
Gascoigne; “they will all be in kingdom come to-morrow morn- 
ing, if the breeze comes more on the land. We have already 
come up two points this forenoon.” 

Although Captain Wilson did not join in this conversation, 
which he overheard as he stood on the forecastle gun, with his 
glass over the hammocks, it appears he was of the same opin- 
ion; but he demurred : he had to choose between allowing so 
many of his fellow-creatures to perish miserably,, or to let loose 
upon society a set of miscreants, who would again enter a 
course of crime until they were recaptured, and by so doing, 
probably displease the Sicilian authorities. After some little 
reflection, he resolved that he would take his chance of the 
latter. The Aurora was hove-to in stays, and the two cutters 
ordered to be lowered down, and the boat’s crew to be armed. 

“ Mr. Easy, do you take one cutter and the armourers; pull 
on board of the galley, release those people and land them in 
small divisions. Mr. Gascoigne, you will take the other to as- 
sist Mr. Easy, and when he lands them in his boat, you will 
pull by his side, ready to act in case of any hostile attempt on 
the part of the scoundrels, for we must not expect gratitude : 
of course land them at the nearest safe spot for debarka- 
tion.” 

In pursuance of these orders, our two midshipmen pulled 
away to the vessel. The found her fixed hard upon the rocks, 
which had pierced her slight timbers, and, as they had sup- 
posed, the respectable part of her crew, with the commander, 
had taken to the boats, leaving the galley-slaves to their fate. 
She pulled fifty oars, but had only thirty-six manned. These 
oars were forty feet long, and ran in from the thole-pin with a 
loom six feet long, each manned by four slaves, who were 
chained to their seat before it, by a running chain made fast by 
a padlock in amidships. A plank, of two feet wide, ran fore 
and aft the vessel between the two banks of oars, for the boat- 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


311 


swain to apply the lash to those who did not sufficiently exert 
themselves. 

“ Viva los Inglesos !” cried the galley-slaves as Easy climbed 
up over the quarter of the vessel. 

“ I say, Ned, did you ever see such a precious set of vil- 
lains ?” observed Easy, as he surveyed the faces of the men who 
were chained. 

“No,” replied Gascoigne; “and I think if the captain had 
seen them as we have, that he would have left them where 
they were.” 

“ I don’t know — but however, our orders are positive. 
Armourer, knock off all the padlocks, beginning aft ; when 
we have a cargo we will land them. How many are there ? 
— twelve dozen ? — twelve dozen villains to let loose upon 
society. I have a great mind to go on board again and report 
my opinion to the captain — one hundred and forty-four vil- 
lains, who all deserve hanging — for drowning is too good 
for them.” 

“ Our orders are to liberate them, Jack.” 

“ Yes ; but I should like to argue this point with Captain 
Wilson.” 

“They’ll send after them fast enough, Jack, and they’ll 
all be in limbo again before long,” replied Gascoigne. 

“Well, I suppose we must obey orders ; but it goes against 
my conscience to save such villainous-looking rascals. Armourer, 
hammer away.” 

The armourer, who, with the seamen, appeared very much of 
Jack’s opinion, and had not commenced his work, now struck 
off the padlocks, one by one, with his sledge-hammer. As 
soon as they were released the slaves were ordered into the 
cutter, and when it was sufficiently loaded Jack shoved off, 
followed by Gascoigne as guard, and landed them at the 
point about a cable’s length distant. It required six trips 
before they were all landed : the last cargo were on shore, and 
Easy was desiring the men to shove off, when one of the 
gallerians turned round, and cried out to Jack in a mocking 


812 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


tone, “Addio, signor, a reveder la.” Jack started, stared, and, 
in the squalid, naked wretch who addressed him, he recognised 
Don Silvio ! 

“I will acquaint Don Rebiera of your arrival, signor,” 
said the miscreant, springing up the rocks, and mixing with 
the rest, who now commenced hooting and laughing at their 
preservers. 

“Ned,” observed Easy to Gascoigne, “we have let that 
rascal loose.” 

“ More’s the pity,” replied Gascoigne ; “ but we have only 
obeyed orders.” 

“ It can’t be helped, but I’ve a notion there will be some mis- 
chief out of this.” 

“We obeyed orders,” replied Gascoigne. 

“ We’ve let the rascals loose not ten miles from Don 
Rebiera’s.” 

“ Obeyed orders, Jack.” 

“ With a whole gang to back him, if he goes there.” 

“ Orders, Jack.” 

“ Agnes at his mercy.” 

“ Captain’s orders, Jack.” 

“ I shall argue this point when I go on board,” replied 
Jack. 

“ Too late, Jack.” 

“ Yes,” replied Easy, sinking down on the stern sheets with a 
look of despair. 

“ Give way, my lads, give way.” 

Jack returned on board, and reported what he had done ; 
also that Don Silvio was among those liberated ; and he 
ventured to mention his fears of what might take place from 
their contiguity to the house of Don Rebiera. Captain Wilson 
bit his lips : he felt that his philanthropy had induced him 
to act without his usual prudence. 

“I have done a rash thing, Mr. Easy, I am afraid. I 
should have taken them all on board and delivered them 
up to the authorities. I wish I had thought of that before. 


MK. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


313 


We must get to Palermo as fast as we can, and have the 
troops sent after these miscreants. Hands ’bout ship, fill the 
main-yard.” * 

The wind had veered round, and the Aurora was now able 
to lay up clear of the island of Maritimo. The next morning 
she anchored in Palermo Roads — gave immediate notice to 
the authorities, who, wishing Captain Wilson’s philanthropy 
at the devil, immediately dispatched a large body of troops 
in quest of the liberated malefactors. Captain Wilson, feel- 
ing for Jack’s anxiety about his friends, called him over to 
him on deck, and gave him and Gascoigne permission to go 
on shore. 

“Will you allow me to take Mesty with me, sir, if you 
please ?” said Jack. 

“ Yes, Mr. Easy ; but recollect that, even with Mesty, 
you are no match for one hundred and fifty men, so be pru- 
dent. I send you to relieve your anxiety, not to run into 
danger.” 

“ Of course, sir,” replied Jack, touching his hat, and walking 
away quietly till he came to the hatchway, when he darted 
down like a shot, and was immediately occupied with his prepa- 
rations. 

In half-an-hour our two midshipmen, with Mesty, had landed, 
and proceeded to the inn where they had put up before : they 
were armed up to the teeth. Their first inquiries were for Don 
Philip and his brother. 

“ Both on leave of absence,” replied the landlord, “ and stay- 
ing with Don Rebiera.” 

“ That’s some comfort,” thought Jack. “Now we must get 
horses as fast as we can. Mesty, can you ride ?” 

“ By all de power, can I ride, Massa Easy; suppose you ride 
Kentucky horse, you ride any ting.” 

In half-an-hour four horses and a guide were procured, and, 
at eight o’clock in the morning, the party set off in the direc- 
tion of Don Rebiera’s country seat. 

They had not ridden more than six miles, when they came up 

U 


314 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


with one of the detachments sent out in pursuit of the liberated 
criminals. Our hero recognised the commanding officer as an 
old acquaintance, and imparting to him the release of Don 
Silvio, and his fears upon Don Rebiera’s account, begged him 
to direct his attention that way. 

“ Corpo di Bacco — you are right, Signor Mid,” replied the 
officer, “ but Don Philip is there, and his brother too, I believe. 
I will be there by ten o’clock to-morrow morning ; we will 
march almost the whole night.” 

“ They have no arms ” observed Easy. 

“No, but they will soon get them : they will go to some 
small town in a body, plunder it, and then seek the protection 
of the mountains. Your captain has given us a pretty job.” 

Jack exchanged a few more words, and then, excusing- him- 
self on account of his haste, put the spurs to his horse, and 
regained his own party, who now proceeded at a rapid pace. 

“ 0 signor !” said the guide, “ we shall kill the horses.” 

“ I’ll pay for them,” said Jack. 

“Yes, but we shall kill them before we get there, Jack,” 
replied Gascoigne, “ and have to walk the rest of the way.” 

“Very true, Ned; let’s pull up, and give them their 
wind.” 

“ By de holy poker, Massa Easy, but my shirt stick to my 
ribs,” cried Mesty, whose black face was hung with dewdrops 
from their rapid course. 

“Never mind, Mesty.” 

It was about five o’clock in the afternoon when they arrived 
at the seat of Dog Rebiera. Jack threw himself off his jaded 
steed, and hastened into the house, followed by Gascoigne. 
They found the whole family collected in the large sitting-room, 
quite ignorant of any danger threatening them, and equally 
astonished and pleased at the arrival of their old friends. Jack 
flew to Agnes, who screamed when she saw him, and felt so 
giddy afterwards that he was obliged to support her. Having 
seated her again, he was kindly greeted by the old people and 
ihe two young officers. After a few minutes dedicated to 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


315 


mutual inquiries, our hero stated the cause of their expeditious 
arrival. 

“ Don Silvio, with one hundred and fifty gallerians, let loose 
on the coast yesterday afternoon !” exclaimed Don Rebiera ; 
“ you are right, I only wonder they were not here last night. 
But I expect Pedro from the town ; he has gone down with a 
load of wine ; he will bring us intelligence.” 

“At all events, we must be prepared,” said Don Philip 
“ the troops you say will be here to-morrow morning.” 

“ Holy Virgin 1” exclaimed the ladies, in a breath. 

“ How many can we muster ?” said Gascoigne. 

“ We have five men here, or we shall have by the evening,” 
replied Don Philip — “ all, I think, good men — my father, my 
brother, and myself.” 

“We are three, — four with the guide, whom I know nothing 
about.” 

“ Twelve in all — not one too many ; but I think that now 
we are prepared, if they attack, we can hold out till the 
morning.” 

“ Had we not better send the ladies away,” said Jack. 

“ Who is to escort them ?” replied Don Philip ; “we shall 
only weaken our force : besides, they may fall into the miscre- 
ants’ hands.” 

“ Shall we all leave the house together ? they can but plun- 
der it,” observed Don Rebiera. 

“ Still we may be intercepted by them, and our whole force 
will be nothing against so many,” observed Don Philip, “if we 
are without defence, whereas in the house we shall have an ad- 
vantage.” 

“£ vero,” replied Don Rebiera thoughtfully; “then let us 
prepare, for depend upon it, Don Silvio will not lose such an op- 
portunity to wreak his vengeance. He will be here to-night : I 
only wonder he has not been here with his companions before. 
However, Pedro will arrive in two hours.” 

“We must now see what means we have of defence,” said 
Philip. “ Come, brother — will you come, sir ?” 


316 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


CHAPTER XXXI. 

» 

A REGULAR SET-TO, IN WHICH THE PARTIES BEATEN ARE NOT KNOCKED 

DOWN, BUT RISE HIGHER AND HIGHER AT EACH DISCOMFITURE 

NOTHING BUT THE TROOPS COULD HAVE PREVENTED THEM FROM 
GOING UP TO HEAVEN. 

Hon Rebiera and his two sons quitted the room, Gascoigne 
entered into conversation with the senora, while Easy took this 
opportunity of addressing Agnes. He had been too much occu- 
pied with the consultation to pay her much attention before. 
He had spoken, with his eyes fixed upon her, and had been sur- 
prised at the improvement which had taken place in less than a 
year. He now went to her, and asked her, in a low voice, 
“ whether she had received his letter ?” 

“ Oh yes !” replied she, colouring. 

“ And were you angry with what I said, Agnes ?” in a low 
tone. 

“ No,” replied she, casting her eyes down on the floor. 

“ 1 repeat now what I said, Agues — I have never forgotten 
you.” 

“ But ” 

“ But what ?” 

“ Father Thomaso.” 

“ What of him?” 

“ He never will ” 

“Will what ?” 

“You are a heretic, he says.” 

“ Tell him to mind his own business.” 

“He has great influence with my father and mother.” 

“ Your brothers are on our side.” 

“ I know that, but there will be great difficulty. Our re- 
ligion is not the same. He must talk to you — he will convert 
you.” 

“ We’ll argue that point, Agnes. I will convert him if he 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


311 

has common sense, if not, it’s no use arguing with him. Where 
is he ?” 

“ He will soon be at home.” 

“ Tell me, Agnes, if you had your own will, would you marry 
me ?” 

“ I don’t know ; I have never seen any one I liked so well.” 

“ Is that all ?” 

“Is it not enough for a maiden to say ?” replied Agnes, 
raising her eyes, and looking reproachfully. “ Signor, let me go, 
here comes my father.” 

Notwithstanding, Jack cast his eyes to the window where 
Gascoigne and the senora were in converse, and perceiving that 
the old lady’s back was turned, he pressed Agnes to his bosom 
before he released her. The gentlemen then returned with 
with all the fire-arms and destructive weapons they could 
collect. 

“ We have enough,” observed Don Philip, “ to arm all the peo- 
ple we have with us.” 

“ And we are well armed,” replied Jack, who had left Agnes 
standing alone. “ What now are your plans ?” 

“ Those we must now consult about. It appears” — but at 
this moment the conversation was interrupted by the sudden 
entrance of Pedro, who had been dispatched to the town with 
the load of wine. He rushed in, flurried and heated, with his 
red cap in his hand. 

“ How now, Pedro, back so early ?” 

“Oh, signor!” exclaimed the man — “they have taken 
the cart and the wine, and have drawn it away, up to the 
mountains.” 

“ Who ?” inquired Don Kebiera. 

“ The galley-slaves who have been let loose — and by the 
body of our blessed saint, they have done pretty mischief — 
they have broken into the houses, robbed everything — mur- 
dered many — clothed themselves with the best — collected all 
the arms, provisions, and wine they could lay their hands on 
and have marched away into the mountains. This took place 


318 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


last night. As I was coming down within a mile of the town, 
they met me with my loaded cart, and they turned the bullocks 
round and drove them away along with the rest. By the 
blessed Virgin ! but they are stained with blood, but not alto- 
gether of men, for they have cut up some of the oxen. I 
heard this from one of the herdsmen, but he too fled and 
could not tell me more. But, signor, I heard them mention 
your name.” 

“ I have no doubt of it,” replied Bon Rebiera. “ As for the 
wine, I only hope they will drink too much of it to-night. But 
Pedro, they will be here, and we must defend ourselves — so call 
the men together ; I must speak to them.” 

"We shall never see the bullocks again,” observed Pedro, 
mournfully. 

“No. : but we shall never see one another again, if we do 
not take care. I have information they come here to-night.” 

“ Holy Saint Francis ! and they say there are a thousand of 
them.” 

“Not quite so many, to my knowledge,” observed Jack. 

“ They told me that a great many were killed in their attack 
upon the town, before they mastered it.” 

“ So much the better. Go now, Pedro, drink a cup of wine, 
and then call the other men.” 

The house was barricaded, as well as circumstances would 
permit ; the first story was also made a fortress by loading the 
landing-place with armories and chests of drawers. The upper 
story, or attic, if it might be so called, was defended in the 
same way, that they might retreat from one to the other if the 
doors were forced. 

It was eight o’clock in the evening before all was ready, 
and they were still occupied with the last defence, under the 
superintendence of Mesty, who showed himself an able en- 
gineer, when they heard the sound of an approaching multi- 
tude. They looked out of one of the windows, and perceived 
the house surrounded by the galley-slaves, in number, appa- 
rently, about a hundred. They were all dressed in a most 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


319 


fantastic manner with whatever they could pick up : some had 
fire-arms, but the most of them were supplied with only swords 
or knives. With them came also their cortege of plunder: carts 
of various descriptions, loaded with provisions of all sorts, and 
wine ; women lashed down with ropes, sails from the vessels, 
and boats to supply them with covering in the mountains, hay 
and straw and mattresses. Their plunder appeared to be well 
chosen for their exigencies. To the carts were tied a variety 
of cattle, intended to accompany them to their retreat. They 
all appeared to be under a leader, who was issuing directions 
— that leader was soon recognised by those in the house to be 
Don Silvio. 

“ Massa Easy, you show me dat man ?” said Mesty, when he 
heard the conversation between Easy and the Rebieras; “ only 
let me know him.” 

“Do you see him there, Mesty, walking down in front of 
those men ? he has a musket in his hand, a jacket with silver 
buttons, and white trousers.” 

“Yes, Massa Easy, me see him well — let me look little more 
— dat enough.” 

The galley-slaves appeared to bewery anxious to surround the 
house that no one should escape, and Don Silvio was arranging 
the men. 

“ Red,” said Jack, “ let us show him that we are here. ‘He 
said that he would acquaint Don Rebiera with our arrival — let 
us prove to him that he is too late.” 

“ It would not be a bad plan,” replied Gascoigne ; “ if it 
were possible that these fellows had any gratitude among them, 
some of them might relent at the idea of attacking those who 
saved them.” 

“ Not a bit ; but it will prove to them that there are more 
in the house than they think for ; and we can frighten some of 
them by telling them that the soldiers are near at hand.” 

Jack immediately threw up the casement, and called out in 
a loud voice, “Don Silvio ! galley-slave 1 Don Silvio !” 


320 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


The party hailed turned round, and beheld Jack, Gascoigne, 
and Mesty, standing at the window of the upper floor. 

“We have saved you the trouble of announcing us,” called 
out Gascoigne. “We are here to receive you.” 

“ And in three hours the troops will be here, so you must be 
quick, Don Silvio,” continued Jack. 

11 A reveder la ,” continued Gascoigne, letting fly his pistol at 
Don Silvio. 

The window was then immediately closed. The appearance 
of our heroes, and their communication of the speedy arrival of 
the troops, was not without effect. The criminals trembled at 
the idea ; Don Silvio was mad with rage — he pointed out to 
the men the necessity of immediate attack — the improbability 
of the troops arriving so soon, and the wealth which he expected 
was locked up by Don Rebiera in his mansion. This rallied 
them, and they advanced to the doors, which they attempted 
to force without success, losing several men by the occasional 
fire from those within the house. Finding their efforts, after half 
an hour’s repeated attempts, to be useless, they retreated, and 
then bringing up a long piece of timber, which required sixty 
men to carry it, they ran with it against the door, and the 
weight and impetus of the timber drove it off its hinges, and 
an entrance was obtained ; by this time it was dark, the lower 
story had been abandoned, but the barricade at the head of 
the stairs opposed their progress. Convenient loop-holes had 
been prepared by the defenders, who now opened a smart fire 
upon the assailants, the latter having no means of returning it 
effectually, had they had ammunition for their muskets, which 
fortunately they had not been able to procure. The combat 
now became fierce, and the galley-slaves were several times 
repulsed with great loss during a contest of two hours ; but, 
encouraged by Don Silvio, and refreshed by repeated draughts 
of wine, they continued by degrees removing the barriers 
opposed to them. 

“We shall have to retreat 1” exclaimed Don Rebiera ; “ very 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


321 


soon they will have torn down all. What do you think, Signor 
Easy ? ” 

“ Hold this as long as we can. How are we off for ammuni 
tion ?” 

“ Plenty as yet — plenty to last for six hours, I think.” 

“ What do you say, Mesty ?” 

“ By holy St. Patrig— I say hold out here — they got no fire* 
arms — and we ab um at arm-length.” 

This decision was the occasion of the first defence being held 
for two hours more, an occasional relief being afforded by the 
retreat of the convicts to the covered carts. 

At last it was evident that the barricade was no longer ten- 
able, for the heavy pieces of furniture they had heaped up to 
oppose entrance, were completely hammered to fragments by 
poles brought up by the assailants, and used as battering-rams. 
The retreat was sounded ; they all hastened to the other story, 
where the ladies were already placed, and the galley-slaves 
were soon in possession of the first floor — exasperated by the 
defence, mad with wine and victory, but finding nothing. 

Again was the attack made upon the second landing, but, as 
the stairs were now narrower, and their defences stronger in 
proportion, they, for a long while, gained no advantage. On 
the contrary, many of their men were wounded, and taken down 
below. 

The darkness Of the night prevented both parties from seeing 
distinctly, which was rather in favour of the assailants. Many 
climbed over the fortress of piled-up furniture, and were killed 
as soon as they appeared on the other side, and, at last, 
the only ammunition used was against those who made this 
rash attempt. For four long hours did this assault and defence 
continue, until daylight came, and then the plan of assault was 
altered : they again brought up the poles, hammered the pieces 
of furniture into fragments, and gained ground. The defenders 
were worn out with fatigue, but flinched not ; they knew that 
their lives, and the lives of those dearest to them, were at stake, 
and they never relaxed their exertions ; still the criminals, with 

14 * 


322 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


Silvio at their head, progressed, the distance between the 
parties gradually decreased, and there was but one massive 
chest of drawers now defending the landing-place, and over 
which there was a constant succession of blows from long poles 
and cutlasses, returned with the bullets from their pistols. 

“We must now fight for our lives/ 7 exclaimed Gascoigne to 
Easy, “ for what else can we do ?” 

“ Do ? — get on the roof and fight there, then,” replied Jack. 

“ By-the-bye, that’s well thought of, Jack,” said Gascoigne. 
“ Mesty, up and see if there is any place we can retreat to in 
case of need.” 

Mesty hastened to obey, and soon returned with a report that 
there was a trap-door leading into the loft under the roof, and 
that they could draw the ladder up after them. 

“Then we may laugh at them,” cried Jack. “Mesty, stay 
here while I and Gascoigne assist the ladies up,” explaining to 
the Rebieras and to their domestics why they went. 

Easy and Gascoigne hastened to the signora and Agnes, con- 
ducted them up the ladder into the loft, and requested them to 
have no fear ; they then returned to the defences on the stairs, 
and joined their companions. They found them hard pressed, 
and that there was little chance of holding out much longer ; 
but the stairs were narrow, and the assailants could not bring 
their force against them. Rut now, as the defences were nearly 
destroyed, although the convicts could not reach them with 
their knives, they brought up a large supply of heavy stones, 
whjch they threw with great force and execution. Two of 
Don Rebiera’s men and Don Martin were struck down, and this 
new weapon proved most fatal. 

“ We must retreat, Jack,” said Gascoigne, “the stones can 
do no harm where we are going to. What think you, Don 
Philip?” 

“ I agree with you ; let those who are wounded be first 
carried up, and then we will follow.” 

This was effected, and as soon as the wounded men were car 
ried up the ladder, and the arms taken up to prevent their fall- 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


323 


ing into the hands of the assailants, for they were now of little 
use to them, the ammunition being exhausted, the whole body 
went into the large room which contained the trap-door of the 
loft, and, as soon as they were up, they drew the ladder after 
them. They had hardly effected this, when they were followed 
with the yells and shoutings of the galley-slayes, who had 
passed the last barriers, and thought themselves sure of their 
prey : but they were disappointed — they found them more 
secure than ever. 

Nothing could exceed the rage of Don Silvio at the pro- 
tracted resistance of the party, and the security of their retreat. 
To get at them was impossible, so he determined to set fire to 
the room, and suffocate them, if he could do no otherwise. He 
gave his directions to his men, who rushed down for straw, but 
in so doing, he carelessly passed under the trap-door, and 
Mesty, who had carried up with him two or three of the stones, 
dashed one down on the head of Don Silvio, who fell immediate- 
ly. He was carried away, but his orders were put in execu- 
tion ; the room was filled with straw and fodder, and lighted. 
The effects were soon felt ; the trap-door had been shut, but 
the heat and smoke burst through ; after a time, the planks 
and rafters took fire, and their situation was terrible. A small 
trap-window in the roof, on the side of the house was knocked 
open, and gave them a temporary relief ; but now the rafters 
burned and crackled, and the smoke burst on them in thick 
columns. They could not see, and with difficulty could breathe. 
Fortunately the room below that which had been fired was but 
one out of four on the attics, and, as the loft they were in 
spread over the whole of the roof, they were able to remove far 
from it. The house was slated with massive slate of some hun- 
dred weight each, and it was not found possible to remove them 
so as to give air, although frequent attempts were made. Donna 
Rebiera sank exhausted in the arms of her husband, and Agnes 
fell into those of our hero, who, enveloped in the smoke, kissed 
her again and again ; and she, poor girl, thinking that they 
must all mevitably perish, made no scruple, in what she sup- 


324 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


posed lier last moment, of returning these proofs of her ardent 
attachment. 

“ Massa Easy, help me here, — Massa Gascoigne, come here. 
Now heab wid all your might ; when we get one off we get 
plenty.” 

Summoned by Mesty, Jack and Gascoigne put their 
shoulders to one of the lower slates ; it yielded — was dis- 
engaged, and slid down with a loud rattling below. The 
ladies were brought to it, and their heads put outside ; they 
soon recovered ; and now that they had removed one, they 
found no difficulty in removing others. In a few minutes 
they were all with their heads in the open air, but still the 
house was on fire below, and they had no chance of escape. 
It was while they were debating upon this point, and con- 
sulting as to their chance of safety, that a breeze of wind 
wafted the smoke that issued from the roof away from them, 
and they beheld the detachment of troops making up to the 
house ; a loud cheer was given, and attracted the notice of 
the soldiers. They perceived Easy and his companions ; the 
house was surrounded and entered in an instant. 

The galley-slaves who were in the house, searching for the 
treasure reported by Don Silvio to be concealed, were captured 
or killed, and in five minutes, the troops had possession. But 
how to assist those above was the difficulty. The room below 
was in flames, and burning fiercely. There were no ladders 
that could reach so high, and there were no means of getting 
to them. The commandant made signs from below, as if to 
ask what he was to do. 

“I see no chance,” observed Don Philip, mournfully. “Easy, 
my dear fellow, and you, Gascoigne, I am sorry that the feuds 
of our family should have brought you to such a dreadful 
death ; but what can be done ?” 

“I don’t know,” replied Jack, “unless we could get 
ropes.” 

“You quite sure, Massa Easy, that all galley-rascals below 
gone ?” asked Mesty. 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


325 


“ Yes,” replied Easy, “ you may see that ; look at some 
of them bound there, under charge of the soldiers.” 

“ Den, sar, I tink it high time we go too.” 

“So do I, Mesty ; but how ?” 

“ How ? stop a little.” 

“ Come, help me, Massa Easy ; dis board (for the loft was 
floored) is loose ; come help all of you.” 

They all went, and with united strength pulled up the board. 

“ Now, strike like hell ! — and drive down the plaster,” said 
Mesty, commencing the operation. 

In a few minutes they had beaten an opening into one of 
the rooms below not on fire, pulled up another board, and 
Mesty having fetched the ladder, they all descended in safety, 
and, to the astonishment of the commandant of the troops, 
walked out of the door of the house, those who had been 
stunned with the stones having so far recovered as to require 
little assistance. 

The soldiers shouted as they saw them appear, supporting 
the females. The commanding officer, who was an intimate 
friend of Don Philip, flew to his arms. The prisoners were 
carefully examined by Mesty, and Don Silvio was not among 
them. He might, however, be among the dead who were left in 
the house, which now began to burn furiously. The galley-slaves 
who were captured amounted in number to forty-seven. Their 
dead they could not count. The major part of the plunder, 
and the carts, were still where they had been drawn up. 

As soon as the culprits had been secured, the attention of 
the troops was directed to putting out the flames, but their 
attempts were ineffectual ; the mansion was burned to the 
bare walls, and but little of the furniture saved ; indeed, the 
major part of it had been destroyed in the attack made by Don 
Silvio and his adherents. 

Leaving directions with Pedro and his people, that the 
property collected by the miscreants should be restored to the 
owners, Don Rebiera ordered the horses, and with the whole 
party put himself under the protection of the troops, who, as 


326 


MB. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


soon as they had been refreshed, and taken some repose, bent 
their way back to Palermo with the galley-slaves, bound and 
linked together in a long double row. 

They halted when they had gone half-way, and remained 
for the night. The next day, at noon, Don Rebiera and his 
family were once more in their palazzo, and our two midshipmen 
and Mesty took their leave, and repaired on board to make 
themselves a little less like chimney-sweepers. 

Captain Wilson was not out of the ship. Jack made his 
report, and then went down below, very much pleased at what 
had passed, especially as he would have another long yarn for 
the governor on his return to Malta. 


CHAPTER XXXII. 

IN WHICH OUR HERO AND GASCOIGNE OUGHT TO BE ASHAMED OF 
THEMSELVES, AND DID FEEL, WHAT MIGHT BE CALLED MIDSHIPMITE 
COMPUNCTION. 

The Aurora continued three weeks at Palermo, during which 
the most active search had been made for the remainder of the 
galley slaves, and some few had been captured, but still Don 
Silvio, and a considerable number, were at large ; and it was 
said that they had retired to the fastnesses in the mountains. 
Our hero was constantly on shore at Don Rebiera’s house, and, 
after what had passed, he was now looked upon as soon to 
become a member of the family. The difference of religion was 
overlooked by Don Rebiera and the relations — by all but the 
confessor, Father Thomaso, who now began to agitate and ful- 
minate into the ears of the Donna Rebiera all the pains and 
penalties attending heretical connection, such as excommunica- 
tion and utter damnation. The effects of his remonstrances 
were soon visible, and Jack found that there was constraint on 
the part of the old lady, tears on the part of Agnes, and all 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


321 


father confessors heartily wished at the devil ten times a-day, 
on the part of Don Philip and his brother. At last he wormed 
the truth out of Agnes, who told her tale, and wept bitterly. 

“Ned, I don’t much like the appearance of things,” observed 
Jack ; “ I must get rid of that Father Thomaso.” 

“ You’ll find that rather difficult,” observed Gascoigne ; 
“ besides, if you were rid of him you would have his place filled 
up with another.” 

“ He has frightened that poor old woman into the dismals, 
and she has the pains of purgatory on her already. I shall go 
and talk to Mesty.” 

“ How can Mesty help you ?” 

“ I don’t know, but you can’t ; so, for want of better advice, 
I’ll try the Ashantee.” 

Our hero went to Mesty, and laid the difficult affair open to 
him. 

“ I see,” said Mesty, showing his filed teeth, “ you want him 
skull.” 

“No, I don’t Mesty ; but I want him out of the way.” 

“ How that possible, Massa Easy ? — ’ship sail day after to- 
morrow. Now ’pose I ab time, I soon manage all dat. Stop 
a little.” 

“ Confound it 1 but there’s no stopping,” replied Jack. 

“ Suppose, Massa Easy, you get leave go on shore — not come 
off again.” 

“ That will be deserting, Mesty.” 

“ By holy poker, I ab it — you go on shore and break your 
leg.” 

“ Break my leg ! — break my leave, you mean ?” 

“No, Massa Easy — you break your leg — den captain leave 
you shore, and leave me to take care of you.” 

“ But why should I break my leg, and how am I to break 
my leg ?” 

“ Only pretend break leg, Massa Easy. Go talk Massa Don 
Philip, he manage all that. Suppose man break his leg iu 
seven pieces, it is not possible to take him board.” 


828 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


“ Seven pieces, Mesty ! that’s rather toor many. However 
I’ll think of this.” 

Jack then went back and consulted Gascoigne, who approved 
of Mesty’s advice, and thought the scheme feasible. 

“ If we could only pretend that we were thrown out of a 
caricola, you break your leg, a compound fracture of course — I 
break my arm — both left on shore at sick quarters, with Mesty 
• to take care of us.” 

“ Capital, indeed,” replied Jack ; “ I really would not mind 
it if it really took place ; at all events we’ll overturn the 
caricola.” 

“ But shall we get leave the last day ?” 

“ Yes, it’s two days since I have been on shore, for I have 
not liked to go to Don Rebiera’s since what Agnes told me. 
Besides, my clothes are all on shore, and that will be an excuse 
for a few hours.” 

Our two midshipmen applied for leave the next morning to 
be off in the afternoon. The first-lieutenant gave them permis- 
sion. They hastened to the hotel, sent for Don Philip, and 
made him a party to their plan. He readily promised his 
assistance, for he had resolved that our hero should marry his 
sister, and was fearful of the effect of his absence, coupled with 
Friar Thomaso’s influence over his mother. He went to the 
surgeon of his regiment, who immediately entered into the 
scheme. 

Our two midshipmen got into a caricola, rattled up and 
down the streets, and perceiving Captain Wilson at his window, 
flogged the horse into a gallop : when abreast of the barracks, 
Jack ran the wheel against a bank, and threw himself and 
Gascoigne out. Midshipmen are never hurt by these accidents, 
• but fortunately for the success of the enterprise their faces were 
cut and bruised. Don Philip was standing by : he called the 
men to pick up our two scamps, carried them into the barracks, 
and sent for the surgeons, who undressed them, put Jack’s left 
leg into a multitude of splints, and did the same to Gascoigne’s 
arm. They were then put to bed, their contused faces, with 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


329 


the blood, left in statu quo, while Don Philip sent an orderly, 
as from the commandant, to Captain Wilson, to acquaint him 
that two of his officers had been thrown out of a caricola, and 
were lying dangerously hurt at the barracks. 

“ Good heavens, it must be Mr. Easy and Mr. Gascoigne I” 
said Captain Wilson, when the intelligence was communicated ; 
“ I saw them galloping down the street like two madmen just 
now. Coxswain, take the gig on board, and tell the surge vn 
to come on shore immediately, and bring him up to me at tie 
barracks.” 

Captain Wilson then put on his hat, buckled on his sword, 
and hastened to ascertain the extent of the injury. Don Philip 
kept out of the way, but the captain was ushered into the room 
by one of the officers, where he found, in two beds, our two 
midshipmen stretched out, the surgeon of the forces and the 
regimental surgeon in consultation between them, while attend- 
ants were standing by each bed with restoratives. The medical 
gentlemen saluted Captain Wilson, and looked very grave, 
talked about fractures, contusions, injuries, in the most intermi- 
nable manner — hoped that Mr. Easy would recover — but had 
doubts. The other gentleman might do well with care ; that 
is, as far as his arm was concerned, but there appeared to be a 
concussion of the brain. Captain Wilson looked at the cut and 
blood-smeared faces of the two young men, and waited with 
anxiety the arrival of his own surgeon, who came at last, puffin 
ing with the haste he had made, and received the report of the 
brothers of the faculty. 

The leg of Mr. Easy fractured in two places — had been set 
— bone protruding — impossible to move him. Gascoigne, arm, 
compound fracture — contusion of the brain not certain. Now 
that all this would have been discovered to be false if the sur-. 
geon had been able to examine, is true ; but how could he not 
credit the surgeon of the forces and the regimental surgeon, 
and how could he put the young men to fresh tortures by 
removing splints and unsetting limbs ? Politeness, if nothing 
else, prevented his so doing, for it would have been as much as 


330 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


to say that either he did not credit t'heir report, or that he 
doubted their skills He looked at our hero and his companion, 
who kept their eyes closed, and breathed heavily with their 
mouths open, put on a grave face, as well as his brothers in 
the art, and reported to Captain Wilson. 

“ But when can they be moved, Mr. Daly ?” inquired the 
latter ; “I cannot wait ; we must sail to-morrow, or the next 
day at the farthest.” 

The surgeon, as in duty bound, put the question to the 
others, who replied that there would be great risk in moving 
before the fever, which might be expected the next day, and 
which might last ten days ; but that Captain Wilson had 
better not think of removing them, as they should have every 
care and attention where they were, and could rejoin the ship 
at Malta. Mr. Daly, the surgeon, agreed that this would be 
the most prudent step, and Captain Wilson then gave his 
consent. 

That being settled, he walked up to the bed of Gascoigne, 
and spoke to him; but Gascoigne knew that he was to have a 
concussion of the brain, and he made no reply, nor gave any 
signs of knowing that Captain Wilson was near him. He then 
went to our hero, who, at the sound of Captain Wilson’s voice, 
slowly opened his eyes without moving his head, and appeared 
to recognize him. 

“ Are you in much pain, Easy ?” said the captain kindly. 

Easy closed his eyes again, and murmured, “ Mesty, Mesty I” 

“ He wants his servant, the ship’s corporal, sir,” said the sur- 
geon. 

“ Well,” replied Captain Wilson, “he had better have him : 
he is a faithful fellow, and will nurse him well. When you go 
on board, Mr. Daly, desire the first-lieutenant to send Mesty on 
shore with Mr. Gascoigne’s and Mr. Easy’s chests, and his own 
bag and hammock. Good heavens ! I would not for a thousand 
pounds that this accident had occurred. Poor foolish boys — 
they run in couples, and if one’s in a scrape the other is sure to 
share it. Gentlemen, I return you many thanks for your kind- 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


331 


ness, and I must accept of your promised care for my unfortu- 
nate officers. I sail to-morrow at daylight. You will oblige 
me by informing their friends, the Rebieras, of their mischance, 
as I am sure they will contribute all they can to their comfort.” 
So saying, Captain Wilson bowed and quitted the room, fol- 
lowed by the surgeon. 

As soon as the door was closed, the two midshipmen turned 
their heads round and looked at each other, but they were 
afraid to speak at first, in case of the return of the surgeon. 
As soon as it was announced to them that Captain Wilson and 
Mr. Daly were outside the barrack gates, our hero commenced — 
“ Do you know, Ned, that my conscience smites me, and if it 
had not been that I should have betrayed those who wish to 
oblige us, when poor Captain Wilson appeared so much hurt 
and annoyed at our accident, I was very near getting up and 
telling him of the imposition, to relieve his mind.” 

“I. agree with you, Jack, and I felt much the same — but 
what’s done cannot be undone. We must now keep up the 
imposition for the sake of those who, to help us, have deceived 
him.” 

“ I don’t think that you would find an English surgeon who 
would have consented to such an imposition.” 

“No, that is certain; but after all, it is an imposition that 
has hurt nobody.” 

“ Oh, I do not wish to moralize — but I repent of my share 
in the deceit; and had it to be done over again, I would not 
consent to it.” 

“Not even for ? but I won’t mention her name in 

barracks.” 

“ I don’t know,” replied Jack; “ but let’s say no more about 
it, and thank these gentlemen for their kindness.” . 

“Yes, but we must keep it up until we see the Aurora under 
all sail.” 

“ And longer too,” replied Jack; “we must not let the affair 
get wind even on shore. We must not recover quickly, but 
still appear to recover. Don Rebiera and his wife must be de- 


332 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


eeived. I have a plot in my head, but I cannot work it out 
clear until I see Mesty.” 

Don Philip now came in. He had seen Captain Wilson, who 
had requested him to look after the two invalids, and stated 
his intention to sail the next morning. They consulted with 
him, and it was agreed that no one should be acquainted with 
the real fact but his brother Martin, and that all Palermo 
should be as much deceived as Captain Wilson, for if not, it 
would put Father Thomaso on the qui vive, and make him ful- 
minate more than ever. Our midshipmen ate an excellent din- 
ner, and then remained in bed conversing until it was time to 
go to sleep; but long before that, Mesty had made his appear- 
ance with their clothes. The eyes of the Ashantee said all that 
was necessary — he never spoke a word, but unlashed his ham- 
mock and lay down in a corner, and they were soon all three 
asleep. 

The next morning Captain Wilson called to ascertain how 
our hero and his companion were, but the room had been dark- 
ened, and he could not see their faces plainly. Easy thanked 
him for his kindness in allowing Mesty to attend them, and 
having received his orders as to their joining the ship as soon 
as they recovered, and having promised to be very cautious in 
their benaviour, and keep out of all scrapes, he wished them a 
speedy recovery, and departed. 

In little more than half an hour afterwards, Mesty, who had 
been peeping out of the shutters, suddenly threw them open 
with a loud laugh. 

The Aurora was under way, with studding sails below and 
aloft, standing out of the roads. J ack and Gascoigne got up, 
threw off the splints, and danced about in their shirts. As 
soon as they were quiet again, Mesty said in a grave tone, 
“ Den why you stay at sea, Massa Easy ?” 

“ Very true, Mesty, Pve asked myself that question often 
enough lately ; because Pm a fool, I suppose.” 

“ And I, because I can’t help it,” replied Gascoigne ; “ never 
mind, we are on shore now, and I look for a famous cruise ” 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


333 


“ But first we must see what the ground is we are to cruise 
on,” replied Jack ; “ so, Mesty, let us have a palaver, as they 
say in your country.” 

The two midshipmen got into their beds, and Mesty sat on 
the chest between them, looking as grave as a judge. The 
question was, how to get rid of the padre Thomaso. Was he 
to be thrown over the molehead to the fishes — or his skull 
broke — was Mesty’s knife to be resorted to — was he to be kid- 
napped or poisoned — or were fair means to be employed — per- 
suasion, bribery ? Every one knows how difficult it is to get 
rid of a priest. 

As our hero and Gascoigne were not Italians, they thought 
that bribery would be the more English-like way of doing the 
thing ; so they composed a letter, to be delivered by Mesty to 
the friar, in which Jack offered to Father Thomaso the mode- 
rate sum of one thousand dollars, provided he would allow the 
marriage to proceed, and not frighten the old lady with eccle- 
siastical squibs and crackers. 

As Mesty was often on shore with Jack, and knew the friar 
very well by sight, it was agreed that the letter should be con- 
fided to his charge ; but, as it was not consistent that a person 
in such a state as our hero was represented to be should sit up 
and write letters, the delivery was deferred for a few days, 
when, after waiting that time, Mesty delivered the letter to the 
friar, and made signs that he was to take back the answer. 
The friar beckoned him that he was to accompany him to his 
room, where he read the letter* and then again made signs to 
him to follow him. The friar led the way to his monastery, 
and as soon as Mesty was in his cell, he summoned another 
who could speak English to act as interpreter. 

“ Is your master recovering ?” 

“ Yes,” replied Mesty, “ he is at present doing well.” 

“ Have you served him long ?” 

“ No,” replied Mesty. 

“ Are you very fond of him ? does he treat you well, give 
you plenty of money ?” 


334 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


At these questions, the artful black conceived that there was 
something in the wind, and he therefore very quietly replied, 
“ I do not care much for him.” 

The friar fixed his keen eye upon Mesty, and perceived there 
was a savage look about the black, from which he augured 
that he was a man who would suit his purpose. 

“ Your master offers me a thousand dollars ; would you wish 
to gain this money for yourself ?” 

Mesty grinned, and showed his sharp-filed teeth. 

" It would make me a rich man in my own country/' 

“ It would,” replied the friar ; “ now you shall have, it, if 
you will only give your master a small powder.” 

“I understand,” replied Mesty ; “hab those things in my 
country.” 

“ Well — do you consent ? — if so, I will write the letter to 
get the money.” 

“ Suppose they find me out ?” replied Mesty. 

“ You will be safe, and you shall be sent away as soon as 
possible — say, will you consent ?” 

“ The whole thousand dollars ?” 

“ Every one of them.” 

“ Den give me the powder ?” 

“ Stay a little,” replied the friar, who went out of the cell, 
and, in about ten minutes, returned |frith an answer to our 
hero’s letter, and a paper containing a greyish powder. 

“ Give him this in his soup or any thing — spread it on his 
meat, or mix it up with his sugar if he eats an orange.” 

“ I see,” replied Mesty. 

“ The dollars shall be yours. I swear it on the holy 
cross.” 

Mesty grinned horribly, took his credentials, and then asked, 
“ When I come again?” 

“ As soon as you have received the money bring it to me at 
Don Rebiera’s — then give the powder : as soon as it is given 
you must let me know, for you must not remain in Palermo. I 
will myself conduct you to a place of safety ” 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


335 


Mesty then quitted the cell, and was shown out of the 
monastery. 

“By de holy poker he one d n rascal 1” muttered Mesty, 

as he was once more in the open air. “ But stop a little.” 

The Ashantee soon arrived at the barracks, and repeated 
the whole of the conference between him and the Friar 
Thomaso. 

“ It must be poison, of course,” observed Gascoigne ; “ sup- 
pose we try it upon some animal ?” 

“ No, Massa Gascoigne,” replied Mesty, “I try it myself, by- 
and-bye. Now what we do ?” 

“ I must give you the order for the thousand dollars, Mesty,” 
replied Jack. “The rascal here writes to me, that for that 
sum, he will consent not only not to oppose me, but agrees 
to assist my cause ; but the great question is, whether he will 
keep his word with you, Mesty ; if not, I shall lose my money. 
So therefore we must now have another palaver, and argue the 
point.” 

The point was argued between Jack and Gascoigne. A 
thousand dollars was a large sum, but Jack’s father was a 
philosopher. After many pros and cons, it was at last decided 
that the money should be given to Mesty ; but that Mesty 
should state, when he took the money to the friar, that he 
had. administered the powder, and claim it when he pre- 
sented it. 

The next day, the order for the money was given to Mesty, 
and he went to the Friar Thomaso with it. The friar 
hastened with Mesty to the Monastery, and sent for the 
interpreter. 

“You have given it ?” inquired the friar. 

“ Yes — not one hour ago. Here de order for de money.” 

“You must run for the money before he is dead, for the 
powder is very rapid.” 

“ And me,” replied Mesty, apparently much alarmed, “ where 
am I to go ?” 

“ As soon as you bring the money here, you must go back to 


336 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


the barracks. Remain there till he is dead, and then return 
here. I will have all ready, and take you, as soon as it is 
dusk, to a monastery of our order in the mountains, where 
no one will think of looking for you, till the affair is blown over ; 
and then I will find you a passage in some vessel out of the 
island.” 

Mesty hastened for the money, and taking it in a large 
bag to the monastery, delivered it to the friar’s charge, and 
then returned to the barracks to Easy and Gascoigne. It 
was agreed that he should go with the friar, who would 
probably remain away some time ; indeed, Mesty insisted upon 
so doing. Mesty stayed two hours, and then returned about 
dusk to the monastery, and reported the death of our hero. 
He remained there until it was dark, and then the friar ordered 
him to tie the bag of dollars to his saddle-bow. They mounted 
two mules, which stood all ready caparisoned, and quitted 
Palermo. 

In the morning, Don Philip, as usual, made his appearance, 
and told our hero that the friar had been summoned away by 
the abbot, and would not return for some time. 

“I came .to tell you this news,” said Don Philip, “as I 
thought it would please you ; the sooner you are now well, the 
better. I mean to propose your being both removed to my 
father’s palazzo, and then you can recover your lost ground 
during the confessor’s absence.” 

“ And I have the means,” replied Jack, showing the friar’s 
letter. Don Philip read it with astonishment, but was still 
more surprised when he heard the whole story from Jack. He 
was for a time silent : at last he said, — 

“I am sorry for your poor black.” 

“ Why so ?” replied Jack. 

“ You will never see him again, depend upon it. A thousand 
dollars would sign the death-warrant of a thousand blacks; but 
there is another reason — they will put him out of the way that 
he may not give evidence. Where is the powder ?” 

“ Mesty has it ; he would not part with it. v 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


33 1 

•* He is a shrewd fellow, that black ; he may be too much for 
the friar,” replied Don Philip. 

“ He means mischief, Fm sure,” replied Gascoigne. 

“ Still I feel a great deal of alarm about him,” replied Easy ; 
“ I wish now that I had not let him go.” 

“ Are you sure that he went ?” 

“No, I am not ; but the friar told him that he should take 
him to the mountains as soon as it was dark.” 

“ And probably he will,” replied Don Philip, “ as the best 
piace to get rid of him. However, the whole of this story must 
be told both to my father and my mother ; to the former, that 
he may take the right measures, and to my mother, that it may 
open her eyes. Give me the copy of the letter you wrote to the 
friar, and then I shall have it all.” 

The report, of the accident which had occurred to Easy and 
Gascoigne had been spread and fully believed throughout 
Palermo. Indeed, as usual, it had been magnified, and asserted 
that they could not recover. To Agnes only had the case been 
imparted in confidence by Don Philip, for her distress at the first 
intelligence had been so great that her brother could not 
conceal it. 

Two days after Don Philip had made his parents acquainted 
with villany of the friar, the midshipmen were transported to the 
palazzo, much to the surprise of every body, and much to the 
renown of the surgeons, who were indemnified for their duplicity 
and falsehood by an amazing extension of their credit as skil- 
ful men. 

After their arrival at the palazzo, Don Rebiera was also en- 
trusted with the secret, but it went no farther. As now there 
was no particular hurry for our hero to get well, he was con- 
tented and happy in the society of Agnes and her parents ; the 
old lady, after she had been informed of the conduct of Friar 
Thomaso, having turned round in our hero’s favour, and made a 
vow never to have a confessor in the house again. Jack and 
Gascoigne were now as happy as could be ; all their alarm was 
about Mesty, for whose return they were most anxious. 

15 


338 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


To Don Rebiera Jack made known formally his intentions 
with regard to Agnes. He fully satisfied him as to his qualifi- 
cations and his property, and Don Rebiera was fully aware of 
his debt of gratitude to our hero. But all he required was the 
consent of Jack’s father, and until this was obtained, he would 
not consent to the marriage taking place. J ack attempted to 
argue the point ; his father, he said, had married without con- 
sulting him, and therefore he had a right to marry without con- 
sulting his father. But Don Rebiera, not having any acquaint- 
ance with the rights of man and equality, did not feel the full 
force of Jack’s argument, and made it a sine qua non that his 
parents should write and consent to the alliance before it took 
place. 


CHAPTER XXXIII. 

IN WHICH MESTY SHOULD BE CALLED THROUGHOUT MEPHISTOPHELES, 
FOR IT ABOUNDS IN BLACK CLOAKS, DISGUISES, DAGGERS, AND 
DARK DEEDS. 

On the fourth evening after the removal of our two midshipmen 
to the palazzo of Don Rebiera, as they were sitting in company 
with Agnes and Don Philip in their own room, a friar made his 
appearance at the door. They all started, for by his height 
they imagined him to be the friar Thomaso, but no one addressed 
him. The friar shut the door without saying a word, and then 
lifting up his cowl, which had been drawn over it, discovered 
the black face of Mesty. Agnes screamed, and all sprang from 
their seats at this unusual and unexpected apparition. Mesty 
grinned, and there was that in his countenance which said that 
he had much to communicate. 

“ Where is the friar, Mesty ?” inquired Easy. * 

“ Stop a little, Massa — suppose we lock door first, and den 
l tell all.” 

Taking this precaution, Mesty threw off the friar’s gown, and 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


889 


appeared in his own dress, with the bag of dollars slung round 
his body. 

“Now, Massa Easy, I hab a long tory to tell — so I tink I 
better begin at the beginning.” 

“It is the most approved method,” replied Jack ; “ but stop 
when I hold up my finger, that we may translate what you say 
to the lady and Don Philip.” 

“ Dat all right, sar. Friar and I get on two mule as soon 
as it quite dark. He made me carry all tousand dollars — and 
we ride out of town. We go up mountain and mountain, but 
the moon get up shine and we go on cheek by jowl — he nebber 
say one word, and I nebber say one word, ’cause I no speak 
his lingo, and he no understand my English. About two 
o’clock in de morning, we stop at a house and stay dere till 
eight o’clock, and den we go on again all next day, up all 
mountain, only stop once, eat a bit bread and drink lily wine. 
Second night come on, and den we stop again, and people bow 
very low to him, and woman bring in rabbit for make supper. 
I go in the kitchen, woman make stew smell very nice, so I nod 
my head, and I say very good, and she make a face, and throw 
on table black loaf of bread and garlic, and make sign dat for 
my supper ; good enough for black fellow, and dat rabbit stew 
for friar. Den I say to myself, stop a little ; suppose friar hab 
all de rabbit, I tink I give him a lily powder.” 

“ The powder, Mesty ?” exclaimed Jack. 

“ What does he say ?” inquired Don Philip. 

Gascoigne translated all that Mesty had communicated. 
The interest of the narrative now became exciting. Mesty 
continued : — 

“Well, Massa Easy, den woman she go for dish to put stew 
in, and I take de powder and drop it in de pot, and den I sit 
down again and eat black bread, she say good enough for black 
man. She tir up de stew once more, and den she pour it out 
into dish, and take it to friar. He lick um chops, by all de 
powers, and he like um so well he pick all de bones, and wipe 
up gravy with him bread. You tink it very nice, Massa Friar, 


340 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


tink I ; but stop a little. After be drink a whole bottle of 
wine, he tell em bring mules to de door, and he put him hands 
on de woman head, and dat de way he pay for him supper. 

“ The moon shone bright, and we go up all mountain, always 
go up, and ’bout tw T o hour, he get off him mule and he put him 
hand so, and set down on de rock. He twist, and he turn, and 
he groan, for half an hour, and den he look at me, as much as 
to say, you black villain, you do this ? for he not able to speak, 
and den I pull out de paper of de powder, and I show him, 
and make him sign he swallow it : he look again, and I laugh 
at him — and he die.” 

“ Oh, Mesty, Mesty,” exclaimed our hero ; “ you should not 
have done that, — there will mischief come from it.” 

“Now he dead, Massa Easy, so much less mischief.” 

Gascoigne then interpreted to Don Philip and Agnes, the 
former of whom looked very grave, and the latter terrified. 

“Let him go on,” said Don Philip ; “I am most anxious to 
hear what he did with the body.” 

Mesty, at the request of our hero, proceeded : “ Den I 
thought what I should do, and I said I would hide him, and I 
tink I take his coat for myself — so I pull off him coat and I 
pull off all his oder clothes — he not wear many — and I take 
the body in my arm and carry him where I find a great split 
in de rock above all road. I throw him in, and den I throw 
plenty large pieces rock on him till I no see him any more ; 
den I take de two mules and get on mine wid de dollars, and 
lead the other three four mile, till I come to a large wood — 
take off him saddle and bridle, turn him adrift. Den I tear up 
all clothes all in lily bits, hide one piece here, noder piece dere, 
and de saddle and bridle in de bush. All right now, I say ; so 
I put on friar cloak, hide my face, get on my mule, and den I 
look where I shall go — so I say, I not be in dis road anyhow. 
I passed through wood till I find nother. I go ’bout two mile 
— moon go down, all dark, and five six men catch hold my 
bridle, and they all got arms, so I do nothing — they speak to 
me, but I no answer, and nebber show my face. They find all 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


341 


dollars (d — m um) fast enough, and they lead me away through 
the wood. Last we come to large fire in de wood, plenty of 
men lie 'bout, some eat and some drink. They pull me off, and 
I hold down my head and fold my arms, just like friar do. 
They bring me along to one man, and pour out all my dollar 
before him. He give some order, and they take me away, and 
I peep through the cloak, and 1 say to myself, he that d — na 
galley-slave rascal Hon Silvio." 

“ Hon Silvio 1” cried Jack. 

“What does he say of Hon Silvio ?" demanded Hon Philip. 

Mesty's narrative was again translated, and he continued. 

u Hey lead me away ’bout fifty yards, tie me to tree, and 
, den they leave me, and dey all drink and make merry, neber 
offer me any ting, so I hab noting den to eat ; I eat de ropes 
and gnaw them through, and den I stay there two hour until all 
go asleep, and all quiet ; for I say to myself, stop a little. Hen 
when dey all fast asleep, I take out my knife and I crawl 'long de 
ground, as we do in our country sometime — and den I stop and 
look 'bout me ; no man watch but two, and dey look out for 
squad, not look in board where I was. I crawl 'gain till I lay 
down longside that d — n galley slave Hon Silvio. He lie fast 
asleep with my bag thousand dollars under him head. So I 
tink, 1 you not hab dem long, you rascal.' I look round — all 
right, and I drive my knife good aim into him begirt, and press 
toder hand on him mouth, but he make no noise ; he struggle 
little and look up, and den I throw off de head of de gown and 
show him my black face, and he look and he try to speak ; but 
I stop dat, for down go my knife again, and de d — n galley 
slave dead as herring." 

“ Stop, Mesty, we must tell this to Hon Philip,” said Gas- 
coigne. 

“ Head, Hon Silvio dead ! well, Mesty, we are eternally 
obliged to you, for there was no safety for my father while he 
was living. Let him go on.” 

“ So when I put de knife through his body, I lie down by 
him, as if noting had happened, for ten minute, and den I take 


342 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


tie bag of dollars from under him head, and den I feel him all 
over, and I find him. pistols and him purse, which I hab here, all 
gold. So I take them and I look — all asleep, and I crawl back 
to de tree. Den I stay to tink a little 5 de man on watch come 
up and look at me, but he tink all right and he go away again. 
Lucky ting, by de power, dat I go back to tree. I "wait again, 
and den I crawl and crawl till I clear of all, and den I take to 
my heel and run for um life, till daylight come, and den I so 
tired I lie down in bush : I stay in bush all day, and den I set 
off again back here, for I find road and know my way. I not 
eat den for one day and one night, and come to house where I 
put my head in and find woman there. I not able to speak, so 
I help myself, and not show my face. She not like dat and . 
make a bobbery, but I lift up my cloak and show my black face 
and white teeth, and den she tink me de debil. She run out of 
de house, and I help myself very quick, and den set off and 
come close here yesterday morning. I hide myself all day and 
come in at night, and now, Massa Easy, you ab all de whole 
truth — and you ab your tousand dollars — and you ab got rid of 
de rascal friar and de d — n galley slave, Don Silvio.” 

“Tell them all this, Ned,” said Jack, who, whilst Gascoigne 
was so employed, talked with Mesty. 

“ I was very much frightened for you, Mesty,” said Jack ; 

“ but still I thought you quite as cunning as the friar, and so it 
has turned out ; but the thousand dollars ought to be yours.” 

“No, sar,” replied Mesty, “the dollars not mine ; but I hab 
plenty of gold in Don Silvio’s purse — plenty, plenty of gold. I 
keep my property, Massa Easy, and you keep yours.” 

“ I’m afraid that this affair may be found out, Mesty ; the 
woman will spread the report of having been attacked by a 
black friar, and that will lead to suspicion, as the other friars 
of the convent knew that you left with Friar Thomaso.” 

“ So I tink dat, but when a man starve, he quite forget his 
thought.” 

“ I don’t blame you ; but now* I must talk to Don Philip.” 

“ Suppose you no objection, while you talk I eat something 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


343 


from the table then, Massa Easy, for I hungry enough to eat d e 
friar, mule and all.” 

11 Eat, my good fellow, and drink as much as you please.” 

The consultation between our two midshipmen and Don Philip 
was not long : they perceived the immediate necessity for the 
departure of Mesty, and the suspicion which would -attach to 
themselves. Don Philip and Agnes left them, to go to Don 
Rebiera, and make him acquainted with what had passed, and 
to ask his advice. 

When they went into the room, Don Rebiera immediately 
accosted his son. 

“ Have you heard, Philip, that Eriar Thomaso has returned 
at last ? — so the servants tell me.” 

“ The report may be fortunate,” replied Don Philip, “ but I 
have another story to tell you.” 

He then sat down and imparted to Don Rebiera all the adven- 
tures of Mesty. Don Rebiera was for some time in deep thought ; 
at last, he replied, — 

“ That Don Silvio is no more is fortunate, and the negro would 
be entitled to reward for his destruction — but for the friar, that 
is a bad business. The negro might remain and tell the whole 
story, and the facts might be proved by the evidence of Signor 
Easy, and the letters ; but what then ? we should raise the whole 
host of the clergy against our house, and we have suffered too 
much from them already ; the best plan would be the immediate 
departure, not only of the negro, but of our two young friends. 
The supposition of Friar Thomaso being here, and their depar- 
ture with their negro servant to rejoin their ship, will remove 
much suspicion and destroy all inquiry. They must be off im- 
mediately. Go to them, Philip, and point out to them the ab- 
solute necessity of this measure, and tell our young friend that 
I rigidly adhere to my promise, and as soon as he has his 
father’s sanction I will bestow upon him my daughter. In the 
mean time I will send down and see if a vessel can be chartered 
for Malta. 

Our hero and Gascoigne fully admitted the wisdom of this 


344 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


measure, and prepared for their departure ; indeed, now that 
Don Rebiera’s resolution had been made known to our hero, 
he cared more for obtaining his father’s consent than he did 
for remaining to enjoy himself at Palermo ; and before noon 
of the next day all was ready, the vessel had been procured, 
Jack took his leave of Agnes and her mother, and, accompanied 
by Don Rebiera and Don Philip, (for Don Martin was on duty 
a few miles from Palermo, ) went down to the beach, and having 
bid them farewell, embarked with Gascoigne and Mesty on 
board of the two-masted lateen which had been engaged, and 
before sunset not a steeple of Palermo was to be seen. 

“ What are you thinking of, Jack ?” said Gascoigne, after 
our hero had been silent half an hour. 

“ I have been thinking, Ned, that we are well out of it.” 

“So do I,” replied Gascoigne ; and here the conversation 
dropped for a time. 

“What are you thinking of now, Jack?” said Gascoigne 
after a long pause. 

“ Pve been thinking that I’ve a good story for the old 
governor.” 

“ Very true,” replied Gascoigne ; and both were again silent 
for some time. 

“ What are you thinking of now, Jack ?” said Gascoigne, 
after another long interval. 

“ Pve been thinking that I shall leave the service,” replied 
Jack. 

“ I wish you would take me with you,” replied Gascoigne 
with a sigh ; and again they were both in deep contemplation. 

“What are you thinking of now. Jack?” said Gascoigne 
again. 

“ Of Agnes,” replied our hero. 

“ Well, if that’s the case, I’ll call you when supper’s ready 
In the mean time I’ll go and talk with Mesty.” 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


345 


CHAPTER XXXIY. 

/ACK LEAVES THE SERVICE, IN WHICH HE HAD NO BUSINESS, AND 
GOES HOME TO MIND HIS OWN BUSINESS. 

On the fourth day they arrived at Malta, and our two midship- 
men, as soon as they had settled with the padrone of the 
vessel, went up to the government-house. They found the 
governor in the veranda, who held out both his hands, one to 
each. 

“ Glad to see you, my lads. Well, Jack, how’s the leg, all 
right ? don’t limp. And your arm, Gascoigne ?” 

“All right, sir, and as sound as ever it was,” replied they 
both. 

“ Then you’re in luck, and have made more haste than you 
deserve, after your mad pranks ; but now sit down, and I sup- 
pose, my friend Jack, you have a story to tell ine.” 

“ 0 yes, Sir Thomas, and a very long one.” 

“ Then I won’t have it now, for I expect people on business ; 
we’ll have it after dinner. Get your things up and take pos- 
session of your rooms. The Aurora sailed four days ago. 
You’ve had a wonderful recovery.” 

“Wonderful, sir!” replied our hero; “all Palermo rings 
with it.” 

“ Well, you may go now — I shall see you at dinner. Wilson . 
will be delighted when he hears that you have got round again, 
for he was low-spirited about it, I can tell you, which is more 
than you deserve.” 

“ He’s right there,” said our hero to Gascoigne, as they 
walked away. 

When dinner was over, Jack narrated to the governor the 
adventures of Mesty, with which he was much interested ; but 
when they were quite alone in the evening, the governor called 
our two midshipmen into the veranda, and said, 

“ Now, my lads, Pm not going to preach, as the saying is, 
15 * 


346 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


but I’ve been long enough in the world to know that a com- 
pound fracture of the leg is not cured in fourteen or sixteen 
days. I ask you to tell me the truth. Did not you deceive 
Captain Wilson on this point ?” 

“ I am ashamed to say that we did, sir,” replied Easy. 

“ How did you manage that, and why ?” 

Jack then went into further details relative to himself and 
his amour, stating his wish to be left behind, and all that had 
passed. 

“Well, there’s some excuse for you, but none for the sur- 
geons. If any surgeon here had played such a trick, I would 
have hung him, as sure as I’m governor. This affair of yours 
has become serious. Mr. Easy, we must have some conversa- 
tion on the matter to-morrow morning.” 

The next morning the packet from England was reported off 
the harbour’s mouth. After breakfast the letters were brought 
cn shore, and the governor sent for our hero. 

“ Mr. Easy, here are two letters for you ; I am sorry to say, 
with black seals. I trust that they do not bring the intelli- 
gence of the death of any very near relative.” 

Jack bowed without speaking, took the letters, and went to 
his room. The first he opened was from his father. 

“My dear John, 

“You will be much grieved to hear that your poor 
mother, after sitting in the corner for nearly two years waiting 
for the millennium, appeared to pine away ; whether from dis- 
appointment or not I do not know ; but at last, in spite of all 
Dr. Middleton could do, she departed this life ; and, as the 
millennium would not come to her as she expected, it is to be 
hoped she is gone to the millennium. She was a good wife, 
and I always let her have her own way. Dr. Middleton does 
not appear to be satisfied as to the cause of her death, and has 
wished to examine ; but I said no, for I am a philosopher, and 
it is no use looking for causes after effects ; but I have done 
since her death what she never would permit me to do during 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


341 


her life. I have had her head shaved, and examined it very 
carefully as a phrenologist, and most curiously has she proved 
’ the truth of the sublime science. I will give you the result. 
Determination, very prominent ; Benevolence, small ; Caution, 
extreme ; Yeneration, not very great ; Philoprogenitiveness, 
strange to say, is very large, considering she has but one child ; 
Imagination very strong : you know, my dear boy, she was 
always imagining some nonsense or another. Her other organs 
were all moderate. Poor dear creature ! she is gone, and we 
may well wail, for a better mother or a better wife never 
existed. And now, my dear boy, I must request that you call 
for your discharge, and come home as soon as possible. I can- 
not exist without you, and I require your assistance in the 
grand work I have in contemplation. The time is at hand, the 
cause of equality will soon triumph ; the abject slaves now hold 
up their heads ; I have electrified them with my speeches, but 
I am getting old and feeble ; I require my son to leave my 
mantle to, as one prophet did to another, and then I will, like 
him, ascend in glory. 

“Your affectionate Father, 

“ Nicodemus Easy.” 

From this it would appear, thought Jack, that my mother is 
dead, and that my father is mad. For some time our hero 
remained in a melancholy mood ; he dropped many tears to the 
memory of his mother, whom, if he had never respected, he had 
much loved ; and it was not till half an hour had elapsed, that 
he thought of opening the other letter. It was from Dr. 
Middleton. 

“ My dear Boy, 

“Although not a correspondent of yours, I take the 
right of having watched you through all your childhood, and 
from a knowledge of your disposition, to write you a few 
lines. That you have, by this time, discarded your father’s 
foolish, nonsensical philosophy, I am very sure. It wms I who 


348 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


advised your going away for that purpose, and 1 am sure, that, 
as a young man of sense, and the heir to a large property, you 
will before this have seen the fallacy of your father’s doctrines. 
Your father tells me that he has requested you to come home, 
and allow me to add any weight I may have with you, in per- 
suading you to do the same. It is fortunate for you that the 
estate is entailed, or you might soon be a beggar, for there io 
no saying what debts he might, in his madness, be guilty of 
He has already been dismissed from the magistracy by the 
lord-lieutenant, in consequence of his haranguing the discom 
tented peasantry, and, I may say, exciting them to acts of 
violence and insubordination. He has been seen dancing and 
hurraing round a stack fired by an incendiary. He has turhed 
away his keepers, and allowed all poachers to go over the 
manor. In short, he is not in his senses ; and, although I am 
far from advising coercive measures, I do consider that it is 
absolutely necessary that you should immediately return home, 
and lcfok after what will one day be your property. You have 
no occasion to follow the profession with eight thousand pounds 
per annum. You have distinguised yourself, — now make room 
for those who require it for their subsistence. God bless you 
I shall soon hope to shake hands with you. 

“ Yours most truly, 

“ G. Middleton.” 

There was matter for deep reflection in these two letters, and 
Jack never felt before how much his father had been in 
the wrong. That he had gradually been weaned from his 
ideas was true, but still he had, to a certain degree, clung to 
them, as we do to a habit ; but now he felt that his eyes were 
opened ; the silly, almost unfeeling letter of his father upon the 
occasion of his mother’s death, opened his eyes. For a long 
while Jack was in a melancholy meditation, and then casting* 
his eyes upon his watch, he perceived that it was almost dinner- 
time. That he could eat his dinner was certain, and he scorned 
to pretend to feel what he did not. He therefore dressed him- 


MR MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


349 


self and went down, grave, it is true, but not in tears. He 
spoke little at dinner, aDd retired as soon as it was over, pre- 
senting his two letters to the governor, and asking his advice 
for the next morning. Gascoigne followed him, and to him he 
confided his trouble ; and Ned, finding that Jack was very- 
low-spirited, consoled him to the best of his power, and brought 
a bottle of wine which he procured from the butler. Before 
they retired to bed, Jack had given his ideas to his friend, 
which were approved of, and wishing him a good night, he 
threw himself into bed, and was soon fast asleep. 

“ One thing is certain, my good fellow,” observed the gover- 
nor to- our hero, as he gave him back his letters at the break- 
fast table the next morning ; “ that your father is as mad as 
a March hare. I agree with that doctor, who appears a sensi- 
ble man, that you had better go home immediately.” 

“ And leave the service altogether, sir ?” replied Jack. 

“ Why, I must say, that I do not think you exactly fitted 
for it. I Shall be sorry to lose you, as you have a wonderful 
talent for adventure, and I shall have no more yarns to hear 
when you return : but, if I understand right from Captain 
Wilson, you were brought into the profession because he thought 
that the service might be of use in eradicating false notions, 
rather than from any intention or necessity of your following it 
up as a profession.” 

“ I suspect that was the case, sir,” replied Jack : “ as for my 
own part, I hardly know why I entered it.” 

“ To find a mare’s nest, my lad ; I’ve heard all about it ; but 
never mind that, the question is now about your leaving it, to 
look after your own property, and I think I may venture to say, 
that I can arrange all that matter at once, without referring 
to admiral or captain. I will be responsible for you, and you may 
go home in the packet, which sails on Wednesday for England.” 

“Thank you, Sir Thomas, I am much obliged to you,” re- 
plied Jack. 

“You, Mr. Gascoigne, I shall, of course, send out by the 
first opportunity to rejoin your ship.” 


350 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY 


“ Thank you, Sir Thomas, I am much obliged to you,” replied 
Gascoigne, making a bow. 

“ You’ll break no more arms, if you please, sir,” continued 
the governor ; “a man in love may have some excuse for break- 
ing his leg, but you had none.” 

“ I beg your pardon, sir ; if Mr. Easy was warranted in 
breaking his leg out of love, I submit that I could do no less 
than break my arm out of friendship.” 

11 Hold your tongue, sir, or I’ll break your head from the 
very opposite feeling,” replied the governor, good-humouredly. 
“ But observe, young man, I shall keep this affair secret, as in 
honour bound ; but let me advise you, as you have only your 
profession to look to, to follow it up steadily. It is high time 
that you and Mr. Easy were separated. He is independent of 
the service, and you are not. A young man possessing such 
ample means will never be fitted for the duties of a junior 
officer. He can do no good for himself, and is certain to do 
much harm to others : a continuance of his friendship would 
probably end in your ruin, Mr. Gascoigne. You must be 
aware, that if the greatest indulgence had not been shown to 
Mr. Easy by his captain and first-lieutenant, he never could 
have remained in the service so long as he has done.” 

As the governor made the last remark in rather a severe 
tone, our two midshipmen were silent for a minute. At last 
Jack observed, very quietly, — 

“ And yet, sir, I think, considering all, I have behaved 
pretty well.” 

“You have behaved very well, my good lad, on all occasions 
in which your courage and conduct, as an officer, have been 
called forth, I admit it ; and had you been sent to sea with 
a mind properly regulated, and without such an unlimited com- 
mand of money, I have no doubt but that you would have 
proved an ornament to the service. Even now I think you 
would, if you were to remain in the service, under proper 
guidance and necessary restrictions, for you have, at least, 
’earnt to obey, which is absolutely necessary before you are 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


351 


fit to command. But recollect, what would your conduct have 
brought upon you, if you had not been under the parental care 
of Captain Wilson ? But let us say no more about that : a 
midshipman with the prospect of eight thousand pounds a year 
is an anomaly which the service cannot admit, especially when 
that midshipman is resolved to take to himself a wife.” 

“I hope that you approve of that step, sir.” 

“ That entirely depends upon the merit of the party, which I 
know nothing of, except that she has a pretty face, and is of 
one of the best Sicilian families. I think the difference of 
religion a ground of objection.” 

“ We will argue that point, sir,” replied Jack. 

“ Perhaps it will be the cause of more argument than you 
think for, Mr. Easy ; but every man makes his own bed, and as 
he makes it, so must he lie down in it.” 

“What am I to do about Mesty, sir? I cannot bear the 
idea of parting with him.” 

“I am afraid that you must : I cannot well interfere 
there.” 

“ He is of little use to the service, sir ; he has been sent to 
sick quarters as my servant : if he may be permitted to go 
home with me, I will procure his discharge as soon as I arrive, 
and send him on board the guard-ship till I obtain it.” 

“ I think that, on the whole, he is as well out of the service 
as in it, and therefore I will, on consideration, take upon my- 
self the responsibility, provided you do as you say.” 

The conversation was here ended, as the governor had busi- 
ness to attend to, and Jack and Gascoigne went to their rooms 
to make their arrangements. 

“ The governor is right,” observed Gascoigne ; “it is better 
that w r e part, Jack. You have half unfitted me for the service 
already ; I have a disgust of the midshipmen’s berth ; the very 
smell of pitch and tar has become odious to me. This is all 
wrong ; I must forget you and all our pleasant cruises on shore, 
and once more swelter in my greasy jacket. When I think 
that, if our pretended accidents were discovered, I should be 


352 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


dismissed the service, and the misery which that would cause to 
my poor father, I tremble at my escape. The governor is 
right, Jack ; we must part, but I hope you never will forget 
me.” 

“ My hand upon it, Ned. Command my interest, if ever J 
liave any — my money — what I have, and the house, whether it 
belongs to me or my father — as far as you are concerned, at 
least, I adhere to my notions of perfect equality.” 

“ And adjure them, I trust, Jack, as a universal principle.” 

“ I admit, as the governor asserts, that my father is as mad 
as a March hare.” 

“ That is sufficient ; you don’t know how glad it makes me to 
hear you say that.” 

The two friends were inseparable during the short time that 
they remained together. They talked over their future pros- 
pects, their hopes and anticipations, and when the conversa- 
tion flagged, Gascoigne brought up the name of Agnes. 

Mesty’s delight at leaving the service, and going home with 
his patron, was indescribable. He laid out a portion of his 
gold in a suit of plain clothes, white linen shirts, and in every 
respect the wardrobe of a man of fashion ; in fact, he was now 
a complete gentleman’s gentleman ; was very particular in friz- 
zing his woolly hair — wore a white neck-cloth, gloves, and cane. 
Every one felt inclined to laugh when he made his appearance ; 
but there was something in Mesty’s look, which, at all events, 
prevented their doing so before his face. The day for sailing 
arrived. Jack took leave of the governor, thanking him foi 
his great kindness, and stating his intention of taking Malta in 
his way out to Palermo in a month or two. Gascoigne went 
on board with him, and did not go down the vessel’s side till it 
was more than a mile clear of the harbour. 

I 

\ 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


353 


CHAPTER XXX Y. 

MR. EASY’S WONDERFUL INVENTION FULLY EXPLAINED BY HIMSELF 

MUCH TO THE SATISFACTION OF OUR HERO, AND IT IS TO BE PRE- 
SUMED TO THAT ALSO OF THE READER. 

At last tlie packet anchored in Falmouth Roads. Jack, ac- 
companied by Mesty, was soon on shore with his luggage, threw 
himself into the mail, arrived in London, and waiting there two 
or three days, to obtain w r hat he considered necessary from a 
fashionable tailor, ordered a chaise to Forest Hill. He had not 
written to his father to announce his arrival, and it was late in 
the morning when the chaise drew up at his father’s door. 

Jack stepped out and rang the bell. The servants who 
opened the door did not know him : they were not the same as 
those he left. 

“ Where is Mr. Easy ?” demanded Jack. 

“ Who are you ?” replied one of the men, in a gruff tone. 

“ By de powers, you very soon find out who he is,” observed 
Mesty. 

“ Stay here, and I’ll see if he’s at home.” 

“ Stay here ! stay in the hall like a footman ? What do 
you mean, you rascal ?” cried J ack, attempting to push by the 
man. 

“ Oh, that won’t do here, master; this is Equality Hall; ono 
man’s as good as another.” 

“Hot always,” replied Jack, knocking him down. “ Take 
that for your insolence, pack up your traps, and walk out of the 
house to-morrow giorning.” 

Mesty, in the meantime, had seized the other by the throat. 

“ What I do with this fellow, Massa Easy ?” 

“Leave him now, Mesty; we’ll settle their account to-morrow 
morning. I presume I shall find my father in the library.” 

11 His father !” said one of the men to the other ; “ he’s not 
exactly a chip of the old block.” 


354 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


“We shall ha\e a change, I expect,” replied the other, as 
they walked away. 

“ Mesty,” cried Jack, in an authoritative tone, “ bring 
those two rascals back to take the luggage out of the chaise ; 
pay the postillion, and tell the housekeeper to show you my 
room and yours. Come to me for orders as soon as you have 
done this.” 

“Yes, sir,” replied Mesty. “Now, come here, you d n 

blackguard, and take tings out of chaise, or by de holy poker 
I choak your luff, both of you.” 

The filed teeth, the savage look, and determination of Mesty, 
had the due effect. The men sullenly returned, and unloaded 
the chaise. In the meantime, Jack walked into his father’s 
study ; his father was there — the study was lighted up with 
argand lamps, and Jack looked with astonishment. Mr. Easy 
was busy with a plaster cast of a human head, which he pored 
over, so that he did not perceive the entrance of his son. The 
cast of the skull was divided into many compartments, with 
writing on each ; but what most astonished our hero was the 
alteration in the apartment. The book-cases and books had 
all been removed, and in the centre, suspended from the ceiling, 
was an apparatus which would have puzzled any one, composed 
of rods in every direction, with screws at the end of them, and 
also tubes in equal number, one of which communicated with a 
large air-pump, which stood on a table. Jack took a short 
survey, and then walked up to his father and accosted him. 

“ What !” exclaimed Mr. Easy, “ is it possible ? — yes, it is 
my son John ! I’m glad to see you, John — very glad indeed,” 
continued the old gentleman, shaking him by both hands- — very 
glad that you have come home : I wanted you — wanted your 
assistance in my great and glorious project, which, I thank 
heaven, is now advancing rapidly. Very soon shall equality 
and the rights of man be proclaimed everywhere. The pres- 
sure from without is enormous, and the bulwarks of our ridicu- 
lous and tyrannical constitution must give way. King, lords, 
and aristocrats ; landholders, tithe-collectors, church and state, 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


355 


thank God, will soon be overthrown, and the golden age 
revived — the millennium, the true millennium — not what your 
poor mother talked about. I am*at the head of twenty-nine 
societies, and if my health lasts, you will see what I will 
accomplish now that I have your assistance, Jack ;” and Mr. 
Easy’s eyes sparkled and flashed in all the brilliancy of incipient 
insanity. 

Jack sighed, and to turn the conversation he observed, 
“ You have made a great change in this room, sir. What may 
all this be for ? Is it a machine to improve equality and the 
rights of man ?” 

“ My dear son,” replied Mr. Easy, sitting down, and crossing 
his legs complacently, with his two hands under his right thigh, 
according to his usual custom, when much pleased with himself, 
“ why, my dear son, that is not eractly the case, and yet you 
have shown some degree of perception even in your guess ; for 
if my invention succeeds, and I have no doubt of it, I shall 
have discovered the great art of rectifying the mistakes of 
nature, and giving an equality of organisation to the whole 
species, of introducing all the finer organs of humanity, and of 
destroying the baser. It is a splendid invention, Jack, very 
splendid. They may talk of Gall and Spurzheim, and all 
those ; but what have they done ? nothing but divided the 
brain into sections, classed the organs, and discovered where 
they reside ; but what good result has been gained from that ? 
the murderer by nature remained a murderer — the benevolent 
man, a benevolent man — he could not alter his organisation. I 
have found out how to change all that.” 

“Surely, sir, you would not interfere with the organ of 
benevolence ?” 

“But indeed I must, Jack. I, myself, am suffering from 
my organ of benevolence being too large ; I must reduce it, 
and then I shall be capable of greater things, shall not be so 
terrified by difficulties, and shall overlook trifles, and only carry 
on great schemes for . universal equality and the supreme rights 
of man. I have put myself into that, machine every morning 


356 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


tor two hours, for these last three months, and I feel now that 
I am daily losing a great portion.” 

“Will you do me the favour to explain an invention so 
extraordinary, sir,” said our hero. 

“ Most willingly, my boy. You observe that in the centre 
there is a frame to confine the human head, somewhat larger 
than the head itself, and that the head rests upon the iron 
collar beneath. When the head is thus firmly fixed, suppose 
I want to reduce the size of any particular organ, I take the 
boss corresponding to where that organ is situated in the 
cranium, and fix it on it. For you will observe that all the 
bosses inside of the top of the frame correspond to the organs 
as described in this plaster-cast on the table. I then screw 
down pretty tight, and increase the pressure daily, until the 
organ disappears altogether, or is reduced to the size re- 
quired.” 

“ I comprehend that part perfectly, sir,” replied Jack ; “ but 
now explain to me by what method you contrive to raise an 
' organ which does not previously exist.” 

“ That,” replied Mr. Easy, “is the greatest perfection of the 
whole invention, for without I could do that, I could have 
done little. I feel convinced that this invention of mine will 
immortalize me. Observe all these little bell-glasses which 
communicate with the air-pump. I shave my patient’s head, 
grease it a little, and fix on the bell-glass, which is exactly 
shaped to fit the organ in length and breadth. I work tho 
air-pump, and raise the organ by an exhausted receiver. It 
cannot fail. There is my butler, now ; a man who escaped 
hanging last spring assizes, on an undoubted charge of murder. 
I selected him on purpose ; I have flattened down murder to 
nothing, and I have raised benevolence till it’s like a wen.” 

“I am afraid my poor father’s head is an exhausted 
receiver,” thought Jack, who then replied, “Well, sir, if it 
succeeds it will be a good invention.” 

“If it succeeds ! — why, it has succeeded — it cannot fail. 
It has cost me near two thousand pounds. By-the-bye, Jack, 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


351 


you have drawn very liberally lately, and I had some trouble, 
with my own expenses, to meet your bills ; not that I complain 
— but what with societies, and my machine, and tenants refus- 
ing to pay their rents, on the principle that the farms are 
no more mine than theirs, which I admit to be true, I have had 
some difficulty in meeting all demands.” 

11 The governor was right,” thought Jack, who now inquired 
after Dr. Middleton. 

“ Ah, poor silly man ! he’s alive yet — I believe doing well. 
He is one who will interfere with the business of others, com- 
plains of my servants — very silly man indeed — but I let him 
have his own way. So I did your poor mother. Silly woman, 
Mrs. Easy — but never mind that.” 

“ If you please, sir, I have also a complaint to make of the 
servants for their insolence to me ; but we will adjourn, if you 
please, as I wish to have some refreshment.” 

“ Certainly Jack, if you are hungry ; I will go with you. 
Complain of my servants, say you ? — there must be some mis- 
take — they are all shaved, and wear wigs, and I put them in 
the machine every other morning ; but I mean to make an 
alteration in one respect. You observe, Jack, it requires more 
dignity : we must raise the whole machinery some feet, ascend 
it with state as a throne, for it is the throne of reason, the 
victory of mind over nature.” 

“ As you please, sir ; but I am really hungry just now.” 

Jack and his father went into the drawing-room and rang 
the bell ; not being answered, Jack rose and rang again. 

“ My dear sir,” observed Mr. Easy, “ you must not be in a 
hurry ; every man naturally provides for his own wants first, 
and afterwards for those of others. Now my servants ” 

“ Are a set of insolent scoundrels, sir, and insolence I never 
permit. I knocked one down as I entered your house, and, 
with your permission, I will discharge two, at least, to-mor- 
row.” 

“ My dear son,” exclaimed Mr. Easy, “ you knocked my ser- 
vant down ! — are you not aware, by the laws of equality ” 


358 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


“ I am aware of this, my dear father,” replied Jack ; “ that 
by all the laws of society we have a right to expect civility 
and obedience from those we pay and feed.” 

“ Pay and feed ! Why my dear son, — my dear Jack — you 
must recollect ” 

“ I recollect, sir, very well ; but if your servants do not 
come to their recollection in a very short time, either I or they 
must quit the house.” 

“ But, my dear boy, have you forgotten the principles I 
instilled into you? Did you not go to sea to obtain that 
equality foiled by tyranny and despotism here on shore ? Do 
you not acknowledge and support my philosophy ?” 

“We’ll argue that point to-morrow, sir — at present I want 
to obtain my supper ;” and Jack rang the bell furiously. 

The butler made his appearance at this last summons, and he 
was followed by Mesty, who looked like a demon with anger. 

“ Mercy on me, whom have we here ?” 

“My servant, father,” exclaimed Jack, starting up; “one 
that I can trust to, and who will obey me. Mesty, I wish 
some supper and wine to be brought immediately — see that 
that scoundrel gets it ready in a moment. If he does not, 
throw him out of the door, and lock him out. You understand 
me ?” * 

“Yes, massa,” grinned Mesty ; “ now you hab supper very 
quick, or Mesty know the reason why. Follow me, sar,” cried 
Mesty, in an imperative tone to the butler ; “ quick sar, or by 
de holy poker, I show you what Mesty can do ;” and Mesty 
grinned in his wrath. 

“ Bring supper and wine immediately,” said Mr. Easy, giving 
an order such as the butler had never heard since he had been 
in the house. 

The butler quitted the room, followed by the Ashantee. 

“ My dear boy — my Jack — I can make every allowance for 
hunger, it is often the cause of theft and crime in the present 
unnatural state of society — but really you are too violent 
The principles ” 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


359 


“ Your principles are all confounded nonsense, father,” cried 
Jack, in a rage. 

“ What Jack \ — my son — what do I hear ? This from you 
— nonsense! Why, Jack, what has Captain Wilson been 
doing with you ?” 

“ Bringing me to my senses, sir.” 

“ Oh dear, oh dear ! my dear Jack, you will certainly make 
me lose mine.” 

“ Gone already,” thought Jack. 

“That you, my child, so carefully brought up in the great 
and glorious school of philosophy, should behave this way — 
should be so violent — forget your sublime philosophy, and all 
— -just like Esau, selling your birth-right for a mess of pottage. 
Oh Jack, you’ll kill me ! and yet I love you, Jack— whom else 
have I to love in this world ? Never mind, we’ll argue the 
point, my boy-^I’ll convince you — in a week all will be right 
again.” 

“ It shall, sir, if I can manage it,” replied Jack. 

“ That’s right, I love to hear you say so — that’s consoling, 
very consoling — but I think now, I was wrong to let you go to 
sea, Jack.” 

“ Indeed, you were not, father.” 

“ Well, I’m glad to hear you say so ; I thought they had 
ruined you, destroyed all your philosophy — but it will be all 
right again — you shall come to our societies, J ack — I am presi- 
dent — you shall hear me speak, J ack — you shall hear me thun- 
der like Demosthenes — but here comes the tray.” 

The butler, followed by Mesty, who attended him as if he 
was his prisoner, now made his appearance with the tray, laid 
it down in a sulky manner and retired. Jack desired Mesty to 
remain. 

“ Well, Mesty, how are they getting on in the servants’ hall ?” 

“ Regular mutiny, sar— ab swear dat they no stand our non- 
tense, and dat we both leave the house to-morrow.” 

“ Do you hear, sir, your servants declare that I shall leave 
your house to-morrow.” 


3 GO 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EAST. 


“ You leave my house, Jack, after four years’ absence ! — no, 
no. I’ll reason with them — I’ll make them a speech. You 
don’t know how I can speak, Jack.” 

“ Look you, father, I cannot stand this ; either give me a 
carte-blanche to arrange this household as I please, or I shall 
quit it myself to-morrow morning.” 

“ Quit my house, Jack ! no, no — shake hands and make 
friends with them ; be civil, and they will serve you — but you 
know, upon the principles ” 

“ Principles of the devil !” cried Jack in a rage. 

“ Of the devil, Jack ; dear me 1 I wish you had never gone 
to sea.” 

“ In one word, sir, do you consent, or am I to leave the 
house ?” 

“ Leave the house ! 0 no ; not leave the house, Jack. I 
have no son but you. Then do as you please — but you must 
not send away my murderer, for I must have him cured, and 
shown as a proof of my wonderful invention.” 

“ Mesty, get my pistols ready for to-morrow morning, and 
your own too — do ye hear ?” 

“ All ready, massa,” replied Mesty ; “I tink dat right.” 

“ Right ! — pistols, Jack ! What do you mean ?” 

“ It is possible, father, that you may not have yet quite cured 
your murderer, and therefore it is as well to be prepared. 1 
will now wish you good night ; but before I go, you will be 
pleased to summon one of the servants that he may inform the 
others that the household is under my control for the future.” 

The bell was again rung, and was this time answered with 
more expedition. Jack told the servant, in presence of his 
father, that with the consent of the latter, he should hereafter 
take the whole control of the establishment, and that Mesty 
would be the major-domo from whom they would receive their 
orders. The man stared, and cast an appealing look to Mr. 
Easy, who hesitated, and at last said — 

“ Yes, William ; you’ll apologise to all, and say that I have 
made the arrangement.” 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


361 


“You apologise to none, sir,” cried Jack ; “ but tell them 
that I will arrange the whole business to-morrow morning. Tell 
the woman to come here and show me my bed-room. Mesty, 
get your supper and then come up to me ; if they dare to 
refuse you, recollect who does, and point them out to-morrow 
morning. That will do, sir ; away with you, and bring flat 
candlesticks.” 


CHAPTER XXXYI. 

W WHICH JACK TAKES UP THE OTHER SIDE OF THE ARGUMENT, AND 
PROVES THAT HE CAN ARGUE AS WELL ON ONE SIDE AS THE 
OTHER. 

This scene may give some idea of the state of Mr. Easy’s 
household upon our hero’s arrival. The poor lunatic, for such 
we must call him, was at the mercy of his servants, who robbed, 
laughed at, and neglected him. The waste and expense were 
enormous. Our hero, who found how matters stood, went to 
bed, and lay the best part of the night revolving what to do. 
He determined to send for Dr. Middleton, and consult him. 

The next morning, Jack rose early ; Mesty was in the room, 
ivith warm water, as soon as he rang. 

“ By de power, Massa Easy, your fader very silly old man.” 
“I’m afraid so,” replied Jack. 

“ He not right here,” observed Mesty, putting his finger to 
his head. 

Jack sighed, and desired Mesty to send one of the grooms up 
to the door. When the man knocked, he desired him to mount 
a horse and ride over to Dr. Middleton, and request his imme- 
diate attendance. 

The man, who was really a good servant, replied, “ Yes, 
gir,” very respectfully, and hastened away. 

Jack went down to breakfast, and found it all ready, but his 

16 


362 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


father was not in the room ; he went to his study, and found 
him occupied with a carpenter who was making a sort of a 
frame as the model of a platform or dais, to be raised under 
the wonderful invention. Mr. Easy was so busy that he could 
not come to breakfast, so Jack took his alone. An hour after 
this Dr: Middleton’s carriage drove up to the door. The 
doctor heartily greeted our hero. 

“ My dear sir — for so I suppose I must now call you — I am 
heartily glad that you have returned. I can assure you that it 
is not a moment too soon.” 

“ I have found out that already, doctor,” replied Jack ; “ sit 
down. Have you breakfasted ?” 

“No, I have not ; for I was so anxious to sec you, that I 
ordered my carriage at once.” 

“Then sit down, doctor, and we will talk over matters 
quietly.” 

“ You of course perceive the state of your father. He has 
been some time quite unfit to manage his own affairs.” 

“ So I am afraid .” 

“ What do you intend to do then — put them in the hands of 
trustees ?” 

“ I will be trustee for myself, Doctor Middleton. I could 
not do the other without submitting my poor father to a pro- 
cess, and confinement which I cannot think of.” 

“ I can assure you that there are not many in Bedlam worse 
than he is ; but I perfectly agree with you ; that is, if he will 
consent to your taking charge of the property.” 

“A power of attorney will be all that is requisite,” 
replied Jack ; “ that is, as soon as I have rid the house of the set 
jf miscreants who are in it, and who are now in open mutiny.” 

“I think,” replied the doctor, “that you will have some 
trouble. You know the character of the butler.” 

“Yes, I have it from my father’s own mouth. I really 
should take it as a great favour, Doctor Middleton, if you could 
stay here a day or two. I know that you have retired from 
practice.” 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EAST. 


363 


u I would have made the same offer, my young friend. I will 
come here with two of my servants ; for you must discharge 
these.” 

“ I have one of my own who is worth his weight in gold — 
that will be sufficient. I will dismiss every man you think I 
ought, and as for the women, we can give them warning, and 
replace them at leisure.” 

“ That is exactly what I should propose,” replied the doctor. 
“ I will now go, if you please, procure the assistance of a couple 
of constables, and also of your father’s former legal adviser, 
who shall prepare a power of attorney.” 

“ Yes,” replied Jack, “ and we must then find out the tenants 
who refuse to pay upon the principles of equality, and he shall 
serve them with notice immediately.” 

“ I am rejoiced, my dear young friend, to perceive that your 
father’s absurd notions have not taken root.” 

“ They lasted some time, nevertheless, doctor,” replied Jack, 
laughing. 

“ Well, then, I will only quit you for an hour or two, and 
then, as you wish it, will take up my quarters here as long as 
you find me useful.” 

In the forenoon, Dr. Middleton again made his appearance, 
accompanied by Mr. Hanson, the solicitor, bringing with him 
his portmanteau and his servants. Mr. Easy had come intd 
the parlour, and was at breakfast when they entered. He 
received them very coolly ; but a little judicious praise of the 
wonderful invention had its due effect ; and after Jack had 
reminded him of his promise that in future he was to control 
the household, he was easily persuaded to sign the order for his 
so doing— that is, the power of attorney. 

Mr. Easy also gave up to Jack the key of his secretary, and 
Mr. Hanson possessed himself of the books, papers, and receipts 
necessary to ascertain the state of his affairs, and the rents 
which had not yet been paid up. In the meantime the con- 
stables arrived. The servants were all summoned; Mr. Hanson 


364 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EAST. 


showed them the power of attorney, empowering J ack to act 
for his father, and in less than half an hour afterwards, all the 
men-servants, but two grooms, were dismissed : the presence of 
the constables and Mesty prevented any resistance, but not 
without various threats on the part of the butler, whose name 
was O’Rourke. Thus, in twenty-four hours, Jack had made a 
reformation in the household. 

Mr. Easy took no notice of anything; he returned to his study 
and his wonderful invention. Mesty had received the keys of 
the cellar, and had now complete control over those who re- 
mained. Dr. Middleton, Mr. Hanson, Mr. Easy and Jack, sat 
down to dinner, and everything wore the appearance of order 
and comfort. Mr. Easy ate very heartily, but said nothing till 
after dinner, when, as was his usual custom, he commenced 
arguing upon the truth and soundness of his philosophy. 

“ By-the-bye, my dear son, if I recollect right, you told me 
last night that you were no longer of my opinion. Now, if you 
please, we will argue this point.” 

“ I’ll argue the point with all my heart, sir,” replied Jack; 
“ will you begin ?” 

“ Let’s fill our glasses,” cried Mr. Easy, triumphantly; “ let’s 
fill our glasses, and then I will bring Jack back to the proper 
way of thinking. Now, then, my son, I trust you will not deny 
that we were all born equal.” 

“ I do deny it, sir,” replied Jack; “ I deny it in toto — I deny 
it from the evidence of our own senses, and from the authority 
of Scripture. To suppose all men were born equal, is to suppose 
that they are equally endowed with the same strength, and with 
the same capacity of mind, which we know is not the case. I 
deny it from Scripture, from which I could quote many passages; 
but I will restrict myself to one — the parable of the Talents : 
‘ To one he gave five talents, to another but one,’ holding them 
responsible for the trust reposed in them. We are all intended 
to fill various situations in society, and are provided by Heaven 
accordingly.” 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


365 


“ That may be,” replied Mr. Easy; “but that does not prove 
that the earth was not intended to be equally distributed among 
all alike.” 

“ I beg your pardon; the proof that that was not the inten- 
tion of Providence is, that that equality, allowing it to be put 
in practice, could never be maintained.” 

“ Not maintained ! — no, because the strong oppress the weak, 
tyrants rise up and conquer — men combine to do wrong.” 

“ Not so, my dear father; I say it could not be maintained 
without the organisation of each individual had been equalised, 
and several other points established. For instance, allowing 
that every man had, ab origine, a certain portion of ground. 
He who was the strongest or the cleverest, would soon cause 
his to yield more than others would, and thus the equality be 
destroyed. Again, if one couple had ten children, and another 
had none, then again would equality be broken in upon, as the 
land that supports two in the one instance, would have to feed 
twelve in the other. You perceive, therefore, that without ra- 
pine or injustice, your equality could not be preserved.” 

“But, Jack, allowing that there might be some diversity 
from such causes, that would be a very different thing from the 
present monstrous state of society, in which we have kings, and 
lords, and people, rolling in wealth, while others are in a state 
of pauperism, and obliged to steal for their daily bread.” 

“ My dear father, I consider that it is to this inequality that 
society owes its firmest cementation, that we are enabled to live 
in peace and happiness, protected by just laws, each doing his 
duty in that state of life to which he is called, rising above or 
sinking in the scale of society according as he has been entrusted 
with the five talents or the one. Equality can and does exist 
nowhere. We are told that it does not exist in heaven itself — 
how can it exist upon earth •?” 

“ But that is only asserted, Jack, and it is not proof that it 
ought not to exist.” 

“Let; us argue the point, father, coolly. Let us examine a 
little what would be the effect if all was equality. Were all 


366 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


equal in beauty, there would be no beauty, for beauty is only by 
comparison — were all equal in strength, conflicts would be in- 
terminable — were all equal in rank, and power, and possessions, 
the greatest charms of existence would be destroyed — gene- 
rosity, gratitude, and half the finer virtues would be unknown. 
The first principle of our religion, charity, could not be practised 
— pity would never be called forth — benevolence, your great 
organ, would be useless, and self-denial a blank letter. Were all 
equal in ability, there would be no instruction, no talent — no 
genius — nothing to admire, nothing to copy, to respect — nothing 
w to rouse emulation, or stimulate to praiseworthy ambition. Why, 
my dear father, what an idle, unprofitable, weary world would 
this be, if it were based on equality !” 

“ But, allowing all that, Jack,” replied Mr. Easy, “ and I will 
say you argue well in a bad cause ; why should the inequality 
be carried so far ? king and lords, for instance.” 

“The most lasting and imperishable form of building is that 
of the pyramid, which defies ages, and to that may the most 
perfect form of society be compared. It is based upon the many, 
and rising by degrees, it becomes less as wealth, talent, and 
rank increase in the individual, until it ends at the apex, or 
monarch, above all. Yet each several stone from the apex to 
the base is necessary for the preservation of the structure, and 
fulfils its duty in its allotted place. Could you prove that those 
at the summit possess the greatest share of happiness in this 
world, then, indeed, you have a position to argue on ; but it is 
well known, that such is not the case ; and provided he is of a 
contented mind, the peasant is more happy than the king, sur- 
rounded as the latter is by cares and anxiety.” 

“Very well argued, indeed, my dear sir,” observed Dr. Mid- 
dleton. 

“ But, my dear boy, there are other states of society than 
monarchy ; we have republics and despotisms.” 

“We have, but how long do they last, compared to the first? 
There is a cycle in the changes which never varies. A monarchy 
may be overthrown by a revolution, and republicanism succeed.. 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


367 


but that is shortly followed by despotism, till, after a time, 
monarchy succeeds again by unanimous consent, as the most 
legitimate and equitable form of government ; but in none of 
these do you find a single advance to equality. In a republic, 
those who govern are more powerful than the rulers in a re- 
stricted monarchy — a president is greater than a king, and next 
to a despot, whose will is law. Even in small societies you find 
that some will naturally take the lead and assume domination. 
We commence the system at school, when we are first thrown 
into society, and there we are taught systems of petty tyranny. 
There are some few points in which we can obtain equality in 
this world, and that equality can only be obtained under a well- 
regulated form of society, and consists in an equal administration 
of justice and of laws to which we have agreed to submit for the 
benefit of the whole — the equal right to live and not be permit- 
ted to starve, which has been obtained in this country. And 
when we are all called to account, we shall have equal justice. 
Now, my dear father, you have my opinion.” 

“Yes, my dear, this is all very well in the abstract ; but how 
does it work ?” 

“ It works well. The luxury, the pampered state, the idle- 
ness — if you please the wickedness of the rich, all contribute to 
the support, the comfort, and employment of the poor. You may 
behold extravagance, — it is a vice ; but that very extravagance 
circulates money, and the vice of one contributes to the happi- 
ness of many. The only vice which is not redeemed by produc- 
ing commensurate good, is avarice. If all were equal there 
would be no arts, no manufactures, no industry, no employment. 
As it is, the inequality of the distribution of wealth may be 
compared to the heart, pouring forth the blood like a steam- 
engine through the human frame, the same blood returning 
from the extremities by the veins, to be again propelled, and 
keep up a healthy and vigorous circulation.” 

“ Bravo, Jack 1” said Dr. Middleton. “ Have you any thing 
to reply, sir ?” continued he, addressing Mr. Easy. 

“ To reply, sir ?” replied Mr. Easy with scorn, " why he has 


368 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


not given me half an argument yet — why that black servant 
even laughs at him — look at him there showing his teeth. Can 
he forget the horrors of slavery ? can he forget the base unfeel- 
ing lash ? — no, sir, he has suffered, and he can estimate the 
divine right of equality. Ask him now, ask him if you dare, 
Jack, whether he will admit the truth of your argument.” 

“Well, I'll ask him,” replied Jack, “and I tell you can- 
didly that he was once one of your disciples. Mesty, what’s 
your opinion of equality ?” 

“Equality, Massa Easy?” replied Mesty, pulling up his 
cravat ; “I say d — m equality, now I major domo.” 

“ The rascal deserves to be a slave all his life.” 

“ True, I ab been slave — but I a prince in my own country 
— Massa Easy tell how many skulls I have.” 

“ Skulls — skulls — do you know anything of the sublime 
science ? are you a phrenologist ?” 

“ I know man’s skull very well in Ashantee country, any 
how.” 

“ Then if you know that, you must be one. I had no idea 
that the science had extended so far — may be it was brought 
from thence. I will have some talk with you to-morrow. This 
is very curious, Doctor Middleton, is it not ?” 

“Very, indeed, Mr. Easy.” 

“ I shall feel his head to-morrow after breakfast, and if there 
is anything wrong I shall correct it with my machine. By-the- 
bye, I have quite forgot, gentlemen ; you will excuse me, but I 
wish to see what the carpenter has done for me, and after that 
I shall attend the meeting of the society. Jack, my boy, won’t 
you come and hear my speech.” 

“ Thank you, sir, but I cannot well leave your friends.” 

Mr. Easy quitted the room. 

“ Are you aware, my dear sir, that your father has opened 
his preserves to all the poachers ?” said Mr. Hanson. 

“The devil he has !” 

“Yes, he has allowed several gangs of gipsies to locate 
themselves in his woods, much to the annoyance of the neigh- 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


369 


bourhood, who suffer from their depredations,” continued Dr 
Middleton. 

“ I find by the receipts and books, that there is nearly two 
years’ rental of the estate due ; some tenants have paid up in 
full, others not for four years. I reckon fourteen thousand 
pounds still in arrear.” 

“You will oblige me by taking immediate steps, Mr. Hanson, 
for the recovery of the sums due.” 

“Most certainly, Mr. John. I trust your father will not 
commit himself to-night as he has done lately.” 

When they rose to retire, Dr. Middleton took our hero by 
the hand. “You do not know, my dear fellow, what pleasure 
it gives me to find that, in spite of the doting of your mother 
and the madness of your father, you have turned out so well. 
It is very fortunate that you have come home ; I trust you will 
now give up the profession.” 

“ I have given it up, sir ; which, by-the-bye, reminds me that 
I have not applied for either my discharge or that of my ser- 
vant ; but I cannot spare time yet, so I shall not report myself.” 


CHAPTER XXXVII. 

IN WHICH OUR HERO FINDS HIMSELF AN ORPHAN, AND RESOLVES 
TO GO TO SEA AGAIN,' WITHOUT THE SMALLEST IDEA OF EQUALITY. 

The next morning, when they met at breakfast, Mr. Easy did 
not make his appearance, and Jack inquired of Mesty -where he 
was ? 

“ They say down below that the old gentleman not come 
dome last night.” 

“ Did not come home 1” said Dr. Middleton, “ this must be 
looked to.” 

“ He great rascal dat butler man,” said Mesty to Jack ;■ 
:t but de old gentleman not sleep in his bed, dat for sure n 

16 * 


3*10 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


“ Make inquiries when he went out,” said Jack. 

“ I hope no accident has happened,” observed Mr. Hanson j 
“ but his company has lately been very strange.” 

“ Nobody see him go out, sar, last night,” reported Mesty. 

“‘Very likely he is in his study,” observed Dr. Middleton ; 
“ he may hare remained all night, fast asleep, by his wonderful 
invention .” 

“ I’ll go and see,” replied Jack. 

Dr. Middleton accompanied him, and Mesty followed. They 
opened the door, and beheld a spectacle which made them recoil 
with horror. There was Mr. Easy, with his head in the ma- 
chine, the platform below fallen from under him, hanging, with 
his toes just touching the ground. Dr. Middleton hastened to 
him, and, assisted by Mesty and our hero, took him out of the 
steel collar which was round his neck ; but life had been extinct 
for many hours, and, on examination, it was found that the 
poor old gentleman’s neck was dislocated. 

It was surmised that the accident must have taken place the 
evening before, and it was easy to account for it. Mr. Easy, 
who had had the machine raised four feet higher, for the plat- 
form and steps to be placed underneath, must have mounted on 
the frame modelled by the carpenter for his work, and have 
fixed his head in, for the knob was pressed on his bump of bene- 
volence. The frame-work, hastily put together with a few short 
nails, had given way with his weight, and the sudden fall had 
dislocated his neck. 

Mr. Hanson led away our hero, who was much shocked at 
this unfortunate and tragical end of his poor father, while Dr. 
Middleton ordered the body to be taken up into a bed-room, 
and immediately despatched a messenger to the coroner of the 
county. Poor Mr. Easy had told his son but the day before, 
that he felt convinced that this wonderful invention would im- 
mortalise him, and so it had, although not exactly in the sense 
that he anticipated. 

We must pass over the few days of sorrow, and closed shut- 
ters, which always are given to these scenes. The coroner's 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


373 

inquest and the funeral over, daylight was again admitted, our 
hero’s spirits revived, and he found himself in possession of a 
splendid property, and his own master. 

He was not of age, it is true, for he wanted nine months; but 
on opening the will of his father, he found that Dr. Middleton 
was his sole guardian. Mr. Hanson, on examining and collecting 
the papers, which were in the greatest confusion, discovered 
bank-notes in different corners, and huddled up with bills and 
receipts, to the amount of two thousand pounds, and farther, a 
cheque signed by Captain Wilson on his banker, for the thou- 
sand pounds advanced by Mr. Easy, dated more than fifteen 
months back. « 

Dr. Middleton wrote to the Admiralty, informing them that 
family affairs necessitated Mr. John Easy, who had been left at 
sick quarters, to leave his majesty’s service, requesting his dis- 
charge from it forthwith. The Admiralty was graciously 
pleased to grant the request, and lose the services of a midship- 
man. -The Admiralty were also pleased to grant the discharge 
of Mesty, on the sum required for a substitute being paid in. 

The gipsies were routed out of their abodes, and sent once 
more to wander. The game-keepers were restored, the pre- 
serves cleared of all poachers, and the gentry of the country 
were not a little pleased at Jack’s succession, for they had 
wished that Mr. Easy’s neck had been broken long ago. The 
societies were dissolved, since, now that Mr. Easy no longer 
paid for the beer, there was nothing to meet for. Cards and 
compliments were sent from all parts of the county, and every 
one was anxious that our hero should come of age, as then he 
would be able to marry, to give dinners, subscribe to the fox- 
hounds, and live as a gentleman ought to do. 

But during all these speculations, Jack had made Dr. Middle- 
ton acquainted with the history of his amour with Agnes de 
Rebiera, and all particulars connected therewith, also with his 
determination to go out to bring her home as his wife. Dr. 
Middleton saw no objection to the match, and he perceived 
that our hero was sincere. And Jack had made inquiries when 


372 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


the packet would sail for Malta, when Mesty, who stood behind 
his chair, observed — 

“ Packet bad vessel, Massa Easy. Why not go out in man- 
of-war.” 

“Very true,” replied Jack ; “but you know, Mesty, that is 
not so easy.” 

“And den how come home, sar. Suppose you and Missy 
Agnes taken prisoner — put in prison ?” 

“Very true,” replied Jack ; “and as for a passage home in 
a man-of-war, that will be more difficult still.” 

“Den I tink, sar, suppose you buy one fine vessel — plenty 
of guns — take out letter of marque — plenty of men, and 
bring Miss Agnes home like a lady. You captain of your 
own ship.” 

“That deserves consideration, Mesty,” replied Jack, who 
thought of it during that night ; and the next day resolved to 
follow Mesty's advice. The Portsmouth paper lay on the 
breakfast-table. Jack took it up, and his eye was caught by 
an advertisement for the sale of the Joan d’Arc, prize to 
IT. M. ship Thetis, brigantine of 278 tons, copper-bottomed, 
armed en flute , with all her stores, spars, sails, running and 
standing rigging, then lying in the harbour of Portsmouth, 
to take place on the following Wednesday. 

Jack rang the bell, and ordered post-horses. 

“Where are you going, my dear boy ?” inquired Dr. Middleton. 

“ To Portsmouth, Doctor.” 

“ And pray what for, if not an impertinent question ?” 

Jack then gave Dr. Middleton an insight into his plan, and 
requested that he would allow him to do so, as there was 
plenty of ready-money. 

“ But the expense will be enormous.” 

“ It will be heavy, sir, I grant ; but I have calculated it 
pretty nearly, and I shall not spend at the rate of more than 
my income. Besides, as letter of marque, I shall have the 
right of capture ; in fact, I mean to take out a privateer's 
regular licence.” 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


373 


“ But not to remain there and cruise ?” 

“ No, upon my honour ; I am too anxious to get home 
again. You must not refuse me, my dear guardian.” 

“ As a lady is in the case, I will not, my dear boy ; but be 
careful what you are about.” 

“Never fear, sir, I will be back in four months, at the 
farthest ; but I must now set off and ascertain if the vessel 
answers the description given in the advertisement .”- 

Jack threw himself into the chariot. Mesty mounted into 
the rumble, and in two hours they were at Portsmouth ; went 
to the agent, viewed the vessel, which proved to be a very fine 
fast-sailing craft, well found, with six brass carronades on 
each side. The cabins were handsome, fitted up with bird’s-eye 
maple, and gilt mouldings. 

This will do, thought Jack ; a couple of long brass nines, 
forty men and six boys, and she will be just the thing we 
require. So Mesty and Jack went on shore again, and re- 
turned to Forest Hill to dinner, when he desired Mr. Hanson 
to set off for Portsmouth, and bid at the sale for the vessel, as 
he wished to purchase her. This was Monday, and on Wed- 
day, Mr. Hanson purchased her, -as she stood, for £1750, 
which was considered about half her value. 

Hr. Middleton had, in the meantime, been thinking very 
seriously of Jack’s project. He could see no objection to it, 
provided that he was steady and prudent, but in both these 
qualities Jack had not exactly been tried. He therefore de- 
termined to look out for some steady naval lieutenant, and 
make it a sine qua non that our hero should be accompanied 
by him, and that he should go out as sailing-master. Now 
that the vessel was purchased, he informed J ack of his wish ; 
mdeed, as Hr. Middleton observed, his duty as guardian 
demanded this precaution, and our hero, who felt very grateful 
to Hr. Middleton, immediately acquiesced. 

“ And, by-the-bye, Hoctor, see that he is a good navigator : 
for although 1 can fudge a day’s work pretty well, latterly 1 
have been out of practice.” 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


374 

Every one was now busy. Jack and Mesty at Portsmouth, 
fitting out the vessel, and offering three guineas a head to the 
crimps for every good able seaman — Mr. Hanson obtaining the 
English register, and the letters of licence, and Dr. Middleton 
in search of a good naval dry nurse. Jack found time to write 
to Don Philip and Agnes, apprising them of the death of his 
father, and his intentions. 

In about six weeks all was ready, and the brigantine, which 
had taken out her British register and licence under the name 
of the Rebiera, went out of harbour, and anchored at Spithead. 
Dr. Middleton had procured, as he thought, a very fit person to 
sail with Jack, and our hero and Mesty embarked, wishing the 
doctor and solicitor good-bye, and leaving them nothing to do 
but to pay the bills. 

The person selected by Dr. Middleton, by the advice of an old 
friend of his, a purser in the navy, who lived at Southsea, was 
a Lieutenant Oxbelly, who, with the ship’s company, which had 
been collected, received our hero as their captain and owner 
upon his arrival on board. There certainly was no small contrast 
between our hero’s active slight figure and handsome person, set 
off with a blue coat, something like the present yacht-club uni- 
form, and that of his second in command, who waddled to the 
side to receive him. He was a very short man, with an un- 
common protuberance of stomach, with shoulders -and arms too 
short for his body, and hands much too large, more like the 
paws of a polar bear than any thing else. He wore trowsers, 
shoes, and buckles. On his head was a foraging cap, which, 
when he took it off, showed that he was quite bald. His age 
night be about fifty-five or sixty ; his complexion florid, no 
Ykiskers, and little beard, nose straight, lips thin, teeth black 
with chewing, and always a little brown dribble from the left 
corner of his mouth (there was a leak there, he said). Alto- 
gether his countenance was prepossessing, for it was honest and 
manly, but his waist was preposterous. 

“ Steady enough,” thought Jack, as he returned Mr. Oxbelly’s 
^srihce. 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


3?5 


“ How do you do, sir ?” said Jack, “ I trust we shall be good 
shipmates,” for Jack had not seen him before. 

“ Mr. Easy,” replied the lieutenant, “ I never quarrel with 
any one, except (I won’t tell a story) with my wife.” 

“ I am sorry that you have ever domestic dissensions, Mr. 
Oxbelly.” 

“ And I only quarrel with her at night, sir. She will take up 
more than her share of the bed, and won’t allow me to sleep 
single ; but never mind that, sir ; now will you please to mus- 
ter the men ?” 

“ If you please, Mr. Oxbelly.” 

The men were mustered, and Jack made them a long 
speech upon subordination, discipline, activity, duty, and so 
forth. 

“ A very good speech, Mr. Easy,” said Mr. Oxbelly as the 
men went forward ; “ I wish my wife had heard it. But, sir, 
if you please, we’ll now get under way as fast as we can, for there 
is a Channel cruiser working up at St. Helen’s, and we may 
give him the go-by by running through the Needles.” 

“ But what need we care for the Channel cruiser ?” 

“You forget, sir, that as soon as she drops her anchor she 
will come on board and take a fancy to at least ten of our men.” 

“ But they are protected.” 

“Yes, sir, but that’s no protection, now-a-days. I have 
sailed in a privateer at least three years, and I know that they 
have no respect for letters of marque or for privateers.” 

“ I believe you are right, Mr. Oxbelly ; so, if you please, we 
will up with the anchor at once.” 

The crew of the Kebiera had been well chosen ; they were 
prime men-of-war’s men, most of whom had deserted from the 
various ships on the station, and, of course, were most anxious 
to be off. In a few minutes the Kebiera was under way with 
all sail set below and aloft. She was in excellent trim, and flew 
through the water ; the wind was fair, and by night they had 
passed Portland Lights, and the next morning were steering a 
course for the Bay of Biscay without having encountered what 


376 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


they feared more than an enemy — a British cruiser to overhaul 
them. 

“ I think we shall do now, sir,” observed Mr. Oxbelly to our 
hero ; “ we have made a famous run. It’s twelve o’clock, and 
if you please I’ll work the latitude, and let you know what it 
is. We must shape our course so as not to run in with the 
Brest squadron. A little more westing, sir. I’ll be up in one 
minute. My wife — but I’ll tell you about that when I come up.” 

“Latitude 41° 12', sir. I was about to say that my wife, 
when she was on board of the privateer, that I commanded — ” 

“ Board of the privateer, Mr. Oxbelly ?” 

“Yes, sir, would go ; told her it was impossible, but she 
wouldn’t listen to reason — came on board, flopped herself into 
the standing bed-place, and said that there she was for the 
cruise, — little Billy with her ” 

“ What ! your child, too ?” 

“Yes, two years old — fine boy — always laughed when the 
guns were fired, while his mother stood on the ladder and held 
him on the top of the booby-hatch.” 

“ I wonder that Mrs. Oxbelly let you come here now ?” 

“ So you would, sir, but I’ll explain that — she thinks I’m in 
London about my half-pay. She knows all by this time, and 
frets, I don’t doubt ; but that will make her thin, and then 
there will be more room in the bed. Mrs. Oxbelly is a very 
stout woman.” 

“ Why you are not a little man !” 

“No, not little — tending to be lusty, as the saying is — that 
is, in good condition. It’s very strange that Mrs. Oxbelly has 
an idea that she is not large. I cannot persuade her to it. 
That’s the reason we always spar in bed. She says it is I, and 
T know that it is she who takes the largest share of it.” 

“ Perhaps you may both be right.” 

“ No, no ; it is she who creates all the disturbance. If I get 
nearer to the wall she jams me up till I am as thin as a thread- 
paper. If I put her inside and stay outside, she cuts me out a s 
vou do a cask, by the chime, till I tumble out of bed,” 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


311 


“ Why don’t you make your bed larger, Mr. Oxbelly ?” 

“ Sir, I have proposed, but my wife will have it that the bed 
is large enough if I would not toss in my sleep. I can’t con- 
vince her. * However, she’ll have it all to herself now. I slept 
well last night, for the first tune since I left the Boadicea.” 

“ The Boadicea ?” 

“ Yes, sir, I was second-lieutenant of the Boadicea for three 
years.” 

“ She’s a fine frigate, I’m told.” 

“ On the contrary, such a pinched-up little craft below I 
never saw. Why, Mr. Easy, I could hardly get into the 
door of my cabin — and yet, as you must see, I’m not a large 
man.” 

“Good heavens ! is it possible,” thought Jack, “that this 
man does not really know that he is monstrous ?” 

Yet such was the case. Mr. Oxbelly had no idea that he 
was otherwise than in good condition, although he had probably 
not seen his knees for years. It was his obesity that was the 
great objection to him, for in every other point there was noth- 
ing against him. He had, upon one pretence and another, been 
shifted, by the manoeuvres of the captains, out of different ships, 
until he went up to the Admirality to know if there was any 
charge against him. The first lord at once perceived the 
charge to be preferred, and made a mark against his name as 
not fit for any thing but harbour duty. Out of employment, he 
had taken the command of a privateer cutter, when his wife, 
who was excessively fond, would, as he said, follow him with 
little Billy. He was sober, steady, knew his duty well ; but he 
weighed twenty-six stone, and his weight had swamped him in 
the service. 

His wish, long indulged, had become, as Shakspeare says, the 
father of his thought, and he had really at last brought himself 
to think that he was not by any means what could be con- 
sidered a fat man. His wife, as he said, was also a very stout 
woman, and this exuberance of flesh on both sides, was the only, 
but continual, ground of dispute. 


378 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


CHAPTER XXXVIII. 

» 

IN WHICH OUR HERO, AS USUAL, GETS INTO THE VERY MIDDLE OF IT, 

On the eleventh day the Rebiera entered the straits, and the 
rock of Gibraltar was in sight as the sun went down ; after 
which the wind fell light, and about midnight it became calm, 
and they drifted up. At sun-rise they were roused by the 
report of heavy guns, and perceived an English frigate about 
eight miles further up the straits, and more in the mid-channel, 
engaging nine or ten Spanish gun-boats, which had come out 
from Algesiras to attack her. It still continued a dead calm, 
and the boats of the frigate were all ahead towing her, so as to 
bring her broadside to bear upon the Spanish flotilla. The 
reverberating of the heavy cannon on both sides over the placid 
surface of the water — the white smoke ascending as the sun 
rose in brilliancy in a clear blue sky — the distant echoes re- 
peated from the high hills — had a very beautiful effect for those 
who are partial to the picturesque. But Jack thought it 
advisable to prepare for action instead of watching for tints — 
and, in a short time, all was ready. 

“ They’ll not come to us, Mr. Easy, as long as they have the 
frigate to hammer at ; but still we had better be prepared, for 
we cannot well pass them without having a few shot. When 
I came up the straits in the privateer we were attacked by two, 
and fought them for three hours ; their shot dashed the water 
over our decks till they were wet fore and aft, but somehow or 
another they never hit us^-we were as low as they were 
I’ll be bound but they’ll hull the frigate through. Mrs 
Oxbelly and Billy were on deck the whole time — and Billy 
was quite delighted, and cried when they took him down to 
breakfast.” 

“ Why, Mrs. Oxbelly must be very courageous.” 

“Cares neither for shot or shell, — sir — laughs when they 
whiz over her head, and tells Billy to hark. But sir, it’s 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


3?9 


not surprising ; her father is a major, and her two brothers are 
lieutenants in the bombardiers.” 

“That, indeed,” replied Jack — “but see, there is a breeze 
springing up from the westward.” 

“ Very true, Mr. Easy, and a steady one it will be, for it 
comes up dark and slow ; so much the better for the frigate, 
for shell get little honour and plenty of mauling at this 
work.” 

“ I hope we shall take it up with us,” observed Jack ; “ how 
far do you reckon the gun-boats from the shore ?” 

“ I should think about five miles, or rather less.” 

“ Trim sails, Mr. Oxbelly — perhaps we may cut one or two 
of these olf — steer in shore of them.” 

“Exactly. Up there, my lads, set top-gallant studding 
sails, top-mast studdings to hand — rig out the booms — keep as 
you go now, my lad — we shall be well in shore of them, and out 
of the range of the batteries.” 

The breeze came down fresh, and all sail was set upon 
the Rebiera. She took the wind down with her, and it passed 
her but little — half a mile ahead of them all was still and 
smooth as a glass mirror, and they neared and gained in shore 
at the same time. The gun-boats were still engaging the 
frigate, and did not appear to pay any attention to the Rebiera 
coming down. At last the breeze reached them and the 
frigate, light at first and then gradually increasing, while the 
Rebiera foamed though the water, and had now every chance 
of cutting off some of the gun-boats. The frigate trimmed her 
sails and steered towards the flotilla, which now thought proper 
to haul olf and put their heads in shore, followed by the frigate 
firing her bow-chasers. But the Rebiera was now within half 
gun-shot in shore, and steering so as to intercept them. As she 
rapidly closed, the flotilla scarcely knew how to act ; to attack 
her would be to lose time, and allow the frigate to come up and 
occasion their own capture ; so they satisfied themselves with 
firing at her as she continued to run down between them 
and the land. As they neared, Jack opened his fire with 


380 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EAST. 


his eighteen-pound carronades and long nines. The gun-boats 
returned his fire, and they were within a quarter of a mile, 
when Jack shortened sail to his top-sails, and a warm engage- 
ment took place, which ended in one of the gun-boats being, in 
a few minutes, dismasted. The frigate, under all canvas, came 
rapidly up, and her shot now fell thick. The flotilla then ceased 
firing, passing about two cables’ length ahead of the Rebiera, 
and making all possible sail for the land. Jack now fired 
at the flotilla as they passed, with his larboard broadside, 
while with his starboard he poured in grape and canister 
upon the unfortunate gun-boat which was dismasted, and which 
soon hauled down her colours. In a few minutes more the 
remainder were too far distant for the carronades, and, as 
they did not fire, Jack turned his attention to take possession 
of his prize, sending a boat with ten men on board, and 
heaving-to close to her to take her in tow. Ten minutes more 
and the frigate was also hove-to a cable’s length from the 
Rebiera, and our hero lowered down his other quarter boat 
to go on board. 

“ Have we any men hurt, Mr. Oxbelly ?” inquired Jack. 

“ Only two ; Spearling has lost his thumb with a piece 
of langrage, and James has a bad wound in the thigh.” 

“ Very well ; I will ask for the surgeon to come on 
board.” 

Jack pulled to the frigate and went up the side, touched his 
hat in due form, and was introduced by the midshipmen to the 
other side, where the captain stood. 

“ Mr. Easy !” exclaimed the captain. 

“ Captain Sawbridge !” replied our hero with surprise. 

“ Good heavens ! what brought you here ?” said the captain; 
11 and what vessel is that ?” 

“ The Rebiera, letter of marque, commanded and owned by 
Mr. Easy,” replied Jack, laughing. 

Captain Sawbridge gave him his hand. “ Come down with 
me in the cabin, Mr. Easy ; I am very glad to see you. Give 
you great credit for your conduct, and am still more anxious to 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


381 


know what has induced you to come out again. I knew that 
you had left the service.” 

Jack, in a very few words, told his object in fitting out the 
Rebiera ; “but,” continued Jack, “ allow me to congratulate 
you upon your promotion, which I was not aware of. May 
I ask where you left the Harpy, and what is the name of your 
frigate ?” 

“ The Latona ! I have only been appointed to her one 
month, after an action in which the Harpy took a large cor- 
vette, and am ordered home with despatches to England. We 
sailed yesterday evening from Gibraltar, were becalmed the 
whole night, and attacked this morning by the gun-boats ” 

“ How is Captain Wilson, sir ?” 

“ I believd he is very well, but I have not seen him.” 

“ How did you know, then, that I had left the service, Cap- 
tain Sawbridge ?” 

“ From Mr. Gascoigne, who is now on board.” 

“ Gascoigne 1” exclaimed our hero. 

“Yes, he was sent up to join the Aurora by the governor, 
but she had left the fleet, and having served his time, and a 
passing day being ordered, he passed, and thought he might as 
well go home with me and see if he could make any interest for 
his promotion.” 

“ Pray, Captain Sawbridge, is the gun-boat our prize or 
yours ?” 

“ It ought to be wholly yours ; but the fact is, by the regu- 
lations, we share.” 

“ With all my heart, sir. Will you send an assistant-surgeon 
on board to look after two of my men who are hurt ?” 

“Yes, directly ; now send your boat away, Easy, with direc- 
tions to your officer in command. Wc must go back to Gibral- 
tar, for we have received some injury, and, I am sorry to stay, 
lost some men. You are going then, I presume, to say on 
board and dine with me : we shall be at anchor before night.” 

“ I will with pleasure, sir. But now I will send my boat 
away and shake hands with Gascoigne.” 


382 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


Gascoigne was under tlie half-deck waiting to receive his 
friend, for he had seen him come up the side from his station 
on the forecastle. A hurried conversation took place, after our 
hero had dismissed his boat with the assistant-surgeon in it to 
dress the two wounded men. Jack then went on deck, talked 
with the officers, looked with pleasure at the Rebiera with the 
gun-boat in tow, keeping company with the frigate, although 
only under the same canvas — promised Gascoigne to spend the 
next day with him either on shore or on board of the Rebiera, 
and then returned to the cabin, where he had a long conference 
with Captain Sawbridge. 

“ When you first entered the service, Easy,” said Captain 
Sawbridge, “ I thought that the sooner the service was rid of 
you the better ; now that you have left it, I feel that it has lost 
one, who, in all probability, would have proved a credit to it.” 

“Many thanks, sir,” replied Jack ; “but how can I be a 
midshipman with eight thousand pounds a-year ?” 

“ I agree with you that it is impossible : — but dinner is serv- 
ing ; go into the after-cabin and the steward will give you all 
you require.” 

Our hero, whose face and hands were not a little grimed 
with the gunpowder, washed himself, combed out his curly 
black hair, and found all the party in the fore cabin. Gas- 
coigne, who had not been asked in the forenoon, was, by the 
consideration of Captain Sawbridge, added to the number. 
Before dinner was long off the table, the first-lieutenant report- 
ed that it was necessary to turn the hands up, as they were 
close to the anchorage. The party, therefore, broke up sooner 
than otherwise would have been the case : and as soon as the 
Latona’s sails were furled Captain Sawbridge went on shore to 
acquaint the governor with the results of the action. He asked 
Jack to accompany him, but our hero wishing to be with Gas- 
coigne, excused himself until the next day. 

“ And now, Easy,” said Gascoigne, as soon as the captain 
had gone over the side, “ I will ask permission to go on board 
with you — or will you ask ?” 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


383 


“ I will ask,” replied Jack ; “a gentleman of fortune has 
more weight with a first-lieutenant, than a midshipman.” 

So Jack went up to the first-lieutenant, and with one of 
his polite bows hoped, “ if duty would permit, he would 
honour him by- coming on board that evening with some of his 
officers, to see the Rebiera and to drink a bottle or two of 
champagne.” 

The first-lieutenant, as the Rebiera was anchored not two 
cables’ lengths from him, replied, “ that as soon as he had 
shifted the prisoners and secured the gun-boat, he would be 
very glad so did three or four more of the officers, and then 
Jack begged as a favour, that his old friend, Mr. Gascoigne, 
might be permitted to go with him now, as he had important 
packages to entrust to his care to England. The first-lieutenant 
was very willing, and Gascoigne and our hero jumped into the 
boat, and were once more in all the confidence of tried and 
deserved friendship. 

“ Jack, I’ve been thinking of it, and I’ve made up my mind,” 
said Gascoigne. “ I shall gain little or nothing by going home 
for my promotion : I may as well stay here, and as I have 
served my time and passed, my pay is now of little consequence. 
Will you take me with you ?” 

“It is exactly what I was thinking of, Ned. Do you think 
that Captain Sawbridge will consent ?” 

“I do ; he knows how I am circumstanced, and that my 
going home was merely because I was tired of looking after the 
Aurora.” 

“ We’ll go together and ask him to-morrow,” replied Jack. 

“At all events, you’ll have a more gentlemanly companion 
than Mr. Oxbelly.” 

“ But not so steady, Ned.” 

The first-lieutenant and officers came on board, and passed 
a merry evening. There’s nothing passes time more agree- 
ably away than champagne, and if you do not affront this 
regal wine by mixing him with any other, he never punishes 
you next morning. 


384 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY 


CHAPTER XXXIX. 

A COUNCIL OF WAR, IN WHICH JACK DECIDES THAT HE WILL HAVE 
ONE MORE CRUISE. 

As Captain Sawbridge did not return on board that evening, 
Easy went on shore and called upon him at the governor’s, to 
whom he was introduced, and received an invitation to dine 
with him. As Gascoigne could not come on shore, our hero 
took this opportunity of making his request to Captain Saw- 
bridge, stating that the person he had with him was not 
such as he wished and could confide every thing to ; that is, 
not one to whom he could talk to about Agnes. Jack, as 
he found that Captain Sawbridge did not immediately assent, 
pressed the matter hard ; at last Captain Sawbridge, who 
reflected that Gascoigne’s interest hereafter would be much 
greater through his friend Easy, than any other quarter, and 
that the more the friendship was cemented the more advan- 
tageous it might prove to Gascoigne, gave his consent to 
our hero’s wish, who called on board of the Latona to acquaint 
Gascoigne and the first-lieutenant of Captain Sawbridge’s 
intentions, and then went on board of the Rebiera and ordered 
Mesty to come with his portmanteau on shore to the inn, that 
he might dress for dinner. Gascoigne, now considered as not 
belonging to the Latona, was permitted to accompany him; 
and Jack found himself looking out of the window at which he 
had hung out his trousers upon the memorable occasion when 
the boatswain had to follow his own precept, of duty before 
decency. 

“ What scenes of adventures I have passed through since 
that,” thought Jack ; “not much more than four years ago, 
then not three weeks in the service.” Whereupon Jack fell 
into a deep reverie, and thought of the baboon and of Agnes. 

The repairs of the Latona were all made good by the next 
day, and Gascoigne, having received liis discharge-ticket, went 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


385 


on board of the Kebiera. The gun-boat was put into the hands of 
the agent, and shortly afterwards purchased by the government. 
The Rebiera’s crew did not however obtain their prize-money 
and share of the head-money, for she had seventy men on board, 
until their return, but, as they said, they had broken the ice, 
and that was every thing. Moreover, it gave them confidence 
in themselves, in their vessel, and in their commander. Our 
hero weighed a short time after the Latona, having first taken 
leave of Captain Sawbridge, and committed to his care a letter 
to Dr. Middleton. 

Once more behold the trio together,— the two midshipmen 
hanging over the taffrail, and Mesty standing by them. They 
had rounded Europa Point, and with a fine breeze off the land, 
were lying close-hauled along the Spanish shore. Mr. Oxbelly 
was also walking near them. 

“ When I was cruising here it was very different/’ observed 
Jack ; “ I had a vessel which I did not know how to manage, 
a crew which I could not command, and had it not been for 
Mesty, what would have become of me ?” 

“ Massa Easy, you know very well how to get out of scrapes, 
any how.” 

“ Yes, and how to get into them,” continued Gascoigne 

“ And how to get others out of them, too, Ned.” 

“ ‘ No more of that Hal, an thou lovest me/ ” quoted Gas- 
coigne. “ I have often wondered what has been the lot of 
poor Azar.” 

“ The lot of most women, Ned, in every country — prized at 
first, neglected afterwards — the lot she might have had with 
you.” 

“ Perhaps so,” replied Ned, with a sigh. 

“ Massa Easy, you get ebery body out of scrape ; you get me 
out of scrape.” 

“ I do not recollect how ; Mesty.” 

“ You get me out from boil kettle fox young gentlemen — dat 
devil of scrape.” 

“ And I’m sure I’ve got you out of a scrape, Mr. Oxbelly.” 

n 


386 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EAST. 


“ How so, Mr. Easy ?” 

“ How so ! — have I not prevented your quarrelling with you? 
wife every night ?” 

“ Certainly, sir, you have been the means. But do you know 
when we were engaging the other day, I could not help saying 
to myself, ‘ I wish my wife was here now, holding little Billy 
at the hatchway/ ” 

“ But at night, Mr. Oxbelly.” 

“ At night ! — why, then, I’m afraid I should have wished her 
home again — it’s astonishing how comfortable I sleep now every 
night. Besides, in this climate it -would be intolerable. Mrs. 
Oxbelly is a very large woman — very large indeed.” 

“ Well, but now we must hold a council of war. Are we to 
run up the coast, or to shape a course direct for Palermo ?” 

“ Course direct, and we shall take nothing, that is certain,” 
said Gascoigne. 

“If we take' nothing we shall make no prize-money,” con 
tinued Oxbelly. 

“If we make no prize-money the men will be discontented,” 
said Easy. 

“If no ab noting to do — it will be d — d ’tupid,” continued 
Mesty. 

“Now then the other side of the question. If we steer for 
Palermo, we shall be sooner there and sooner home.” 

“To which I reply,” said Gascoigne, “that the shorter the 
cruise is, the less I shall have of your company.” 

“And I shall have to sleep with Mrs. Oxbelly,” continued 
Oxbelly. 

“Hab fine ship, fine gun, fine men, and do noting,” cried 
Mesty. “ By de power, I no like dat, Massa Easy.” 

“You want eight months of coming of age, Jack,” observed 
Gascoigne. 

“It won’t make a difference of more than three or four 
weeks,” said Mr. Oxbelly ; “ and the expenses have been very 
great.” 

“But — -” 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EAST, 


38t 


u But what, Jack ?” 

“ Agnes.” 

“ Agnes will be better defended going home by men who 
have been accustomed to be in action. And, as for her waiting 
a little longer, it will only make her love you a little more.” 

“ Sleep single a little longer, Mr. Easy, it’s very pleasant,” 
said Mr. Oxbelly. 

“That’s not very bad advice of yours,” observed Gas- 
coigne. 

“Stop a little , Massa Easy,” said Mesty, “you know dat 
very good advice.” 

“Well, then,” replied Jack, “ I will, as I am quite in the 
minority. We will work up the whole coast — up to Toulon. 
After all, there’s something very pleasant in commanding your 
own ship, and I’m not in a hurry to resign it— so that point’s 
decided.” 

The Rebiera was steered in to the land, and at sunset they 
were not four miles from the lofty blue mountains which over- 
hang the town of Malaga. There were many vessels lying at 
the bottom of the bay, close in with the town ; the wind now 
fell light, and the Rebiera, as she could not fetch the town, 
tacked as if she were a merchant vessel standing in, and showed 
American colors, a hint which they took from perceiving three 
or four large vessels lying in the outer roads, with the colours 
of that nation hoisted at the peak. 

“What is your intention, Jack ?” said Gascoigne. 

“ I’ll be hang’d if I know yet. I think of working up to the 
outer roads, and anchoring at night — boarding the American 
vessels, and gaining intelligence.” 

“Not a bad idea ; we shall then learn if there is any thing 
to be done, and if not we may be off at daylight. 

“ The pratique boat will not come off after sunset.” 

“ And if they did, we could pass for an American, bound to 
Barcelona or any where else — the outer roads where the vessels 
lie are hardly within gun-shot.” 

Mesty, who had resumed his sailor’s clothes, now observed. 


388 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EAST. 


“What we do, Massa Easy, we do quickly— time for all ting — 
time for show face and fight — time for hide face, crawl, and 
steal.” 

“ Yery true, Mesty, we’ll crawl this time, and steal if we can. 
It’s not the warfare I like best of the two.” . 

“Both good, Massa Easy ; suppose you no steal board of 
polacca ship, you not see Missy Agnes.” 

“Yery true, Mesty. — ’Bout ship, Mr. Oxbelly.” * 

“ Mr. Oxbelly not good for boat sarvice,” observed Mesty, 
showing his teeth. 

It was dark before the Bebiera was anchored in the outer 
roads, a cable’s length astern of the outermost American vessel. 
One of her quarter boats was lowered down, and Gascoigne 
and our hero pulled alongside, and, lying on their oars, hailed, 
and asked the name of the vessel. 

“ So help me Gad, just now I forget her name,” replied a 
negro, 'looking over the gangway. 

“ Who’s the captain ?” „ 

“ So help me Gad, he gone on shore.’ 

“Is the mate on board?” 

“No, so help me Gad — he gone shore, too.” 

“ Who is aboard, then ?” 

“So help me Gad, nobody on board but Pompey — and 
dat me.” 

“ Good ship-keepers, at all events,” said Jack. “ A ship in 
the outer roads with only a black fellow on board ! I say, 
Pompey, do they always leave you in charge of the vessel ?” 

“No sar ; but to-night great pleasure on shore. Ebery 
body dance and sing, get drunk, kick jip bobbery, and all 
dat.” 

“ What, is it a festival ?” 

“ So help me Gad, I no know, sar.” 

“ Is there any one on board of the other vessel ?” 

“ Ebery body gone on shore. Suppose they have black maq, 
he stay on board.” 

“ Good-night, Pompey.” 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


389 


“ Good-night, sar. Who I say call when captain come on 
board ?” 

“ Captain Easy.” 

“ Captain He-see, very well, sar.” 

Our hero pulled to another ship, and found it equally de- 
serted ; but at the third he found the second mate with his 
arm in a sling, and from him they gained the information 
that it was a great festival, being the last day of the carni- 
val ; and that every one was thinking of nothing but amuse- 
ment. 

“ I’ve a notion,” said the mate, in reply, “ that you’re 
American.” 

“ You’ve guessed right,” replied Jack. 

“ What ship, 'and from what port ?” 

“ Rhode Island, the Susan and Mary,” replied Gascoigne. 

“ I thought you were north. We’re of New York. What 
news do you bring ?” 

“ Nothing,” replied he, “ we are from Liverpool last.” 

A succession of questions was now put by the American 
mate, and answered very skilfully by Gascoigne, who then 
inquired how the market was ? 

It was necessary to make and reply to all these inquiries 
before they could ask apparently indifferent questions of Ameri- 
can traders ; at last, Gascoigne inquired, 

“ Do you think they would allow us to go on shore ? the 
pratique boat has not been on board.” 

“ They’ll never find you out if you are off before day-light ; 
I doubt if they know that you are anchored. Besides from 
Liverpool you would have a clean bill of health, aDd if they 
found it out, they would not say much ; they’re not over-parti 
cular, I’ve a notion.” 

“ What are those vessels lying in-shore ?” 

“ I guess, they have olive oil on board, the chief on ’em. 
But there are two double lateens come in from Valparaiso the 
day before yesterday, with hides and copper. How they ’scaped 
the British, I can’t tell, but they did, that’s sure enough.” 


390 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


“ Good-night, then,” 

“Yon won’t take a glass of sling this fine night, with a 
countryman ?” 

“ To-morrow, my good fellow, to-morrow ; we must go on 
shore now.” 

Our hero and Gascoigne returned on board the Rebiera, 
consulted with Oxbelly and Mesty, and then manned and 
armed the two quarter and stern-boats. They thought it 
advisable not to hoist out their long-boat ; no fire-arms were 
permitted to be taken, lest going off by accident or otherwise, 
an alarm should be given. Our hero and Mesty proceeded in 
the first boat, and pulled in for the town ; Gascoigne shortly 
after in the second, and the boatswain, in the jolly-boat fol- 
lowed at some distance. 

There was no notice taken of them ; they pulled gently 
down to the landing-place, which was deserted. There was a 
blaze of light, and the sounds of revelry in every quarter on 
shore ; but the vessels appeared equally deserted as the 
American ones in the offing. 

Finding themselves unobserved, for they had taken the pre- 
caution to pull only two oars in each boat, they dropped gently 
alongside one of the double-masted lateen vessels, and Mesty 
stepped on board. He peeped down in the cabin, and per- 
ceived a man lying on the lockers ; he came up in his stealthy 
manner, closed the hatch softly, and said, “all right.” Jack 
left Gascoigne to take out this vessel, which he did very suc- 
cessfully, for it was very dark ; and although there were 
sentries posted not far off, their eyes and ears were turned 
towards the town, listening to the music. 

A second vessel, her consort, was boarded in the same way, 
but here they found a man on deck, whom they were obliged 
to seize and gag. They put him down in the cabin, and Mesty, 
with another boat’s crew, 'cut her cables and swept her gently 
out towards the American vessels. One more vessel was 
required, and Jack, pulling two oars as usual, saluted a galliot 
heavily laden^ but of what her cargo consisted was not known 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


391 


m this vessel they found two men in the cabin playing cards, 
whom they seized and bound, and cutting her cables were 
obliged to make sail upon her, as she was much too large to 
sweep out. As they were making sail they, however, met with 
an interruption which they did not expect. The crew belong 
ing to the vessel, having had enough amusement for the even 
ing, and intending to sail the next morning, had thought it 
right to come off sooner than the others : it was then about 
midnight, or a little later, and while some of Jack’s men 
were aloft, for he had six with him, Jack, to his annoyance, 
heard a boat coming off from the shore, the men in her singing 
a chorus. The galliot was at that time just under steerage way, 
her topsails had been loosed and her jib hoisted, but the former 
had not been sheeted home, for the three men below could not, 
in the dark, find the ropes. The other three men were on the 
fore-yard loosing the foresail, and Jack was undetermined 
whether to call them down immediately or to allow them to 
loose the sail, and thus get good way on the vessel, so as to 
prevent the boat, which was loaded with men, from overtaking 
them. The boat was not more than twenty yards from the 
galliot, when, not finding her where they left her, they pulled 
to the right and lay on their oars. This gave a moment of 
time, but they very soon spied her out. “ Carambo 1” was the 
exclamation — and the head of the boat was pulled round. 

“ Down, my lads, in a moment by the swifters,” cried Jack. 
‘ Here’s a boat on board of us.” 

The men were in a few seconds on deck, and the others, who 
Had now sheeted home the topsails, hastened aft. The vessel 
soon gathered way, but before that her way was sufficient, the 
boat had pulled under the counter, and the Spaniards, letting 
their oars swing fore and aft, were climbing up, their knives in 
their teeth. A scuffle ensued, and they were thrown down 
again, but they renewed their attempt. Our hero, perceiving 
a small water or wine-cask lashed to the gunwale, cut it loose 
with his cutlass, and with one of the men, who was by his side, 
pushed it over, and dropped it into the boat It struck the 


392 MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 

gunwale, stove a plank, and the boat began to fill rapidly j in 
the mean time the galliot had gained way— the boat could not 
longer be held on, from 'its weight, and dropped astern with 
the men in it. Those who were half in and half out were left 
clinging to the gunwale of the vessel, and as they climbed up 
were' secured, and put down in the cabin. Fortunately, no 
fire-arms having been used on either side, the alarm was not 
given generally, but the sentry reported fighting on board one 
of the vessels', and the people' of the guard-boat were collected, 
and pulled out ; but they only arrived in time to see that the 
galliot was under way, and that the two other vessels from 
Valparaiso were not in their berths. 

They hastened on shore, gave the alarm : the gun-boats, of 
which there were three at the mole, were ordered out, but half 
the : crew and. all the officers were on shore, some at balls, 
others drinking at taverns or posadas ; before they could be 
collected’ all three vessels were alongside of the Rebiera : and 
not aware that anything had been discovered, our hero and his 
crew were lulled in security. J ack had gone on board, leaving 
fourteen of his men on board the galliot— Gascoigne had done 
the same — Mesty still remained on board his vessel ; and they 
were congratulating themselves, and ordering the men on board 
to the windlass, when they heard the sound of oars. 

“ Silence ! — what is that ?” exclaimed Oxbelly. “ The gun- 
boats or row-boats, as sure as I’m alive 1” 

At this moment Mesty jumped up the side. 

“ Massa Easy, I hear row-boat not far off.” 

“ So do we, Mesty. Gascoigne, jump into the boat — tell 
the men in the prizes to make all sail right out, and leave us 
to defend their retreat — stay on board of one and divide your 
men.” 

“ Dat all right, Massa Easy. — Mr. Gascoigne, be smart — 
and now, sar, cut cable and make sail ; no time get up anchor.” 

This order was given, but although the men were aloft in a 
moment, and very expeditious, as the Rebiera payed her head 
round and the jib was hoisted, they could perceive the boom of 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


393 


the three gun-boats pulling and sailing not five cables’ length 
from them. Although rather short-handed, topsails, courses, 
and top-gallant sails were soon set, the men down to their 
quarters, and the guns cast loose, before the gun-boats were 
close under their stern. Then Jack rounded to, braced up, and 
the Rebiera stood across them to the westward. 

“ Why the devil don’t they fire ?” said Jack. 

“ I tink because they no ab powder,” said Mesty. 

Mesty was right— the ammunition chests of the gun-boats 
were always landed when they were at the mole, in case of acci- 
dents, which might arise from the crew being continually with 
segars in their mouths, and in the hurry they had quite forgot- 
ten to put them on board. 

“At all events, we have powder,” said Jack, “and now 
we’ll prove it. Grape and canister, my lads, and take good 
aim.” 

The commanders, of the gun-boats had hailed each other, and 
agreed to board the Rebiera, but she now had good way on 
her, and sailed faster than they pulled. A well-directed broad- 
side astonished them — they had no idea of her force, and the 
execution done was so great, that they first lay on their oars, 
and then pulled back to the mole with all speed, leaving the 
Rebiera in quiet possession of her prizes, which had already 
gained two miles in the offing. 

The Rebiera, as soon as Jack perceived that the gun-boats 
had retreated, was put before the wind, and soon closed with 
her captures, when she was hove-to till daylight, with the three 
vessels in company. Gascoigne returned on board, prize-mas- 
ters were selected, and J ack determined to keep them all with 
him, and take them to Palermo. 


394 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


CHAPTER XL. 

IN WHICH THERE IS ANOTHER SLIGHT DIFFERENCE OF OPINION BE- 
TWEEN THOSE WHO SHOULD BE FRIENDS. 

The two lateen vessels proved of considerable value, being 
laden with copper, hides, and cochineal. The galliot was laden 
with sweet oil, and was also no despicable prize. At daylight 
they were all ready, and to the mortification of the good people 
of Malaga, sailed away to the eastward without interrup- 
tion. 

“ Me tink we do dat job pretty well, Massa Easy,” observed 
Mesty, as he laid the breakfast table. 

“ Nothing like trying,” replied Gascoigne; “ Pm sure when 
we stood into the bay I would have sold all my prize-money for 
a doubloon. How do I share, J ack ?” 

“ Only as one of the crew, Ned, for you are a supernumerary, 
and our articles and agreement for prize-money were signed 
previous to our sailing.” 

“I ought to share with Mr. Oxbelly’s class by rights,” re- 
plied Gascoigne. 

“ That would be to take half my prize-money away. I shall 
want it all, Mr. Gascoigne, to pacify my wife for giving her the 
slip.” 

“ Ah, very well; I’ll get all I can.” 

For ten days they ran down the coast, going much too fast 
for the wishes of the crew, who were anxious to make more 
money. They seized a fishing boat and put on board of her 
the four prisoners whom they had found in the vessels, and ar- 
rived off Barcelona, without falling in with friend or foe. The 
next morning, the wind being very light, they discovered a 
large vessel at daylight astern of them to the westward, and 
soon made her out to be a frigate. She made all sail in chase, 
but that gave them very little uneasiness, as they felt assured 
that she was a British cruiser. One fear, however, came over 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 395 

them, that she would, if she came up with them, impress a por- 
tion of their men. 

“As certain as I’m here, and Mrs. Oxbelly’s at Southsea,” 
said Oxbelly, “ they’ll take some of the men — the more so as, 
supposing us to be a Spanish convoy, they will be disap- 
pointed.” 

“ They will hardly take them out of the prizes,” observed 
Easy. 

“I don’t know that ; men must be had for his majesty’s ser- 
vice somehow. It’s not their fault, Mr. Easy— the navy must 
be manned, and as things are so, so things must be. It’s the 
king’s prerogative, Mr. Easy, and we cannot fight the battles 
of the country without it.” 

“Yes,” replied Gascoigne, “ and although, as soon as the ser- 
vices of seamen are no longer wanted, you find that there are 
demagogues on shore who exclaim against impressment, they 
are quiet enough on the point when they know that their lives 
and property depend upon sailors’ exertions.” 

“ Very true, Mr. Gascoigne, but it’s not our fault if we are 
obliged to take men by force ; it’s the fault of those who do 
not legislate so as to prevent the necessity. Mrs. Oxbelly used 
to say that she would easily manage the matter if she were 
Chancellor of the Exchequer.” 

“ I dare say Mrs. Oxbelly would make a very good Chancel- 
lor of the Exchequer,” replied Gascoigne, smiling ; “ one thing 
is certain, that if they gave the subject half the consideration 
they have others of less magnitude, an arrangement might be 
made by which his majesty’s navy would never be short of men.” 

“ No doubt, no doubt, Mr. Gascoigne ; but nevertheless, the 
king’s prerogative must never be given up.” 

“ There I agree with you, Mr. Oxbelly ; it must be held in 
case of sudden emergency and absolute need.” 

“We’ll argue that point by-and-bye,” replied Jack; “now 
let us consult as to our measures. My opinion is, that if I 
made more sail we should beat the frigate, but she would come 
ap t with the prizes.” 


396 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


“ That’s the best thing we can do, Mr. Easy ; but let us send 
a boat on board of them, and take out all the men that can 
possibly be spared, that there may be no excuse for impressing 
them.” 

“ Yes,” replied Gascoigne, “ and as the wind is falling, it is 
possible it may fall calm, and they may send their boats ; sup- 
pose we separate a mile or two from each other.” 

“ Dat very good advice, Massa Gascoigne,” observed Mesty. 

This plan was acted upon ; only three men were left in the 
lateens, and four in the galliot, and the vessels, in obedience to 
the orders, sheered off on both sides of the Rebiera, who made 
all sail and started ahead of the prizes. This manoeuvre was 
perceived on board of the frigate, and made them sure that it 
was a Spanish convoy attempting to escape. The fire-engine 
was got on deck, sails wetted, and every exertion made to come 
up. But about four o’clock in the afternoon, when the frigate 
was eight or nine miles off, it fell calm, as Gascoigne had pre- 
dicted, and the heads of all the vessels, as well as the frigate, 
were now round the compass. 

“ There’s out boats,” said Mr. Oxbelly ; “they will have a 
long pull, and all for nothing.” 

“How savage they will be !” observed Gascoigne. 

“Never mind that,” replied Jack ; “Mesty says that dinner 
is ready.” 

After dinner, they all went on deck, and found that the 
boats had separated, one pulling for each of the prizes, and two 
for the Rebiera. In less than an hour, they would probably be 
alongside. 

“And now let us decide how w~e are to act. We must not 
resist, if they attempt to impress the men ?” 

“I’ve been thinking upon that matter, Mr. Easy, and it 
appears to me that the men must be permitted to act as they 
please, and that we must be neuter. I, as a lieutenant in his 
majesty’s service, cannot of course act, neither can Mr. Gas- 
coigne. You are not in the service, but I should recommend 
you to do the same. That the men have a right to resist, if 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


391 


possible, is admitted ; they always do so, and never are 
punished for so doing. Under the guns" of the frigate, of course 
we should only have to submit ; but those two boats do not 
contain more than twenty-five men, I should think, and our men 
are the stronger party. We had better leave it to them, iind 
stand neuter.” 

“ Dat very good advice,” said Mesty ; “ leab it to us ;” and 
Mesty walked away forward where the seamen were already in 
consultation. 

Jack also agreed to the prudence of this measure, and he 
perceived that the seamen, after a consultation with Mesty, were 
all arming themselves for resistance. 

The boats were now close on board, and English colours 
were hoisted at the gaff. This did not, however, check the 
impetus of the boats, who, with their ensigns trailing in the 
still water astern of them, dashed alongside, and an officer 
leaped on board, cutlass in hand, followed by the seamen of the 
frigate. The men of the Rebiera remained collected forward — 
Easy, Gascoigne, and Oxbelly aft. 

“ What vessel is this ?” cried the lieutenant who commanded 
the boats. 

Jack, with the greatest politeness, took off his hat, and told 
him that it was the Rebiera letter of marque, and that the 
papers were ready for his inspection. 

“ And the other vessels ?” 

“ Prizes to . the Rebiera, cut out of Malaga Bay,” replied 
Jack. 

“Then you are a privateer,” observed the disappointed 
officer. “ Where are your papers ?” 

“ Mr. Oxbelly, oblige me by bringing them up,” said Jack. 

“Fat Jack of the bone house,” observed the lieutenant, 
looking at Oxbelly. 

“A lieutenant in his majesty’s service, of longer standing 
than yourself, young man,” replied Oxbelly, firmly “ and 
who, if he ever meets you in any other situation, will make you 
answer for your insolent remark.” 


398 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


“ Indeed !” observed the lieutenant ironically ; “ now, if you 
had said you were once a boatswain or gunner.” 

“ Consider yourself kicked,” roared Oxbelly, losing his 
temper. 

“ Hey day ! why, you old porpoise 1” 

“Sir,” observed Jack, who listened with indignation, “Mr. 
Oxbelly is a lieutenant in his majesty’s service, and you have 
no right to insult him, even if he were not.” 

“ I presume you are all officers,” replied the lieutenant. 

“ I am, sir,” retorted Gascoigne, “ an officer in his majesty’s 
service, and on board of this vessel by permission of Captain 
Sawbridge, of the Latona.” 

“ And I was, until a few months ago, sir,” continued Jack ; 
“at present I am captain and owner of this vessel — but here 
are the papers. You will have no obstruction from us in the 
execution of your duty — at the same time, I call upon the two 
young gentlemen by your side, and your own men, to bear wit- 
ness to what takes place.” 

“ 0 very well, sir— just as you please. Your papers I per- 
ceive are all right. Now you will oblige me by mustering your 
men.” 

“Certainly, sir,” replied Jack; “send all the men aft to 
muster, Mr. Oxbelly.” 

The men came aft to the mainmast, with Mesty at their head, 
and answered to their names. As the men passed over, the 
lieutenant made a pencil-mark against ten of them, who ap- 
peared the finest seamen ; and, when the roll had been called, 
he ordered those men to get their bags and go into the boat, 

“ Sir, as you must observe, I am short-handed, with my men 
away in prizes ; and I, as commander of this vessel, protest 
against this proceeding : if you insist upon taking them, of 
course I can do nothing,” observed Jack. 

“ I do insist, sir ; I’m not going on board empty-handed, at 
all events.” 

“ Well, sir, I can say no more,” said Jack, walking aft to the 
taffrail, to which Oxbelly and Gascoigne had retreated. 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


399 


“ Come, my lads, get those men in the boat,” said the lieu- 
tenant. 

But the men had all retreated forward in a body, with Mesty 
at their head, and had armed themselves. Some of the sea- 
men of the frigate had gone forward, in obedience to their offi- 
cer, to lead the men selected into the boat ; but they were 
immediately desired to keep back. The scuffle forward at- 
tracted the notice of the lieutenant, who immediately sum- 
moned all his men out of the boats. 

“ Mutiny, by heavens ! Come up all of you, my lads.” 

Mesty then came forward, with a sabre in one hand and a 
pistol in the other, and thus addressed the seamen of the frig- 
ate : — 

“ I tell you dis, my lads — you not so strong as we — you not 
got better arms — we not under gun of frigate now, and ab de- 
termination not to go board. ’Pose you want us, come take us 
— ? pose you can. By all de power, but we make mince-meat of 
you, any how.” 

The seamen paused — they were ready to fight for their coun- 
try, but not to be killed by or kill those who were their own 
countrymen, and who were doing exactly what they would have 
done themselves. The lieutenant thought otherwise ; he was 
exasperated at this sensation. 

“ You black scoundrel, I left you out because I thought you 
not worth having, but now Pll add you to the number.” 

“ Stop a little,” replied Mesty. 

The lieutenant would not take the Ashantee’s very prudent 
advice ; he flew forward to seize Mesty, who striking him a 
blow with the flat of his sabre, almost levelled him to the deck. 
At this the men and other officers of the frigate darted forward; 
but after a short scuffle, in which a few wounds were received, 
were beaten back into the boats. The lieutenant was thrown 
in after them, by the nervous arm of Mesty — and, assailed by 
cold shot and other missiles, they sheered off with precipitation, 
and pulled back in the direction of the frigate. 

“ There will be a row about this,” said Oxbelly, “ as soon aa 


400 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


they come clear of the vessel. If the frigate gets hold of us 
she will show us no mercy. There is a breeze coming from the 
north-west How fortunate ! we shall be three leagues to 
windward, and may escape.” 

“I doubt if she could catch us at any point of sailing: they 
may come up with the prizes, but can do nothing with them.” 

“No; the boats which boarded them are already returned 
to the frigate ; she must wait for them, and that will give us a 
start, and it will be night before they can even make sail.” 

“ Fire a gun for the prizes to close,” said Jack ; “we will 
put the men on board again, and then be off to Palermo as fast 
as we can.” 

“ We can do no better,” said Oxbelly. “ If evei I chance to 
meet that fellow again, I will trouble him to repeat his words. 
Trim the sails, my lads.” 

“His language was unpardonable,” observed Jack 

“Since Pve been in the service, Mr. Easy, I hav6 always 
observed that some officers appear to imagine, that because 
they are under the king’s pennant, they are warranted in insult- 
ing and tyrannising over all those who have not the honour to 
hoist it ; whereas, the very fact of their being king’s officers 
should be an inducement to them to show an example of cour- 
tesy and gentlemanly conduct in the execution of their duty, 
however unpleasant it may be.” 

“ It is only those who, insignificant themselves, want to make 
themselves of importance by the pennant they serve under,” 
replied our hero. 

“ Very true, Mr. Easy ; but you are not aware that a great 
part of the ill-will shown to the service, is owing to the 
insolence of those young men in office. The king’s name is 
a warrant for every species of tyranny and unwarrantable 
conduct. I remember Mrs. Oxbelly telling one of them, 
when •” 

“ I beg your pardon, Mr. Oxbelly,” interrupted Jack, “ but 
we have no time to chat now ; the breeze is coming down fast, 
and I perceive the prizes are closing. Let us lower down the 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


401 


boat, send the men on board again, and give them their orders 
— which I will do in writing, in case they part company.” 

“ Very true, sir. It will be dark in half an hour, and as we 
are now standing in shore, they will think that we intend to 
remain on the coast. As soon as it is quite dark we will shape 
our course for Palermo. I will go down and look at the chart.” 


CHAPTER XLI. 

WHICH WINDS UP THE NAUTICAL ADVENTURES OF MR. MIDSHIPMAN 
; EASY. 

In half an hour the prizes were again alongside, the men put on 
board, and the boat hoisted up. The frigate still remained be- 
calmed to, leeward, and hoisted in her boats. They watched 
until she was hid by the shades of night, and then wearing round 
stood away, with the wind two points free, for the coast of 
Sicily. The next morning when the sun rose there was nothing 
in sight. Strange anomaly, in a state of high civilisation, where 
you find your own countrymen avoided and more dreaded than 
even your foes I 

The run was prosperous, the weather was fine, and the prizes 
did not part company. 

On the sixteenth day the’ Rebiera and her convoy anchored 
in Palermo Bay. The wind was light in the morning that they 
stood in, and as Jack had a large blue flag with Rebiera in 
white letters hoisted at the main, Don Philip and Don Martin 
were on board and greeting our hero, before the Rebiera^ , 
anchor had plunged into the clear blue water. 

The information which our hero received, after having been 
assured of the health of Agnes and her parents, was satisfactory. 
The disappearance of the friar had, at first, occasioned much 
surprise ; but as the servants of Don Rebiera swore to his re- 
turn without the black, and the letter of Don Rebiera, sent to 


402 MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY* 

the convent, requesting his presence, was opened and read, there 
was no suspicion against the family. A hundred conjectures had 
been afloat, but gradually they had subsided, and it was at last 
supposed that he had been carried off by the banditti, some of 
whom had been taken, and acknowledged that they had seized 
a friar, on a day which they could not recollect. The reader 
will remember that it was Mesty. 

The Rebiera received pratique, and Jack hastened on shore 
with Don Philip and his brother, and was once more in com- 
pany with Agnes, who,- in our hero’s opinion, had improved since 
his departure. Most young men in love think the same after an 
absence, provided it is not too long. The prizes were sold and 
the money distributed, and every man was satisfied, as the car- 
goes fetched a larger sum than they had anticipated. 

We must pass over th epros and cons of Don Rebiera and his 
lady, the pleading of Jack for immediate nuptials, the unwilling- 
ness of the mother to part with her only daughter, the family 
consultation, the dowry, and ‘all these particulars. A montli 
after his arrival Jack was married, and was, of course, as happj 
as the day was long. 

A few days afterwards, Mr. Oxbelly advised departure, as th< 
expenses of the vessel were heavy, and it was his duty so to do. 
Don Philip and Don Martin obtained leave to go to England, 
with their sister and her husband. Nevertheless, Jack, who 
found Palermo a very pleasant residence, was persuaded by the 
Don and his wife to remain there a month, and then there was 
crying and sobbing, and embracing, and embarking ; and at last 
the Rebiera, whose cabins had been arranged for the reception 
of the party, weighed and made sail for Malta, Jack having 
promised to call upon the governor. 

In four days they anchored in Yalette harbour, and Jack paid 
his respects to his old friend, who was very glad to see him 
The governor sent his own barge for Mrs. Easy, and she was 
installed in the state apartments, which were acknowledged tc 
be very comfortable. Our hero had, as usual, a long story to 
tell the governor and the governor listened to it very atten- 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


403 


tively, probably because be thought it would be the last, which 
opportunity J ack employed to narrate the unfortunate end of 
his father. 

“ I would not have said so at the time, Mr. Easy, but now 
the wound is healed, I tell you, that it is the best thing that 
could have happened — poor old gentleman ! he was mad, in- 
deed” 

Our hero remained a fortnight at Malta, and then Signora 
Easy was re-embarked, and once more the Rebiera made 
Bail. 

“ Fare you well, my lad ; what I have seen of your brothers- 
in-law pleases me much ; and as for your wife, it will be your 
own fault if she is not all that you would wish. If ever I come 
to England again, I will pay my first visit to Forest Hill. God 
bless you 1” 

But Sir Thomas never did go back to England, and this was 
their final adieu. Once more the Rebiera pursued her course, 
stopped a day or two at Gibraltar, shared the proceeds of the 
captured gun-boat, and then made sail for England, where she 
arrived without adventure or accident in three weeks. Thus 
ended the last cruise of Mr. Midshipman Easy. As soou as 
their quarantine at the Motherbank was over, they disembarked, 
and found Dr. Middleton and Mr. Hanson waiting for them at 
the George hotel. Our hero had scarcely time to introduce his 
wife, when the waiter said, that a lady wished to speak to him 
She did not wait to know if Jack was visible, but forced her 
way past him. Jack looked at her large proportions, and 
decided at once that it must be Mrs. Oxbelly, in which conjec- 
ture he was right. 

“ Pray, sir, what do you mean by carrying off my husband 
in that way ?” exclaimed the lady, red with anger. 

“God forbid that I should have to carry your husband, Mrs 
Oxbelly ; he is rather too heavy.” 

“ Yes, sir', but it’s little better than kidnapping, and there’s a 
law for kidnapping children at all events. I shall send my 
lawyer to you, that you may depend upon.” 


404 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


“ You hardly can consider your husband as a child, Mrs. Ox 
belly,” replied Jack, laughing. 

“ Very well, sir, we shall see. Pray, where is he now ?” 

“ He is on board, Mrs. Oxbelly, and will be delighted to see 
you.” 

“ Pm not quite so sure of that.” 

“ He’s very anxious to see little Billy,” said Gascoigne. 

“ What do you know of little Billy, young man ?” 

“ And more than anxious to be on shore again. He’s quite 
tired of sleeping single, Mrs. Oxbelly.” 

“Ah, very well, he has been talking, has he? very well,” 
exclaimed the lady in a rage. 

“ But,” said Easy, “I am happy to say, that with pay and 
prize-money, during his short absence, he has brought home 
nearly five hundred pounds.” 

“ Five hundred pounds — you don’t say so, sir ?” exclaimed 
Mrs. Oxbelly ; “ are you sure of that ?” 

“ Quite sure,” rejoined Gascoigne. 

“ Five hundred pounds ! — Well, that is comfortable — dear 
me 1 how glad I shall be to see him ! Well, Mr. Easy, it was 
hard to part with him in so unhandsome a way— but all’s for 
the best in this world. What a dear nice lady your wife is, Mr. 
Easy — but I won’t intrude — I beg pardon. Where is the brig, 
Mr. Easy ?” 

“Now coming into harbour,” replied Gascoigne ; “if you 
bargain, you can get off for two-pence,” 

“ Five hundred pounds I” exclaimed Mrs. Oxbelly, whose 
wrath was now appeased. 

“ By all power, she no fool of a woman dat,” said Mesty, as 
she retreated curtesying. “I tink Mr. Oxbelly very right 
sleep tingle.” 

We have now come to the end of our hero’s adventures; that 
afternoon they all started for Forest Hill, where every thing 
was ready for their reception. The Rebiera’s men were paid off, 
and were soon distributed on board of his majesty’s ships ; the 
vessel was sold, and Mr. Oxbelly retired to Southsea, to the 


MR. MIDSHIPMAN EASY. 


405 


society of his wfe and little Billy. Whether he obtained from 
his wife a divorce de, thoro , is not handed down. 

Our hero, who was now of age, invited all within twenty 
miles of home to balls and dinners ; became a great favourite, 
kept a pack of hounds, rode with the foremost, received a depu- 
tation to stand for the county, on the conservative interest, was 
elected without much expense, which was very wonderful, and 
took his seat in parliament. Don Philip and Don Martin, after 
two months’ stay, took their passage back to Palermo, fully 
satisfied with the prospects of their sister as to competence and 
happiness. Jack had no occasion to argue the point with 
Agnes ; she conformed at once to the religion of her husband, 
proved an excellent and affectionate wife, and eventually the 
mother of four children, three boys and a girl. 

Mesty held his post with dignity, and proved himself trust- 
worthy. Gascoigne, by the interest of a conservative member, 
soon obtained the rank of post-captain, and was always his 
devoted and sincere friend. And thus ends the history of Mr. 
Midshipman Easy. 


SSE HMD. 















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